Zero Punctuation: Medal of Honor Warfighter & Doom 3 BFG Edition

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Medal of Honor Warfighter & Doom 3 BFG Edition

This week, Zero Punctuation reviews one shooter and one, well you'll see.

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Ah, spunkgargleweewee. Or the SGWW Genre. Funny games critics panned look better in the light of crap like Warfighter.

Spunkgargleweewee.

hilarity ensues...[not sarcastic]

Glad Yahtzee distinguished between the two shooting genres for the thickies...

I come to this site for ONE person and just because I accidentally am here at the time when it is first posted I have to endure it not loading up and all these pop-up ads bork-ing the crappy computer I am on.

Let it be KNOWN World of Tanks that my interest has be diminished not raised by this "bombardment"!

...still waiting for it to come up... screen went dark and...

Despite what everyone says about Doom 3 being a boring "Monster-closet-fest", I actually found it quite charming in a "This game is hilariously predictable way", and this is one of the few games I've played where the game spawns enemies behind you at any point while playing.

When he said "Gargle something else" I'll admit, I wasn't expecting another bottle of mouthwash to pop up.

And I believe Doorfighter PAHAHAHA should now be Medal Of Honor's official title.

I thought half life or half life 2 would have made it to the shooter list.

Well, if thats the reaction that Medal of Honor got, id love to see what Yahtzee makes of Black Ops 2.

It's funny how people accuse him of not liking shooter when some of the games he give the most praise (Half-Life and Painkiller) are shooters.

I'm going to accuse him of not liking survival horror games for the bad review he gave Resident Evil 5.

I guess none of the titles he reviewed seems appealing to me. I guess I like modern shooters a tad more than he does, but only because he really, really hates them. Hilarious as always though.

Doom 3 may be redone, but at least it doesn't make the player redundent.

He mentioned my home town in passing!!! I feel special now.

"Fuck Swearer." I think I laughed up a lung. (LUAL!)

The comment about glowing "go this way" markers on levels that are strictly linear anyway brought to mind one (of many) problems I had with Duke Nukem Forever. All the pinball tables and urinals and writable white boards and what-have-you stop being verisimilitude-enhancing touches and become obvious petty distractions when they exist in the middle of narrow, linear levels with glowing "go here now" signs.

Funny review I admit that, but I am getting a little tired of people who like games like COD being accused of not being "real" shooter fans.

You know..... I think the "spunkgargleweewee" thing has some merit........ maybe a DIFFERENT name, but having a different title for the modern military shooter would probably benefit the industry, because right now everyone seems to think that they need to copy COD if they are going to do a MMS...... there we go

The MMS vs the FPS. That is what we need.

Yopaz:
It's funny how people accuse him of not liking shooter when some of the games he give the most praise (Half-Life and Painkiller) are shooters.

I'm going to accuse him of not liking survival horror games for the bad review he gave Resident Evil 5.

I guess none of the titles he reviewed seems appealing to me. I guess I like modern shooters a tad more than he does, but only because he really, really hates them. Hilarious as always though.

He doesn't like dudebro-shooters where you, as a player, are largely unnecessary. Doom 3, Painkiller and Serious Sam were made for people who want to play shooters. COD and BF and MOHFloorfighter were made for people who want to hide behind sacks of sand and scream racist terms in to their head-sets.

You know, after seeing the opinions of first that biscuit-youtube-person and now Yathzee, I'm starting to think Warfighter was specifically made to be as ridiculously horrible as possible, so that the entire industry just stops making them. The makers of Warfighter must love (real) shooters as much as Yahtzee, because I don't believe you can make something that bad if you don't know what's good. Accidentally bad only ever ends up blandly mediocre; complete terribleness requires true effort.

... at least that's what I'm hoping.

erttheking:
Funny review I admit that, but I am getting a little tired of people who like games like COD being accused of not being "real" shooter fans.

They're not real shooter fans. They're wall-hugging simulator fans and wouldn't survive a single level in a game where they didn't have a barricade of sand to hide behind while waiting for their health to regenerate.

No mentioning of the driving-sequences if Warfighter? Seriously, as horrible as the game may be - THAT they did right. (Ironic, that the best part of a shooter is the one, where you DON'T SHOOT A SINGLE THING!)

Regarding the name - I would still call them shooter, but I think TotalBiscuits idea of giving them an own sub-genre (Modern Military Shooter, MMS) is a good idea. Just... give them a more fitting name. Like "Point and click movies".

Yopaz:
I'm going to accuse him of not liking survival horror games for the bad review he gave Resident Evil 5.

Might as well accuse him to not like Survival Horror due not liking Mario. Because RE left the "Survival Horror" pretty much the same time they went to Third-Person. RE4 still had SOME of it left with it's atmosphere, but after that... nope.

Sylveria:

erttheking:
Funny review I admit that, but I am getting a little tired of people who like games like COD being accused of not being "real" shooter fans.

They're not real shooter fans. They're wall-hugging simulator fans and wouldn't survive a single level in a game where they didn't have a barricade of sand to hide behind while waiting for their health to regenerate.

You know, this is what I would call a self demonstrating article.

can I PLEASE get a transcript for everything from "you just do not like shooters." onward?

gigastar:
Well, if thats the reaction that Medal of Honor got, id love to see what Yahtzee makes of Black Ops 2.

I wonder if he'll even bother. I'm pretty sure he picks the games himself and picking something as popular as a CoD game gets views, but he really seemed burned out on the genre after this. Maybe he'll just mention it in a review for some other game and be done with it. Mere speculation, ofcourse.

Sylveria:

erttheking:
Funny review I admit that, but I am getting a little tired of people who like games like COD being accused of not being "real" shooter fans.

They're not real shooter fans. They're wall-hugging simulator fans and wouldn't survive a single level in a game where they didn't have a barricade of sand to hide behind while waiting for their health to regenerate.

How nice of you.I admit that I like Call Of Duty and I like Half Life 2, Stalker and other "shooters" who are not, as you call them Dudebro shooters. So what does that make me then?

Sylveria:

Yopaz:
It's funny how people accuse him of not liking shooter when some of the games he give the most praise (Half-Life and Painkiller) are shooters.

I'm going to accuse him of not liking survival horror games for the bad review he gave Resident Evil 5.

I guess none of the titles he reviewed seems appealing to me. I guess I like modern shooters a tad more than he does, but only because he really, really hates them. Hilarious as always though.

He doesn't like dudebro-shooters where you, as a player, are largely unnecessary. Doom 3, Painkiller and Serious Sam were made for people who want to play shooters. COD and BF and MOHFloorfighter were made for people who want to hide behind sacks of sand and scream racist terms in to their head-sets.

Wow, thanks for informing me about that, I did not know that. It's not like he said anything about that in his review or that I said it's silly to think he dislikes shooters in my comment or something.

ok since ol ZP is making a comparison between COD and real shooters (thank ronswanson) i now call he must play Halo 4... After years of being subjected to "i'll just sit here and wait for my team to kill everything" shooters I decided to start Halo4 on heroic (used to finish every halo on legendary) and oh crikey did I get my cheeks served to me on a silver platter...

Being el solo once more has proven to be very difficult and VERY exciting!! Ok mind I've only played the first few missions but I have high hopes this game will continue kicking my ass...

Oh ya, and to put the whole xbox vs ps3 on graphics thing to rest. All u PS fanboys, organize an HDTV, Xbox 360 Slim, and Halo 4... it is honestly prettier than anything I've ever seen on a screen in my entire life...

Peace x 3

So who else is going to try their hardest to make sure that spunkgargleweewee catches on?

Now here's a serious question though...

Bioshock = Shooter, right? But would Bioshock 2 = Spunkgargleweewee

And from what I've seen the next Bioshock will be back up to Shooter.

You know it's a good day when Yahtzee calls COD players, "Ignorant little bastards." I can't remember the last time I laughed that hard at a Zero Punctuation.

I don't normally go in for sycophancy, but I'd like to give a slow clap for 4:36 - 5:00.

I don't know why, but this is probably one of the best reviews lately. Not that the other recent once have been bad, this one was just funnier. Oddly enough, I've recently begun playing Painkiller_ Black Edition (again), so this video does feel a bit topical. Especially once I realized how much fun it was to bunny hop around the battlefield with a shotgun in one hand, and the Stake-gun in the other.

Especially loved the line "Stick your balls up your arse, and clench yourself castrated"...

Neiloken:
ok since ol ZP is making a comparison between COD and real shooters (thank ronswanson) i now call he must play Halo 4... After years of being subjected to "i'll just sit here and wait for my team to kill everything" shooters I decided to start Halo4 on heroic (used to finish every halo on legendary) and oh crikey did I get my cheeks served to me on a silver platter...

Being el solo once more has proven to be very difficult and VERY exciting!! Ok mind I've only played the first few missions but I have high hopes this game will continue kicking my ass...

Oh ya, and to put the whole xbox vs ps3 on graphics thing to rest. All u PS fanboys, organize an HDTV, Xbox 360 Slim, and Halo 4... it is honestly prettier than anything I've ever seen on a screen in my entire life...

Peace x 3

Yeah, if you're expecting to let your teammates in Halo do anything you're going to let yourself get laughed at by any experienced Halo player. UNSC marines on any difficulty higher than Normal tend to have a life span of 20 seconds, and letting them drive is just suicidal. Incidentally I'm not a fan of COD style shooters myself and it's why I like Halo...I just don't like people who jump on the people that like them and says that they're not real shooter fans. Just rings as "no true Scotsman"

YES! THANK YOU, YAHTZEE!

Alright...Modern Warcrapmakers, pay attention to this man. THIS is what a shooter is supposed to be! Bring THIS kind of gameplay back!

erttheking:

Neiloken:
ok since ol ZP is making a comparison between COD and real shooters (thank ronswanson) i now call he must play Halo 4... After years of being subjected to "i'll just sit here and wait for my team to kill everything" shooters I decided to start Halo4 on heroic (used to finish every halo on legendary) and oh crikey did I get my cheeks served to me on a silver platter...

Being el solo once more has proven to be very difficult and VERY exciting!! Ok mind I've only played the first few missions but I have high hopes this game will continue kicking my ass...

Oh ya, and to put the whole xbox vs ps3 on graphics thing to rest. All u PS fanboys, organize an HDTV, Xbox 360 Slim, and Halo 4... it is honestly prettier than anything I've ever seen on a screen in my entire life...

Peace x 3

Yeah, if you're expecting to let your teammates in Halo do anything you're going to let yourself get laughed at by any experienced Halo player. UNSC marines on any difficulty higher than Normal tend to have a life span of 20 seconds, and letting them drive is just suicidal. Incidentally I'm not a fan of COD style shooters myself and it's why I like Halo...I just don't like people who jump on the people that like them and says that they're not real shooter fans. Just rings as "no true Scotsman"

QFT brother.I'm so fucking tired of video game nerd hating on COD. Just ignore COD then if you hate it so fucking much!

Yahtzee's laugh is both amusing and creepy at the same time.

MorganL4:
You know..... I think the "spunkgargleweewee" thing has some merit........ maybe a DIFFERENT name, but having a different title for the modern military shooter would probably benefit the industry, because right now everyone seems to think that they need to copy COD if they are going to do a MMS...... there we go

The MMS vs the FPS. That is what we need.

MMS is already taken- by Massive Multiplayer Shooters (like Planetside for example)

But SGWW perfectly embodies all ridiculous things CoD, BF and MoH stand for

Sylveria:

erttheking:
Funny review I admit that, but I am getting a little tired of people who like games like COD being accused of not being "real" shooter fans.

They're not real shooter fans. They're wall-hugging simulator fans and wouldn't survive a single level in a game where they didn't have a barricade of sand to hide behind while waiting for their health to regenerate.

Uh. No.

When I got into the shooter genre, I started out with Call of Duty. Then I went to playing Half Life and Painkiller later on and did just fine.

Each of these types of game are shooters, there is just different tiers of shooter.

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