Zero Punctuation: The Cave

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The Cave

This week, Zero Punctuation reviews The Cave.

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I still have the hillbilly left, but why the bloody buggers would I play it just for him? Meh..

Youtube ahoy!

Best ending for a fair while, and yes stalactites are the one's on the ceiling correct.

I don't like the idea of having to play it through so many times just to get all the levels...

After watching this, I am very tempted to pick up The Dig and Grim Fandango again.

I guess Double Fine can't make a great game every time.

Roofstone:
I still have the hillbilly left, but why the bloody buggers would I play it just for him? Meh..

Youtube ahoy!

Youtube! my favourite friend when I am to board or busy to finish a game.
"Red Dead" I just couldn't find the time or will

I always hate it when games force you to play through the games again to get a different ending. An example that comes to mind is Shadow the Hedgehog in which you had to play the game I don't know how many times and then had to do both the good, bad and neutral ending each time. Was quite irritating.

Regarding stalactites, here's a way to remember: Stalagmites have an M in them, just like pyramids which they sort of look like. And pyramids are on the ground; so the ones with the M are on the ground, too. That leaves stalactites for the ceiling.

For some reason in this review Yahtzee sounds like Owen from the Vicar of Dibley https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IQCtzx0NE24&feature=player_detailpage#t=5s

If I wanted a story based on sins that had alternate endings and characters with unique skills, I'd rewatch Fullmetal Alchemist.

castlewise:
For some reason in this review Yahtzee sounds like Owen from the Vicar of Dibley https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IQCtzx0NE24&feature=player_detailpage#t=5s

She included random jokes at the end of her videos to.

This episode was refreshingly good. Not compared to other ZP episodes, I don't mean; compared to the other features on the Escapist of recent times *cough*Jimfuckingquistion*cough*

Oh well

At least now we can wait for him to review Lost Plane-, I mean Dead Space 3

Skeleon:
Regarding stalactites, here's a way to remember: Stalagmites have an M in them, just like pyramids which they sort of look like. And pyramids are on the ground; so the ones with the M are on the ground, too. That leaves stalactites for the ceiling.

Holding a handstand all day takes might, hanging requires holding on tight.

Actually, you would only have to play it 5 times to get all the endings for all the characters...

Proof: 7 characters times 2 endings is 14 total variations. you can only pick 3 characters each playthrough. 14 divided by 3 is about 4.6, which means you need a minimum of 5 playthroughs (with one character having to be played a third time). Essentially the way it would work is if by the third time you play, you pick a character to get the first ending, then the other two characters that are being repeated go off to get the second ending...

Five playthroughs is still four bloody times too many. =/

Neronium:
I always hate it when games force you to play through the games again to get a different ending. An example that comes to mind is Shadow the Hedgehog in which you had to play the game I don't know how many times and then had to do both the good, bad and neutral ending each time. Was quite irritating.

Oh god it's something like 24 times if you insist on a full playthrough for each ending. Still, I enjoyed thast game, as shameful as that is.

OT: Demo was okay, kinda dull, not very taxing in it's puzzles so I'll be passing. At least it wasn;t like Stacking where I genuinely reached a point where FAQ's held not the answer and my brain was mush.

Y U NO FTL??

At this point, it feels like he's just teasing us with its possible review.

Angel Molina:
Actually, you would only have to play it 5 times to get all the endings for all the characters...

Proof: 7 characters times 2 endings is 14 total variations. you can only pick 3 characters each playthrough. 14 divided by 3 is about 4.6, which means you need a minimum of 5 playthroughs (with one character having to be played a third time). Essentially the way it would work is if by the third time you play, you pick a character to get the first ending, then the other two characters that are being repeated go off to get the second ending...

Five playthroughs is still four bloody times too many. =/

And that's only if you knew there were multiple endings before finishing the third run..

I really hate those guide dang it situations in video games where you have to have psychic powers to get the good ending.

If you want to play some good modern lucasarts adventure game I advice the sam and max episodic games there funny and have some really clever puzzles.

although in the third season the controls are pretty bad.

snave:

Skeleon:
Regarding stalactites, here's a way to remember: Stalagmites have an M in them, just like pyramids which they sort of look like. And pyramids are on the ground; so the ones with the M are on the ground, too. That leaves stalactites for the ceiling.

Holding a handstand all day takes might, hanging requires holding on tight.

Stalactites tumble, while stalagmites are mounted to the floor.

Skeleon:
Regarding stalactites, here's a way to remember: Stalagmites have an M in them, just like pyramids which they sort of look like. And pyramids are on the ground; so the ones with the M are on the ground, too. That leaves stalactites for the ceiling.

snave:
Holding a handstand all day takes might, hanging requires holding on tight.

I always use:

The 'mites go up when the 'tights come down.

image

This was probably the best review in months. I was laughing my ass off non stop.

I had to rewatch this one three times in a row. That doesn't happen very often. XD

Yes, I put my dildo in my "velvet-lined dildo case" too. What? Why is everybody looking at me funny?

Dirty Apple:
Y U NO FTL??

At this point, it feels like he's just teasing us with its possible review.

But then again, he did give it an EP text review, as he did with The Binding of Isaac. But as we all know, ZP is centered around disappointment, hatred, and unexpected joy.

Speaking of disappointment regarding a beloved developer attempting to bring back a game that should be similar to that developer's game that Yatzee really liked, this review reminded me of the Quantum Conundrum review halfway through.

So all all I've learned in this thread is people have terrible ways of remembering stalactites versus stalagmites. Stalactites have a C for Ceiling, Stalagmites are G for ground. Tada.

Yahtzee's always at his best when he's acknowledging his own sexual inadequacies.

Like a key and a door
A Banana and a monkey
And a dildo into a...
*silence*
*silence*
"velvet-lined dildo case"

Cracked me up big time :D

Skeleon:
Regarding stalactites, here's a way to remember: Stalagmites have an M in them, just like pyramids which they sort of look like. And pyramids are on the ground; so the ones with the M are on the ground, too. That leaves stalactites for the ceiling.

Umm, wouldn't it have been easier just to say stalactite has a "C" like ceiling instead of saddleing the horse from the wrong end ?
And no, not THOSE horses ! :P

Is this based off the cave legend itself or no? just curious.

Dirty Apple:
Y U NO FTL??

At this point, it feels like he's just teasing us with its possible review.

Here, give this a read.

OT: Lots of really funny analogies in this one, good show. Didn't know anything about this game, but I'm not particularly interested in puzzle-platformers and it sounds like it's missing the Double Fine charm people always ascribe to their games, so I guess it's just as well that I've got no interest in it.

Stalactites cling tight to the ceiling.
Stalagmites might grow out of the ground. Thank you, Sam & Max.

Tights fall down. That how I remember it. Thank you Simon Lane.

I can believe Yahtzee's sex involves dressing a dwarf up as Mr. Darcy and roleplaying out a Flintstones fetish.

Kayweg:
Umm, wouldn't it have been easier just to say stalactite has a "C" like ceiling instead of saddleing the horse from the wrong end ?
And no, not THOSE horses ! :P

No, because "ceiling" doesn't have a C in it in German.
Actually, shit, it does. "Decke". Nevermind, just add it I guess.

Skeleon:
Regarding stalactites, here's a way to remember: Stalagmites have an M in them, just like pyramids which they sort of look like. And pyramids are on the ground; so the ones with the M are on the ground, too. That leaves stalactites for the ceiling.

EDIT: Ninja'd

I didn't realise there where good endings either. Though the biggest disappointment with The Cave was the lack of dialogue for the main characters, it takes a lot from what good have been an interesting dynamic between the different characters.

Falseprophet:

snave:

Skeleon:
Regarding stalactites, here's a way to remember: Stalagmites have an M in them, just like pyramids which they sort of look like. And pyramids are on the ground; so the ones with the M are on the ground, too. That leaves stalactites for the ceiling.

Holding a handstand all day takes might, hanging requires holding on tight.

Stalactites tumble, while stalagmites are mounted to the floor.

Stalactites for the top, Stalagmites must be below.

I really liked The Cave. I saw it as an unofficial sequence to The Lost Vikings. It's visually beautiful, the characters are funny enough, and it is a continuous experience: no loading screens (except for the first time your game is loaded), no quest dialogs, no inventories, no side quests, just you and the game.

Is it a full adventure game? No. Is it fun? yes, and I definitely will play it sometime in the future.

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