Reasons to Play (and Not Play) BioShock

BioShock was released four days ago and is already on most publications' "must buy" lists. Reviews are trending toward 10, and everyone who's anyone in game writing has something to say about it. But should you buy it?

We here at Team Humidor think you should make up your own mind, and to that end, have offered up the following reasons to buy (and not to buy) BioShock.

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So - I'm guessing I need to read Ayn Rand's stuff huh?

*shrugs*

The reasons against were a little half-hearted, so let me provide one:

No matter how great the story or how deep and detailed the gameplay intricacies, this is still a FPS.

That's not to say I think it's a bad game, but as someone who doesn't enjoy FPS games myself I'm far from convinced I need a copy.

I guess that really depends on the reasons you don't like FPSen, because it changes things up quite a bit. For example, if you don't like controlling the player in the first person or shooting things, then this isn't the game for you.

Deus Ex was "still a shooter" when it came out. Bioshock seems to be borrowing the key game mechanic from Undying, which was also still a shooter (instead of one hand casting magic spells and the other using one-handed weapons, the first hand casts "spells" that are supposedly gene-modified abilities.)

This was a weak gee-golly article. I'm dismayed it took a "team" to come up with so little insight.

I think the upbeat view of Bioshock and the somewhat sarcastic negative remarks meant to explain that there really wasn't a good reason to not play Bioshock.

Possibly a good reason not to buy it : you haven't tried the demo yet.

My own list of potential reasons not to play:

1. You're a scared little girl.
2. You're scared of scary-looking little girls.
3. You're Jack Thompson.
4. You're an avid Ayn Rand acolyte.
5. You can't currently afford either a 360 or a PC that has a decent processor and at least a 7800 GT graphics card.

Bioshock killed my 360.

Put me down for a Number Five.

Same here. My PC is, huh, 4 years old.
That said, I think option 3 may be wrong.
Are we sure Thompson doesn't play games, doesn't molest himself at night, only to bash them publicly the day after?

Ian Dorsch:
Bioshock killed my 360.

Fo sho? Is this your first brick?

Russ Pitts:
Fo sho? Is this your first brick?

Yes, and yes. Needless to say, the timing kind of sucks.

Ian Dorsch:

Russ Pitts:
Fo sho? Is this your first brick?

Yes, and yes. Needless to say, the timing kind of sucks.

No joke. I'd say Ayn Rand owes you an Xbox.

To be fair, now your 360 and your copy of Atlas Shrugged serve the same purpose!

Russ Pitts:

Ian Dorsch:

Russ Pitts:
Fo sho? Is this your first brick?

Yes, and yes. Needless to say, the timing kind of sucks.

No joke. I'd say Ayn Rand owes you an Xbox.

Ayn Rand doesn't "owe" you anything. Stop being a parasite!

Archon:

Russ Pitts:

Ian Dorsch:

Russ Pitts:
Fo sho? Is this your first brick?

Yes, and yes. Needless to say, the timing kind of sucks.

No joke. I'd say Ayn Rand owes you an Xbox.

Ayn Rand doesn't "owe" you anything. Stop being a parasite!

Dude, that Xbox came from the sweat of his brow, and she took it from him. She's the parasite.

NO, says the man in Redmond, it belongs to the REPAIR CENTER!

Ian Dorsch:
NO, says the man in Redmond, it belongs to the REPAIR CENTER!

I reject this notion.

Russ Pitts:

Ian Dorsch:
NO, says the man in Redmond, it belongs to the REPAIR CENTER!

I reject this notion.

I chose a place where the developer would not fear the censor. Where the manufacturer would not be constrained by petty morality. Where the great would not be constrained by the small. I chose to build... Sony.

"A creative man is motivated by the desire to achieve, not by the desire to beat others."
-Ayn Rand

So...is she saying that single player Achievements are more noble than multiplayer Achievements?

I think it may be something to do with all achievements being valid, just not gamer scores.

In the Bartle Type paradigm, as an Objectivist, you can be an Achiever or an Explorer. If you're a Socializer then you are Peter Keating from the Fountainhead, and if you're a Killer you're Gayle Wynand.

I'm available 24/7 for further insight into the Objectivist-gamer typology.

Arbre:
Same here. My PC is, huh, 4 years old.
That said, I think option 3 may be wrong.
Are we sure Thompson doesn't play games, doesn't molest himself at night, only to bash them publicly the day after?

The first image that came to mind when you said this was of Ben Stiller in Dodgeball. The electric shock and the donuts. The slice of pizza down the front of his tights... I just see Jack Thompson setting up a system that shocks him everytime he kills someone in any game. And then, playing deep into the night, alternately crying to himself and shouting "BOOM HEADSHOT" into his mic.

Well, dangit, now I've gone and disturbed myself with my own imagination. Yuck.

Ian Dorsch:
So...is she saying that single player Achievements are more noble than multiplayer Achievements?

Considering that most of the early ones are about being a parasite, I'm pretty sure she'd hate Bioshock and all video games, entirely.

Russ Pitts:

Fo sho? Is this your first brick?

err...I hope this level of English will prove to be a unique space-time continuum anomaly for Russ and The Escapist.

sharp_as_a_cork:

Russ Pitts:

Fo sho? Is this your first brick?

err...I hope this level of English will prove to be a unique space-time continuum anomaly for Russ and The Escapist.

You're kidding, right?

"It is not advisable to venture unsolicited opinions. You should spare yourself the embarrassing discovery of their exact value to your listener."
-Ayn Rand

Man, she's got a snappy comeback for everything!

Fo sho.