19: Jerk on the Internet

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Jerk on the Internet

Shannon Drake is a "Jerk on the Internet," and he's happy to tell you all about it. From the mind of the enemy, to your copy of The Escapist, for your reading pleasure.

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I think its great to watch how TK's play games like CS/CS:S/BF2.

Its like the bully in the playground, beating up the nerdy kid for no better reason than he's wearing a funny shirt... human nature i say... someone's got to be the bully... someone else has to be the nerdy kid.

that was possibly one of the best things i've read in a long time. i haven't played CS in years because of the same people you enjoy TKing. i applaude your actions, "jerk on the internet".

A funny read, but with a name like "Shannon" as a guy, I'm guessing you're probably really trying to kick other people around just as you've been kicked around by people in RL. People you make cry over a video game are pathetic, but if anything, you're even more so.

I never played counter strike much so i cant really relate but I played gears of war a lot and youd be surprised how much the average team killer cares about the game. If someone team kills me I forget about whatever objectives there are in the game and hunt them down for the rest of the game, getting the same anguished crys you talk about. Eventually the offender leaves or ignores everyone but me for the entire game and the problem is solved. This way I get the enjoyment without being as much of a complete prick as you.

Throwing a grenade into a group of people who are trusting you to knife the other guys back, not their's, is very, very funny.

But I don't do it because it is actually more rewarding to play and win the game with these people than it is to kill them all and thus never even give them the chance.

Though this does bring back memories of the one time I was playing CS, and my teammates were idiots, so for the next round, I shot them all in the head before they could run off and ruin my game, then I went about and killed all the terrorists and won pretty much single handedly.

I was awesome that day, though the next round, all my buddies simultaneously decided to knife me, so I only got to feel like god once.

So, yeah, don't do it, cause they'll just gang up on you instead of working together with you to win.

It's not just the game, and it's not about whether you take it seriously,
it's about consequences, maybe it's just a game, or is it?

Because I understand your mental degree and background, how that fascinates.
And you like hurting folks, in the mind.
A psychologist, a doctor, the very person who took the oath.
And what better position of trust to achieve.

Why don't you come with me sometime, on a trip over the edge?
Seriously, I've been there at least a hundred times, obviously it's not so bad.
It's folks like you who send me there, not in the game, that isn't serious enough, we agree.

Because folks like you exist in all walks of life.
Some work at the IRS, and some of them find it amusing to watch you suffer,
send you threatening letters over taxes you have paid 3 times over already,
still they want to seize your assets and then they freeze your bank account.
Of course, there is nothing you can do.

Others are down in Guantanamo Bay, Cuba.
They like hurting other people, too.
So are you just making sure your line of patients doesn't run short?
Because it is fascinating, trust me, I know.

It is things like these that first made me see the logic and the mechanics behind going postal.
I have it now, the whole thing, I would know exactly how, when, where, and with what to do it, even how many people to kill at a minimum.

Sadly, it would be you whom I would expect to do it.
After all I only saw the logic, much like I see the logic behind griefing, it just doesn't attract me.
Well, it kind of does, but the consequences I don't care much for.

You on the other hand, you have the perfect mindset.

Griefing is on no higher plane of intellectual entertainment than the the enjoyment that 'pro' players get from taking CS and its like 'too' seriously. You claim to be doing this because it helps you unwind, or because you think other players take the game too seriously.

In reality you are doing this because you know you will never be able to achieve the level of play that they achieve, either through lack of skill or lack of time investment. Whether or not you think this would be a worthy achievement or not is irrelevant - you do it out of jealousy, the need to destroy someone else's fun/achievement/whatever you want to call it.

I'm no psychology major like you but I've played competitive online games enough to spot this behaviour pattern many, many times. I also happen to know from personal experience that the one thing psychologists are terrible at is examining their own behaviour.

So go ahead and grief people online, but don't fool yourself as to why you're doing it.

I think that the article is purely satirical. There's just no logic to the piece.

The author admits to getting a sick pleasure out of a game and yet derides the people who get some displeasure from taking it "too seriously"? I don't buy it. Using the "it's just a game" phrase and then taking time to be a habitual TKer, write up an article bragging about it and how others have a problem, but to him, it's just a game? I don't buy it. Relishing in being a TKer yet blaming the server for allowing friendly fire? I don't buy it.

There's just no reason to agree with anything the article states directly. I see this article as trying to be a look into the mind of a TKer-- a highly narcissistic and antisocial person, which I assume they are already (which is why I think this article is a performance piece by the writer rather than a confession). This article really gave me the creeps actually. I instantly thought of an old acquaintance of mine. He would steal things from his friends' (parents) homes, constantly. It might be a watch or a CD or something that he could easily take when he was there. He said he never considered it theft, but rather his reward for teaching people not to leave anything out in the open that 'someone' could steal. I also recall a time that he had a purse that he "found." He took whatever money was in it and threw the bag away. Finders fee? Lesson he had to teach someone the hard way? I don't buy it. That's the vibe I got from this article.

8307c4:
It's not just the game, and it's not about whether you take it seriously,
it's about consequences, maybe it's just a game, or is it?

Because I understand your mental degree and background, how that fascinates.
And you like hurting folks, in the mind.
A psychologist, a doctor, the very person who took the oath.
And what better position of trust to achieve.

Why don't you come with me sometime, on a trip over the edge?
Seriously, I've been there at least a hundred times, obviously it's not so bad.
It's folks like you who send me there, not in the game, that isn't serious enough, we agree.

Because folks like you exist in all walks of life.
Some work at the IRS, and some of them find it amusing to watch you suffer,
send you threatening letters over taxes you have paid 3 times over already,
still they want to seize your assets and then they freeze your bank account.
Of course, there is nothing you can do.

Others are down in Guantanamo Bay, Cuba.
They like hurting other people, too.
So are you just making sure your line of patients doesn't run short?
Because it is fascinating, trust me, I know.

It is things like these that first made me see the logic and the mechanics behind going postal.
I have it now, the whole thing, I would know exactly how, when, where, and with what to do it, even how many people to kill at a minimum.

Sadly, it would be you whom I would expect to do it.
After all I only saw the logic, much like I see the logic behind griefing, it just doesn't attract me.
Well, it kind of does, but the consequences I don't care much for.

You on the other hand, you have the perfect mindset.

My goodness me, some people have fat mouths. The article was a fun read and a piece of harmless deviance, yet someone, somewhere still finds the need to write poetry or somekind of thesis on it.

Eh, I have a mother, ex-stepfather, and ex-bf with narcissistic personality disorder that are like that in real life. The losers don't grasp that other people are often "nice" because we already went through a bratty-jerk phase as kids, got to know our limits & abilities, then matured enough to explore more complex & challenging things. Hurting innocent/friendly people isn't fun, because it's so ridiculously easy that anyone can do it; being excited by it is like being thrilled at completing a child's paint-by-number, or a sixth-grade kid beating up a first-grader. Looks about as impressive too. *snicker*

What's challenging enough to be rewarding and *really* funny is targeting the normal trolls/griefers, especially with friends to laugh at the losers behind the scenes... It's great entertainment to see a bully swaggering because they're doing what almost anyone else can (making fun of them with your friends in private, of course), subtly provoking the 'victim' until they're throwing tantrums, then seeing them freak out when you find ways to make them terrified at what *might* be done to them. >:-)

Um, I thought the whole point of this article is that it's fun to have a place where there AREN'T consequences for being a jerk. Guantanamo and the IRS are sort of the opposite.

I'm not so sure that the original article-writer is the jerk he claims to be. Most TKers can't write that well for a start. I think he's just roleplaying a jerk for the sake of writing an interesting article. Viewed in this context, I think the article is actually a critique of jerks, not an appraisal of them.

I always thought griefing and TKing was the equivelent of singing along at the Opera or something. It shouldn't really matter what you think of the game, if the people playing are taking it seriously you should leave them to it.
Anyway, if the only thing stopping you from being a jerk is consequences then you are a jerk full stop. Kicking bullies though, I'm all for.

8307c4:
It's not just the game, and it's not about whether you take it seriously,
it's about consequences, maybe it's just a game, or is it?

Because I understand your mental degree and background, how that fascinates.
And you like hurting folks, in the mind.
A psychologist, a doctor, the very person who took the oath.
And what better position of trust to achieve.

Why don't you come with me sometime, on a trip over the edge?
Seriously, I've been there at least a hundred times, obviously it's not so bad.
It's folks like you who send me there, not in the game, that isn't serious enough, we agree.

Because folks like you exist in all walks of life.
Some work at the IRS, and some of them find it amusing to watch you suffer,
send you threatening letters over taxes you have paid 3 times over already,
still they want to seize your assets and then they freeze your bank account.
Of course, there is nothing you can do.

Others are down in Guantanamo Bay, Cuba.
They like hurting other people, too.
So are you just making sure your line of patients doesn't run short?
Because it is fascinating, trust me, I know.

It is things like these that first made me see the logic and the mechanics behind going postal.
I have it now, the whole thing, I would know exactly how, when, where, and with what to do it, even how many people to kill at a minimum.

Sadly, it would be you whom I would expect to do it.
After all I only saw the logic, much like I see the logic behind griefing, it just doesn't attract me.
Well, it kind of does, but the consequences I don't care much for.

You on the other hand, you have the perfect mindset.

Brevity is the soul of wit, no one likes it when you're pretentious, no matter how well-thought-out your response was. Anyway, you don't seem to be understanding why he does it. It's not out of sadism, antisocial tendencies, or narcissism that griefers grief. We do it to see how people react. I screw with people all the time in video games, and it's not because I enjoy causing problems for people(Well, there's a bit of that, but it's like the cherry on the sundae.) I do it to see what it takes to turn a normal, (marginally) intelligent person into a raving baboon, pounding on the keyboard in the hopes of forming something derogatory. An experiment in the workings of rage, if you will. I've discovered, with very few exceptions, that it doesn't take much to push people over the edge. A teamkill here, a custom-kick there, rational thinking goes out the window, and all that remains is the id, directing every resource available toward the destruction of the one that hinders its pleasure. It really gets interesting when people are unaffected. It gives a wonderful insight into what makes people immune to griefers. Several attributes are almost always present:
1. Proper spelling, punctuation, and sentence structure.
2. Awareness of why I grief
3. A futile attempt to inform the griefed of why I griefed them.
The third isn't as much an attribute as a reaction, but it occurs so often among the immune that I'll throw it in anyway.
Of course, there are griefers that do it out of sadism, narcissism, antisocial tendencies, blah blah blah. They're the ones that should be considered playground bullies, and go into a whole new avenue of discovery, griefing the griefers, but to avoid contradicting my opening statement any more than I already have, I won't go into it. Griefers like me are more like scientists. We enter a habitat or create our own(Game servers), manipulate variables in order to make the goal of existence in the habitat unattainable, and see how the inhabitants react. It's all in the name of science, you see.

What on Earth possessed the Escapist to publish this? It's not funny ... It's not clever ...

Its just an article about an asshole who likes to ruin other peoples fun for no other reason than he can.

Needless to say, won't be reading anymore of this.

Well, he's got a great point, it's lots of fun to piss people off in a game. They take things too seriously. You kill a guy on the other team too much, and he gets mad. You TK a guy to much and HE gets mad. You don't have do to much at all and people get mad. If someone doesn't react then you just leave them alone. Most of the time you just want to enjoy the game yourself and you don't do anything.

I wonder why people get mad when you TK them? Could it be because they're trying to play a game? Nah! Couldn't be...

Griefing, stage one: Magnifying glass and ant scouts. Ages 6-12

Griefing, stage two: Killing allies in a video game, possibly with side effect of increased anger towards other people in actual situations due to subconsciouses conditioning, resulting in subconsciously furthering your observations on anger based behavior, though potentially ruining your social life. Ages 13-30

Griefing, stage three: Real life results. You'll either take up anger related psychology, exploit people's minds for your own hedonistic desires or think yourself silly for having cyber-bullied for a past-time.

I admit now that this is just my guess, but I do feel it to be accurate enough.

Seriously, just because you went to college doesn't mean you have to take the small amount of possibly error-ridden information to heart and then constantly upset people under the guise of "study".

I enjoy chemistry, but I'd have to be completely mad to test the effects of synthesized stomach acid on real people for giggles.

Seriously, stop wanking you ego.

I don't find myself at all enlightened after reading that. It still seems like anyone who thinks they have a right to have fun at the expense of others is an immature ass. Nowhere in there do I see any reason why he is more important than the other gamers who he is harrassing, but he obviously thinks his time and enjoyment is more important than anyone else's and he gets to decide it for all of them. He gets to decide who he feels is taking the game too seriously then put all his effort into making sure they don't enjoy their free time. Seems to me he is taking it all too seriously as well, why not just find another game with a less serious group? Because that would be the mature thing to do!

I don't think it's amusing at all. I have to work my 40 a week and keep my family and house taken care of, I value what free time I have and wouldn't appreciate some self serving tool deciding for me that I'm not going to get any enjoyment out of it because what he wants is more important.

Muffles:
Anyway, you don't seem to be understanding why he does it. It's not out of sadism, antisocial tendencies, or narcissism that griefers grief. We do it to see how people react. I screw with people all the time in video games, and it's not because I enjoy causing problems for people(Well, there's a bit of that, but it's like the cherry on the sundae.) I do it to see what it takes to turn a normal, (marginally) intelligent person into a raving baboon, pounding on the keyboard in the hopes of forming something derogatory. An experiment in the workings of rage, if you will.

Bullshit.

Griefing is all about causing problems for other people. You try to obfuscate that, but it's clear in every line of your post; griefers do it to piss others off, and despite your tapdancing you end up saying so repeatedly. Griefers may rationalise it out as some grand social experiment, or as social commentary, or blame those they grief for deserving what they get... but it's still all about being untouchable and hindering the efforts of others for cheap, selfish pleasure.

Players who take the game too seriously can be tedious, but at least they're playing the same game as the other players and don't prevent them from playing. Griefers aren't even playing the game; they're playing their own game at everyone else's expense. Sorry, but if I step onto a baseball diamond I don't want to stand there watching the pitcher pretend to fellate the ball... I came to play baseball in the few leisure hours I can spare, not to watch some attention-craving idiot. (I can do that anytime I want at home by turning on the TV.) The same goes for video games.

I'll also point out that griefers who claim they do it because others take the game too seriously have no grounds to complain when they get banned. After all, it's not like they're losing anything important, right?

-- Steve

Ever consider that perhaps the original article itself was an attempt to draw the ire of the reader? Perhaps to draw up all that rage and emotion from when you, the reader, were the one being TK'ed? A new avenue to "mess with people's lives"? A new place to find those who take it all too seriously?

... a good old article this one. I think the responses amuse more than the original article in some cases.

Cry me a river, people who b*tch about TKing. If people don't want a match that involves TKing, than turn friendly fire off.
Good article, a change is nice.

You do realise How old this is

Anton P. Nym:

Bullshit.

Griefing is all about causing problems for other people. You try to obfuscate that, but it's clear in every line of your post; griefers do it to piss others off, and despite your tapdancing you end up saying so repeatedly. Griefers may rationalise it out as some grand social experiment, or as social commentary, or blame those they grief for deserving what they get... but it's still all about being untouchable and hindering the efforts of others for cheap, selfish pleasure.

Players who take the game too seriously can be tedious, but at least they're playing the same game as the other players and don't prevent them from playing. Griefers aren't even playing the game; they're playing their own game at everyone else's expense. Sorry, but if I step onto a baseball diamond I don't want to stand there watching the pitcher pretend to fellate the ball... I came to play baseball in the few leisure hours I can spare, not to watch some attention-craving idiot. (I can do that anytime I want at home by turning on the TV.) The same goes for video games.

I'll also point out that griefers who claim they do it because others take the game too seriously have no grounds to complain when they get banned. After all, it's not like they're losing anything important, right?

-- Steve

This.

I love you.

Really, seething nerd rage might be funny, and I'm guilty of both griefing and twitching in raw, unfettered sweaty-palmed fury, but nobody likes an asshole. It demonstrates a complete lack of respect for other people, and it's disgusting. Next time you try reading that favourite book of yours and I come in, pull down my pants and take a dump on it, then piss in your face, I bet you won't be laughing too hard.

Easykill:
I never played counter strike much so i cant really relate but I played gears of war a lot and youd be surprised how much the average team killer cares about the game. If someone team kills me I forget about whatever objectives there are in the game and hunt them down for the rest of the game, getting the same anguished crys you talk about. Eventually the offender leaves or ignores everyone but me for the entire game and the problem is solved. This way I get the enjoyment without being as much of a complete prick as you.

Oh god, that was Me! Eugh...

seule, nice necromancy. I liked this article. Well actually, I hated it; but I liked it all the same.

JamesR:
What on Earth possessed the Escapist to publish this? It's not funny ... It's not clever ...

Its just an article about an asshole who likes to ruin other peoples fun for no other reason than he can.

Needless to say, won't be reading anymore of this.

My guess is: you're 15 and play CS...alot!

I don't cause tears, I don't completely ruin the person's day, and if the game gets intense I will buckle down and help my allies. However, we're just the yin to the "serious gamer's" yang.

People don't have fun playing games anymore. Online gaming has made it a much less social experience... maybe this gives credibility to the whole community as more than a bunch of spoiled kids playing expensive toys, but it doesn't make the experience any more fun.

There should be a balance between the serious gamers and the griefers, but I think the less evil griefers are playing the game as it was meant to be played: as a game.

I applaud you, man. I hate teamkillers but I hate over-obsessive losers much much more.

BonsaiK:
I'm not so sure that the original article-writer is the jerk he claims to be. Most TKers can't write that well for a start. I think he's just roleplaying a jerk for the sake of writing an interesting article. Viewed in this context, I think the article is actually a critique of jerks, not an appraisal of them.

And why shouldn't a TKer be able to write that well? He's interested in human behavior, he likes to see how humans react to him beeing a jerk. Even I do what he does, and I get top grades in my class and I'm considered very smart among my peers. I think it's human nature for "intelligent" people to "poke" persons they think are lesser minded and see how they react. Not lesser minded in pure dumb, but persons who are maybe unhealthy obsessed with something (like a game, taking things too serious). Not telling everyone that their are dumb for not TKing and so on. But I just think some people like to observe the human mind and human nature in general.

That is mindset is actually very similar to that of the troll. Shannon should try his hand at trolling also. I think he would love it.

After reading "Will Grief for Fun" article, I thought I would end up feeling sorry for this guy.

After reading this, I don't care what sort of abuse or neglect this kid suffered at the hands of his parents. Some people really are so attention starved that they don't know what to do with themselves.

I'd hate to see how this guy tries to pick up girls: pulling their pigtails?

Now I'm not sure who's more annoying, schmucks who take the game too seriously or schmucks like this who take schadenfreude too seriously.

I can't help but feel that this article is also a part of the author's need to push people's buttons.

"Griefing your own team in Counter-Strike is fun because your average Counter-Strike player treats the game with the seriousness of open heart surgery."

I started to laugh so hard, especially with the General Lee "RUSH RIGHT" quote too.

This article is too true, and I now realize the fun that can be had with TKing.

And the funny thing is, if they were serious players they would play pickups/scrims on private servers and not have a problem with TKers.

The only problem I have with it is the last line.. it's three words too long.

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