Top 5 Friday: Top 5 Worst Videogame Romances

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Not funny, and kind of homophobic. Why is this show on EscapistMagazine, my favourite website?

Gregory Wollf:
So if someone is against same sex marriage we call them a homophobe. If someone is against cross species marriage we call them a xenophobe. What do we call someone who is against human / robot marriage... and isn't it the same thing as the other two? If you're all about fair sexual preference then what's wrong with Joker and Edi? For that matter, what's wrong with pacman and pacman? Your position makes no sense.

I couldn't agree more. Joshua is a 'creeped out' by Joker and Edi because she hasn't got lady bits? Two characters loving each other enough that physical satisfaction just doesn't seem as important, and this is somehow unromantic? And yeah, what is wrong with pacman and pacman? PacLove power, people!!

Gunjester:

Gregory Wollf:
So if someone is against same sex marriage we call them a homophobe. If someone is against cross species marriage we call them a xenophobe. What do we call someone who is against human / robot marriage... and isn't it the same thing as the other two? If you're all about fair sexual preference then what's wrong with Joker and Edi? For that matter, what's wrong with pacman and pacman? Your position makes no sense.

Cross-species marriage is still a biological relationship, so human/robot marriage/love - especially if you believe in souls - is essentially masturbation but with an interactive object. If you fall in love with a robot you're loving the illusion of a personality and essentially sleeping with a hyper-advanced sex-doll. Once again if you believe in souls and their connection to love, it's only real love if there's a connection in souls so...yeah...

Anyways, as for pacman and ms. pacman, although Dorkly made the drag joke before and Robot Chicken already pointed this out with the Disney crew, it's just sexual narcissism, not a regular same-sex union.

And he said he was cool with same-sex marriage, he never said he wasn't a xenophobe or a robophobe or whatever.

Yes but in the same sense that homophobia is totally not on, it would seem that plenty of people on this forum (such as I) have a problem with xenophobes and robophobes (I love this word) as well.

I didn't quite follow your comment on Pacman but I'd prefer to address Mass Effect. As you say, dualists (people who believe in souls, as distinct from physical bodies) would likely share your expressed view of human-robot relationships. But a monist (such as whoever wrote the whole biotic-synthetic integration plot of ME3) would genuinely ask whether EDI is a person and whether she is really so incapable of romance.

Escapist, just pull the plug on those guys. This is a "Games-are-art-hippie" side, not a "mainstream" no-depth IGN side. Half the hobby "Listmakers" on Youtube do a better job than this guys.

Friv:

ZexionSephiroth:
Guys, I hate to say it, but I think Romance is dead.

... And it's not coming back from the grave until we learn exactly what it is we personally need out of our relationships before we pursue them.

Me? I need a girl who can keep me pointed in the right direction. Some kind of leader. One with awe inspiring confidence and determination, and is able to inspire it in me. Preferably able to lead from both the commander's tent and from the head of the army, as a great general and Warrior. And in return, I will be her most Loyal Knight, performing whatever duties she requires of me, and for the most part, working alongside her in the thick of whatever we strive towards.

...

... Doubt that will actually happen though. Regardless of if we're talking metaphorical or Literal...

That stuff just refuses to fly.

Allow me to politely suggest that the problem here may not be with Romance.

...Well, for me the problem isn't romance. But with everyone else, there seems to be problems in that regard.

With me, I suppose I over romanticize the role that my ideal partner would play. But at the same time, it's something I can't change because of the simple fact that even after striping it back a lot, I'm still left needing a partner who is a Leader to make up for my critical lack of direction. And that is something few people seem to have inside them.

It's strange that through an intimate understanding of what makes romance work I seem to have come to the conclusion that I'm going to be forever alone.

While on the other hand, everyone who doesn't understand the core concept of two people playing a much needed role to further each other, and its place in romance... are doomed to have a large number of meaningless relationships.

Go figure.

Liara and Shephard.

By virtue of not wanting to bone Biotic McPoopy pants or the ship's resident racist I was left with the virginal doe eyed "merely a child by our standards." blue space chick who of course is just super into me for...reasons.

Bleh.

I disagree with Pac-man. Not necessarily for its place on the list, but why you said it is.

Ms. Pac-man is in fact female. After all, they had kids together. Problem comes with the fact that Ms. Pac-man is abusive. And you can clearly see how it takes its toll on the former hero in Pacman 2: The New Adventures.

How awkward.
This was an unfunny, dumb mess.

ZexionSephiroth:

Friv:

ZexionSephiroth:
Guys, I hate to say it, but I think Romance is dead.

... And it's not coming back from the grave until we learn exactly what it is we personally need out of our relationships before we pursue them.

Me? I need a girl who can keep me pointed in the right direction. Some kind of leader. One with awe inspiring confidence and determination, and is able to inspire it in me. Preferably able to lead from both the commander's tent and from the head of the army, as a great general and Warrior. And in return, I will be her most Loyal Knight, performing whatever duties she requires of me, and for the most part, working alongside her in the thick of whatever we strive towards.

...

... Doubt that will actually happen though. Regardless of if we're talking metaphorical or Literal...

That stuff just refuses to fly.

Allow me to politely suggest that the problem here may not be with Romance.

...Well, for me the problem isn't romance. But with everyone else, there seems to be problems in that regard.

With me, I suppose I over romanticize the role that my ideal partner would play. But at the same time, it's something I can't change because of the simple fact that even after striping it back a lot, I'm still left needing a partner who is a Leader to make up for my critical lack of direction. And that is something few people seem to have inside them.

It's strange that through an intimate understanding of what makes romance work I seem to have come to the conclusion that I'm going to be forever alone.

While on the other hand, everyone who doesn't understand the core concept of two people playing a much needed role to further each other, and its place in romance... are doomed to have a large number of meaningless relationships.

Go figure.

I can only speak for personal experience. However... the ways in which people can compliment and balance out one another are not always the ways that you initially expect, and while not every (or even most) relationship lasts for life, the fact of romance is not made weaker for that fact, and a non-permanent relationship is not the same as a meaningless one. The people that we are with change us, and you might find that someone who pushes you to gain direction could prove to be as valuable a romantic partner as one who leads you.

More importantly, when I look at the people I know, I see an ever-growing number of them falling into relationships that last, and that make them both happy, content, and balanced with one another. I don't see romance dying, I see it thriving.

Is it possible that you have simply reached a stage of life faster than most of your fellows, and are growing cynical waiting for them to catch up? I don't know how old you are, but I have to admit that I'm kind of assuming "early to mid twenties", if only because you sound like me five years ago. ;)

Friv:

ZexionSephiroth:

Friv:

Allow me to politely suggest that the problem here may not be with Romance.

...Well, for me the problem isn't romance. But with everyone else, there seems to be problems in that regard.

With me, I suppose I over romanticize the role that my ideal partner would play. But at the same time, it's something I can't change because of the simple fact that even after striping it back a lot, I'm still left needing a partner who is a Leader to make up for my critical lack of direction. And that is something few people seem to have inside them.

It's strange that through an intimate understanding of what makes romance work I seem to have come to the conclusion that I'm going to be forever alone.

While on the other hand, everyone who doesn't understand the core concept of two people playing a much needed role to further each other, and its place in romance... are doomed to have a large number of meaningless relationships.

Go figure.

I can only speak for personal experience. However... the ways in which people can compliment and balance out one another are not always the ways that you initially expect, and while not every (or even most) relationship lasts for life, the fact of romance is not made weaker for that fact, and a non-permanent relationship is not the same as a meaningless one. The people that we are with change us, and you might find that someone who pushes you to gain direction could prove to be as valuable a romantic partner as one who leads you.

More importantly, when I look at the people I know, I see an ever-growing number of them falling into relationships that last, and that make them both happy, content, and balanced with one another. I don't see romance dying, I see it thriving.

Is it possible that you have simply reached a stage of life faster than most of your fellows, and are growing cynical waiting for them to catch up? I don't know how old you are, but I have to admit that I'm kind of assuming "early to mid twenties", if only because you sound like me five years ago. ;)

I'm about 19... So you're pretty close.

Anyways, I suppose you're right to say I'm cynical about these things. I feel like I reached a point ages ago where I started to expect proper relationships to be more than just... Whatever it is that people around here are doing when they go out to clubs and gum on each-others mouths.

And somehow, everyone else my age, give or take a year is doing pretty much that: Going out with Girls or Guys just for the carnal experience, or just cause they're friends in some cases. (I've seen a few relationships that look less like love and more like two Best Friends from looking at it.)

Anyways...

As for romantic roles, even if it ends up being something I don't expect, I hardly see it being taken up by any of the girls I've met in real life. It's hard to describe what exactly is wrong with them, but they all seem so... Young... Or Naive... Like they never experienced something that would make them stronger inside, and as such, if they actually experienced it now, they'd break.

"A heart will never be practical, until it can be made unbreakable..." -Wizard of Oz

As for the big question of how many romances I see work or fail... So far, Most of the relationships I've seen in person have rarely even qualified as a relationship, and looked more like a fling.

... Save for one guy other than me it seems... But he seems to frequently get dumped and left wondering what went wrong, while the girls he dates never seem like they cared about the relationship much. And what has he gained from these relationships? Something along the lines of learning not to let that kind of thing bother him... So at this point, he should really be looking for a different kind of relationship, but hasn't figured that out yet.

...

Actually, maybe you're right and it isn't all so clear cut as to whether romance is dead or not.

But either way, I'm still left at a point where I've matured past, or ignored the need for "puppy love" for years, and I'm waiting for one with a strong heart to come along; And yet nobody seems to have that.

Le Sigh.

Gunjester:

Cross-species marriage is still a biological relationship, so human/robot marriage/love - especially if you believe in souls - is essentially masturbation but with an interactive object. If you fall in love with a robot you're loving the illusion of a personality and essentially sleeping with a hyper-advanced sex-doll. Once again if you believe in souls and their connection to love, it's only real love if there's a connection in souls so...yeah...

I find this interesting, you say you are fine with a biological relationship, yet seem against a robotic one even though EDI is self-aware (and so is the guy in the video), but say that isn't love, if the only reason he likes characters interacting with other living characters is because they have a body, then that's objectifying them just as much, you aren't in it for the person, you just want their body.

Watched the video. Found it... ehhh. But remember, it took some time for The Big Picture to actually get on a decent track too, so we'll see in the future if this gets any better.

And the list was really lazily put together. Seriously, people complain about Mario and Peach's "relationship"? Do people complain about not having enough wrapping paper on their christmas presents too?

But what makes this list truly crappy is that there isn't A SINGLE MENTION of the bestiality romance from Sonic '06.

I've found that the usual romance set-ups in games come across as "we have a male protagonist, and a few females. We need to pair them up! For DRAMA!" Though; this model is usually applicable for other media. Especially superhero comic books.

inFAMOUS had that whole Evil Cole/Sasha thing, which came off as Cole is a good little mind-control slave to the black goop. And that is resultant from your decisions for the flawed morality system to get the powered up Chain Lightning. Then inFAMOUS 2 had two separate romance subplots, each only associated and locked into with the morality system set up, then there's an Act 3 twist where your starting the final mission pisses off the good girl if you're going for the good guy ending, or the bad girl when you're playing for evil.

It goes to the credit of game franchises like Saints Row, wherein there is no romance for the player character, that they spent more time coming up with over-the-top gameplay mechanics and missions. And even in that game, Johnny Gat and his girlfriend are still a kind of generic couple, but at least they're an interesting mix that seem to genuinely like each-other.

On Mass Effect; I'd found that the whole Jack/Male Shepard romance was a big waste in the 3rd game for the amount of effort I'd went to in order to let her know that I was looking for a deep romance. I have literally went through each of the romance set-ups for that game and the first Dragon Age, but found that most just added more characterization at best, and titillation at worst.

I thought the Joker and Edi coupling was pretty cute in Mass Effect 3. I kinda wish that FemShep and Joker could have gotten together.

Satirical or borderline discriminatory? You decide! Parts of the may as well have been prefixed with "I'm not homophobic, BUT..".

Slightly more charisma in the presenter this week, but that's saying little. Better content in a way (above-noted comment aside) but again that's saying little - better than a Top-5 FPS list, wowee! I'm weighing in with the other posters expressing my continued dislike of this new series. The standard here is just so much lower than the rest of the Escapist's usual output; it's just got this dirty, lame, dumb dudebro feel of a place like IGN or something.

Fiairflair:

Gunjester:

Gregory Wollf:
So if someone is against same sex marriage we call them a homophobe. If someone is against cross species marriage we call them a xenophobe. What do we call someone who is against human / robot marriage... and isn't it the same thing as the other two? If you're all about fair sexual preference then what's wrong with Joker and Edi? For that matter, what's wrong with pacman and pacman? Your position makes no sense.

Cross-species marriage is still a biological relationship, so human/robot marriage/love - especially if you believe in souls - is essentially masturbation but with an interactive object. If you fall in love with a robot you're loving the illusion of a personality and essentially sleeping with a hyper-advanced sex-doll. Once again if you believe in souls and their connection to love, it's only real love if there's a connection in souls so...yeah...

Anyways, as for pacman and ms. pacman, although Dorkly made the drag joke before and Robot Chicken already pointed this out with the Disney crew, it's just sexual narcissism, not a regular same-sex union.

And he said he was cool with same-sex marriage, he never said he wasn't a xenophobe or a robophobe or whatever.

Yes but in the same sense that homophobia is totally not on, it would seem that plenty of people on this forum (such as I) have a problem with xenophobes and robophobes (I love this word) as well.

I didn't quite follow your comment on Pacman but I'd prefer to address Mass Effect. As you say, dualists (people who believe in souls, as distinct from physical bodies) would likely share your expressed view of human-robot relationships. But a monist (such as whoever wrote the whole biotic-synthetic integration plot of ME3) would genuinely ask whether EDI is a person and whether she is really so incapable of romance.

If I may point out, I was merely expressing the idea of why the guy in the video thought it was creepy, I personally don't try to concern myself with human-robot relationships, I wouldn't do it myself because I'm a dualist, but I wouldn't complain about other people doing it either, especially from a literary standpoint. The only time I'd complain is if someone in my immediate family, i.e. a child of mine, ended up doing it, and I'd mostly be upset I wouldn't have proper grandchildren more than anything.

Warachia:

Gunjester:

Cross-species marriage is still a biological relationship, so human/robot marriage/love - especially if you believe in souls - is essentially masturbation but with an interactive object. If you fall in love with a robot you're loving the illusion of a personality and essentially sleeping with a hyper-advanced sex-doll. Once again if you believe in souls and their connection to love, it's only real love if there's a connection in souls so...yeah...

I find this interesting, you say you are fine with a biological relationship, yet seem against a robotic one even though EDI is self-aware (and so is the guy in the video), but say that isn't love, if the only reason he likes characters interacting with other living characters is because they have a body, then that's objectifying them just as much, you aren't in it for the person, you just want their body.

I never said it wasn't love, I said you were loving the illusion of a personality. And I was just trying to explain the mindset of the man who made the video, not necessarily express my own point of view on the subject.

Draconalis:

Gunjester:

ShirowShirow:
Yeah, it's funny. I don't think Nintendo's ever, it a quarter century, ever actually clarified Mario and Peach's relationship.

Clarified hers and Bowser's as a sexual one with at least one child...

Wait... what? Did I miss something along the way?

In Mario Sunshine, Baby Bowser reveals that Peach is his mother, she is not the least bit surprised at the accusation and never denies it, couple this with the fact that she never resists Bowser's "kidnappings" and it's clear how twisted she actually is.

Wait... Where is Sonic 06?

Yeah, 'cause valentine's day is the only hallmark holiday in the world, right? It's not like we celebrate Halloween, Christmas, Easter, St. Patrick's Day, Cinco de Mayo, or any other number of holidays just to buy things, right?

And why did you have to start so many of the explanations on the list with the phrase "Now don't get me wrong..."

Also how come all but one of your examples were deemed bad romances because of sexual reasons rather than something interesting like how the story and script itself showcased a lack of chemistry between two characters.

This list seemed more just "5 couples in games that annoy me and/or gross me out." rather than actually being bad romances.

(This is all personal opinion on the romance in games thing)
To be honest romance in games is sketchy at best because its all a little to scripted to make any real impact on a person and then there is the fact that
they aren't real people which makes it a little harder for me to get into the whole idea that these two streams of data are trying to emulate what romance is between
two beings, its just hard to fall into the idea of it when there's that huge chunk of space between the points were the characters are together, game play I think its called

Yeah, romance has never really been done well in video games, ever.

I found this to be pretty much the worst thing I've ever seen on the Escapist. It was not funny, and the failed humor just came off as offensive. It is possible to accidentally initiate a romance in Dragon Age, but the scenes do not trigger without you selecting for it to happen. So, that argument falls on it's face. There are so many worse options out there, my personal one being Morwen and Berethor from Lord of the Rings: The Third Age, which apparently no one but me played. THAT was awful.

Anyway.. this was so awful that I'm done with this show. I've really come to expect more from The Escapist.

Transphobia, huh? Never something I expected from an official Escapist video.

Gunjester:

I never said it wasn't love, I said you were loving the illusion of a personality. And I was just trying to explain the mindset of the man who made the video, not necessarily express my own point of view on the subject.

But if they are fully self aware then there is no "illusion" of a personality, it IS a personality, I stick by my point though, if he's against the relationship because EDI isn't a living thing, then he's just as shallow as the people in loving the illusion of a personality, he's not in it for them as a person, he's just interested in their body.

This episode might have worked better oh, last week. Once again a boring list and boring presentation. I like to think I speak for a majority of the oldies here so if possible: Bring back Ms. Foiles.

Friv:

ZexionSephiroth:
Guys, I hate to say it, but I think Romance is dead.

... And it's not coming back from the grave until we learn exactly what it is we personally need out of our relationships before we pursue them.

Me? I need a girl who can keep me pointed in the right direction. Some kind of leader. One with awe inspiring confidence and determination, and is able to inspire it in me. Preferably able to lead from both the commander's tent and from the head of the army, as a great general and Warrior. And in return, I will be her most Loyal Knight, performing whatever duties she requires of me, and for the most part, working alongside her in the thick of whatever we strive towards.

...

... Doubt that will actually happen though. Regardless of if we're talking metaphorical or Literal...

That stuff just refuses to fly.

Allow me to politely suggest that the problem here may not be with Romance.

I'd like to suggest hes in fact describing his ideal woman as his mother.

FREUD ALL UP IN YO GRILL!

jackdeesface:

Friv:

ZexionSephiroth:
Guys, I hate to say it, but I think Romance is dead.

... And it's not coming back from the grave until we learn exactly what it is we personally need out of our relationships before we pursue them.

Me? I need a girl who can keep me pointed in the right direction. Some kind of leader. One with awe inspiring confidence and determination, and is able to inspire it in me. Preferably able to lead from both the commander's tent and from the head of the army, as a great general and Warrior. And in return, I will be her most Loyal Knight, performing whatever duties she requires of me, and for the most part, working alongside her in the thick of whatever we strive towards.

...

... Doubt that will actually happen though. Regardless of if we're talking metaphorical or Literal...

That stuff just refuses to fly.

Allow me to politely suggest that the problem here may not be with Romance.

I'd like to suggest hes in fact describing his ideal woman as his mother.

FREUD ALL UP IN YO GRILL!

Unless of course I don't have a mother figure. In which case, there goes that theory.

I'd hate to get into Freudian issues, but my mother was never home, she was always working so I barely felt like she was my mother, my Father was always on the other side of the country, so I never felt like he was my father.

Really, at this point, I feel like instead of a Father figure I was mentored by my Brother, and instead of a mother figure, I was mentored by my cousin.

Both of which were too close to my own age to be real parental figures, so I couldn't imprint on anyone around me with the typical Mother or Father roles.

In the end... What did I get as a Male and Female Role model for how I should act, and what my partner should be like?

None!

I was emotionally Orphaned, even if I wasn't literally so. And that state persisted till... Now I guess?

So instead of a Mother of Father figure, I turned to Hero Figures instead... And considering my upbringing was full of videogames... I would up with very STRONG Hero Figures. A Pair of STRONG and Noble Knights, One Male, One Female.

... or depending on Each character's orientation; Two Females or Two Males.

...Or Many of Either! But Polygamy isn't exactly a well touted virtue.

There's also the fact that I didn't have a good relationship with my Mother or Father. I thought my mother had given up all sense of purpose and was waiting for us to leave and become independent so she could give up the last bit of motivation. While my Father had a Nihilistic view of the world.

So for your idea that my ideal woman is my mother...

... you Couldn't be more wrong.

My Ideal woman would CRUSH my Mother under the heel of her boot if she ever met her. Not that it would be a hard task though, my mother is the weakest woman I have ever had the misfortune of meeting.

And so... I must say, that Freudian stuff doesn't apply to me.

I HAVE NO MOTHER FIGURE!

ZexionSephiroth:

jackdeesface:

Friv:

Allow me to politely suggest that the problem here may not be with Romance.

I'd like to suggest hes in fact describing his ideal woman as his mother.

FREUD ALL UP IN YO GRILL!

Unless of course I don't have a mother figure. In which case, there goes that theory.

I'd hate to get into Freudian issues, but my mother was never home, she was always working so I barely felt like she was my mother, my Father was always on the other side of the country, so I never felt like he was my father.

Really, at this point, I feel like instead of a Father figure I was mentored by my Brother, and instead of a mother figure, I was mentored by my cousin.

Both of which were too close to my own age to be real parental figures, so I couldn't imprint on anyone around me with the typical Mother or Father roles.

In the end... What did I get as a Male and Female Role model for how I should act, and what my partner should be like?

None!

I was emotionally Orphaned, even if I wasn't literally so. And that state persisted till... Now I guess?

So instead of a Mother of Father figure, I turned to Hero Figures instead... And considering my upbringing was full of videogames... I would up with very STRONG Hero Figures. A Pair of STRONG and Noble Knights, One Male, One Female.

... or depending on Each character's orientation; Two Females or Two Males.

...Or Many of Either! But Polygamy isn't exactly a well touted virtue.

There's also the fact that I didn't have a good relationship with my Mother or Father. I thought my mother had given up all sense of purpose and was waiting for us to leave and become independent so she could give up the last bit of motivation. While my Father had a Nihilistic view of the world.

So for your idea that my ideal woman is my mother...

... you Couldn't be more wrong.

My Ideal woman would CRUSH my Mother under the heel of her boot if she ever met her. Not that it would be a hard task though, my mother is the weakest woman I have ever had the misfortune of meeting.

And so... I must say, that Freudian stuff doesn't apply to me.

I HAVE NO MOTHER FIGURE!

So you're saying your ideal woman is a video game character?

I'd stick with telling people its your mother, it seems healthier.

jackdeesface:

ZexionSephiroth:

jackdeesface:

I'd like to suggest hes in fact describing his ideal woman as his mother.

FREUD ALL UP IN YO GRILL!

Unless of course I don't have a mother figure. In which case, there goes that theory.

I'd hate to get into Freudian issues, but my mother was never home, she was always working so I barely felt like she was my mother, my Father was always on the other side of the country, so I never felt like he was my father.

Really, at this point, I feel like instead of a Father figure I was mentored by my Brother, and instead of a mother figure, I was mentored by my cousin.

Both of which were too close to my own age to be real parental figures, so I couldn't imprint on anyone around me with the typical Mother or Father roles.

In the end... What did I get as a Male and Female Role model for how I should act, and what my partner should be like?

None!

I was emotionally Orphaned, even if I wasn't literally so. And that state persisted till... Now I guess?

So instead of a Mother of Father figure, I turned to Hero Figures instead... And considering my upbringing was full of videogames... I would up with very STRONG Hero Figures. A Pair of STRONG and Noble Knights, One Male, One Female.

... or depending on Each character's orientation; Two Females or Two Males.

...Or Many of Either! But Polygamy isn't exactly a well touted virtue.

There's also the fact that I didn't have a good relationship with my Mother or Father. I thought my mother had given up all sense of purpose and was waiting for us to leave and become independent so she could give up the last bit of motivation. While my Father had a Nihilistic view of the world.

So for your idea that my ideal woman is my mother...

... you Couldn't be more wrong.

My Ideal woman would CRUSH my Mother under the heel of her boot if she ever met her. Not that it would be a hard task though, my mother is the weakest woman I have ever had the misfortune of meeting.

And so... I must say, that Freudian stuff doesn't apply to me.

I HAVE NO MOTHER FIGURE!

So you're saying your ideal woman is a video game character?

I'd stick with telling people its your mother, it seems healthier.

How do I even respond to that?

The astounding number of Cats and Dogs I've had over the years were better parents to me than my Mother!

In my mind, saying that my ideal woman came from ANYWHERE else but my mother is astoundingly more healthy sounding than claiming that the empty husk of a woman that occupied the same house as my for 18 years had anything to do with it!

I would rather say a giant spider raised me than say my mother did, I would rather say I was raised by Cthulhu than say my mother had anything to do with who I am, and I would rather say I was Raised by Orcs than say My mother is anything like my ideal woman.

So I can safety say: If you knew my Mother, You wouldn't say it would seem healthier to say my ideal woman is my mother.

Claiming I'm a freaking troll from Homestuck is infinitely healthier from my perspective. But the main Problem with that is that it's freaking impossible!

So Screw Freudian excuses! They don't even apply when your mother is as screwed up as mine!

Thus I must congratulate you for finding a fitting reason for me to have to reveal I was essentially Raised by Wolves rather than my parents! Well done!

... I really wish I could lie about all that. But unfortunately, the only way to get it through everyone's heads how broken my mother is... is to tell them the complete... Honest... And Tragic Truth of this matter.

My so called "Mother" barely even qualifies as any kind of self sufficient being. She's a wreck of a human being with barely any sense of agency inside her. She's a shell of a human being with not even the decency to attempt to fill her empty existence.

From my perspective... If you knew my mother... There is no way you can justify your opinion.

Unless of course, I lied about who my mother was, but considering the few people I have frequent contact already know my mother, it's pointless to even try!

As for you guys, you're people I will probably never meet in person, what's the point in trying to butter up the issue with a convenient lie when I'm unlikely to even have a clue who you people even are?!

"Healthier to say I'm attracted to my Mother!" I've never heard a bigger insult in all my life!

Why should I even bother explaining it? All it does... Is remind my self how much I hate myself... for not being strong enough... for being such a pathetic being who can't even muster enough will to change that fact...

I am afraid... Afraid I'll turn into someone just as useless as my parents... And yet I somehow manage to sabotage my own efforts to escape it...

...It will take a tremendous effort for me to fully realize... that nobody is going to save me from my own downfall... And a girl is certainly not going to help with that...

...So why bother? A girl isn't going to solve this... Nothing can except hiding it away like some piece of garbage till trash day.

...

Sorry to subject you all to that.

Warachia:

Gunjester:

I never said it wasn't love, I said you were loving the illusion of a personality. And I was just trying to explain the mindset of the man who made the video, not necessarily express my own point of view on the subject.

But if they are fully self aware then there is no "illusion" of a personality, it IS a personality, I stick by my point though, if he's against the relationship because EDI isn't a living thing, then he's just as shallow as the people in loving the illusion of a personality, he's not in it for them as a person, he's just interested in their body.

I think we all realized the host of this video was shallow.
Are you really surprised? He's from Smosh.

I liked Joker and Edi and how do you 'accidently' sleep with Zevran the guys as subtle as an archdemon.

This isn't Lisa Foiles :-(

Agree with Joker/EDI, I thought it was far too damned weird, even for BioWare trying to cater for everyone. How it was made so commonplace, and in fact, the paragon option is scary. Encouraging a man to hook up with a computer is just frikkin' bizarre and I'd never condone such a thing in real life.

I could point out many problems with this, but first and foremost is simple. If the guy had actually paid attention to what was being said, the romance scene with Zervan wouldn't have caught him off-guard. Seriously to miss something like that you'd have to had skipped through diaolgue or have been extremely obtuse and missed the hints.

Gameguy20100:
I liked Joker and Edi and how do you 'accidently' sleep with Zevran the guys as subtle as an archdemon.

Yeah, same here on both counts. With all the genuinely mock-worthy and cheeseball romances in games, these two (and pacman, really?) made the list?

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