Unskippable: The Witcher 2, Part One

 Pages 1 2 NEXT
 

The Witcher 2, Part One

Since leaving the PS2 in the past where it belongs, Paul and Graham enter this century.

Watch Video

I'm looking forward to your reaction to the next episode where I'm guessing you'll get to the part where Triss is wearing nothing. :P

Those guards were terrible! They couldn't even catch a cold!

Oooh. I can't even watch this. The game is still on my "to play" stack.

the mage was the only one who did anything
the archer and warrior sucked balls

I guess it's really difficult to make a joke worth a damn, when the trailer is so AWESOME...

Nice try, though. :) The joke about the D&D wizards was cool. :P

DVS BSTrD:
Those guards were terrible! They couldn't even catch a cold!

I...think you win.

But anyway, did anyone else think that the assassin looked like Heavy from Team Fortress 2? I just couldn't shake that thought off my head.

So now that PS2 month is over, I'm thinking... at some point, these guys should do Okami. I started it up again a few days ago, the opening is something like 15 minutes long and completely unskippable.

:D

As for this, yeah, those defenders really didn't do their job that well. Shocking, because he really doesn't seem like he'd be a tough target to hit.

Twin boxing?
How do you remember which one you bet on?

So this game is considered "dark fantasy" because its dwarves and elves live in ghettos? It was the middle ages. EVERYONE lived in ghettos. You were considered high society if you didn't need to use a steady supply of fresh dung as caulk.

Graham_LRR:
It's good to be back to new games, so we can see how modern technology helps games to suck in new and exciting ways.

If only you hadn't said that while featuring a genuinely good game...

SnakeoilSage:
So this game is considered "dark fantasy" because its dwarves and elves live in ghettos? It was the middle ages. EVERYONE lived in ghettos. You were considered high society if you didn't need to use a steady supply of fresh dung as caulk.

Ghetto as in "segregated, closed-off, guarded section of the city", not "poor neighborhood".

Mr.Tea:

Graham_LRR:
It's good to be back to new games, so we can see how modern technology helps games to suck in new and exciting ways.

If only you hadn't said that while featuring a genuinely good game...

Don't start. Unskippable stays out of politics.

See, that was both a funny episode and an awesome cutscene. The game is horrible, but the cutscene is cool!

Ahhh mondays. LRR is the only reason I like them.

Yeah that singing in the beginning of the actual game was really annoying. It really gets into your ears... urgh.

Bloody awesome game, this almost make me wish to replay it for a 3rd time... if only XCOM wan't coming out in about a month.

Yeah, how about you guys pair in one episode the intro of the original XCOM and that of the new one when it comes out?

That seemed like an extremely elaborate method of assassinating a king. Should've hired one of those Assassin's Creed dudes instead.

shrekfan246:

As for this, yeah, those defenders really didn't do their job that well. Shocking, because he really doesn't seem like he'd be a tough target to hit.

Yeah its funny in game when some Elf guy you talk to is like "Letho was so fast we didn't know what was going down!" and when you face him he is this giant pile of meat who lumbers around spamming cheap spells and swinging his sword REALLY slowly. Its very silly.

Mr Companion:

shrekfan246:

As for this, yeah, those defenders really didn't do their job that well. Shocking, because he really doesn't seem like he'd be a tough target to hit.

Yeah its funny in game when some Elf guy you talk to is like "Letho was so fast we didn't know what was going down!" and when you face him he is this giant pile of meat who lumbers around spamming cheap spells and swinging his sword REALLY slowly. Its very silly.

Oh jeez, don't remind me of how cheap his spells are. Bastard killed me something like ten times because he kept stunlocking me until I managed to get a decent enough strategy of dodging, Quen-ing, and taking quick pot shots.

shrekfan246:

Mr Companion:

shrekfan246:

As for this, yeah, those defenders really didn't do their job that well. Shocking, because he really doesn't seem like he'd be a tough target to hit.

Yeah its funny in game when some Elf guy you talk to is like "Letho was so fast we didn't know what was going down!" and when you face him he is this giant pile of meat who lumbers around spamming cheap spells and swinging his sword REALLY slowly. Its very silly.

Oh jeez, don't remind me of how cheap his spells are. Bastard killed me something like ten times because he kept stunlocking me until I managed to get a decent enough strategy of dodging, Quen-ing, and taking quick pot shots.

I think I eventually beat him by running away and throwing bombs at him (I had a lot of them) after he killed me in melee so many damn times.

Does this cutscene happen on starting the game up or something? I don't remember it at *all* and I'm not the usually the type to skip em...

tehweave:
See, that was both a funny episode and an awesome cutscene. The game is horrible, but the cutscene is cool!

Ahhh mondays. LRR is the only reason I like them.

Uh, no. It was not, by any stretch, a horrible game.

Illessa:
Does this cutscene happen on starting the game up or something? I don't remember it at *all* and I'm not the usually the type to skip em...

They added it for the Xbox release, updating all versions of the game with it and a bunch of other stuff that wasn't previously there.

They can show a whole boat turn to ice and then shatter, but every character is bald or has the hair hidden away...magical.

Ha Assassin college football!

Shizzlick:

shrekfan246:

Mr Companion:

Yeah its funny in game when some Elf guy you talk to is like "Letho was so fast we didn't know what was going down!" and when you face him he is this giant pile of meat who lumbers around spamming cheap spells and swinging his sword REALLY slowly. Its very silly.

Oh jeez, don't remind me of how cheap his spells are. Bastard killed me something like ten times because he kept stunlocking me until I managed to get a decent enough strategy of dodging, Quen-ing, and taking quick pot shots.

I think I eventually beat him by running away and throwing bombs at him (I had a lot of them) after he killed me in melee so many damn times.

Yeah I played through on hard the first time through with no prior knowledge of The Witcher series and every boss fight was total bulls**t. Letho was the worst though, if he was fast and aggressive I would totally love that fight but instead he is everything that is wrong with video game boss fights incarnate. He keeps himself topped up on the invincible wards and throws massively damaging spells with no choreography so you could never see it coming.

The only sword tactic is to run around him until the ward drops (woo fun) coax him into swinging his blade about for ages and twatting him from behind. If this guy was more aggressive and fast but squishier this fight could have been really exiting and stressful. Instead its just an overpowered cheap tank with tons of health, defeated through trial and error discovery of his AI attack patterns.

Mr.Tea:

Graham_LRR:
It's good to be back to new games, so we can see how modern technology helps games to suck in new and exciting ways.

If only you hadn't said that while featuring a genuinely good game...

The game quality is a matter of opinion, but the intro (while awesome looking) is a complete non sequitur in relation to the actual start of the game.

canadamus_prime:
That seemed like an extremely elaborate method of assassinating a king. Should've hired one of those Assassin's Creed dudes instead.

Judging by how they only learned to swim two hundred years later... that might not be such a good idea.

You know, that assassin's MO is really like what I'd do in an RPG game.

Plan A: Something so unnecessarily overpowered that I'll kill the target and everything standing anywhere near him.
Plan B: If Plan A doesn't produce a visible corpse, decapitate. It's the only way to be sure.

DoPo:

DVS BSTrD:
Those guards were terrible! They couldn't even catch a cold!

I...think you win.

But anyway, did anyone else think that the assassin looked like Heavy from Team Fortress 2? I just couldn't shake that thought off my head.

And now I can't unsee it.

image

I'm now seeing Letho doing that. Hope you're happy! =P

canadamus_prime:
That seemed like an extremely elaborate method of assassinating a king. Should've hired one of those Assassin's Creed dudes instead.

To be fair, it probably would've lasted as long, what with all the talking to the guy afterwards that those guys seem to do.

llafnwod:
[quote="SnakeoilSage" post="6.386787.15454713"]So this game is considered "dark fantasy" because its dwarves and elves live in ghettos? It was the middle ages. EVERYONE lived in ghettos. You were considered high society if you didn't need to use a steady supply of fresh dung as caulk.

Ghetto as in "segregated, closed-off, guarded section of the city", not "poor neighborhood"./quote]

That's what I said. Anyone who wasn't born into high society was basically a serf.

Kargathia:

canadamus_prime:
That seemed like an extremely elaborate method of assassinating a king. Should've hired one of those Assassin's Creed dudes instead.

Judging by how they only learned to swim two hundred years later... that might not be such a good idea.

Which is why they'd have to keep the boat intact.

Andy Shandy:

canadamus_prime:
That seemed like an extremely elaborate method of assassinating a king. Should've hired one of those Assassin's Creed dudes instead.

To be fair, it probably would've lasted as long, what with all the talking to the guy afterwards that those guys seem to do.

Yeah, I suppose that's true, but at least there wouldn't have been as much collateral damage.

The Random One:
You know, that assassin's MO is really like what I'd do in an RPG game.

Plan A: Something so unnecessarily overpowered that I'll kill the target and everything standing anywhere near him.
Plan B: If Plan A doesn't produce a visible corpse, decapitate. It's the only way to be sure.

Which makes you wander, if the assassin managed to freeze the king...what would he do then? I thought the decapitation was fairly important (haven't played the game, though). Would he put the king in lots of glasses, filled with beverages, and try to balance them to the shore or something?

why not employ witchers to protect the king? They must value the kings wealth

Huh... well that's weird, I own that game and played it a little way in but I don't remember that cutscene...

DVS BSTrD:
Those guards were terrible! They couldn't even catch a cold!

Nice one there.

Anyway, I thought that cinematic was pretty awesome, unlike the cutscenes you guys normally cover. Hadn't seen it before, either. That from the Enhanced Edition?
But yeah, I think it was a case of the-cutscene-was-cooler-than-your-commentary-*no-pun-intended*.
But it was still made better by your efforts, of course.

Am I the only one that liked the song :(

 Pages 1 2 NEXT

Reply to Thread

Log in or Register to Comment
Have an account? Login below:
With Facebook:Login With Facebook
or
Username:  
Password:  
  
Not registered? To sign up for an account with The Escapist:
Register With Facebook
Register With Facebook
or
Register for a free account here