Escape to the Movies: Rock of Ages

 Pages 1 2 3 NEXT
 

Rock of Ages

A generic rock and roll love story starring an off-key Tom Cruise.

Watch Video

If I wanted to see a bunch of people acting like idiots I'd just go watch random YouTube videos.

What, no extra text at the end? Aww.

Kind of disappointing to see that this falls flat as just another movie wrapped in old rock music as an excuse to drive album sales though.

Also Tom Cruise singing? Poor Bob.

Clearly, Bob has never been to a theater pub...

I'm also wondering: who are those two main characters that haven't even been the feature of the marketing material.

And here's the big question: Is Tom Cruise as bad a singer as Pierce Brosnan in Mamma Mia?

Who ever invented the jukebox musical should forced to listen to one-hit wonders for all eternity

Where were the end text credit jokes?

Well, Bob, you sold me. I was on the fence about this one. After watching your review it's must see. Not that you're always wrong or anything. It's just that you pointed out the things that looked like they held some promise for being entertaining in the way they were meant to be entertaining lived up to that promise. And the parts that looked like they might just be entertainingly bad are genuinely bad. Now, are they bad enough to be entertaining? I can only find out by watching.

Seems like they never should have given this movie The Go-Go ahead.

The Gentleman:
Clearly, Bob has never been to a theater pub...

I'm also wondering: who are those two main characters that haven't even been the feature of the marketing material.

And here's the big question: Is Tom Cruise as bad a singer as Pierce Brosnan in Mamma Mia?

Apparently Cruise has a four octave range, Brosnan didn't even have one.

Hmmmm...

Moviebob seems to know a little more about music than he let on in that one Big Picture episode about stuff he didn't know. The observations were a bit simple, but it was pretty impressive that he was able to pull out themes from the decades. As someone who regularly listens to music like this, and plays music like this, I guess even then, I still never really realized how nonsensical most 80s music was. Though, my observations on 80s rock is a bit different, as in, 80s rock wasn't really rock. At least, most of it considered to be rock. But, they're still cool songs....most of them.

This kind of makes me wonder what he thought about "Across the Universe".

It funny I seen the show on Broadway, I feel like bod missing fun of the show self irony.

Was Rock of Ages really so depressing to sit through that you couldn't even think of anything to say in the end credits?

Dear God.

But... but... the credits...
I actually watched them twice to make sure I didn't blink too long and miss something.

That's My Boy must've been that bad if it doesn't even warrant a discussion at the end.

DVS BSTrD:
Apparently Cruise has a four octave range, Brosnan didn't even have one.

And apparently he uses all four of them, but none of them are timed properly.

I'm never a big fan of jukebox musicals. Things like Moulin Rouge or Mamma Mia were indeed awful, taking only the music into account. So, no I don't want to see Tom Cruise making an idiot out of himself. And pay 15 bucks for that.

Capatcha: *Virgin logo* describe this with any word(s): evil. Accepted.

no credits jokes ... *sadface*

you made a panda cry with that Bob.

as for the movie >.> i kinda expected this, i was never a fan of 80s music in general despite being old enough to remember those songs being 'big hits'

I have to say, Bob, it never ceases to impress me how much intelligent analysis you can squash into 5 minutes. This here is a fine example. Good Job, as Will Smith says in Hancock (which I apologise for bringing up)

OT; Ironically it was only yesterday that I heard on Planet Rock radio that Def Leppard had stated, after visiting Tom Cruise on set, that he sounded great. By sheer coincidence he performs 'Pour Some Sugar On Me' in this film.

Wow, I just realized how spoiled MovieBob has made me with his extra comments during the credits. I noticed today that I look forward to them as much as the actual review.

I mean, I know he does it as a bonus and isn't obligated, but please don't stop!

No end credit text jokes, that sucks. I wonder if the broadway musical is any better, since the people can actually sing (I would assume).

My pretentious pronunciation snob has to but in here and say, "It's Ka-Ra-O-Ke, not, Ke-Ri-O-Ki"

No notes? No jokes? No tidbits or news of any kind during the credits? I'm very disappointed but slow news weeks are slow I suppose...Hell, slow news week or not I'm sure ya could have slapped SOMETHING in there during the credits! Maybe an Alex Ross print or, a random trivia bit for those of us who don't know the significance/ place in the Marvel Universe of the Iron Patriot.

As for the movie, no plans to watch it.

Oh well, at least The Secret World of Arrietty and a few games will tied me over the weekend.

Conner42:
This kind of makes me wonder what he thought about "Across the Universe".

Considering his mini-rant on eras of rock music, I suspect he'd find that movie's choice of setting for such a musical much more appropriate re: songs about rebellion/revolution with a movie revolving around similar elements (with a love story thrown in because it's obligatory).

bob you and i obviously go to very different theatres. I go to movie tavern like places where they will serve me as much alcohol as i can pay for during a movie.

Also i wanted this to be good but had no real intentions of seeing it. musicals catch alot of flak for no real good reason other than they have dancing and sing-a-longs. And thats not fair. anyway not surprised, but a little saddened.

oh yeah, what up with the lack of funny credit one liners?

Not really into musicals, so this was a no-go for me from the start. I just want to say thank you for putting in Taz's dad. I use "yada yada" on a daily basis and none of friends know where I got it from :)

Bige1516:
Oh well, at least The Secret World of Arrietty and a few games will tied me over the weekend.

Damn, I've not seen that. Though apparently it's already been released in the UK. Must have been the most limited release I've ever heard of for a Ghibli film.

OT: I'm sad to not see any text at the end. Mainly just because I've gotten so used to it that it's a bit of a shame when it's left out.

ZZoMBiE13:
But... but... the credits...
I actually watched them twice to make sure I didn't blink too long and miss something.

LOL! I did too. I thought I must have missed it. Hopefully it makes a triumphant return next week!

As for drinking in theaters Bob really should get to Austin TX and check out the Alamo Drafthouse (AKA The theater from Youtube that kicked the girl out for texting) because you can get as plastered as you like there. All in all I can't say enough nice things about the Alamo Drafthouse. They have great projectors, great seating, don't put up with shit like talking or texting during a movie, and they serve real food and booze and it's an 18 and up establishment so no kids. It may be the happiest place on Earth.

Conner42:
Hmmmm...

Moviebob seems to know a little more about music than he let on in that one Big Picture episode about stuff he didn't know. The observations were a bit simple, but it was pretty impressive that he was able to pull out themes from the decades. As someone who regularly listens to music like this, and plays music like this, I guess even then, I still never really realized how nonsensical most 80s music was. Though, my observations on 80s rock is a bit different, as in, 80s rock wasn't really rock. At least, most of it considered to be rock. But, they're still cool songs....most of them.

This kind of makes me wonder what he thought about "Across the Universe".

You know, i always thought Across the Universe made one big mistake:

It had it's best song right at the beginning. I mean "Come Together" performed by Joe Cocker? They just can't top that.

The hair-metallers interviewed for Metal: A Headbanger's Journey claimed that 80s rock did stand for something. But it was mainly adolescent rebellion: "I'll show you, Dad! I'll grow long hair and wear makeup and jewelry and tight pants!" That's fine, but it doesn't really stack up against the previous decades. 80s punk, New Wave, rap and goth, however...

The Gentleman:
Clearly, Bob has never been to a theater pub...

We got a few in my part of Canada recently. It almost made Sucker Punch bearable.

Well, I might give this one a go as I recently discovered that my local large cinema started selling bear.

Captcha: mish-mash

So Rock of ages sucked... Noooo WAAAAAY!
Say it ain't so.

And the winner of the "I didn't need you to tell me that" award goes to...

New format was really annoying this time, I had to actively hunt to find the episode, had i not known it existed I definitely would have missed it.

Eric the Orange:
My pretentious pronunciation snob has to but in here and say, "It's Ka-Ra-O-Ke, not, Ke-Ri-O-Ki"

I don't think I've ever heard anyone pronounce it like.

And you have 2222 posts by the way.

I am disappointed that there were no credits/outro jokes to be had.

I will wait till it plays at my local pub, then I can drink and watch it for the price of a few beers!

There are certain scars of adolescence that seem never to heal. As such, when I saw you were reviewing this film this week, my heart sank. "Isn't 'Brave' out yet?" I thought.

But then you used the word, "Suck," with enthusiasm in the very first sentence, and my faith was restored. I dealt with self-aggrandizing douches quite enough in my formative years; no one needs to see them feted on the big screen. Thank you for the shredding; it was appreciated.

 Pages 1 2 3 NEXT

Reply to Thread

Log in or Register to Comment
Have an account? Login below:
With Facebook:Login With Facebook
or
Username:  
Password:  
  
Not registered? To sign up for an account with The Escapist:
Register With Facebook
Register With Facebook
or
Registered for a free account here