Escape to the Movies: Snow White and the Huntsman

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Snow White and the Huntsman

Snow White gets another retelling and MovieBob explains why this particular version may or may not be worth your time.

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I really want to see what they were planning for the martial-arts-style version...

Are you team Huntsman or team Charming?

Too bad Theron's campy-ness isn't enough to Eclipse Stewart's lack of emotion. And wouldn't Snow White have to technically be alive in the first place for the apple thing to work?

"Christian Stewart, who has no visible, emotional, rational"

Well no shit, it's Christian Stewart, what'd you expect? Acting? PFFFT.

DVS BSTrD:
Are you team Huntsman or team Charming?

Here is what I have come to hate from this generation of fans. I mean, this kind of focus didn't even exist before Twilight came out (there were no "teams" in Harry Potter at first...)

Fucking twighlight ruined movies.

Wont bother with this at all, will stick to prometheus

I'm surprised that it wasn't "The Dictator".

OT:What do you expect from the clowns that gave us that crap-tastic version of Alice in Wonderland?!

And casting the zombie from twilight as Snow White was the worst idea EVER!

Thank You Bob. That joke at the end was hilarious and made my day.

So in summation:

Theron is awesome. Stewart ain't great. Hemsworth is barely in it. A great group of actors make up the dwarves who are apparently in this. And the rest is hacky slashy action.

Probably not going to see it, but I might simply because of Theron.

DVS BSTrD:
Are you team Huntsman or team Charming?

Oh Jesus Christ...

Aptspire:

DVS BSTrD:
Are you team Huntsman or team Charming?

Here is what I have come to hate from this generation of fans. I mean, this kind of focus didn't even exist before Twilight came out (there were no "teams" in Harry Potter at first...)

That's a load of bull, I remember the "Team Angel or Team Spike discussion" and since I have a brother only a year younger, there was not a franchise where we weren't picking a "team" so that we could argue/fight over who was the greatest all the time. I do agree that the mentality is crap, but it's not new.

OT. It's really a shame that this isn't good, cause I love the art-design/special effects in the trailers. Might go and see it anyway since it's one of the few movies this summer that me and my girlfriend both show interest in.

Tanooki Mario figure took 23 years to make? I prefer the frog suit anyway because of its wonderful uselessness.

DVS BSTrD:
Are you team Huntsman or team Charming?

I'm against the pasty looking one, so probably the mighty Thor.

Well, I wasn't interested in it to begin with, so no real loss for me. The martial arts version, on the other hand, sounds awesome. Shame that it got canned.

I believe the reason why Hollywood wants to remake Snow White so badly is because out of all the Disney Princesses, she's the one from which an alternate character can be developed (whatever that may be) since she has no real character in her original form. Snow White spends the majority of her movie singing in a forest, cleaning a house for some men, and then lying on her back waiting for another man to rescue her. It's pretty depressing really, especially compared to the other princesses. She has nothing going on except for being beautiful and waiting on men, which gives prime subject to make something interesting out of her.

That being said, I was so frustrated when they decided to cast Kristen Stewart as Snow White in this particular adaption: the girl whose recent fame has come from playing a character with no other basis than being (arguably) beautiful and waiting on men. It's even more disappointing to find that she brought no surprises; that in some twist of fate she ends up playing a character with personality in the movie. Instead, it sounds like she just Bella-ed her way through the entire thing, only helped by the fact that the writer's didn't create a clear vision for their new Snow White.

Jury's still out on whether I'll see this or not.

malestrithe:
Tanooki Mario figure took 23 years to make? I prefer the frog suit anyway because of its wonderful uselessness.

DVS BSTrD:
Are you team Huntsman or team Charming?

I'm against the pasty looking one, so probably the mighty Thor.

Most men are against the idea of rooting for Kristen Stewart.

so... after all that... you didn't say if this IS a good movie... or a bad movie.. say something like "don't support this crap" or "go see it".. you are telling us that there are lots of interesting things happening, but you are also saying that this movie is a cadaver... so... the real question today is "to see, or NOT to see?"

The entire problem with this movie is fairly simple. SnowWhite is supposed to be more beautiful/fair then the queen. Kristen Stewart has never been and will never be remotely close to as beautiful as Charlize Theron. So the whole thing makes no sense because the magic mirror's statement that there is one fairer and we see this Snowwhite and go hu?

There should be a scene in the movie when the Queen see's snow white and goes, "That? That is more beautiful then me." Laughs and throws the mirror out the window. And the casting director, and the script writer.

punipunipyo:
so... after all that... you didn't say if this IS a good movie... or a bad movie.. say something like "don't support this crap" or "go see it".. you are telling us that there are lots of interesting things happening, but you are also saying that this movie is a cadaver... so... the real question today is "to see, or NOT to see?"

MovieBob does the job a true critic should. Their job isn't to say whether or not one should see a movie, but rather come up with a laundry list of points that might persuade or dissuade your decision to see a movie, but ultimately leave the rest up to you. It's basically, "here's the pros, here's the cons, I'll leave it up to you which outweighs the others."

As far as I heard, the Brothers Grimm released Snowwhite in 1812 (Along with lots of other tales). So this year would be the 200-year anniversary. That could explain why two movies came out this year. But your probably right about the reasoning, why they chose this over other tales like Sleeping Beauty or Cinderella.

Mario as one of the dwarves?
Thats bad ass.

Rabidkitten:
The entire problem with this movie is fairly simple. SnowWhite is supposed to be more beautiful/fair then the queen. Kristen Stewart has never been and will never be remotely close to as beautiful as Charlize Theron. So the whole thing makes no sense because the magic mirror's statement that there is one fairer and we see this Snowwhite and go hu?

There should be a scene in the movie when the Queen see's snow white and goes, "That? That is more beautiful then me." Laughs and throws the mirror out the window. And the casting director, and the script writer.

I was going to say exactly the same thing!

punipunipyo:
so... after all that... you didn't say if this IS a good movie... or a bad movie.. say something like "don't support this crap" or "go see it".. you are telling us that there are lots of interesting things happening, but you are also saying that this movie is a cadaver... so... the real question today is "to see, or NOT to see?"

He said "the only real reason to see this...is Charlize Theron". Make of that what you will; doesn't sound like a particularly good film to me if the only plus point aside from a few interesting fantasy scenes is that one of the actors in it is good. I think his opinion's clear on this one.

Quite a shame, the trailer made this Movie look *really* good. I guess the trailer did its job.

I wonder if female movie buffs are patronised by this new obsession of female movies with love triangles? As a penis I'll never know.

DVS BSTrD:

malestrithe:
Tanooki Mario figure took 23 years to make? I prefer the frog suit anyway because of its wonderful uselessness.

DVS BSTrD:
Are you team Huntsman or team Charming?

I'm against the pasty looking one, so probably the mighty Thor.

Most men are against the idea of rooting for Kristen Stewart.

I know I don't. She really does nothing for. She is generic Hollywood cute, much like Jennifer Hewitt, Eliza Dushku, Sarah Michelle Gellar, and a lot of shows on TV.

malestrithe:

DVS BSTrD:

malestrithe:
Tanooki Mario figure took 23 years to make? I prefer the frog suit anyway because of its wonderful uselessness.

I'm against the pasty looking one, so probably the mighty Thor.

Most men are against the idea of rooting for Kristen Stewart.

I know I don't. She really does nothing for. She is generic Hollywood cute, much like Jennifer Hewitt, Eliza Dushku, Sarah Michelle Gellar, and a lot of shows on TV.

"Cute"? She always looks like she just finished bawling her eyes out before every scene and she probably bleeds chalk. That's not cute unless you have a fetish for drowned Geishas.

Look like I was wrong being this week going to be the Prometheus review. (So next next week then?)

Well, I'm seeing it anyway, since my girlfriend has made the logical leap of "If my girly movie has lots of swords and magic, maybe my boyfriend will be able to tolerate it," so I hope it's not too bad. I was sort of hoping Ms. Stewart might not be too bad as a lead role, and perhaps the stigma surrounding her was just a result of the movies she's been in thus far, but apparently not. And, at the risk of sounding cruel, I'm really not seeing her as 'the fairest of them all.'

Still, on the plus side, it certainly looks visually interesting, and I have strong suspicions that this is the best deal I'll get as far as a 'date movie' goes (unless someone releases a decent crime flick soon).

I think Snow White's lack of character could largely be blamed on Kristen Stewart being incapable of making any facial expressions.

If Hollywood wants to remake a Disney film with a dark bent, they should go for The Little Mermaid and actually base it on the original story.

This was one I was planning to see on DVD anyway and this review confirms it. As borish/uneducated as it may sound, sometimes you want films where you don't really care whats going on as long as whats going on is entertaining (Independence Day good version of this, Transformers bad) and this seems to fit the bill.

I would have probably loved this as a kid.
A female protagonist? Who kicks ass?

I was so frustrated as a kid because of the lack of such characters, and I was a fan of retelling of fairytales (or their older, more gruesome versions).

Too bad it's apparently not too good, although I'll still probably check this out, maybe on DVD.

I'm still waiting for someone to make a Cu Chulainn movie.

I mean just look at this.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/C%C3%BA_Chulainn

Who couldn't make a movie out of that?

I thought Snow White was popular due to the fact it's 50-year copyright has expired and so ripe for the taking.

Varya:

Aptspire:

DVS BSTrD:
Are you team Huntsman or team Charming?

Here is what I have come to hate from this generation of fans. I mean, this kind of focus didn't even exist before Twilight came out (there were no "teams" in Harry Potter at first...)

That's a load of bull, I remember the "Team Angel or Team Spike discussion" and since I have a brother only a year younger, there was not a franchise where we weren't picking a "team" so that we could argue/fight over who was the greatest all the time. I do agree that the mentality is crap, but it's not new.

Yeah, there were anime franchises that were based on milking this kind of Shipping since the early 90s at least.

And seriously--Kirk vs. Picard debates go back to the beginning of Star Trek:TNG ca. 1987.

I generally dont watch anything with Kristen Stewart in it as she has all the acting ability of a block of wood that someone drew a face on.

Suprisingly good array of actors as the dwarves though,

I read an interview with the screenwriter at Io9 where he claimed his original story for the script (almost 10 years ago) was basically a sword & sorcery version of Léon: The Professional, where the Huntsman would be a Jean Reno-style grizzled older badass who takes Snow White under his wing and trains her to kill the Queen. I would love to see that movie.

So, Snow White & the Huntsman sucks, what a shock...

Also, is it just me, or does Bob have a very unhealthy obsession with The Tanooki Suit?

Damn it Hollywood, you have a perfectly good love heptagon built right into the story as well as a perfectly good resolution: have Kristen Stewart's Snow White in a seven dwarf orgy!

You can make it PG-13 tasteful, have her swoon over them, have them go on romantic dates to the medieval mall or wherever and then a delightful scene of her looking longingly at a table full of handsome if short dudes before a fade to black. Then afterwards she can drink a poisoned apple Jamba Juice and fall asleep, and the dwarves and the prince can duke it out.

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