That (Also) Almost Happened

 Pages 1 2 NEXT
 

That (Also) Almost Happened

For every bad movie that sees the silver screen, there's dozens more that (thankfully) never get the green light.

Read Full Article

I kinda want to see how Aronofsky would have handled Batman. I mean, yeah, it does sound pretty strange but there's some real potential in there... even with Miller involved.

Damn, that JP script could have possibly been the best 'so bad it's good' movie of all time. It would have been a Shlocktober episode waiting to happen.

Hang on, did you just refer to 2007 as "seven years ago"? Because, um... yeah.

I would have watched that Batman v. Superman...it sounds alright to me.

Dino-Wars, I'd watch that too, but by the time it got to the genetically engineered humanoid dinosaur squad, I couldn't see this as some straight to DVD release.

Captcha says it's nap time, by the way. Lights out, everyone!

Whatever Frank Miller was on when writing that script, I want some!

The Jurassic Park one sounds moronic. I could see it as a one-off episode on a Saturday morning cartoon, but, as a full length film set in the existing universe, it would have been ridiculous.

On a different note, I kinda liked Superman Returns. Maybe I'm not enough of a fanatic to see problems in the minutia, but I don't think it deserves the scorn that was heaped on it. I stand waiting to be corrected by those who know more than me.

It's always interesting to see what could have been... I think some of these ideas might work... preferably with a considerable amount of retooling.

Steve the Pocket:
Hang on, did you just refer to 2007 as "seven years ago"? Because, um... yeah.

I saw that to, and actually started doing the math a little.

OT: I think the Dino-Wars movie would have been a good (funny) movie though if they tried to play it straight it would be even more of a comedy. though something tells me if it ever made it to production it would have received a name change to not be "Jurassic Park".

Man, j-e-f-f-e-r-s would have loved that Batman movie...

that JP one, I'd have watched it, just cause of how stupid it sounds.

image
The Jurassic Park script sounds like the best idea for "Dinosaurs for Hire" I ever heard!

... Anyone read the comic or play the game? Anyone?

No film project is ever really "dead" it seems so go ahead and keep up hope for your favorites here.

Jurassic Park should have ended at two. T-Rex as Godzilla really killed The Lost World for me, aside from the not really that good adaptation from the book. The third one, consisting of book passages that ended on the cutting-room floor when writing the other scripts, was better as a movie but in my mind utterly unnecessesary. Plus, they had to include the "yeah, now we know dinosaurs are alive" bit due to Rexilla from the previous one. This script just jumps the shark so far it's a speck in the middle of an endless ocean. Phew, that was a close one.

This is the first time I can remember (in a long time, anyway) that I read a movie description on the internet, did a double-take, then went back and re-read the same paragraph at least two more times to make sure I actually saw what I thought I saw.

Dino Commandos. Okaaay.

Maybe Michael Bay should have nabbed that as an origin story for TMNT. It'd be less destructive to the lore than what he came up with.

I thought Frank Marshall stated that the "dinosaurs with guns" concept was just a rumor.

moviebob:
The premise? In an alleged attempt to counteract a growing wild dinosaur epidemic, a mercenary is hired to retrieve that Burma Shave can full of stolen dino embryos Dennis Nedry died trying to spirit out of the original Jurassic Park. But instead of merely making domesticated population-thinning predators, a shadowy corporate agency breeds a team of super-intelligent, partially-human dinosauroid creatures genetically modified and trained to use weapons and tactical gear as part of a Dinosaur Commando Team ... who are then dispatched on a big, James Bond-esque "save the world" adventure.

... I honestly have nothing to add to that.

What about your American flag trench-coat samurai? He could be the leader.

Trishbot:
image
The Jurassic Park script sounds like the best idea for "Dinosaurs for Hire" I ever heard!

... Anyone read the comic or play the game? Anyone?

No, but I remember watching The Terrible Thunder Lizards as a kid.

OT: That and the Batman vs. Superman movie actually sounded pretty cool, depending on how they played out. Jeff Goldblum as The Scarecrow sounds really cool for some reason, although maybe it's just because the guy who played him in Batman Begins kind of looked like a young Jeff Goldblum. Anyone ever see Earth Girls Are Easy?

How did Dino Wars not happen?! Good lord, this is the kind of revelation that makes me really wish I could jump into alternate realities because that's the kind of idea that would have made iMax really seem worth it! (no offense to Avatar, Tron Legacy, Wreck-it-Ralph, etc). Hey, maybe if the Justice League movie doesn't tank we'll see another attempt at World's Finest!

Jeff Goldbum as Scarecrow?
Dinosaurs in tactical gear?
Live-action Batman Beyond?

Oh you, cruel, cruel universe!

Awww, I wanted to see Dinosaur Expendables!

Dirty Apple:
The Jurassic Park one sounds moronic. I could see it as a one-off episode on a Saturday morning cartoon, but, as a full length film set in the existing universe, it would have been ridiculous.

Is that so? How about a 65-episode Saturday morning cartoon series?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9dKJtjk36u8

Not sure how people embed video here.

Bob - did you ever cover the Orson Welles Batman pitch document? I remember it being out there - though it may have been a hoax. They had a review of it on Entertainment Weekly awhile ago. But yes - Orson Welles wanted to make Batman in the 50's. It was something already pretty well grounded in his background in radio, so it wasn't too far fetched.

Out of all of them, I think I would like to see Jurassic Park 4 the most. Just as long as there were two squads of commando dinosaurs that got to fight each other at the end.

As MovieBob said, the Ninja Turtles were originally "aliens" in their first incarnation. It was only until their popular TV show did the mutated turtles thing take off. It's not a twist... it's a step backwards...

Quiotu:

Dirty Apple:
The Jurassic Park one sounds moronic. I could see it as a one-off episode on a Saturday morning cartoon, but, as a full length film set in the existing universe, it would have been ridiculous.

Is that so? How about a 65-episode Saturday morning cartoon series?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9dKJtjk36u8

Not sure how people embed video here.

I loved that show as a kid. Hurray for the 80s.

Im not a TMNT's nerd, I watched the show a little as a kid but not much... however, I hope all involved in that script get a nut/nipple caught in a car door. Nothing permanent, just a few seconds of immense pain to make up for the shattered childhoods.

kburns10:
Whatever Frank Miller was on when writing that script, I want some!

I have a theory about what went wrong in Miller's mind: one night he's watching a film-noir marathon (either on TCM, IFC, or on of those kind of channels) and he's got all the lights off in the room to set the right mood. Then, nature calls and he gets up to answer it, but he trips over his coffee table in a manner that also bashes him in the head, with the movies still playing an dit sunconciously seeps in. And he wets himself.
SO there you have it: severe head injury and the smell of piss.

So it would've been 'Batman' via the movie Taxi Driver?

Riiight. Time for your medication Mr Miller!

Steve the Pocket:
Hang on, did you just refer to 2007 as "seven years ago"? Because, um... yeah.

Me too, that made me go 0.o a bit.

OT: I want the JP4 movie!

Quiotu:

Dirty Apple:
The Jurassic Park one sounds moronic. I could see it as a one-off episode on a Saturday morning cartoon, but, as a full length film set in the existing universe, it would have been ridiculous.

Is that so? How about a 65-episode Saturday morning cartoon series?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9dKJtjk36u8

Not sure how people embed video here.

Wow, just, wow. I've never even heard of Dinosaucers. It looks quite silly to me now, but 12 year old me would have thought it was magnificent. Thank you for expanding my horizons.

My god... I'm not sure which is more crazy the fact they almost made that Jurassic Park movie or the fact I almost certainly would have paid money to see it. Sure it would almost certainly suck but it would have been spectacular at the same time.

I wouldn't mind a live-action Batman Beyond movie; but if they're going to do it, they need to do it before Clint Eastwood gets too old to play Bruce Wayne.

If that JP scrip had happened, I would have started cutting myself.

Trishbot:
image
The Jurassic Park script sounds like the best idea for "Dinosaurs for Hire" I ever heard!

... Anyone read the comic or play the game? Anyone?

Yes, and might I add that, that game was AWESOME, I loved playing that with my brother or cousin, hell it's one of the few things that could get me and my older brother to shut up and not constantly fight.

In fact I think I should go pay my uncle a visit and see if he still has our old Genesis and our games...

 Pages 1 2 NEXT

Reply to Thread

Log in or Register to Comment
Have an account? Login below:
With Facebook:Login With Facebook
or
Username:  
Password:  
  
Not registered? To sign up for an account with The Escapist:
Register With Facebook
Register With Facebook
or
Registered for a free account here