Every Game Ever

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Every Game Ever

It's satire when we do it.

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OMG Spoilers! Bad Erin! I was just about to play [Game]!

Genericism: the last bastion of profit.

That's completely untrue, most games don't last [x] hours...

Me55enger:
Genericism: the last bastion of profit.

This and boobs getting bigger and bigger.

Was her chest getting bigger every panel? This game was obviously made by Bioware.

That's not true! Sometimes [mandatory love interest] is a brunette!
And I couldn't help but notice that you pulled a Persephone with [mandatory love interest].
This game may be Triple-A but her boobs sure aren't.

breasts and boobs and jumbling nublies.

I love how [SUPPORT CHARACTER/LOVE INTEREST]'s "assets" get larger in each panel. That's how you can really tell that they're the one you're supposed to save

...Anyways, I can tell that the [PROTAGONIST] sort of looks like generic marine wearing Master Chief armor, and the [SUPPORT CHARACTER/LOVE INTEREST] sort of looks like Courtney from Metal Gear Rising, except more revealing, but I wonder what the [ANTAGONIST] is drawing from. I guess the eye=patch and scar make him evil, but I want to say I've seen the coat somewhere before, just can't put my finger on it.

What?! I didn't know [Antagonist] would break [his/her/its/their] promise of [love interest/support character]'s safety!
Thanks for spoiling it!

[support character/love interest]s breasts keep growing every frame she is in X3.

Well, time to be a jerk and say that most Silent Hill games don't work that way...

Why does the blonde girl look kinda anime-ish it's not really your usual styl... oh wait, the ever-expanding boobs. It's gotta be the boobs.

Some developers have specialized variations on that comic. For instance, Bioware has "You are the [chosen one], and only you can save the [variable scale landmass] from the [supernatural fuckwits]! But first you must find [in-universe jargon for "flag state toggles"] by doing inane sidequests in these [three/four] locations!"

When Dragon Age 3 comes out, see if you can fill out all the boxes. I'll bet you can.

I really feel that [SUPPORT CHARACTER/LOVE INTEREST] is what really makes [game] as good as it is, due to her amazing personality and character.
I especially like when [protagonist] and [antagonist] had that great moment when they [inappropriate] with [SUPPORT CHARACTER/LOVE INTEREST] while she was tied up that is intill the [evil thing]used it's tentacles to [inappropriate] which really ruined the mood.

Not sure what the funny is. That some believe this is true or that it's a stereotypical view of games in general.
I guess it's whatever you get out of the comic that's the point.

Actually, I think we need more games like the one represented in a comic. I can't remember the last time the "evil thing" was a giant tentacle monster and not some terrorist group or a an oversized humanoid commanded by a james bond villain holding the protagonists girlfriend over a pit of acid in a doom fortress.

Especially with the aesthetics shown in the comic. Seriously. It'd be hilarious!

Wait a minute... You forgot [MINORITY SIDEKICK]
It is a must

Made me laugh and that's all I need, i will be laughing to myself like some crazy person for the rest of the day

... I don't remember any of Bowser's Minions ever trying to back stab him (Intentionally, I know in Super Paper Mario Count Blech was brainwashing Bowser's Troops, but that wasn't an intentional back stab on Bowsers End)... Nor do I remember Mario ever using a gun... And Bowser doesn't really release any great Evils, probably because he Is for all intents and purposes the Evil of the Game (Bowser doesn't release the Shadow Queen in Paper Mario 2, FYI).

Actually, you could probably make a good game out of this; an intentionally cheesy, affectionate parody done in the style of Mel Brooks' Spaceballs.

Just get a bunch of Funimation actors to ham it up and your golden.

valium:
Was her chest getting bigger every panel? This game was obviously made by Bioware.

Or the same people who bought us the Dante's Inferno anime. Seriously. They had an interesting method where a different animator handled each circle...however, it's a little coincidental that it happens to go in order of beatrice's ever increasing bra size.

It might get old fast, but I would actually play a game that was self aware to this degree.

I mean, if your characters name was [Protagonist] and your entire point was to foil the [Antagonist] before he did his shit, combined with a few more tropes and a cheery cell-shaded art style. As long as it kept the jokes coming and, more importantly, actually had decent gameplay, it would be quite enjoyable. I would play [Generic Marine] fighting [Huge Thing that Telegraphs Attacks], hell as long as it had decent [Obligatory Driving Sequences] it would be fun overall.

blackrave:
Wait a minute... You forgot [MINORITY SIDEKICK]
It is a must

Which is your favourite? The black guy, the sassy action girl who isn't the love interest, or the old man? For me, it's got to be the stereotypical English guy!

...

Im sorry, what?

I was distracted by the:

what was the point of this comic again?

The Cheezy One:

blackrave:
Wait a minute... You forgot [MINORITY SIDEKICK]
It is a must

Which is your favourite? The black guy, the sassy action girl who isn't the love interest, or the old man? For me, it's got to be the stereotypical English guy!

My favorite is Asian Hacker Man

I think her boobs got bigger every frame...

Maybe I'm just playing the wrong games, but I can't remember any game I've ever played where all of that has happened, and in that order, let alone 'Every Game Ever'.

Slow day today was it? -_-

NinjaDeathSlap:
Maybe I'm just playing the wrong games, but I can't remember any game I've ever played where all of that has happened, and in that order, let alone 'Every Game Ever'.

Slow day today was it? -_-

I agree more or less

eather way *sigh* yes lets just hate everything ever....

ok I know I'm not having an sense of humour right now but I'm kind of tired of this shit

Nothing I have played in the past couple of years comes even close to what was shown in that comic, it seems the writers are a bit behind times. Or maybe it really was a slow day as said above :P

Perhaps "Every Nintendo game ever" would've been slightly more vaguely relevant if Mario/Link wore power-armor, used guns and Peach/Zelda were...Peach/Zelda :P

Uratoh:
OMG Spoilers! Bad Erin! I was just about to play [Game]!

Yeah, it was dickish of Erin to put up a spoiler alert after she spoiled [Game] for us.

NinjaDeathSlap:
Maybe I'm just playing the wrong games, but I can't remember any game I've ever played where all of that has happened, and in that order, let alone 'Every Game Ever'.

Slow day today was it? -_-

Vault101:

NinjaDeathSlap:
Maybe I'm just playing the wrong games, but I can't remember any game I've ever played where all of that has happened, and in that order, let alone 'Every Game Ever'.

Slow day today was it? -_-

I agree more or less

eather way *sigh* yes lets just hate everything ever....

ok I know I'm not having an sense of humour right now but I'm kind of tired of this shit

ITT: people who do not understand hyperbole or comedy.

Though it seems there's an at least 80% chance that the people who miss hyperbole will then attempt their own.

Devoneaux:

The Cheezy One:

blackrave:
Wait a minute... You forgot [MINORITY SIDEKICK]
It is a must

Which is your favourite? The black guy, the sassy action girl who isn't the love interest, or the old man? For me, it's got to be the stereotypical English guy!

My favorite is Asian Hacker Man

Hey, don't you rule out Hispanic soldier with troubled past, that's a popular one lately.

Guess the game!

Long ago, [antagonist] exiled you. You escaped. So [antagonist] sent raiders to destroy you. They failed. So you travel across the game world, fighting enemies and accruing allies, in order to take revenge on [antagonist] and reclaim your original heritage.

(Not every game ever. Just the unmemorable ones. Heck, in some games YOU're the one who unleashes the ancient spirit of vengeance or whatnot. )

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