Zero Punctuation: God of War: Chains of Olympus

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"Or as I like to call it, the 'fuck you' button."

I laughed my ass off so much at that. Way to go Yahtzee on another awesome review!

What I don't get is why it showed you playing with a controller next to a TV when the game was for PSP.

Grampy_bone:
Oh come on, DMC and God of war were so similar Jaffe had major problems even getting funding for the game. Everyone he talked to saw it as a derivitive DMC knock-off (of which there were already dozens) and didn't want to throw another bomb.

God of War is nothing more than macho-fantasy violence-porn; a game's whose popularity is based on the fact that it allows a bunch of whiny losers to feel powerful for once in their lives. Kratos is a psychopath who is rewarded with godhood for commiting mass-murder, only taking a break from slaughtering innocent lives in order to bang two chicks at once. How Xtreme!!!! When I first played it I thought it was so ridiculous I was sure it had to be a satire. Oh and also it manages to shit all over every greek myth. When did Pandora's box make mortals into power rangers? Make my Kratos GROOOOOOOOOOOOOWWW!!!

When half-assing it like that, anything can sound bad, DMC included: DMC, when speaking in the same analytically diminishing terms as you're speaking in, is nothing more than a paint-by-numbers hack-and-slash who's fame comes from the fact that it pioneered a sub-genre from which only two or three games series are worth noting everything else being a one-shot game or utter shit. Dante is a cocky punk (who makes an even worse "cool and calm badass" as shown by DMC2) who's flair as a character comes from nothing more than his abilitiy to seamlessly slay demons while making a trash-talking a-hole out of himself, only stopping with the fighting to further focus on his narcissistic taunting. Not to mention how it takes beings and such from multiple mythologies (Greek included) and desecrates them into a modern-day goth goth run. Since when was the ruler of hell a three-eyed blob stuck in a statue? Since when was Echidna a Poison Ivy wannabe? Since when was Lucifer a back-pack that shot out red blades?

Making good things sound shitty is never fun though.

(two hundred fourtenth)

reveiw the other god of war games if your gonna do a chains of olympus

Let's face it-this is a stress release game for people (such as myself) who have to assuage the homicidal rage they feel towards the retarded twats they're surrounded by in a manner that does not involve a jail sentence and the inevitable ass rape-age that follows.

Jade-Scale:
First comment!

That aside, I played the game and I wasn't really impressed. I really think the PSP suffers without that second analog nub. I use mine for a few games here and there, but mostly for the PS3 compatibility. I really don't think this game is worth it when there's games like Patapon and LocoRoco out there.

http://img337.imageshack.us/img337/3687/deadpoolstfumg4.jpg

God of Bore My Ass.

crampy:
God of Bore My Ass.

Necro much?

HUBILUB:

crampy:
God of Bore My Ass.

Necro much?

Not god of bore my ass, god of bore my ass.
([Something] my ass is used to say that what someone said was a load of shit. Aussie slang I'm pretty sure.)

crampy:

HUBILUB:

crampy:
God of Bore My Ass.

Necro much?

Not god of bore my ass, god of bore my ass.
([Something] my ass is used to say that what someone said was a load of shit. Aussie slang I'm pretty sure.)

now i am just as guilty as the above poster but i feel that after a year and a bit he deserves to be told what necroing is, the act of necroing is posting in a thread that has been dead or inactive for an extended period of time.

THE MORE YOU KNOW!!!!!

My girlfriend secretly wants to fuck you.

And I will let her.

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