Zero Punctuation: Sim City Societies

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Good review, and i agree no satisfation in this game "at all!!"

if you are going to play simcity i still recommend simcity 4,
and none else. Rest of them have a lack of "satisfaction and feel of acomplishment"

cheers.

sry no idea why it double postet.. :(

Thankyou! Yahtzee!!!

You communicated clearly the same frustration I had with this game. I feel better now that people know how bad this game is.

Thankgod I got the game free

HSIAMetalKing:
Zvarri, another Wednesday of lulz.

Thank you, Yahtzee.

*snicker*zvarri*snicker*

Because everytime is a good time for a PW reference.

shishikyuu:
I proclaim godwins law.

decent review, lulz was had.

Darn, I was hoping to be in before Godwin.

There hasn't been a real SimCity since SimCity 3000: Unlimited. SC4 felt unfinished, buggy, and with too many features that look tacked-on; typical EA game.

And Societies is a joke that is a SimCity in name only.

Now THAT extra bit was funny, unlike others.

SimCity appeals to the types that build and rebuild their train sets obsessively while secretly plotting to put on the Stay-Puft Marshmellow Man outfit and lay waste to the insect sized inhabitants.

By which I mean to say, I quite like it. Remove all the roads, see what happens, add some of them back, put in a bus stop, wait, use the cheat code for more money, put in another bus stop, see buses driving on the road, smile quietly to yourself while feeling you've accomplished something.

It's a great game for Those Who Like to Fiddle.

That's SimCity 4, though. This one, I'll pass and wait for Spore.

There are, in the whole of the ZP library, a few parts of a few videos that leave me in stitches literally every time I watch them. Try as I may, no matter how many times I watch the review or how well I've memorized it, there are still a few specified seconds, in the hour plus of the ZP lineup, that I literally cannot sit through with a straight face. Among them lie such gems as the introduction to Gareth Gobulcoque, the "Fagballs" jibe at Link, the "sat there picking his nose" line in the Halo 3 review... just a few little points in there that always get me every single time. And now I think I can add the "target practice" line in this one to the list. :D

NSiky:
Edit: So far he's (justifiably) had a dig at Americans, the Japanese, the French, Australians and Anime lovers (who, let's be honest, are on a planet of their own). Thankfully, because Yahtzee's also British, I get impunity from mockery AND I understand jokes which other people won't. Well done on being a Brit, Yahtzee!

You apparantly missed last week where he called the British SAS "a bunch of morally questionable psychotic thugs."

Wyatt:
you on the other hand are upset because you enjoy cartoons and he made some fleeting referance to an entire genra of cartoons that are about kiddy diddling?

Try not to talk about subjects you don't actually understand with people that do, because I can pretty much completely dismiss your entire reasoning on the matter. Compounded with your apparent lack of understanding when it comes to metaphors, you don't really get by saying that he called you things because you misunderstood what he was actually saying. There's also quite a difference between the opinion on the actions of fictional Americans in a video game compared to a comment about an actual group of people.

Garfgarog:
There's also quite a difference between the opinion on the actions of fictional Americans in a video game compared to a comment about an actual group of people.

well now pard you cant have this both ways. see its like this, either hes insulting 'actual groups of people' with his reviews , and i can assure you that there is an actual group of United States Marines and not a one of us that have seen his reviews (and hes loved by all that i know) were offended in the least (check out his COD 4 review time stamp 1:42 - 1:48 where he ends his comments about Marines with the statment 'you know just like in real life' clearly if i was at all inlcined to whine like a 3 year old with a pissy diaper i could take offence at), or hes just expressing an opinion about a fictional group of people , example 'US Marines in a game' or 'manga reading pedos' that are obviously infesting his game of sim societies.

its one way or another.

he didnt say all manga was about kiddy diddlin what he said was that in his city there was a library full of manga that was about kiddy diddlin used to train pedos. and if i recall correct YOUR name didnt come up once. in fact i didnt see or hear him mention any names at all he just pointed out the group of pedos in training that read manga in his game city

but i think at this point the REAL humor is that your still trying to defend kiddy diddlin cartoons as something casual and normal and take offence from the jokes about them by a game reviewer.

Ha, you can almost picture the tears running down his face with the medic bloodying up the place!

Btw, what he says about Nazi Germany, is actually true. That ws how Nazi Germany started ;) The Germans were all emo after WO1, Hitler gave them their "old glory" back by spewing out propaganda about the superiority from the German (Arian) race. The people loved the bombastic and spectacular parades, loved the bombastic art display's and the new impressive building Hitler build all for the propaganda.
Anyway, I think they kind of demolished the Simcity formula, or at least discarded it. Still waiting for a really good follow-up from Simcity 3000 (4...well...nah).

OMFG.... Heavy medic ending was the funniest and TRUEST thing i have ever seen. Hilarious, and true...

i played sim city on the intendo to death, i still boot up sim city 3000 now and then. this is a classic example of games that dont need 'new and inovative' ways to do things. what it did/does need is simply more depth to the crap it allready had.

the fun part about any sim city game was trying to manipulate your people. THAT should have been the focus of all new games right from the start. the fun does NOT come from building shit it comes from how your people respond to what you do. the focus on the game is your 'god head' not the number or size or color of buildings you toss up. when societies change the game from the type of buildings you get being determined by how well you provided basic things in a given area to just letting you plunk down what ever building you wanted any place you wanted they took away a key feedback mechanic of the original games that made them fun. hell some of the best or atleast interesting times in Sim City 3000 is trying to figure out why your row of residential neighborhoods wont spawn tower but instead seems to be stuck in trailer trash hell, or why you cant get the sears towers in your down town and instead get stuck with uncle ahabs slurp-n-go.

i can sum up why societys sucks in one go. it sucks because it stoped being about playing 'god' with your imaginary people and became about the city itself. the city was never what was importiant, it was allways the people you imagined to be in it that was. building the city was just a tool, THEE tool to interact with those lil blips. that changes when you get to make every single decision down to the color of the curtians in your housing projects. when you change the interaction feedback on a game like this from something visual to a graph on a spread sheet you ruin the game for most people. i dont want a bar graph to show me that people are unhappy (or happy for that matter) i want either slums in my city or high rises', i dont want a graph to tell me i have to much traffic i want my little roads stuffed to the scuppers with tiny little dots that are sposed to be cars. i want to SEE my decisions unfold before my eyes not change a set of numbers on a graph someplace change.

i want to SEE a riot break out not just get a mesage about it in some news head line thinggy. the concept isnt hard to understand, in a game like this you create the play ground your 'people' come play in it, by WATCHING them you decide what to build next or what to take away. once you remove the watching them aspect and create a game where every single visual decision about what will happen is in YOUR hands the game stops becoming fun. i recall spendintg ages trying to get farms to spawn in sim city 3000 it was a blast and exciting when i got my first one. but if you remove that and just allow the player to plunk down that farm any time he choose wether or not anyone will actualy move in it just sucks.

Smashing as always

Loved the End I realy must play that that game

Yahtzee u truely Are one of the greatest game review's. Comparing a Game to Nazi germany i just found that so smart xD. one of ur best review i found. Keep Em' coming Good Job. LMAO at "fussy Plebs" remark

AS always, a review well done. And the Heavy/Medic short made me lmao and kinda teary (the sad kind) in one go. Nothing in life does that, except maybe watching a cripple using Micro$oft voice recognition in Word to "type" a report of 1000+ words.

Wyatt:
i played sim city on the intendo to death, i still boot up sim city 3000 now and then. this is a classic example of games that dont need 'new and inovative' ways to do things. what it did/does need is simply more depth to the crap it allready had.

the fun part about any sim city game was trying to manipulate your people. THAT should have been the focus of all new games right from the start. the fun does NOT come from building shit it comes from how your people respond to what you do. the focus on the game is your 'god head' not the number or size or color of buildings you toss up. when societies change the game from the type of buildings you get being determined by how well you provided basic things in a given area to just letting you plunk down what ever building you wanted any place you wanted they took away a key feedback mechanic of the original games that made them fun. hell some of the best or atleast interesting times in Sim City 3000 is trying to figure out why your row of residential neighborhoods wont spawn tower but instead seems to be stuck in trailer trash hell, or why you cant get the sears towers in your down town and instead get stuck with uncle ahabs slurp-n-go.

i can sum up why societys sucks in one go. it sucks because it stoped being about playing 'god' with your imaginary people and became about the city itself. the city was never what was importiant, it was allways the people you imagined to be in it that was. building the city was just a tool, THEE tool to interact with those lil blips. that changes when you get to make every single decision down to the color of the curtians in your housing projects. when you change the interaction feedback on a game like this from something visual to a graph on a spread sheet you ruin the game for most people. i dont want a bar graph to show me that people are unhappy (or happy for that matter) i want either slums in my city or high rises', i dont want a graph to tell me i have to much traffic i want my little roads stuffed to the scuppers with tiny little dots that are sposed to be cars. i want to SEE my decisions unfold before my eyes not change a set of numbers on a graph someplace change.

i want to SEE a riot break out not just get a mesage about it in some news head line thinggy. the concept isnt hard to understand, in a game like this you create the play ground your 'people' come play in it, by WATCHING them you decide what to build next or what to take away. once you remove the watching them aspect and create a game where every single visual decision about what will happen is in YOUR hands the game stops becoming fun. i recall spendintg ages trying to get farms to spawn in sim city 3000 it was a blast and exciting when i got my first one. but if you remove that and just allow the player to plunk down that farm any time he choose wether or not anyone will actualy move in it just sucks.

Cheers to that. :) Spot on the whole way.

Hey guys,

what do you think? Should ZP review a game he really likes next time? Instead of trying to following the thrashing we all can try to follow supercretinesque praise of ZP's favorite title...

I always go bankrupt because my stupid citizens wont pay their taxes. JUST LIKE IN REAL LIFE!

i think he should review what ever interests him. his reviews to date all except this one have left me atleast entertained if not out right laughing my balls off. even the reviews of zelda and mario which i couldnt care less about ive watched a couple times and was left laughing.

it just strikes me that he didnt care enough about this game to make a good review, and i dont mean good as in the game was 'good' but good as in the REVIEW was good. i dont care if he loves a game or hates it, the reviews themselves are what the draw is, but hes atleast got to care about the game hes talking about one way or another to have anything too work with it seems to me.

i will say that the only game hes reviewed that i actualy OWN is "The Witcher" and i found that review to 100% spot on perfect from the point of view that everything he said about it was pointing out the EXACT same complaints i had, so in my opinion hes not only got talent in being able to make us laugh with his reviews but hes also got a clear knack for being RIGHT while he does.

i just hope that he doesnt end up being forced to push or slam games based on economic decisions by his bosses (or even his own) its refreshing to see a review thats both funny and is true. too many reviewers spend pages praising high points and using buzz words that mean nothing and tack on a few 'very minor flaws' paragraph on the end of their reviews of games that turn out to be total shit, because 4 pages of praise was about the amazing ability to change hair styles and the tacked on 'minor flaws' were that your PC crashed every 5 minuts even assuming you could get the game to even install in the first place. all this 'reviewing' of corse is done with economic drives being the most importiant factor.

so far atleast yahtzee seems to be reviewing games based on nothing more than his real and actual opinion of the game in question with no company shills standing behind him as hes recording, stuffing a $100 in his pocket every time he says something nice, and cutting their add payments to his parent sight every time he doesnt.

i dont begrudge any man the ability to make a living, his trick is gunna be 'keeping it real' as he does.

i cant help it... i just really would like to see him dissin metroid prime 3 XD (no misunderstandings here, its my favorite game :P )

this actually made me cry, beautiful work, you are a great artist. Keep it up.

wow fantastic , your reviews always make me laugh . :D

btw Tf2 is an Awesome game!!!!!!!!

Hahaha the weeaboos are out in force on this one.

Great job, Yahtzee!

I know people who lust after Jeremy Clarkson! I just lust after the cars he drives and The Stig.

This got me playing my SNES version of the old Sim City again. I still get a vague amount of pleasure building up a large, albeit shitty city by leaving it on overnight to reap in the rewards of a 100 years worth of unfair taxes, then burning the lot of them or causing numerous plane crashes or a bowser attack and so on.

A game which allows you to choose which disasters you subject your people too is just irresistible sometimes. Most of the time, I grant you, it's fairly empty.

I must say, I've been addicted to your reviews so far and have watched them multiple times since I first found this website.

This review made me laugh so hard it hurt.

Where in the Sam Hill did you get the disgusting pan pipe version of the vile Joe Cocker - Up Where We Belong? Springing that from the bowels of all that is evil was a truly unsportsmanlike trick to play on an unsuspecting viewer. Aside from that, a solid B+.

Yahtzee:
I'm toddling off to San Francisco for GDC...
For this reason there's no review this week, but if you'll let me finish my sentence before you start throwing things, the Escapist will be releasing the shorts I made for the GDC award ceremony at around midnight on Wednesday, in place of a review. Perhaps they will keep you mollified.

So my question is:
Midnight in which timezone?

Damn, they were so happy, the medic was still laughing before he got stabbed... i find that lil video quite disturbing, like seriously...

But i like the way he choses the medic and the heavy, they are the perfect match if you have played the game, and also the way the spy went for the medic, which are key targets. Probably did it on purpose.

hahahah XD i loved this review XD so far i haven't heard of anyone thata likes SCS xP thata game really sucks! . I'm still playing my SC4 :D is way better than SCS =/

why dont people realize that you will get banned by celebrating that ur the first person to post?

Nice review. As Always.
Since That review is somewhat educational and doesn't exactly make me turn my pretty head away from any of the games unless it's another FPS .-. So i'm gonna post my own ideas about 'god/building' games i've tried.

o.O Well first of all the list of games i've played: the Sims, Sims2,Immortal Cities: Children Of The Nile, B&W2 along with AOE2 and AOM and recently been hooked by Pharaoh: Cleopatra ._.

Don't think i ever played SCS before tho kinda been wanting to try it out to see if it's more less challenging or at least fun also been kinda eying the Zeus Master Of Olympus game. Unsure about that one.

My Fave part of Pharaoh would be adding plazas to the road. But Ppl in that game are indeed like normal ppl...needy Sons of bulldogs the more you give, the more they want and if you take it away even if only for a moment they throw the emo tantrum and run to sulk in the corner. If it wasn't for necessity to actually provide them the stuff due to a mission i'd prolly just end up make 4x6 squares of homes connected by one long road with everything on it. with maybe some entertainment at each ends and all the stuff in the middle o.O but that would make it a hella long road to travel = less efficient ._. so yea you still end up making 4x6(or smaller/bigger if you feel like it)squares with all the stuff surrounding them, cept industrial buildings which you somehow gotta place far enough not to affect desirability and still actually work ._. and late at night or early morning you gonna find yourself sketching on a notebook new and better ways to give them everything they want without making them all run around the city like rats in a labyrinth made of cheese, cos simply they wouldn't know which wall to start eating without ending up noses together with another rat and having to fight to bite... would be rather better if it was possible to add routes o.O or at least use arrows or something. cos come on how many times you gonna be lost about which way to turn on the same crossroad you have gotten to last 5 hundred+ times ._.
all and all playable i guess, tho i really dislike the exact needed item for upgrade thing cos even if you're giving them everything they could ever want they're not gonna upgrade cos they're missing that one item ._. rawr.

IC:CotN ..well food= money so means you have to work twice as hard to end up buying more food o.O it is basically a cross breed between Pharaoh and Sims2 just bit more "ancient" and "unique" well kinda is for a "god game" you are actually a pharaoh who somehow needs to have his palace built before arrival, grows old too fast and could get killed by a mugger or kinda made "stop" being a pharaoh by angry mob of unsatisfied ppl who're too impatient to wait for things to get better and instead of going to shop and BUYING stuff they need picket in front of noble houses and complain in generally ._. not exactly fun for someone who just likes nice graphics and building stuff. The fun thing about it is that you can name everyone one of them whatever you want You can have actual Harry the Potter o.O or Name the Pharaoh Imhotep and all his siblings after various other ancient Egyptian bad asses. or name all the nobles after known vampires and put huge walls around their houses. Or give some soldiers names of all known action heroes. Or just fun to watch Bill Gates be a villager who's picking Pomegranates all the stars some minor scribes and servant pplo.O and you being the almighty Pharaoh.

B&W2 - Badly Arranged World 2.
erm Black And White 2 i mean ...
that game is somewhat different from previously mentioned by actually having the "paw on pulse" thing o.O i kinda wondered if ppl in the game actually see the hand or not and if god indeed only needed one hand to build the world...well that explains alot of things since you can't help but wonder what he needed the other hand for....
Plus instead of having a Godzilla breaking havoc on your newly built city you get to have a pet that does that to other newly built cities ^_^ .tho it's kinda limited to actually build. pet could be unleashed- literally too btw- to do all kinds of things o.O
like eat own shit.o.O thus never having to go on a diet from eating too much cholesterol filled food like rocks, trees and ppl.
getting more ppl in the game is certainly unique. o.o you basically need to rub 2 ppl together to make one of them pregnant and other one go and rub some more unless you have a female dedicated to do that then basically nothing happens. which basically is a vague hint that women - that 4 letter S+plural s word only doing for the other 3 letter S word and no consequences o.o and the mission in the game accuses you(the player) of having an intercourse with one of the females which along with few other things makes it a rather sexist game ._.
and having the ability to choose to be either good or evil is kinda bit messed up o.O cos if you need something built fast out of wood to make ppl happy you need to pick trees up -evil then somehow sawmill them in your hand to dust and turn into perfectly piled stack of wood ._. or just place inside building to make it build faster - good .so in the end you're still gonna end up being somewhat in between unless you only use trees to kill ppl which would mean you're not getting anywhere since there's a pretty strict storyline .-. where in latter missions enemies keep getting 2x as stronger all alone and joining forces with other enemies which makes it a really long pain in the neck crazy fast trying to build a city and an army capable of at least keeping everyone from dying in first 30 mins.
then try to build a bigger army to beat nearly impossible foes who not only got help from each other seem to be able to use "special GOD powers" from start while you have to keep buying saunas and stuff just to keep ppl happy enough not to keep complaining all the time. and prolly won't either make enough points t get anything good nor prolly get a chance to use it o.O plus some side quests are kinde funky O.o. especially if you find out you needed to buy some extra ability to do stuff and when you wasted all of them to buy more better buildings for your ungrateful pi...i mean people. oh well still somewhat fun to watch the catfight or set trees on fire and throw them around like Molotov cocktails .and watch stuff burn XP.

Sims and Sims 2 ._. is more detailed city/human building game, you get to design each and every house along with some businesses cept for the ingame ones you don't even use.
fun for sadistic ppl to torment their "creations" that have some relation to real live people who prolly aren't even aware of what's done with their virtual counterparts. -kinda makes me wish to remove the O out of it tho cos that'd describe them well-, but maybe that's for the better . or they might decide to get some Sims2 similar chat thingy and make you join it just so they can do all the stuff back and watch your reaction as well.
Sims 2- with a large group of friends and possibility that last expansion indeed stays last you're only gonna need just that. since with each new one you just need last one so you can just buy latest one , lend original game and all expansions from friends and not pay a cent for the rest ._. tho in the end it will only be worth it for that last person with latest one who has those friends. unless you agree to trade using expansions for certain time for say ability to install the original :P

AOE 1&2 and AOM - Age Of Empires and Age Of Mythology.
More Strategy and Fighting Games than others i guess o.O unless you build 4 bombard/tower thick walls around your little farm and do nothing. or in AOM+ Titans just build a forest around yourself and never need a thing and not worry about enemies unless they bring peasants which can be easily killed by say having some random flying attacking or really good ranged creature O.o can't really say much bout cept they don't need as much planning where to build stuff, you don't have to care what ppl want and you can make anyone attack anyone. you could even use give line of sight power with turn trees to ents power and ct down on the enemies resources by making them fight against each other. tho my fave godpower is turn to pigs one. o.O just think about it instead of just killing your enemies you turn them to food which can be eaten and literally gain their strength even if it is just getting more resources out of them against THEIR will.

that's all i'm gonna say for now. it's rather early here and this is already rather too long for a comment about a video of a game i haven't even played xD.

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