Escape to the Movies: Expendables 2

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AnarchistAbe:
Go see and formulate your own opinion!!!

I loved this movie for what it was: a campy, action flick with awesome one-liners, and a host of (now aged) action stars. Don't go into this expecting ANYTHING but what it is, and I think you'll enjoy it.

Addendum: I don't get the critical slaughter of this series... This is a tongue-in-cheek, self-refferential action film. THEY REFERENCE RAMBO DIRECTLY for fuck's sake!!! This was not TRYING to be a critical success. It doesn't take itsself seriously. I just don't undestand the mentality behing listening to a critic with a movie like The Expendables.

Nope. They already swindled me out of the time and money for the first one, because I thought it would at least be fun, and maybe have some decent action scenes, but since it absolutely failed to deliver either fun or goodness, they'll not get another cent or minute from me. Crap movie gets a sequel that is also panned to hell? Yeah, I'm really rushing out the door to waste money on that one.

Well. Didn't see the first one, will miss this too.
But Bob quite evidently has a hate-boner for this franchise.
Actually, I noticed he has a hate-boner for a lot of things, it's just that he tries to make an effort to hide it.
Oh, whatevs. If I didn't care what he had to say, I wouldn't have watched the review.

tehweave:
I hated Expendables 1. Moviebob, you are not alone.

The movie was incredibly thinly spread, and all the action scenes were dull. I didn't give a crap about the characters and I honestly can't remember a single plot point.

Didn't expect the sequel to amount to much either.

What I remember about Expendables 1 was hearing about how Machete did all of its action so much better...so I saw that instead and still haven't seen a either of The Expendables flicks. I'm guessing Ex2 didn't have any creative kills or at least none worth mentioning?

---

Sometimes Bob it seems like you're the only other person who admits to liking Punisher: War Zone and it's that kind of thing that almost makes me want to admit that it's in my top-3 favorite Super Hero/ Comic Book movies list. I don't plan on seeing this where it seems Paranorman is still in theaters.

Strain42:
Wait wait wait...so you're saying despite all the hype and build up that Chuck Norris is in this movie, he's only there very briefly and doesn't really do anything other than basically have the film reference the fact that he's Chuck Norris?

...I just won a $20 bet. Thank you Movie Bob.

This made me laugh! Money well earned friend, money well earned *gives you an internet to go along with it*

Bob, people didn't hate your review because it was negative, they hated your review because you were a big, self-obsessed crybaby about it.

It was painful to watch, week after week and did nothing for your already flimsy status as a low-level internet movie blogger.

It never ceases to amaze how people expect critics to share their opinions about movies. It's pretty simple, he doesn't like it so if you did just go your own way because neither of you are going to change the others mind.

(Un)Fortunately, this already isn't the worse piece of media created about the Expendables.

Why is he still harping about critics apparently not being shown the movie ahead of time?
Seriously, other people pointed out last week that this was completely untrue especially since a bunch of other reviewers/sites had reviews out the day before the release...spill, ign, etc.
Maybe they didn't screen it where Bob lives, but critics did see it ahead of time.

I heard that Dolph has like an IQ of 160. The guy is a genius.

Bob, did you honestly just say that you liked the original Judge Dredd? I'm not gonna get all fanboy-ragey or anything, I just honestly can't imagine how anyone could not hate that movie, even ironically its just abysmal.

So in a nutshell: I will like this movie!

Thanks!

Looks like you ARE in the critical minority this time
considering he loved Sucker Punch, i take all his reviews with a huge grain of salt. that movie was so bad i actually asked for my money back.

AnarchistAbe:
Go see and formulate your own opinion!!!

I think you've missed the point of internet critics.

The point is, I don't have twelve bucks to blow anymore. I want to spend it on something I'll like. I have various reasons to believe I won't like The Expendables 2, one of the reasons being that the critics hate it.

EDIT: When I say "The Critics", I'm referring to the ones I actually care about.

tony scott died on my birthday, that was a put down :(

Did anyone else think Van Damme looked drunk without the sunglasses? Too much Coors?

See Bob, how hard was that? You critiqued a movie based on the flaws in the movie and it didn't come across as a whiny rant from some nerd who had a rough time as a kid.

Bravo.

Didn't see the original because it looked bad and you said it wasn't all that good. Didn't see the new one because I actually didn't even see a trailer for it, and I didn't expect it to change anything from the first one enough to be worth a damn. Now I have your word I was more or less right without having to waste a dime on either, which is a nice bonus.

I always hated those campy, cheesy, stupid action films these guys stared in back in "the day" and I was more or less certain this wouldn't get me interested enough to change that.

Side note, Bob, how upset are you about Expendables killing another movie you say is amazing (last time Scott Pilgrim, this time Paranorman) at the boxoffice? Not trying to rub it in or anything, but it seems like a trend, and a relatively stupid one at that.

Also:

Azaraxzealot:
Looks like you ARE in the critical minority this time
considering he loved Sucker Punch, i take all his reviews with a huge grain of salt. that movie was so bad i actually asked for my money back.

You kidding me? I loved Suckerpunch! I thought it was a fun movie. Granted, I disagreed with his positive review of "Public Enemy" but that was really the only one I could call him out on.

Okay, so thats what he thought of it. Mine and Bob's opinions often differ wildly, but its still interesting to hear his opinion on movies. Still, looking forward to seeing this!

I loved it! Just brainless, crazy, cheezy, macho, over-the-top fun!
I mean, i laughed a lot during the movie, and that`s how they meant it. All those references and jokes, all that ridiculousness. That`s what i was hoping for, and by god, did i get it, and a lot of it. And i loved all of it!

The only bad thing i can say about the movie was the effects were pretty cheap, particularly at the start. But that`s all there is to complain. Otherwise, pure entertainment.

Aiddon:
He's probably used to it by now. What I don't get is why people get so defensive over archaic tripe like this movie.

Did you not watch his review of the first one?People didn't get defensive because Bob gave Expendables 1 a bad review.It was because Bob essentially called everyone who liked the movie and went to see it instead of Scott Pilgrim a moron and then proceeded to whine about it for several weeks after

Giving a movie a bad review = fine
Insulting your audience because you're butthurt that a movie you hated did better than a movie you like = not fine

Maybe these kinds of movies were never good and Bob has gotten to a point in his life where he can't appreciate them as the big piece of stupid spectacle that they always were.

Hey, I've never liked theses kinds of movies and I'm not going to see this one, but it seems hypocritical to nerd over comic book movies and B movie grindhouse schlock tributes, (which can be just as dumb), and gnash at crud like this for being blatantly what it is. As long as it hits a chord with the audience that liked these kinds of things way back when then the movie has succeeded in what it was trying to do. That's what nostalgia movies are.

i have a rule, every-time someone mentions Hudson hawk, I get to go watch it, just though I would share.

also the movie was a fun film to go and watch with a group of my guy friends, largely due to us growing up watching those guys in there actions films

AnarchistAbe:
Addendum: I don't get the critical slaughter of this series... This is a tongue-in-cheek, self-refferential action film. THEY REFERENCE RAMBO DIRECTLY for fuck's sake!!! This was not TRYING to be a critical success. It doesn't take itsself seriously. I just don't undestand the mentality behing listening to a critic with a movie like The Expendables.

So then why did everyone hate Duke Nukem Forever?

TorchofThanatos:
I loved this MOVIE!
IT was so much fun.

and HOBO with a Shotgun sucked! NO movie should ever do what that one tired to.

NO it is not a good movie, but it is a fun movie.

Sup with the random caps all over this post? I have a feeling you're just trying to get under bobs skin with this post. And personally, I enjoyed hobo with a shotgun very much but that's just me.

OT: Never watched the first one so will probably give this one a pass.

MetalDooley:

Did you not watch his review of the first one?People didn't get defensive because Bob gave Expendables 1 a bad review.It was because Bob essentially called everyone who liked the movie and went to see it instead of Scott Pilgrim a moron

Technically he said "as the obedient sheep of the moviegoing public lined up for their processed cheese." And even if he hadn't said that I'm pretty sure people still would have stamped their feet like impotent children anyway. Furthermore, if someone REALLY went to watch that instead of Scott Pilgrim they DESERVED to be called a sheep. Anyone who watched Sly's ego trip officially resigned ANY right to complain over Hollywood not having any ideas.

WDK89:
MovieBob is trying so hard to be a Roger Ebert on speed in every one of his videos it's just getting pathetic. He is a waste of space on this usually great web site.

What's up with you? He didn't like the movie and at least this time he didn't insult fans of expendables. Where is all this aggression coming from? He has to like mediocre action movies now or else he's a 'waste of space'?

I didn't like the first Expendables but the second is an improvement in just about every way possible, and a lot of fun to boot. Better villain, stronger, uncluttered story, bigger, more sustained action setpieces - this is one of the few sequels that truly learned from the mistakes of its predecessor. About the only thing I can agree with Bob on is the cinematography; this movie LOOKS. LIKE. SHIT. Surprising, considering Simon West has made some true visual stunners in the past.

BTW - the use of the "Good, the Bad and the Ugly" theme and the constant references to Norris being a "lone wolf" are obvious nods to the film "Lone Wolf McQuade." Surprised you missed that, Bob.

Terramax:
Meanwhile, movie Bob will like pretty much any super hero movie released, even when they're full of plot holes, cover no new ground, aren't funny when they're supposed to, action sequences are boring, the acting is sub-par, etc.

Hell, he even spent no less than 2 videos reviewing the Green Lantern trying his hardest to like it in some way.

What are you talking about? Bob tore that movie into shreds and couldn't find anything to like. Of course he's supposed to TRY and find stuff to like, that's kinda what you do when you watch movies.

[quote="tehpiemaker" post="6.386130.15379712"]Bullshit Bob, I actually like the movie.[quote]

did not mean to quote you computer is lagging alot today my mistake sorry Plz delete moderator.

AnarchistAbe:
Addendum: I don't get the critical slaughter of this series... This is a tongue-in-cheek, self-refferential action film. THEY REFERENCE RAMBO DIRECTLY for fuck's sake!!! This was not TRYING to be a critical success. It doesn't take itsself seriously. I just don't undestand the mentality behing listening to a critic with a movie like The Expendables.

Because it could have been so much better. A "campy, self-referential, tongue-in-cheek" can still be an excellent action movie, and this wasn't. That's why.

Aiddon:
Technically he said "as the obedient sheep of the moviegoing public lined up for their processed cheese." And even if he hadn't said that I'm pretty sure people still would have stamped their feet like impotent children anyway. Furthermore, if someone REALLY went to watch that instead of Scott Pilgrim they DESERVED to be called a sheep. Anyone who watched Sly's ego trip officially resigned ANY right to complain over Hollywood not having any ideas.

He might not have used the exact word "moron" but the meaning of what he said was pretty clear and as a supposed professional insulting your audience is not a smart thing to do.You obviously share Bob's opinion so good for you.Personally I thought Scott Pilgrim was a piece of shit and a waste of 2 hours of my life but I'm adult not to insult people for liking it

LazyAza:
It still boggles my mind how anyone who genuinely has any kind of brain in their head at all ever got any enjoyment out of the Expendables. No surprise the sequel is even worse.

But bleh trying to tell people who like the Expendables that they're stupid for doing so is like saying someone addicted to cakes made of shit should stop eating cakes made of shit. I mean it seems obvious but gosh darn they just can't get enough of that shit cake. lol

One could argue that you not understanding the movie makes you the stupid one. Your opinion is that, not fact.

Ahh that's too bad. I was hoping that this movie would be so flawed that at least Bob would get passionate in his anger, ala Green Lantern, and smack it down. But it was just boring, and boring is the hardest kind of movie to review because there's nothing for that passion to latch on to.

My solvemedia puzzle: "Baby Boomer" The irony.

You know, the difference in your, and your fellow critics' opinion, and say, the opinion of everyone else, captures perfectly the void between people who get paid to watch and review movies for a living, and people who do it recreationally.

Just because something isn't intellectual on all grounds, doesn't mean it can't be fun. So, if you're going to watch this movie, and you don't like wearing a monocle and pointing out how much better you are than everyone else when in fact you have no real reason to because you are most likely, in fact, the one everyone points out how much better they are than, then yes, you'll enjoy the fuck out of this movie.

If you want to see a bunch of iconic movie stars all in the same place beating the crap out of everything and eachother, and if you're the type of person who enjoys Mortal Kombat as a series for the, you know, just plain unrestrained violence every once in a while, then go see this movie. You will not be disappointed.

Back to my original, more constructive point. Guys, Bob, like most critics, is a critic. On top of usually being jaded on an extreme level (expertise in cinema), unless you share the exact same interest in movies that they do, you shouldn't take their words as more than a grain of salt. A movie they find good, may not be that great, for you, because the way they judge movies is different, and hell if I'll say better (it's not) than the way you or I judge them.

If you want real advice on whether or not to see a movie, and you aren't a critic, your peers are your best people to turn to. For, unless your peers, those that you would turn to for advice, are critics themselves, you are at a fundamental disconnect with people like Bob; this is by no means a bad thing, it just means you, like me, don't watch as many movies.

It'd be like, if I decided to critique guitars and decided to give everyone a slap on the wrist for buying Schecter because their old C8s have shorter scale lengths in an effort to balance the high and low ends, while taking away all versatility in the tuning. You won't care if you're not a hardcore guitar nut or at least someone who knows alot about guitars. They play nice, resonate sound well, and they look pretty and have great specs for the price. That's enough for most people to buy them and enjoy them. Doesn't make you less of a person. Should I really expect everyone to know all of that stuff and how to differentiate it? No. Should I call them idiots or gawk at their 'intellectual inferiority' because they don't? Fuck no. Am I making my point yet? I don't know.

I was kind of disappointed that movies called "The Expendables" weren't an attrition of big name stars- I would have enjoyed a movie about a blatently moronic group of mercenaries taking on suicide missions and slowly biting the big one, one by one. Sort of like Tears of the Sun (Not the best example, but it's what I think when I think attrition), but with steroids and slow motion. I was genuinely disappointed that at the end of the first one, they even kept the traitorous asshole guy, who seemed to have been well and truly murdered, alive. I have to ask: Why are they called The Expendables: What kind of a mercenary would label themselves as having unnecessary survival, and having done so, why are they never used in this way? Mercenaries very much would like to survive-they're looking to get paid.

Stupid rant on a silly name aside: I despised that review. I haven't seen the film, and it'll probably bore me just as much as the first one, but I'd actually like to see Bob go at it like normal: Refering to the actors by roles they had in films I may or may not have seen (Yes, I've seen most of the obvious ones, Terminator, Transporter, Die Hard) makes the review harder to understand for one, and while it's clever-the movies relying on itself being a reference to their better roles, so referring to those is making some sort of ironic mockery of that, it just bugged me.

And all I got from the rest of it was: Seemed no-one tried, blurry grey shots, with silly overexposure (Sounds like my last game of Battlefield 3), and that the actors fired shots randomly at nothing? A bit more detail and deconstruction like his other reviews and less cleverness would have been nice.

I think Bob has metioned a few times that he doesn't want his reviews to be taken as gospel.

Case in point - He got me excited about Captain America, I was quite disappointed.

I haven't seen the first Expendables yet, I'll get around to it eventually.
I think we all should accept that, as with all art, movies change their style and focus to differing audiences. Those audiences aren't always us.

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