Zero Punctuation: Call of Duty: Black Ops 2

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Call of Duty: Black Ops 2

This week, Zero Punctuation reviews Codblops 2.

Watch Video

Ah, spunkgargleweewee reviews. My favourite.

'says a nearby cunt' XD

Had to stop watching cause of potential spoilers, (too busy njoying multiplayer to play campaign) first part of the video was bloody hilarious though

No way, you actually reviewed it?!

u2rocksbaby:
No way, you actually reviewed it?!

Well since he aldo reviewed Halo 4 he pretty much had to.

No mention of the ZOMBIEs eh?

I'd have to disagree with Yahtzee here, I found Blops II quite enjoyable.

Although he is definitely right about Tony Todd having an obsession with the word "cocksucker"

I do love it when Yahtzee tears into the socio-political implications of a game. Amazing rant on white privilege in this one.

Well, I can name about 7 people in the R&P Pit that will stop watching Yahtzee forever.

OT: Can you tell Yahtzee is sick of the these games yet? This was half review, half political bender.

It was nice to see that pretty much every character had a fairly serious reason to be hated instead of the standard "you are an obvious good guy and they are all baddies..."

Well BlOps 1 finally broke CoD's magic spell on me so I was never hopeful about this game. Seems like I was right not to be. Guess I'll just get Dishonored for Christmas.

Man, I was waiting for WEEKS for him to rip this game to shreds, and it did not dissapoint. A message to the game industry: STOP MAKING MODERN MILITARY SHOOTERS! Spec Ops: The Line has allready pointed out everything wrong about the genre, you don't need to keep making shitty war games to prove it's point!

I didn't know who it was with the bag over their head...

Yathzee does not like the new call of duty in other news the sky is blue.

When said aloud, the word "CodBlops" sounds oddly unsavoury.

Gearhead mk2:
Man, I was waiting for WEEKS for him to rip this game to shreds, and it did not dissapoint. A message to the game industry: STOP MAKING MODERN MILITARY SHOOTERS! Spec Ops: The Line has allready pointed out everything wrong about the genre, you don't need to keep making shitty war games to prove it's point!

Considering it, once again, set the record for the most money made in 24 hours, I highly doubt they will stop making them any time soon. The video game industry is still a business that is trying to make money.

Wow, worst review EVER! Any professional review would give this game, the most amazing in history, a 90-100 or 4/5. Every single part of this game is new and interesting and amazing, you're inability to recognize that demonstrates how bad you are at reviewing. When COD:B03 comes out in 2 years you can correct you mistake by giving it a 90-100 like every other reviewer will. Be sure to do the same for COD:MW4, COD:MW5, COD:BO4, COD:MW6, etc. They will ALL be amazing and look amazing and just be more amazing then the amazingly amazing game that came before. In fact they'll be so amazing they'll amaze you into an amazement coma of amazement.

Well that was less amusing then I thought it was gonna be, and strangely more annoying as well.

Strange, I usually enjoy watching him rip these games apart

Ah, I've been waiting for this roast with anticipation ever since the game had been released to obnoxious, undeserved praise by the larger chunk of gaming publications. Nice to see Yahtzee telling it like it is.

It is slightly hypocritical to say that white people were randomly selected to be born the most privileged people on the planet and saying we can't complain about racism against us in the same breath. Yes us being privileged is something we're born into, but so is the whole history of oppressing the blacks thing. I have every right to complain about them being racist towards whites because just as I didn't do anything to deserve the privilege, I didn't do anything to deserve the racism either, I was born into this position and it was my ancestors who did the oppressing, not me.

"So was naming the sinking ship 'The Barak Obama' one of those quaint election jokes?"

Throughout the review I had a feeling that Yahtzee's commentary was influenced by the recent US presidential election. Seeing the above quote in the credits pretty much confirmed it.

Duo Oratar:
It is slightly hypocritical to say that white people were randomly selected to be born the most privileged people on the planet and saying we can't complain about racism against us in the same breath. Yes us being privileged is something we're born into, but so is the whole history of oppressing the blacks thing. I have every right to complain about them being racist towards whites because just as I didn't do anything to deserve the privilege, I didn't do anything to deserve the racism either, I was born into this position and it was my ancestors who did the oppressing, not me.

I totally agree with this.

And for those who say otherwise--such as Movie Bob, whose work I enjoy--I don't feel the slightest obligation to buy into Christianity's concept of Original Sin either.

And yes, they are one and the same thing. "You are guilty of 'X' because a lot of other people you never knew and probably aren't related to did 'such-and-such'!"

Nope. Not buyin' it.

I laughed my arse of at the "Oops my brain fell out again."

Andy Shandy:
Although he is definitely right about Tony Todd having an obsession with the word "cocksucker"

Clearly the game writers have been reading all of post-1994 Tom Clancy's works. You know, when Clancy turned shit and every third word of dialogue is "cocksucker", almost always immediately preceded by "that fucking".

I still have to give it to Black Ops 2 that having a character trying to start WWIII still makes him the villain despite how much the US and its allies have punished his drug selling ass in the past

finalizer:
Ah, I've been waiting for this roast with anticipation ever since the game had been released to obnoxious, undeserved praise by the larger chunk of gaming publications. Nice to see Yahtzee telling it like it is.

HOW CAN YOU SAY ITS UNDESERVED? God, why don't people understand that this game is God distilled into gold then converted into code? I rated COD:BO2 9001/10 because it was that good and not all the same game copy/pasted for the last 5 years.

Assassin Xaero:
I didn't know who it was with the bag over their head...

It was pretty easy to tell, you just have to pay attention to the cutscenes throughout the mission of Old Man Woods telling the story. It's pretty clear that "that person" didn't make it through the mission, furthermore I believe it's the cutscene just before the deed is done that David Mason says "Tell me that fat greaseball didn't do him in." to which Woods says "It didn't go down like that kid." And then you play "that part" of the mission...pretty obvious by that point who the dude with the bag on his head was. That's why I didn't go for a headshot! :3 and got a good ending for it.

OT: Given that until the last moments of the game, you're under the assumption that the main bad guy intends to use the US drones to destroy cities all over the world, killing millions of innocents, yeah, I'd say that's a good reason to consider him a terrorist rather than a freedom fighter. His desire for revenge is certainly understandable, but that doesn't excuse the mass genocide he intends to commit.

Not to say your observations about the military and their motivations are accurate, I just think you painted Menendez too sympathetically. Not much moral ambiguity in sending a massive fleet of drones to destroy LA.

...Alright, considering the types of people that live in LA, maybe there is some moral ambiguity there. *drum rimshot* :P

I feel the need to point out

I guess mentioning that wouldnt have been as funny though

Copper Zen:
"So was naming the sinking ship 'The Barak Obama' one of those quaint election jokes?"

Throughout the review I had a feeling that Yahtzee's commentary was influenced by the recent US presidential election. Seeing the above quote in the credits pretty much confirmed it.

Well, the Obama only sinks if you kinda suck at the game, funnily enough...

Honestly, I actually liked the singleplayer. It ain't outstanding, but it's worth it's 20$. And no, it is NOT the linear railroad he claims it is. It regularly is (and the early levels are just that), but not always. For example, the mission "Fallen Angels" is split in three parts. First is a combat. Linear, nothing special, but you can order two CLAWs to shoot targets. Second is a semi-stealth section as usual. BUT you can go and hide whereever you want! No, really. For example, in a dinner, I was told to wait at the entrance to hide. I ran through it and hid at the exit. Worked fine. Following that I ran to the next car instead behind a pillar as ordered. Again, it worked.
And following THAT is either a driving sequence with a linear track and two or three sidepaths every now and then - or a simple (yet rather unforgiving - miss one target and you lost - and bit boring, too) railshooter.

Also, the "semi-option Tower Defense" is actually a "FULLY OPTIONAL Realtime Strategy". Tower Defense is something ENTIRELY DIFFERENT, MY DEAR YATHZEE! (Espically considering that in three out of the five missions, you are the OFFENSE! Only ONCE you are the DEFENSE and once, you're escorting four trucks where at least one has to survive - not hard, but boring). Yes, the AI ate the soup with a fork, but at least you can count on them to shoot the target you ordered to shoot. And the fact that you can take over a guy and go nuts yourself gives it a nice change, allowing you to pull of things you couldn't do just as commander.

And yes, he left out 2/3 of the game (Multiplayer as usual and Zombie Mode), which no matter as what you see his videos (Review or whatever), it kind of makes it pointless in that regards when he didn't even bother to play more than half the game.

Note for the Stealth suit - it works, if you keep some distance and aren't shooting. The enemies see you the same way you see them. So, obviously they shoot you if you turn that thing on and then hold up a big, red arrow over your head saying "SHOOT HERE, PLEASE!"

ARCTIC_EAGLE:
Wow, worst review EVER! Any professional review would give this game, the most amazing in history, a 90-100 or 4/5. Every single part of this game is new and interesting and amazing, you're inability to recognize that demonstrates how bad you are at reviewing. When COD:B03 comes out in 2 years you can correct you mistake by giving it a 90-100 like every other reviewer will. Be sure to do the same for COD:MW4, COD:MW5, COD:BO4, COD:MW6, etc. They will ALL be amazing and look amazing and just be more amazing then the amazingly amazing game that came before. In fact they'll be so amazing they'll amaze you into an amazement coma of amazement.

I hate the fact that I'm gonna be the one to break it to you but...

A lot of people are getting sick of spunkgargleweewee. The bubble's about to burst. The only reason reviewers give them high scores is cause they get paid for them. BTW Santa ain't real.

i like how zero punctuation for a big game like Call of Duty or Halo comes out about a week or two so after the game in question comes out, hence meaning his opinion and critique on the game falls on ether deaf ears because they already played the game or never were going to anyways.

i also wonder why that is and who's causing it. both it being the work of yahtzee or the escapist seem equally likely, although i'm pretty sure if it's yahtzee who causes these games to be reviewed so late after release it's likely for him having a fucked up crazy schedule and nothing else.

and obviously i have nothing to say about the escapist staff at all nor am i implying anything. those guys sure are great. totally not sold ou-*is shot by an assassin before i can finish my sentence*

I don't want to say this game has a special appeal to Southerners, but Tony Tod does seem to be a little bit Dicksy.

Duo Oratar:
It is slightly hypocritical to say that white people were randomly selected to be born the most privileged people on the planet and saying we can't complain about racism against us in the same breath. Yes us being privileged is something we're born into, but so is the whole history of oppressing the blacks thing. I have every right to complain about them being racist towards whites because just as I didn't do anything to deserve the privilege, I didn't do anything to deserve the racism either, I was born into this position and it was my ancestors who did the oppressing, not me.

Yes never mind that you continue to profit off a system that continues to oppress and exploit them and use any excuse you can think of to keep them from becoming equals.

Kinda surprised. I was expecting Yahtzee to praise the game for doing something a little different for a change (the ability to change the outcome based on actions taken) then completely ripping it for not going far enough (as there are only really 3 or 4 key missions that determine how your game ends).

ARCTIC_EAGLE:
Wow, worst review EVER! Any professional review would give this game, the most amazing in history, a 90-100 or 4/5. Every single part of this game is new and interesting and amazing, you're inability to recognize that demonstrates how bad you are at reviewing. When COD:B03 comes out in 2 years you can correct you mistake by giving it a 90-100 like every other reviewer will. Be sure to do the same for COD:MW4, COD:MW5, COD:BO4, COD:MW6, etc. They will ALL be amazing and look amazing and just be more amazing then the amazingly amazing game that came before. In fact they'll be so amazing they'll amaze you into an amazement coma of amazement.

image

OT: No surprises here, the last COD game I really enjoyed was MW2, I tried my brother's version of MW3 but got bored once I'd got past the London level. Liked the political rant too :-D

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