Zero Punctuation: Far Cry 3

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I lost my shit at the rosebush. I thought the whole thing was relaxing, the colors are vibrant and I like islands.

What he said in Black Ops 2, made me *so* depressed, that it made me want to stop helping people, because nothing I can say or do will redeem myself for being "born lucky", or for the sins of someone else of the past. So Mr. Croshaw is telling me, he will hate me forever, because I wasn't born black or whatever, and he will continue to insult me for that.

Remus:
We have no cassowarys here. Is it still a holiday if I just flambe'd a pheasant?

We've got cassowaries here, I send you a leg.

It's amazing that Yahtzee did not make a Charlie Sheen reference when it came to the tiger blood part.

angel85:
ha ha ha, I never heard of a game where a random tiger can come in and essentially do a mission for you. That sounds awesome but I'm guessing you can't count on it...or can you? Maybe if you were willing to wait for several hours on a rock outcropping eventually a randomly generated tiger will just come in and eat everyone so you don't have to fire a single shot...I wonder if there's an achievement for that.

The more likely outcome generally is that the tiger decides you are the more tasty of the two options.

All I know is it's a "Far Cry" from being a good game heh.(Someone had to say it.)

I kept thinking about whether or not I should get this game, and this might just have bumped me over the fence :}

Maybe there is no good ending?

That would make some people mad I guess, but it would be interesting to explore.

Kargathia:

angel85:
ha ha ha, I never heard of a game where a random tiger can come in and essentially do a mission for you. That sounds awesome but I'm guessing you can't count on it...or can you? Maybe if you were willing to wait for several hours on a rock outcropping eventually a randomly generated tiger will just come in and eat everyone so you don't have to fire a single shot...I wonder if there's an achievement for that.

The more likely outcome generally is that the tiger decides you are the more tasty of the two options.

Maybe you can lure a mob of them into the facility and then hang glide to freedom?

I'd play that game.

Sooooooo...
is the game good or is it just good compared to blops 2? Yahtzee wasn't entirely clear on that.

Just kidding... mostly

I am actually pretty intrigued by the title but I can only wistfully sigh as my laptop would probably melt by the mere attempt to run it and I don't have access to any recent gen consoles right now.

Well that does it. I was already considering buying this game, but my large pile of backlogged games made me hesitant.

But when a Yahtzee review states that a game is fun right off the bat, you can expect to be entertained. Curse you, ZP. Still, I probably won't be able to get around to playing Far Cry 3 for quite some time. Woe is me, right?

Cecilthedarkknight_234:

jehk:
I really am the only person who hated this game. I've never played a modern military shooter so maybe this is good by comparison. Skyrim with guns this game is not.

No that would be fallout 3/newvegas with mods

True that. I was suckered in thinking this game would be more like those. Oh well.

The most important thing about driving is to remember that bridge guard rails are destructible. Especially when driving that South African Golf, because it handles like... um... a South African Golf.

GunsmithKitten:

Anyway, I'm just glad that he didn't take the racism angle with this one like some folks in the forum did.

Yeah, seriously. It's kind of funny that military shooters get condemned as Mein-Kampf racial power fantasies because they have Third World terrorists as the villains, but the game where you play a white middle-class college douchebag who ends up (over the course of a week or so) becoming a mythical warrior-king leading the oppressed natives in revolt and nailing a dusky-eyed island hottie doesn't merit a batted eyelash.

The game does sound good, though. And here I thought I'd have some breathing space to work on my unfinished games backlog.

Dammit, Yahtzee, you charismatic stallion! >.<

If you want to get back in shape (of hating stuff) you can reach for the most obscure of methods: play a J-RPG or the newest Mario game. It's guaranteed to "lighten" up your spirits.

Although it might be classified as BDSM or torture, providing this question might change the classification to philosophical dilemma: Which one of the above is it?

jehk:
I really am the only person who hated this game. I've never played a modern military shooter so maybe this is good by comparison. Skyrim with guns this game is not.

I actually think that is a very inaccurate comparison, the only thing they have in common is the open world-ness, the wildlife, and the clearing of enemy strongholds. It doesn't go on forever the way Skyrim has the potential too, after all the missions the only thing to do is really play games like poker and knife throwing or just drive around killing animals and an occasional enemy. Great game, but a horrible comparison by far.

First time I've disagreed with Yahtzee in a while. I thought it was alright too, but more "...alright" then just regular 'alright'. The side content is shallow and repetitive beyond the hunting which I liked but doesn't last. And the story is pretentious and haphazard. The releases at the start of this year were more starved than ever and I have a feeling that's contributing to Yahtzee looking at everything a little more kindly. Or maybe it's because I don't play boring modern shooters.

Cannot get... image of... Yahtzee pole-dancing... out of... my head!

Keith Fraser:
So it's a sandbox game involving stealthy combat, with a dark and cynical character arc? Somehow I'm not surprised Yahtzee liked it. If jetpacks were involved he'd probably proclaim it Game of the Year. :P

(Also, is it just me or does the plot sound a lot like that of the upcoming new Tomb Raider, except with a guy instead of a girl?)

OH, it gets pretty outright tomb raidery for one section. Probably my personal low point for the game (Where it forces you into straight up fighting pirates who're somehow in a sealed temple you just unsealed, ahead of you)

I think all these shitty modern military shooters have started to rotten peoples brains, or maybe the standards are now so low that this game can somehow be considered to be a great. Maybe I'm wrong but all I see when I look at FC3 is a mediocre snoozefest, with all the typical bad gameplay, boring missions, sloppy leveldesign, unimaginative weapons, lame enemies, no challenge, no depth and much of the other typical awfulness you come to expect from todays fps games. Sure, some parts of the game doesn't look as bad as you might expect but that still doesn't make something great, it only makes it somewhat better compared to crap like MW3.

Roving Rambo death machine sounds like a fun game premise.

Someone tell Jim Sterling that apparently, bananas CAN review video games.

Jeez. Think I might start completing games before watching ZP from now on =/

I'm roughly 7 or 8 Radio Towers into the game, and I'm really enjoying it so far. ...I never played any of the previous FarCry games, but I'm glad that I'm playing this one. The one complaint I have about the game so far, is this: shuffling through the menu & inventory, it feels cumbersome -- at least the game prompts you when you've acquired the materials needed to craft something!

I liked FC3, however -

Two things would have fixed the problems Yahtzee mentioned and made it better:

1. Make it so you can't get to certain main-quest areas without liberating the enemy outposts in your path. It's ridiculous that you can get a new quest located in an area surrounded by enemy outposts and then be able to "quick-travel" there.
2. More skills/abilities or make them harder to achieve. Leveling up was too quick. When I finished the game I hadn't been to half the map and had liberated about 1/3 of outposts and radio towers, yet I had all the skills.

Vaas should have been the main villain. I think the developers completed the storyline and realized it was too short and so tacked on a higher-up guy who was less interesting.

I have been teetering on the fence about buying fc3,
mostly because I have several other games already on my buy list. not to mention I am still getting a lot of entertainment from skyrim and it seems a bit silly to buy another sandbox when I am still playing skyrim.

also I disagree with the banana thing I think its just his popularty and awesomness showing
pretty much everyone I meet who plays video games knows about yatzee so I think hes just starting to effect stuff

Am I getting old or was this the most positive ZP review ever (since HL)?

Quality review! One day I might actually give this game a chance...

Casual Shinji:

canadamus_prime:

Casual Shinji:

It's not just a thought, it's full blown duo on a magic carpet.

image

...what? What is that from?

Alfred Jodocus Kwak

A Dutch/Japanese cartoon from the late 80's about a duck named Alfred who gets into all kinds of political, racial, and environmental situations. It even has Hitler as a crow.

Never heard of it. Sounds wacky though.

I wasn't really all that hyped on this game when it was first announced, but now I must say that it is definetely on my wishlist.

Yahtzee : "I'm a Banana."
My first thought

Hah, I can't decide if I like Yahtzee's reviews better when he loathes the game or when he likes it. He may have to crank up the hatred soon or people will start complaining.

BloodRed Pixel:
Am I getting old or was this the most positive ZP review ever (since HL)?

Well, 'since Half Life' maybe, but his most positive review by far was Psychonauts.

Wow guy, thanks for spoiling major plot details and such.

Good review though.

Elois:

gardian06:
[quote="Andy Shandy" post="6.395870.16103221"]

what?, how? NOOOOOOOOOO.
I can see why they were never aired, and I wouldn't be surprised if these contract creators wanted their money back if retainers were given.

They aren't really rejected cartoons, this is a story written by Don about a fictional Don who crashes and burns as a cartoonist. Supposedly it symbolizes the end of his era or something.

Yeah, there's a weird kind of genius to it, once you watch the whole thing. Or, at least, there's just enough there to give the illusion of a cohesive theme, though it'd probably take a couple viewings to parse it all out.

Surely if you choose to go back to civilisation you become Green Arrow, no?

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