Escape to the Movies: Pain & Gain

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l3o2828:
No Bob. He's not saying he hates humanity or anything. He's just a bad director and film maker.

STOP.TRYING.TO.SEE.THINGS.WHERE.THERE.IS.NONE.

Ugh...

Look, the job of a film critic, like all other art critics, is to discuss, dissect, and, if they deem neccesary, interpret film. It doesn't matter whose behind it, all films are art and they should be treated as such.

Bob's just doing his job.

So in short. This is the best M. Bay can do which amounts to "its ok for what it is, but it wasn't all that."

Bindal:

The Gentleman:
Wait... there's a Transformers 4 I need to avoid now?

Coming in some unknown time - but except that Bay is most likely directing it, the only thing known is that NONE of the human cast is coming back.

Yes but it's going to be a while because China needs to do a reality competition TV show to decide who gets to be in the bits that they're shooting in China.

So does this movie follow the typical Michael Bay pacing formula where the first half is as boring as watching two turtles fuck and the second half is pretty much just one long explosion or not? I might check this movie out when it comes out on DVD\Blu-Ray just for Tony Shaloub getting tazed in the side of the head in slow motion, not because I don't like him but because it looks funny.

franksands:

Duffeknol:
Dude, Bob, The Rock is his masterpiece, not Bad Boys II. The Rock isn't even a guilty pleasure. The Rock is a fucking amazing film.

Wow, my mind is officially blown. I never knew The Rock was directed by Michael Bay. The Rock is really fucking amazing and it has Sean Connery as a bonus. How did he went from that to these kinds of garbage we see today?

I've seen the making of. Basically, The Rock was before they cut Michael Bay completely loose. They had a stellar writing team who put a ton of effort into the story and screenplay, THEN they had Bay do his thing, which turned out amazing. After The Rock was such a great success, the studios kind of stopped caring about giving him good material to work with, which lead to more explosions and less involving films.

Duffeknol:
Dude, Bob, The Rock is his masterpiece, not Bad Boys II. The Rock isn't even a guilty pleasure. The Rock is a fucking amazing film.

This is what I opened the Comments section to say. My second favorite action movie, ever, only surpassed by Heat. But lets face it. Nothing is better than Heat.

I just can't bring myself to care about this movie.
It sounds wretched to watch, and I genuinely don't understand why anyone would want to watch something like this.
If you're in a state of mind where you think so little of humanity, then why would you continue to consume media that would only exacerbate this condition?

CCountZero:

Duffeknol:
Dude, Bob, The Rock is his masterpiece, not Bad Boys II. The Rock isn't even a guilty pleasure. The Rock is a fucking amazing film.

This is what I opened the Comments section to say. My second favorite action movie, ever, only surpassed by Heat. But lets face it. Nothing is better than Heat.

I honestly prefer The Rock. I own 4 copies. VHS, DVD, Criterion DVD and Blu-Ray. I might be biased.

i really liked Armageddon and The Island (though i was considerably younger and easier to please when i saw them). i dont get how people are watching this and getting the idea that he thinks its a good movie. it seems to me that bob is calling it a stupid but entertaining movie that is almost as good as bad boys 2. thats hardly what i would calling a shining endorsement

also, is he really making a 4th transformers movie, or was that a joke?

Bindal:

The Gentleman:
Wait... there's a Transformers 4 I need to avoid now?

Coming in some unknown time - but except that Bay is most likely directing it, the only thing known is that NONE of the human cast is coming back.

Yay, now we can have a whole new cast of humans to run around and be useless foreground characters to the backdrop of robots theoretically at war with each other.

I am taking issue with the statement Bob made saying that the story was "mostly true."

Marc Schiller, the victim and character played by Tony Shaloub, did plead guilty in 1999 to one count of Medicare Fraud, but, before then he was beaten, tortured, and extorted for a full month before he escaped. Also, Mr. Schiller's lifestyle was nothing like what is portrayed in the film. In fact, during Mr. Schiller's sentencing, the judge himself spoke in Mr. Schiller's defense, and gave him the lightest punishment available by law.

When Mr. Schiller first gave his testimony to police, they doubted him, likely because of the ongoing federal investigation he was under and because of the absurdity of his story. However, Lugo (Marky Mark) and company succeeded in successfully killing their next victims while the police were sitting on their thumbs.

Frank Griga and his girlfriend Krisztina Furton were completely innocent and were brutally murdered by Lugo and his accomplices months later. To portray Marky Mark as a bumbling mischief maker is simply wrong in this film, in reality his character was a cold sociopath. This is the full story here, which takes a sociopath to see as anything other than a tragedy.

http://www.miaminewtimes.com/1999-12-23/news/pain-gain/

franksands:

Duffeknol:
Dude, Bob, The Rock is his masterpiece, not Bad Boys II. The Rock isn't even a guilty pleasure. The Rock is a fucking amazing film.

Wow, my mind is officially blown. I never knew The Rock was directed by Michael Bay. The Rock is really fucking amazing and it has Sean Connery as a bonus. How did he went from that to these kinds of garbage we see today?

The Rock was his first Hollywood movie I believe, subsequently he was still 'just' a director of music videos and not a known quantity. As other posters pointed out; the writing for the film is actually pretty tight and they hired a good bunch of actors: Ed Harris' General Hummel is a very sympathetic man and 2IC played by David Morse is if nothing else a decent archetype of the loyal follower.

Indeed, when summoned before a group of executives about the movie's filming time and budget, Sean Connery (in full golfing gear) accompanied Michael Bay and basically said to them "He's doing fine, chill the fuck out".

Its a good flick; the action is tight, the dialogue has enough funny/serious without the context being to jarring and the protagonists are easy to like and as discussed: the villain's motivations make sense and are easy to sympathise with even if the method isn't.

Wow this sounds just so much better than Spring Breakers!

I will be going to see it next week

Couldn't resist taking a shot at Paul Ryan, could you? Fair enough, though I submit to you that he would make a far better VP than than the four most recent occupants of that position.

About the Percy Jackson tag: the first Percy Jackson movie was actually a better Clash of the Titans than the Clash of the Titans movie that came out the same year. Just saying.

Wow, I saw Iron Man 3 before Bob got a chance to? That seems vaguely wrong somehow...

Jesus, Mark and Dwayne REALLY bulked up since the last time I saw them.

Jman1236:
Okay first Yahtzee like a nintendo game and now bob liking a michel bay film....DEAR GOD IT IS THE END OF THE WORLD!

Uhm, Yahtzee liking a Nintendo game isn't unheard of. He does like both Super Mario Galaxy games and most of the Mario RPG games.

I'm kinda interested in this movie, guess I'll check it out when it's released on DVD.

I feel like Bob gets Crime and Capitalism mixed up sometimes.

The premise sounds interesting, if it was a explored by a good filmmaker maybe I'd go watch it.

CWestfall:

l3o2828:
No Bob. He's not saying he hates humanity or anything. He's just a bad director and film maker.

STOP.TRYING.TO.SEE.THINGS.WHERE.THERE.IS.NONE.

Bob's entire job is to deconstruct films. He's been doing that on this website alone for about 4 years. If you think he can't spot a work bereft of any artistic integrity when he sees it, you must think very little of him.

That is true, and when it comes to comedies, he has been failing for those whole 4 years. His reviews are great to listen to, and the big picture is awesome show, but if there is a thing bob does wrong its comedy reviews. this is a comedy film. tadam.

Jeremy Soltys:

Jman1236:
Okay first Yahtzee like a nintendo game and now bob liking a michel bay film....DEAR GOD IT IS THE END OF THE WORLD!

Stay tuned next week, when Jim Sterling totally makes out with EA and Activision.

Well, Jimquisition bonus is first time in its life recommending is to support a "game". so while not EA and activision, it kinda happened.

capcha: Seven signs.
ok, we got 3, whats next?

CWestfall:

l3o2828:
No Bob. He's not saying he hates humanity or anything. He's just a bad director and film maker.

STOP.TRYING.TO.SEE.THINGS.WHERE.THERE.IS.NONE.

Bob's entire job is to deconstruct films. He's been doing that on this website alone for about 4 years. If you think he can't spot a work bereft of any artistic integrity when he sees it, you must think very little of him.

Did you even watch the review? Bob just called Bad Boys 2 Bay's "masterpiece". If this was Looney Tunes my jaw would have smashed through the floor. Nevermind The Rock (which is obviously his best), I would rather watch Armageddon 10 times in a row, than 10 minutes of either Bad Boys movie.

It's not a question of thinking very little of him, the problem is that his latest reviews are not giving any reason to think very much of him (hating Oblivion because of its premise or hoping that G.I. Joe 2 would mount to be anything else than a shlock it turned out to be).

This is a Michael Bay movie and Bob ends up talking about meaninglessness of human existence and human fallibility.

As the OP put it, THIS simply is a case of Seeing Things Where There Is None.

Ok I liked Bad Boys one but never really got on with 2... but now you have put it in conext I am totally torn? This film may be worth a watch down the line, to many comic films and maybe Iceman and Hangover part 3 to watch this spring summer to waste coin on this but maybe i'll spend on a cheap DVD or rental.

00slash00:
is he really making a 4th transformers movie, or was that a joke?

Yes he is. Bay has been trying to make Pain & Gain for years, but no studio has wanted to produce it.

He finally got it produced under the condition that he returns for Transformers 4. So basically he got blackmailed into making another Transformers movie.

jFr[e]ak93:
The offensive part about this to me (besides Michael Bay) is that it's true.
I had trouble with Fargo for the same reason. Making an over the top action movie out of some guy getting the snot pounded out of him and people getting murdered seems in poor taste to me (I'm not calling Fargo an action movie, to clarify).
This just seems like smut.

I can ease your pain a little by revealing that Fargo is fictional, they simply pulled an Blair Witch at the start of the movie to draw the audience's attention.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fargo_(film)#Factual_basis

Pain & Gain, on the other hand, seems to be based on true events. (As is Troll Hunter.)

I was really looking to a "It's so bad that it's good" flick. Now, I'm not sure...

Ryan Hughes:
I am taking issue with the statement Bob made saying that the story was "mostly true."

Marc Schiller, the victim and character played by Tony Shaloub, did plead guilty in 1999 to one count of Medicare Fraud, but, before then he was beaten, tortured, and extorted for a full month before he escaped. Also, Mr. Schiller's lifestyle was nothing like what is portrayed in the film. In fact, during Mr. Schiller's sentencing, the judge himself spoke in Mr. Schiller's defense, and gave him the lightest punishment available by law.

When Mr. Schiller first gave his testimony to police, they doubted him, likely because of the ongoing federal investigation he was under and because of the absurdity of his story. However, Lugo (Marky Mark) and company succeeded in successfully killing their next victims while the police were sitting on their thumbs.

Frank Griga and his girlfriend Krisztina Furton were completely innocent and were brutally murdered by Lugo and his accomplices months later. To portray Marky Mark as a bumbling mischief maker is simply wrong in this film, in reality his character was a cold sociopath. This is the full story here, which takes a sociopath to see as anything other than a tragedy.

http://www.miaminewtimes.com/1999-12-23/news/pain-gain/

I'm surprised you're the only one so far who has made any mention of the real life events Bay based this film on. I find it very disturbing that Bay would make such light of what really is a brutal and horrible crime where families of the victims are still around to see this.

These kinds of movies are just pure turn off to me. I do think you might be reading too much into it, but I get the appeal of watching macho power hyper-fantasy stuff like this. It's the same way I can enjoy the cheesiest and most predictable rom-coms out there. At least Michael Bay is doing something other than Transformers haha.

Oh hey, Marky-mark! The dude who blinded a Vietnamese man with a sharp stick but never bothered to track him down afterwards because he'd "forgiven himself."

Remind me why anyone should support that man's work?

thisbymaster:
Well there was one line in the trailer that killed me ever seeing this, "This guy understands me.". If I can't root for the hero or villain then why am I watching?

That's kind of the joke in this case, so says Bob at least. Watch the movie to see all the characters in it suffer horrible fates so that you can feel that justice has been served.

shadowmagus:

Jman1236:
Okay first Yahtzee like a nintendo game and now bob liking a michel bay film....DEAR GOD IT IS THE END OF THE WORLD!

I don't know what's true anymore!

I NEED AN ADULT!

(...and Bob didn't go on a completely white knight hate rant on the Dragons Crown Sorceress controversy. Obviously, it's opposite week at the Escapist)

WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE! (Randomly throws a guy out a nearby window) (Insert TV Test screen here)

Transformers4?
No, no, no Bob.
Not Transformers4
TMNT, Bob, Teenage Mutherfucking Ninja Turtles, dammit!!!
And now for some unexplained reasons I am pissed as shit >:(
And I suddenly regret uninstalling Postal2

Changing the subject for a moment here (to other films that were briefly mentioned) one of the things I particularly noticed about The Island was its conspicuous lack of Hollywood-style fireballs. It came to my attention when on the DVD the splash is of McGregor and Johansson fleeing a giant fireball. This never happens in the film, because nothing ever explodes like a fuel-pile in the film. Did anyone else ever notice that? We are talking about a Michael Bay film.

Regarding the new Percy Jackson film, I'd like it if they did the source material justice, which the first film most certainly did not. I suspect that unlike Harry Potter, in which Rowling retained total control over the IP, and insisted that the movies follow her vision. I suspect that Riordan either didn't or couldn't arrange a similar control over his own IP.

238U

Urameshi13:
Couldn't resist taking a shot at Paul Ryan, could you? Fair enough, though I submit to you that he would make a far better VP than than the four most recent occupants of that position.

Then I submit to you that you are wrong. Just watch any given one of The Young Turks' videos on Paul Ryan.

Oh yes, the intellectual might that is TYT. I take that schmuck about as seriously as I take Limbaugh and every other politically-charged blowhard (not very).

"Like a cross between Captain America and Joe Friday..." THAT, sounds like an interesting character.

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