Every Game Ever

 Pages PREV 1 2 3 4 5 NEXT
 

k-ossuburb:
Holy shit, the [evil thing] is Mantorok from Eternal Darkness! I love that game, it didn't have any love interests (besides the Karim bit, maybe, but she was incidental and technically wasn't captured) but it did pretty much play out this way.

Well, Mantorok was pretty much dead since the beginning, almost like a zombie giant octopus, but he definitely conspired against the other [evil things] and he's technically not an [evil thing], just a lesser [evil thing].

Grey Carter:
image

0_0 Aaaaannnd saved *click* its almost as if you want us to form some sort of attachment to the character.

SupahGamuh:

k-ossuburb:
Holy shit, the [evil thing] is Mantorok from Eternal Darkness! I love that game, it didn't have any love interests (besides the Karim bit, maybe, but she was incidental and technically wasn't captured) but it did pretty much play out this way.

Well, Mantorok was pretty much dead since the beginning, almost like a zombie giant octopus, but he definitely conspired against the other [evil things] and he's technically not an [evil thing], just a lesser [evil thing].

If you got the "true" ending you'll find out that Mantorok is the most [evil thing] of all the [evil thing]s in that game because

Guitar Hero.

YOUR ARGUMENT IS INVALID

k-ossuburb:

Ohhhh... then I understood it wrong all these years. Granted, it's been a LOOONG time since the last time I played Eternal Darkness, I got the 4th ending and I understood that:

So yeah, that adds another layer into it's already awesome layer heavy and complex story of Eternal Darkness.

Ironically this is so silly I'd actually play it. haha Oh if only more games were self away of industry cliches, so much comedy could be had.

Grey Carter:
snip

Chibi Erin has some crazy thighs.

EDIT:er, claves, that's the lower part of the leg, right, ahem

Bonus points for making the protagonist a generic-looking, white, brown-haired military guy who is apparently incapable of forming any facial expression other than a scowl.

I mean, hell, say what you will about Duke Nukem- at least he can smile.


But really, when was the last time someone hung the love interest over a tub of acid?

Well if anything it's at least a story that's easy to follow.

i liked [SUPPORT CHARACTER/LOVE INTEREST] dress was weird she was falling out of it at then end and gees spoiler alert is suppose to go at the START of the comic/post/thread/video

Zachary Amaranth:

ITT: people who do not understand hyperbole or comedy.

Though it seems there's an at least 80% chance that the people who miss hyperbole will then attempt their own.

please explain the joke because I dont get it

Ohh no, the fumes are making her breasts bigger said no straight man ever.

Now I must go beat some unimaginative bosses in wow.

I don't believe this is like every game ever; it's too colorful. Nothings washed out to look gray/brown!
nice job on [support character/love interest]'s funbags, though.

Were you thinking of Borderlands 2 when you wrote this?

Grey Carter:
image

That is just fantastic. :D

I shall need to find excuses to use this around the forums.

In fact, you should make it your avatar.

I'd mention that lately, the Formulaic Game Recipe has started to include Aesops. Like "Transhumanism makes us question our nature as humans" (Deus Ex: Human Revolution) or "Humans will do cray-cray stuff to other humans in the name of survival. Innit deep?" (FarCry 3).

Or you could go CryTek's route and not bother. "It's the Ceph's fault. Whatever it is, no matter if it makes sense or not, it's the Ceph's fault and the Nanosuit's involved. Also, boo, PMC's and global megacorps!"

I'm going to say most games do have this cliche' plot going on.. but luckily, there are games that do not involve such a thing.
One great example would be Pokemon. You're basically beating everyone's pets to get on top as #1 champ. :}

Saw boobs. Clicked.

IS THAT YOU PLAN ALL ALONG, GREY AND CORY?! DON'T LIE TO ME! WHAT'S YOUR END GAME?!?

grigjd3:

PunkRex:

VectorZero:
[pop culture reference]

[Witty retort]

[Third party jumping in with unhelpful, antagonistic statement]

[Long worded retort explaining why third party is wrong, unintentionally restating third party's statements.]

[Copy-paste of funny Captcha]

Two things:

[X] < 6 hours--in most AAA games
and
Where are the Russians? You can't have a every game template without Russians.

I would probably play the Hell out of a game like that.

*sigh* Duke Nukem Forever, what might've been.

Grey Carter:

NinjaDeathSlap:

It's just a cheap shot, made by snooty and aloof hipsters who think it makes them the God of Satire, when in fact it just shows that they don't know how writing works.

Gods of satire, surely. And you think we don't know how writing works. :)

Thus the boob embiggening!

Grey Carter:
image

You know if I had posted that I would have received a low content warning and would have gained another bar.........I guess be a contributor comes with unfair perks T_T.

But... you forgot the part where you get sent off on a tangent to collect the [PLOT VOUCHER].

Boobies are evil then?

Mocmocman:

grigjd3:

PunkRex:

[Witty retort]

[Third party jumping in with unhelpful, antagonistic statement]

[Long worded retort explaining why third party is wrong, unintentionally restating third party's statements.]

[Comparison between above poster's statement and Nazis.]

OT: Alright, this made me laugh. 'specially since I swear I've played a few dozen iterations of of [Game].

Kinda feels more like every movie ever rather than every game ever but still a fair point. There really is a lot of run on with plot structure.

Lt. Rocky:
Interesting how a comic showing the cliches in games winds up showing a cliche in gamers. I've lost count of how many people are making note of the girl's chest size.

It makes one wonder: are we as two-dimensional as what we play or are exposed to?

Nobody is as deep as they think they are.

If you think you aren't like everbody else, you're wrong.

Man, too true. I hate having to save that generic love interest in Call of Duty. And that final boss in Mass Effect 3 sure was slimy. And when are they going to stop putting more bigger boobs in Mario?!

mdqp:
I lolled... And then I lolled again. Great comic, but I must say that the evil thing is a bit too original, you should have gone for a giant robot, because everyone love giant robots, even when they are evil.

I was thinking a giant crab that has it's weak spot open up periodically to fire a laser beam which can be targeted from the side or while it charges up.

I feel like this is the moment you maybe realize you're making fun of games because they are unsophisticated. Which is weird since video games are mostly for, you know, teenager/kids.

Its like demanding more variation in superhero cartoons.

omicron1:
Guess the game!

Long ago, [antagonist] exiled you. You escaped. So [antagonist] sent raiders to destroy you. They failed. So you travel across the game world, fighting enemies and accruing allies, in order to take revenge on [antagonist] and reclaim your original heritage.

(Not every game ever. Just the unmemorable ones. Heck, in some games YOU're the one who unleashes the ancient spirit of vengeance or whatnot. )

Sounds a little bit like kotor 2. Except that game is rad.

Therumancer:
I was thinking a giant crab that has it's weak spot open up periodically to fire a laser beam which can be targeted from the side or while it charges up.

Let's go all the way to the bottom, then, and make it an evil wizard (it's always their fault, anyway).

:D :D :D

P.s.

Chibi Erin looks a bit too round, was it her boss who made that gif? Sounds plausible, right?

UsefulPlayer 1:
I feel like this is the moment you maybe realize you're making fun of games because they are unsophisticated. Which is weird since video games are mostly for, you know, teenager/kids.

Its like demanding more variation in superhero cartoons.

Hey, thanks for reading.

1: It's not really about sophistication as it is satisfying narratives. Most games stick to the Hero's Journey arc because it's a very easy story to tell. What's weird is that many games deviate from that traditional arc in odd ways that make the game less satisfying. A great example of this is introducing an antagonist who harasses the player throughout the game, then having the "main boss" kill them, or killing them offscreen. Games are very good at giving players a sense of achievement, yet their narratives often directly contradict that aim.

2: The average gamer is 30, I think it's time we started demanding more from our entertainment.

3: Just because something is aimed at older kids/teens doesn't mean it has an excuse to be creatively bankrupt. "Young adult" lit is currently making a killing because it treats young readers with respect. I think games should do the same.

knight steel:

You know if I had posted that I would have received a low content warning and would have gained another bar.........I guess be a contributor comes with unfair perks T_T.

Except that's a hand-drawn animation made specifically for this topic. It took Cory a couple of hours and is definitely not low-content.

lithiumvocals:

omicron1:
Guess the game!

Long ago, [antagonist] exiled you. You escaped. So [antagonist] sent raiders to destroy you. They failed. So you travel across the game world, fighting enemies and accruing allies, in order to take revenge on [antagonist] and reclaim your original heritage.

(Not every game ever. Just the unmemorable ones. Heck, in some games YOU're the one who unleashes the ancient spirit of vengeance or whatnot. )

Sounds a little bit like kotor 2. Except that game is rad.

I was thinking Homeworld.

I guess it is a bit of a trope plot... wasn't there some guy that said there were only ever six plots for western novels? Maybe the same thing applies here.

Grey Carter:

UsefulPlayer 1:
I feel like this is the moment you maybe realize you're making fun of games because they are unsophisticated. Which is weird since video games are mostly for, you know, teenager/kids.

Its like demanding more variation in superhero cartoons.

Hey, thanks for reading.

1: It's not really about sophistication as it is satisfying narratives. Most games stick to the Hero's Journey arc because it's a very easy story to tell. What's weird is that many games deviate from that traditional arc in odd ways that make the game less satisfying. A great example of this is introducing an antagonist who harasses the player throughout the game, then having the "main boss" kill them, or killing them offscreen. Games are very good at giving players a sense of achievement, yet their narratives often directly contradict that aim.

2: The average gamer is 30, I think it's time we started demanding more from our entertainment.

3: Just because something is aimed at older kids/teens doesn't mean it has an excuse to be creatively bankrupt. "Young adult" lit is currently making a killing because it treats young readers with respect. I think games should do the same.

I'm pretty sure I've read every single CriticalMiss strip, many of them more than once. So big you're welcome haha.

And I should add I'm the one who wants more variation in superhero cartoons. I love Young Justice and greatly enjoy how much care they take in crafting each episode/arc. And I'm pretty bummed that there isn't a Marvel equivalent. The only one I thought that came close recently was Wolverine and the X-men and that show got canceled.

I hope what you said is true about the average gamer. I think the group is certainly getting bigger. I'm just thinking we are demanding exactly what you described, but the population just isn't there to make it happen on a regular basis. Same for me and superhero cartoons, if Young Justice gets canceled perhaps the older audience isn't as big as I've imagined and I'm probably just a weirdo.

I always thought that games like Dead Space would have moved toward their niches if they just had been bigger.

 Pages PREV 1 2 3 4 5 NEXT

Reply to Thread

Log in or Register to Comment
Have an account? Login below:
With Facebook:Login With Facebook
or
Username:  
Password:  
  
Not registered? To sign up for an account with The Escapist:
Register With Facebook
Register With Facebook
or
Register for a free account here