Escapist Podcast: 059: Puffins & Gaming in Relationships

059: Puffins & Gaming in Relationships

This week, we talk about gaming in a relationship and when it's and isn't acceptable for spouses to ask you to give up aspects of geekdom. We also discuss how puffins taste and the film work of Hugo Weaving.

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Live Podcast?

Dear god, you'll have to get reader's questions via Skype - provided you pre-screen them first of course.

[edit] Damn, live as in live recorded. Wait before posting!

Well I liked it.

Especially Mikes "condiment smile"

OMG, I'm really starting to get concerned for Mike's nutrition. The list of things he doesn't eat just keeps getting longer and longer. It's just very disconcerting.

One suggestion for the "Comicbook are for children, and you're too old to read them"-problem, if it really just is an issue of perception; make sure to be caught reading something like...

It's not really that strange that many people see comics as something ment for children. You can be completely forgiven for only knowing of stuff like Garfield or Donald Duck or silly superheroes. The best way to demonstrate that it's more to the medium than that is to give an example.

But one thing to keep in mind when it comes to arguements in relationships is that if the reason seems petty or unimportant, it's almost always something more important lying underneath that is causing it. Like the example was in the podcast; it might not just simply be the comics and cartoons being childish, it might be that you're not pulling your weight as an adult, or something like that. Petty things often works like manifestations for the actual problems underneath.

I don't know how many times I've got to say that until I realize that myself. :<

And one final note; I might be very mistaken or just projecting here, but I imagine that there's people who see dating as something more akin to prospecting. "Oh, he'll be perfect once I'm done changing him", et cetera. Probably projecting, but it's worth to keep in mind. Does the person love -you-, or does the person love the potential you? Take this advice with a grain of salt, of course... It's exceptionally hypothetical.

Really nice podcast today everyone. I so want to go to the Escapist Expo! Seeing this live, for me, would be like you all getting to see Mike drinking mustard!

I hope the first E2 does well so I can go to a later one. Good luck, and have some extra fun for me!

I will defend Mike on the Mayonnaise thing. Mayo is just plain disgusting.

I present to you, the villain of Space Muffins! King Julep on his throne of cocktail swords!

http://qkme.me/3qpxk9

Okay, so there's no throne, but you get the idea.

Mike how could you eat those poor puffins.

Great podcast actually

When I read "Puffin" in the description I thought you were going to talk about the cereal.

PuffinBox:
Mike how could you eat those poor puffins.

Great podcast actually

Actually, that was evil Justin nomming on puffins. We've never really forgiven him.

From the Wolverine Origin typing attack schtick: Suspension of disbelief is a fragile thing. I can accept that your world have magic, mutants, psychics, ghosts, whatever but if you haven't told me that physics or mechanics works differently in this fictional world then if someone does something stupid like cock a shotgun before firing it... it breaks the suspension of disbelief.

There are better examples... but my brain is tired.

What was the transition music this time? I dig it.
It is unreasonable to hold a piece of fiction to the standards of another. It is not unreasonable to expect a story to be internally consistent as far as logic and tone. That's why I take such issue with The Dark Knight Rises' silly plot devices and failed fan shout-outs, because they contrast the serious tone Nolan had established in the first two movies.
Some people just get satisfaction from picking movies apart. And that's okay. It's a different way to enjoy them, and it doesn't make yours less legitimate.
As for relationships, geeky or no, listen to EG Kight:
"It takes a mighty good man to be better than no man at all."
Works in whatever combination of genders that may apply ;)

Awesome podcast. I like when ya'll don't have a super-specific topic and just kinda hang out and chat. Missed Steve though and what about updating us on the space muffin shirt?

Margarine....and...butter..."virtually interchangeable". You, dear Susan, will be getting an angry letter when I am less preparing a D&D session.

shiajun:
OMG, I'm really starting to get concerned for Mike's nutrition. The list of things he doesn't eat just keeps getting longer and longer. It's just very disconcerting.

I agree - it is a tad disconcerting - but I would worry more about any nutritionist who thought mayonnaise and blueberry pie were actually required dietary staples. :)

Daedrin:
Margarine....and...butter..."virtually interchangeable". You, dear Susan, will be getting an angry letter when I am less preparing a D&D session.

What? For baking, you can substitute margarine for butter one to one. I don't - as I said, I only use butter. But it can be done.

Susan Arendt:

Daedrin:
Margarine....and...butter..."virtually interchangeable". You, dear Susan, will be getting an angry letter when I am less preparing a D&D session.

What? For baking, you can substitute margarine for butter one to one. I don't - as I said, I only use butter. But it can be done.

Most margarine, at least around these parts, are meant to be a spread. thus they are made with higher air/water content and are highly unsuitable for baking in any way. Yes, there are special baking margarines and some recipes call either acceptable....but...they're definitely not something you really should change willy nilly.

Blrgh, I hate myself for throwing myself into this, but I gotta comment on the LOTR stuff, fanboy that I am.
Ok, so the Elrond thing. Yes, Elrond knew the ring was evil, but this was like, 5 minutes after Saurons death, and he had ben in possesion of it the whle time, so I don't think there were any ring-experts around to say exactly what the consequences would be. Murdering his ally might be a bit of a quick escalation, sure, in hindsight it might have been the right choice, but right now, it's simply Isildur making a stupid decision. What Elrond might have known about the ring of power is to not mess with it's weilder. Sure, Frodo and Gollum only used it to turn invisible, but Isildur is the King of Gondor, to start a fight with him on top of a volcano might not be the best idea.
Right, I had a rant about the technology stagnation too, but I've worked of my nerd-rage now, so Imma stop.
Awesome podcast. Thank you.

Juste a litte tip puffins are not as comes in Iceland as you think, I'm frome Iceland so I soulde know.
But a good podcast :)

Varya:
Blrgh, I hate myself for throwing myself into this, but I gotta comment on the LOTR stuff, fanboy that I am.
Ok, so the Elrond thing. Yes, Elrond knew the ring was evil, but this was like, 5 minutes after Saurons death, and he had ben in possesion of it the whle time, so I don't think there were any ring-experts around to say exactly what the consequences would be. Murdering his ally might be a bit of a quick escalation, sure, in hindsight it might have been the right choice, but right now, it's simply Isildur making a stupid decision. What Elrond might have known about the ring of power is to not mess with it's weilder. Sure, Frodo and Gollum only used it to turn invisible, but Isildur is the King of Gondor, to start a fight with him on top of a volcano might not be the best idea.
Right, I had a rant about the technology stagnation too, but I've worked of my nerd-rage now, so Imma stop.
Awesome podcast. Thank you.

"I was there Gandalf. I was there three thousand years ago. I was there the day the strength of men failed. Sure, I may not have known exactly what was going on at the time, and therefore couldn't have expected anyone else to ... but I was there, dammit, and, uh, well, I'm pretty sure it's mankind's fault. Regardless, we're late for our boat. Peace out."

I had Puffin when I went to Iceland too. It was really weird. Maybe we went to the same restaurant. I was disappointed though that for desert they didn't have Ice cream in a Puffin beak. You may as well go all out.

We have a chocolate biscuit in the UK called Penguins. They're delicious. A supermarket chain a few years ago got sued when they labelled their own-brand version of it as Puffins. I'm afraid I couldn't help but think of the Escapist crew travelling all the way to Iceland to have chocolate biscuits all the way through that discussion.

The passage of time in relation to technological advancement has never really been too much of a deal breaker for me when it comes to fantasy or science-fiction, there are numerous examples of dark ages and technological regression or stagnation throughout history to believe that the passage of time and generations automatically means technology will progress like a game of Civilisation. If three thousand years seems a little long then consider that the Egyptians had a dynasty for that long without developing a rail-road.

Margarine in Australia is very airy and not nearly as satisfying as proper, fatty butter, for spreading OR baking.
And I was about to say that copha butter is a nice way to make vegan sweets/pastries, but then I did a little research and saw that it's not readily available in the U.S.

When it comes to those major plotholes in LOTR, hindsight makes it all fall apart, but those kind of things mean we'd not have the story. Yes, Elrond could have saved us all some grief and gave Isuldur a little shove towards the edge (or even gave him a bop on the noggin). OR after that first council meeting where they come up with the plan to take it to Mt Doom, Gandalf should have called his eagle buddies and flown them there... I can live with those because everyone has those kind of moments in life where they forget some massive detail and it ruins an opportunity.

However, I do remember the scene Mike is talking about in Wolverine, it was stupid. Maybe you could say the mutant-thing could attack by itself but could be prompted to do certain things, but typing in "dodge" is... silly.

Mike Kayatta:

shiajun:
OMG, I'm really starting to get concerned for Mike's nutrition. The list of things he doesn't eat just keeps getting longer and longer. It's just very disconcerting.

I agree - it is a tad disconcerting - but I would worry more about any nutritionist who thought mayonnaise and blueberry pie were actually required dietary staples. :)

That reminds me, I haven't had my daily required intake of pie for today.

Daedrin:

Susan Arendt:

Daedrin:
Margarine....and...butter..."virtually interchangeable". You, dear Susan, will be getting an angry letter when I am less preparing a D&D session.

What? For baking, you can substitute margarine for butter one to one. I don't - as I said, I only use butter. But it can be done.

Most margarine, at least around these parts, are meant to be a spread. thus they are made with higher air/water content and are highly unsuitable for baking in any way. Yes, there are special baking margarines and some recipes call either acceptable....but...they're definitely not something you really should change willy nilly.

You get the same issue with "light" butter, which has a higher air-to-fat ratio than normal butter. Margarine is sold in stick form here, with the same density as butter - or in a more spreadable form, if you prefer, though obviously that's not suitable for baking. And of course we're not talking about that butter substitute stuff, like Country Crock...blech. I wouldn't even put that on toast, let alone try to bake with it.

I know it's tough to believe, but I do actually know what I'm talking about.

Loved the discussion on compromising in a relationship. It happens all the time in a relationship but the one thing we usually tend to forget is how to communicate and not to give in. Yes, we want to make the other person happy, but being selfish is ok too, particularly when you're already giving away time to another person. One of the most important things I've learned in the past few years is when to let myself have the things I want and when to let it go.

Communication baby! It works!

...Which will all be well and good to remember when I'm actually in one and not playing it solo with no worries about when I run, how often I game, and what I collect. (Which reminds me: Susan, your collection stories get better all the time. It sure is a wonderful/expensive hobby.)

I have eaten all the "strange food" you guys named except puffin. Just had elk again over the weekend.

Also I disagree with Susan. This was a good podcat.

On the "gaming and relationship" issue, I believe that if a significant other asks you to get rid of this stuff, which is an integral part of your identity, something's fishy. Of course, like you guys said, it all depends on how things are actually going down, there's a huge difference between saying "stop playing games" or "don't watch the Simpsons", and "could we watch something else" or "can we spend time together tonight".
I don't feel like I had to give up much when my husband and I moved in together. He works longer hours than I do, so I managed to log some gaming time before he got home. True, there are some concessions to be made when you move in with someone (that man is physically incapable of putting clothes in a hamper, and I've made my peace with that ^_^ ), but I certainly didn't feel like I had to give up part of myself, which would have been the case had I been asked to give up gaming.
The true concessions that have to be made are when kids come into the equation. Ever since our son was born, I have had to severely cut down my gaming time (and I'm okay with that, in case you're wondering XD ).

Anywho, great podcast! Really enjoyed the discussion!

Going to sign off with a much-loved quote:
"When I became a man I put away childish things, including the fear of childishness and the desire to be very grown up."
- C. S. Lewis

Susan Arendt is against value judgement in that "gaming in relationship" issue, yet the tone of her voice to "whatever guhh historical obsession he has at that particular moment" felt a bit judgmental. I don't see anything wrong with wanting more knowledge.

Wait, I just realized one thing
Susan isn't PC person.
Does it means she isn't modding her TES games?
SNAP OUT OF IT!!!
You know where am I at this point in TES5?
I'm in Elsweyr.
Do you remember Elsweyr in TES5?
Most probably not. Why? Because this is PC mod.
Fully voiced and well made mod.
And now another team is starting to work on Sumerset Isle.
Moders are expanding game world.
You're missing so much :(

blackrave:
Wait, I just realized one thing
Susan isn't PC person.
Does it means she isn't modding her TES games?
SNAP OUT OF IT!!!
You know where am I at this point in TES5?
I'm in Elsweyr.
Do you remember Elsweyr in TES5?
Most probably not. Why? Because this is PC mod.
Fully voiced and well made mod.
And now another team is starting to work on Sumerset Isle.
Moders are expanding game world.
You're missing so much :(

I remember from a podcat many moons ago she mentioned adding mods to Oblivion that changed night-time lights and another that changed... flowers?
Wouldn't be surprised if that whole "multiple platforms" thing comes into play here and she plays on both PC and a console.

 

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