149: I've Got to be a Macho Man

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I've Got to be a Macho Man

At the time of its release, Gears of War was arguably the most technically impressive game ever created. Its production values are as high as the very best games have managed, before or since. The developers even managed to distinguish it from the pack, deciding that desaturation controls were put in Photoshop for a reason, and they're bloody well going to use them. So, what's the problem?

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A good read although as I read through the article I couldn't help constantly thinking "What kind of people would take a game like Gears of War so seriously?" I thought the over the top macho characters were am amusing throwback to games like DOOM and Duke Nukem.

I'm getting sick and tired of games and gamers who seem to want it all. When I played GoW, I wasn't expecting a harrowing tale about the last hope of humanity. I was expecting a mindless shooter with mindless characters and that's exactly what I got. You can call me stupid for enjoying such a game but I don't really care because the key word is "game", its not meant to be taken seriously, its meant to be a source of entertainment.

I've strayed into a bit of a rant here. It just annoys me how seriously people take video games sometimes. I don't enjoy fan boys and 12 year old douche bags screaming "fag" down their mic's on Xbox Live but in my opinion the kind of people who think they are too good to play a game like Gears of War and enjoy it for what it is are just as bad.

Good article, I'll look forward to more.

GoW really is a closet homosexual's dream game. I mean for this title to be so incredibly successful there must be a HECK of a lot of insecure guys out there.

I bought it based on the hype, but after a few hours trying not to laugh at the 12 year-old's idea of what tough guy dialogue sounds like, and trying not to laugh at the homo-erotic OVERcurrents, and trying TO laugh at the horrible Albert-Speer-inspired architecture, and trying to come to terms with the fact that in the future everything is built like Fort Knox and grey on grey (hey, we've had COLOUR TV for donkey's years), I just gave up.

Most over-hyped game in history as far as I'm concerned. And really, if you like this stuff, ask yourself if you need to live the lie that you like girls your whole life. I mean nowadays we're all liberal on issues of sexuality - it's really okay if guys like other guys. It's not something that dudes need to hide anymore.

So I guess I don't agree with the writer's conclusions - yeah, this game is laughable - but not joyously so. Most of it is just bad, and it's way too serious (and too sexually confused) for its own good.

By the way, I hear GoW2 is in the making. I'll be keeping an eye out to see which of my friends likes it a bit too much, LOL.

Beery:
GoW really is a closet homosexual's dream game. I mean for this title to be so incredibly successful there must be a HECK of a lot of insecure guys out there.

I bought it based on the hype, but after a few hours trying not to laugh at the 12 year-old's idea of what tough guy dialogue sounds like, and trying not to laugh at the homo-erotic OVERcurrents, and trying not to laugh at the horrible Albert-Speer-inspired architecture and the fact that everything was grey on grey (hey, we've had COLOUR TV for donkey's years), I just gave up.

Most over-hyped game in history as far as I'm concerned. And really, if you like this stuff, ask yourself if you need to live the lie that you like girls your whole life. I mean nowadays we're all liberal on issues of sexuality - it's really okay if guys like other guys. It's not something that dudes need to hide anymore.

A lot of people complain about hype but nowadays its just part of the marketing of games. Am I saying Gears of War wasn't an over hyped game and ultimately didn't live up to what was promised? No, in fact, I agree. But its just the way games are sold in modern times, live with it.

On another note it disheartens me that people think saying stuff like "If you like this game you are clearly some kid of closet homosexual" is any better than shouting "fag" at someone over Xbox Live, it isn't. There are clearly jokes to be had about the characters and dialogue in Gears of War but what the hell were people expecting? I saw an action game, I played an action game. I don't know where people come off complaining about Gears of War on the basis that gays-in-denial would only enjoy such rampant macho BS as if there isn't some genuine entertainment to be had from this game because of that fact.

People these days are taking video games way too seriously. Its a "macho" game, or I guess what people think "macho" is, but does that mean it isn't fun. Is there something I am missing in the rulebook of games that dictates that I should only buy games that prove how liberal, intelligent and open-minded I am?

Bah, I think I'm not going to take any more life lessons from games and just stick to playing games for fun (Its so crazy it just might work)

"it disheartens me that people think saying stuff like "If you like this game you are clearly some kid of closet homosexual" is any better than shouting "fag" at someone over Xbox Live, it isn't."

You're confused. Calling someone a 'closet homosexual' is not the same as calling them a homosexual AT ALL. 'Closet' is the operative word. While there's nothing at all wrong with being homosexual there IS definitely something wrong with the idea that it's healthy to hide your sexual identity.

This game's only value, as far as I can see, is in helping certain people pretend to be macho while clutching their joystick and avoiding the company of the opposite sex.

And really, if you like this stuff, ask yourself if you need to live the lie that you like girls your whole life

I like Gears of War, aaaaaand yeah, I am pretty sure I prefer chicks to dudes.

Instead of making a real response to you specifically, I'm just going to hope you're being a complete jack-ass on purpose and just trying to get a rise out of people.

Anyway, I wasn't aware there was THAT much hatred for the look of Gears of War. I mean, personally, I didn't care until people kept making jokes about it. "So what? It's just an art style". I mean, that's how I looked at it. If you check out the graphics for Fable, people's hands and feet are too big. Is it a flaw? I prefer to think of it as an art style (one I very much like, too).

I've always been a fan of games that attempt to simulate warfare, and Gears does a pretty damn good job of it. Gears 2 looks to do an even better job. I'm hoping you get huge battlefields like in the original Halo or in certain areas of Call of Duty 4 as well as the enclosed combat. I mean, that's pretty much why I'm playing the game, and it does a fantastic job at it. I look at Gears of War as one of the next evolutions of shooting games. Particularly, ditch the first person view since third person allows for so many more gameplay possibilities.

However, there is one thing I don't like. That whole "doesn't take itself too seriously" thing is, in one way, true, but I don't think Epic really had their mind made up. As you progress through the game, a shit ton of back story is constantly hinted at, but you never get to it. All that happens are quick, less than a minute cut-scenes that push the basic action plot forward. If there was no backstory, fine. But there is, and they did try to give their characters depth, but they did nothing with it. Something similar happened to Metal Arms: Glitch in the System, but unfortunately that's never getting a sequel (especially since Swingin' Ape was swallowed up by Blizzard).

The setting for Gears is simple enough, but I can't stand when a game adds in story elements that they never dig deeper into.

Lastly: people just need to accept something as being FUN for a change. Gears of War needs to be considered for its gameplay FIRST, and its gameplay is completely solid. Everything else comes second because IT IS A VIDEO GAME. I'm all for games that can deliver all three, but Jesus Christ, stop taking yourself seriously and play Earth Defense Force 2017 for a change. Sure, rapid-fire rocket launchers are a ridiculous idea, but God dammit they're fun.

It's like movies. Not everything is going to be a masterpiece like, say, Suicide Kings. Sometimes you just need to watch a movie like "The One", because it's fun to watch Jet Li beat the shit out of himself in totally unrealistic ways.

Unrelated to the main article, I have to comment on the My Chemical Romance thing...
I'm 19, right inbetween your 12 and 30 year old example.

Some days, I can't stop laughing whenever I hear it. But place it against the right sort of setting, or I just need to amp myself up for something, and Welcome to the Black Parade is suddenly the most inspiring and awesome song.

To tie it back to the article... I can laugh at Gears from a distance, and especially laugh at people who foam at the mouth about it when they're NOT playing it. But sit me down in front of it, and my social clock ticks back 5 years and I'm hunched over the controller, screaming "F***ING FAGGOT" down the headset every time I get killed.

It's interesting to note the overlap with sexuality, especially when I myself am bisexual. I just like using the term "fag" as a generic insult anyway, it's so... par for the course. It's not overly heavy-handed, and it distresses insecure brats, right-wing macho men and bleeding-heart liberals alike.

Real men play Viva Pinata.

Sniper_Zegai:
A good read although as I read through the article I couldn't help constantly thinking "What kind of people would take a game like Gears of War so seriously?" I thought the over the top macho characters were am amusing throwback to games like DOOM and Duke Nukem.

I'm getting sick and tired of games and gamers who seem to want it all. When I played GoW, I wasn't expecting a harrowing tale about the last hope of humanity. I was expecting a mindless shooter with mindless characters and that's exactly what I got. You can call me stupid for enjoying such a game but I don't really care because the key word is "game", its not meant to be taken seriously, its meant to be a source of entertainment.

I've strayed into a bit of a rant here. It just annoys me how seriously people take video games sometimes. I don't enjoy fan boys and 12 year old douche bags screaming "fag" down their mic's on Xbox Live but in my opinion the kind of people who think they are too good to play a game like Gears of War and enjoy it for what it is are just as bad.

Good article, I'll look forward to more.

Unlike Duke Nukem, GoW took itself seriously, so if it wasn't supposed to be taken seriously then I missed it.

ElArabDeMagnifico:

Unlike Duke Nukem, GoW took itself seriously, so if it wasn't supposed to be taken seriously then I missed it.

I don't really understand this statement. How can anyone think GoW takes itself so seriously? When you have a 2 meter tall tank Cole screaming at every moment: "Yeah, whhoo baby!!!!"? As the article says, this is ridiculously fun. And if it isn't your taste, no problem. It's the same thing as the Naked Gun films. A lot of people love its terrible jokes, others don't understand it at all.

Very nice article by the way

Sniper_Zegai:
When I played GoW, I wasn't expecting a harrowing tale about the last hope of humanity. I was expecting a mindless shooter with mindless characters and that's exactly what I got. You can call me stupid for enjoying such a game but I don't really care because the key word is "game", its not meant to be taken seriously, its meant to be a source of entertainment.

You just summed up my feelings. Gears isn't supposed to be about why you do what you do, it's about how you do it. Gameplay, not story. It isn't supposed to make you think, it isn't supposed to be realistic, it's supposed to be an outlet to beat some Locust, or 12-year-olds if you play on Live.

Two things about _Gears_ that I thought were very smart:

One, Lieutenant Kim. Asians in games tend to be portrayed as intellectual at the expense of more physical gifts, or else possessing some mystical strength derived from their spirituality. Here was one Asian that was portrayed as big and virile as any Westerner without a hint of computer skills, drunken boxing, or early childhood training by warrior monks. Don't want to give any spoilers, but the game sort of implies that he's the second most capable/courageous soldier behind Fenix, too.

Two, the 'medieval' feel of the game. Between the 'Lancers' used as melee weapons, the ridiculous armor, the spiked ball-and-chain flail-like grenades, the way the Stranded fortified themselves, and just the aesthetic of all the ruins, I felt like the game took its style cues from a pop culture idea of the dark ages instead of from sci-fi or even Mad Max like other futuristic shooters, which was kinda original. The Locust reminded me more of barbarian invaders than any sort of aliens--anyone else get that impression?

Beery:

Most over-hyped game in history as far as I'm concerned. And really, if you like this stuff, ask yourself if you need to live the lie that you like girls your whole life. I mean nowadays we're all liberal on issues of sexuality - it's really okay if guys like other guys. It's not something that dudes need to hide anymore.

...

By the way, I hear GoW2 is in the making. I'll be keeping an eye out to see which of my friends likes it a bit too much, LOL.

Umm, why are you keeping an eye out for which of your friends is a closeted homosexual?

Maybe you should be asking *yourself* a few questions... ;-D

Sibren:

ElArabDeMagnifico:

Unlike Duke Nukem, GoW took itself seriously, so if it wasn't supposed to be taken seriously then I missed it.

I don't really understand this statement. How can anyone think GoW takes itself so seriously? When you have a 2 meter tall tank Cole screaming at every moment: "Yeah, whhoo baby!!!!"? As the article says, this is ridiculously fun. And if it isn't your taste, no problem. It's the same thing as the Naked Gun films. A lot of people love its terrible jokes, others don't understand it at all.

Very nice article by the way

Ok so token black man says some jokes, big deal, it still took itself too seriously.

I wonder, if the COG soldiers werent built like tanks but everything else stayed the same would people be so quick to cry brokeback mountain about it? Are there homoerotic undertones in GoW? There certainly are if you go looking for them. I certainly dont see how it can be considered a game for closet homosexuals, & besides masculinity & homosexuality are not incompatible; not every gay is a "fag." Unless, that is, you arbitrarily define your masculinity by what causes a stir in your trousers in such a binary way; but thats a whole other debate.

Its a decent game, not exactly my cup of tea but I like the multiplayer (though not the people who play it, as with most Xbox games). I quite liked the gothic art style, was a bit monochrome but it suited the game atmosphere well I thought.

As for taking itself seriously, I guess in ways it did. But personally I think anyone who plays a game "seriously" is in for a dissapointment, especially if you expect it from a AAA title about space marines fighting wierd insect alien locust things. I didnt think it felt like it was taking itself too seriously, but this thread reads like a few people expected a serious game & lament that it wasnt serious enough by attacking what little there was. Like the article said, GoW is like films in the vein of Bad Boys II or Aliens etc. It was silly & melodramatic, but it was entertaining. Entertaining, the point of a "game." If you wanted an interactive Fritz Lang film, you wont find it here; but you'd be a fool for looking.

ElArabDeMagnifico:

Sibren:

ElArabDeMagnifico:

Unlike Duke Nukem, GoW took itself seriously, so if it wasn't supposed to be taken seriously then I missed it.

I don't really understand this statement. How can anyone think GoW takes itself so seriously? When you have a 2 meter tall tank Cole screaming at every moment: "Yeah, whhoo baby!!!!"? As the article says, this is ridiculously fun. And if it isn't your taste, no problem. It's the same thing as the Naked Gun films. A lot of people love its terrible jokes, others don't understand it at all.

Very nice article by the way

Ok so token black man says some jokes, big deal, it still took itself too seriously.

Hardly, some of the community took it seriously but the game was never set up as a serious game. Any game in my opinion has some aspect of it that does not takes itself serious, some humour if you will.

Many gamers on any Online service are "In the closet", not just in Gears of War. This is nothing new, just because people play Gears that does not make them "Trapped in the closet". If anything people who buy Dead or Alive beach Volleyball are gay, just they want to fool themselves into thinking they are not.

Thing is - how is it that everbody is so certain that Gears' super-macho act is not intentionally cheesy? I somehow managed to play through it without coming into contact with internet opinion on the matter, and as I played I kept thinking to myself 'haha they are so doing this on purpose' and laughing out loud at the (in my opinion) intentionally rubbish dialogue. How can people so confidently proclaim that 'it takes itself seriously'? Perhaps the 'non taking yourself seriously' element is just not quite as pronounced as in Duke.

Can anyone say that gears takes itself seriously after looking at Fenix's jaw?

Beery:
GoW really is a closet homosexual's dream game. I mean for this title to be so incredibly successful there must be a HECK of a lot of insecure guys out there.

The hilarious thing is how completely devoid of irony this is.

Cheeze_Pavilion:
Two things about _Gears_ that I thought were very smart:

One, Lieutenant Kim. Asians in games tend to be portrayed as intellectual at the expense of more physical gifts, or else possessing some mystical strength derived from their spirituality. Here was one Asian that was portrayed as big and virile as any Westerner without a hint of computer skills, drunken boxing, or early childhood training by warrior monks. Don't want to give any spoilers, but the game sort of implies that he's the second most capable/courageous soldier behind Fenix, too.

Two, the 'medieval' feel of the game. Between the 'Lancers' used as melee weapons, the ridiculous armor, the spiked ball-and-chain flail-like grenades, the way the Stranded fortified themselves, and just the aesthetic of all the ruins, I felt like the game took its style cues from a pop culture idea of the dark ages instead of from sci-fi or even Mad Max like other futuristic shooters, which was kinda original. The Locust reminded me more of barbarian invaders than any sort of aliens--anyone else get that impression?

I like the way you think.

See, I see attempts at fun and seriousness in this. I mean, it's not like Epic went out to make a parody or anything. They wanted a game that was certainly fun, but I do believe they took a lot of the look, the combat, the style, and even story elements seriously.

People say the writing was rubbish, but honestly, I don't mind it. The writing is not blatantly horrible. Or maybe it is if you got your underwear so tight up your ass you may as well be wearing a thong. I mean, if you people are so critical of the smallest things, you must really hate life. There's a lot more simple and stupid shit to entertain than there is high brow art. Then again, maybe you just want to feel like some ivory tower asshat that's above everyone else. To me, that sounds more like a superiority complex.

I like the Cole Train. Firstly, because the idea of a former athlete jumping into the war willingly? That's not something I'd EVER expect to see in OUR world, so already they've got a respectful character. But even then, me and my brother are playing on co-op, the first time he ever played the game, and as soon as we reach Cole and hear "You need glasses suckah! DAYUM! Bring it on suckah! This is my kinda shit!", he laughs and says "I'm gonna like this guy!". Why? Because the character is....wait for it...it's coming.....FUN!

I mean, haven't any of you guys dropped smack on the computer at any time? I've sat there playing Halo, and when tossing a plasma grenade shouted "CATCH!" or "TAKE IT!". I just get into it. Maybe it's a throwback to watching too much Ninja Turtles as a kid, but part of the fun is to just make that kind of "I'm a bad ass" series of comments when you play. They did it in Republic Commando as well. The characters made comments, and they bantered between each other. It makes the characters that much more real. Haven't you ever had banter with your own friends? Do you even have any friends?

I dunno. I think part of the fun in Gears of War is how the characters themselves are fun. I really could care less if they are hulking monstrosities. When I play online, I play the guy with the helmet since he's got a more natural body type. I like the physical appearance of characters like that better, sure, but I'm not insanely bothered by the muscle bound look, either.

Maybe the people taking the game too seriously are the people that have a problem with it "taking itself too seriously".

Yes, I think some people take games way too seriously. I didn't care much for Gears of War but that was because the gameplay didn't appeal to me. It did what it was supposed to do, perfectly. It's a 100% adrenaline, over-the-top testosterone-fest in the flavor of Wolfenstein 3D and Duke Nukem. It's not supposed to be cultured, it's supposed to be ridiculous. Enjoy it!

It's also popular at the moment to hate all things American and, to a lesser extent, all things Western. Gears of War is distinctly Western and wholly inspired by 80's Americana. Since the 1920's it has been a fad of the uppercrust in America to look at all things foreign as cultured and sophisticated. Both of these sentiments are simply being passed down to the shallow and impressionable teenager attempting to prove himself to others.

Interesting article, and some interesting posts in this thread as well.

One thing I noticed in Gears that's been touched on a bit in this thread is that the game, while predominantly over-the-top machismo, did have some serious elements. As the game goes on it seems more and more like the over-the-top machismo is in a large part a cover for the fact that most or all of the CoGs are scared out of their minds. Marcus even mentions it directly to Dom at one point, when Dom admits to being afraid of going underground -- "Don't tell Baird. He's scared shitless as it is." And that's all part and parcel with the 1980s sci-fi space marine thing that seems to have been the main influence on the game outside of Resident Evil 4.

The blatantly American nature of Gears and Epic's parking lot full of expensive cars also bring to mind kind of an interesting parallel. Silicon Knights, a bunch of artistes who put extraordinary effort into setting and narrative in their games but whose games are also not known for their technical execution, don't seem to have gotten along very well with Epic. Silicon Knights are a bunch of Canadians from the quiet Ontario town of St. Catharines. I don't think there are any Ferraris in the SK parking lot.

Beery:
You're confused. Calling someone a 'closet homosexual' is not the same as calling them a homosexual AT ALL. 'Closet' is the operative word. While there's nothing at all wrong with being homosexual there IS definitely something wrong with the idea that it's healthy to hide your sexual identity.

While I agree that "fag" and "closet homosexual" are different, it doesn't necessarily follow that CALLING someone a "fag" is much different from calling them a "closet homosexual". Both are insults in the context Zegai described, and their intended purpose is the same (to hurt someone's feelings). Zegai's point has merit.

There are notable exceptions to this rule, however. Games like Devil May Cry get a pass because objecting to its aesthetic reveals yourself to be culturally illiterate, the sort of RPG fan who'd reject a Final Fantasy game on the grounds of characters using too much hairspray. But the double standard is kind of obvious - they find redeeming value in another culture's juvenalia while rejecting wholesale their own. Juvenalia with a sense of exoticism passes the test on its exoticism alone.

Or, it could it be that Gears of Wars' "aesthetic" is just objectively ugly.

I played this game co-op with a friend and had a blast. I never cared for the story or characters, except when it was so absurd that it was hilarious, as mentioned in the article. The gameplay was fun and enjoyable with everything else pretty much being background noise, kind of like a Mario or Zelda game.

I also never found the game to be bursting with the gay either. I mean, I guess maybe you could make the conjecture that because of their ridiculous bodies it focuses on hyper-masculinism, but other than that, I can't see the gay. I've never really seen hyper-masculinism very gay either. Maybe if they went around slapping each others ass and grabbing each others balls...

Ajar:
I don't think there are any Ferraris in the SK parking lot.

Have SK had any mega-successful games?

Kieron, great article, as always.

Chalee:
Thing is - how is it that everbody is so certain that Gears' super-macho act is not intentionally cheesy? I somehow managed to play through it without coming into contact with internet opinion on the matter, and as I played I kept thinking to myself 'haha they are so doing this on purpose' and laughing out loud at the (in my opinion) intentionally rubbish dialogue. How can people so confidently proclaim that 'it takes itself seriously'? Perhaps the 'non taking yourself seriously' element is just not quite as pronounced as in Duke.

Can anyone say that gears takes itself seriously after looking at Fenix's jaw?

I picked the game up after watching the 'Mad World' commercial. I got the very distinct impression from the ad that it was a dark and intense story, so I assumed that's what I was signing up for.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ccWrbGEFgI8

It's not bad that it's a cheesy sci-fi story, but the marketing team pulled a Halo 3 with the commercial by making the game seem way more dark & serious than it really was. It's not a bad game, it's just...the commercial made me think I was getting a really dark, meaty story and then I got fluff.

ElArabDeMagnifico:
Unlike Duke Nukem, GoW took itself seriously, so if it wasn't supposed to be taken seriously then I missed it.

Exactly. It takes itself seriously and it's about the most homo-erotic game in existence. What else am I supposed to get from it other than it's SERIOUSLY aimed at closet gays who act all macho to hide the fact that they don't want anyone to know that they REALLY like the company of men more than the company of women.

Cheeze_Pavilion:
Umm, why are you keeping an eye out for which of your friends is a closeted homosexual?

Maybe you should be asking *yourself* a few questions... ;-D

Firstly, I've been married - to a woman - for twenty years and I have a daughter. I also have gay friends. If I was gay, unlike GoW fans I'd have some clues by now.

The reason I'll be keeping an eye out for GoW2 fans is that it's not healthy to hide one's sexual identity. Some folks seem to get into the GoW macho thing a little too much for their own well-being, if you get my meaning.

Novan Leon:
Gears of War is distinctly Western and wholly inspired by 80's Americana.

1940s Nazi-ana more like. Heck, the '80s was the decade of androgynous clothing and big hair, not the butt-slapping steroid-pumping jocks that we get in GoW. If it's not Germany in the 1940s it must be the US in the McCarthy era, because I've never seen any game that suppresses its sexual themes with such seriousness. It's like James Cameron's 'Aliens' for the Me Generation. I mean if they want to make a game like this, why don't they just go all the way and call it "Hunky Men Together in Nature with Big Guns" or perhaps "Back Door Ex-Cons vs. the Alien Horde"? And the dialogue - my God! Other than having characters say "Oh Lance, your rifle is longer than Bruce's - can I team up with you, big boy" I don't know how they could have made the homoerotic aspects more obvious.

I find it humourous how people think if you enjoy playing a game like Gears, or the Top Gun volleyball scene it makes you a closet homosexual...cos to be honest i see it as a blatant bit of childish homophobia...

I enjoyed Gears and i love Top Gun, but i'm also pretty sure that last friday i stuck my dick into my girlfriend...it seems that the people who redicule the game or movie just have this thing against anything macho with fear of it turning them gay..."oh i better not play this...i might get attracted to muscles." "I can't watch this film anymore cos i might contract 'the gay' ewwwwwwwww"

Its the 21st century...grow the fuck up...

And seriously...how many people our age didnt idolise Stallone in Rambo? Or Arnie in Predator and Terminator as kids? Gears is a throw back to the 80's action sensibilities that if you ask me, the AvP films could do something to learn from...

Beery:
I don't know how they could have made the homoerotic aspects more obvious.

Why don't you fire up that imagination of yours, I'm pretty sure you can do it as you purport to be the ultimate arbiter of high homo-eroticism. I bet you're already picturing the main characters smearing motor oil all over each other. You think that excites other men don't you, other men would be real excited by that. Imagine all those other men touching themselves at the thought of two improbable video game characters smearing absurd substances all over each other.

I think the reviewers who slammed Gears in the way they did probably also thought that the movie Starship Troopers was a serious attempt to win everyone over to the awesome concept of fascist, ultra-conservative, militaristic cultures, and the importance of propaganda and snazzy black uniforms.

Where the reality is that the makers of Gears of War, and so too the writers of Starship Troopers, managed to use an essentially satirical situation as the backdrop and the raison d'Ítre for big armor, big guns, and stupid ideals. Yes it is a fantasy, but not all fantasies are sexual as you and your friend Freud most incorrectly assume.

Seriously, what's next, 'My Little Pony' being a metaphor for heavy petting?

Facepalm, I bet the author really liked the game but was to scared to make his own opinion because his friends and indeed the rest of the gaming community would laugh at him because he likes a homoerotic game, which GoW isn't. Well I liked GoW, and there is nothing homosexual about the game and if people think there is some gayness to it I'd say its because *that* person is insecure and can't look at a buff guy with a chainsaw without getting a erection which is a very interesting fetish. I agree with TeamWang

So because it's muscular it must be gay? A big part of the story of dow2 is about rescueing the wife of one of the characters...

Wow, it's Kieron!

Wow, people. Get shorter horses to ride.

I like Gears for the same reason I like to watch Predator, or Commando. Did they take themselves seriously? They tried to, at least, but I think it was two-sided; it's over-the-top. It has an excuse to be unintentionally humorous. I think the intent is secondary to the actual product.

Not sure how Gears is a 'closet homosexual' game, to be honest. Yes, you can certainly make that joke based on the sillyness of the character interactions and designs, but it doesn't translate to the psychology of the person actually playing the game. I certainly don't take the games seriously, but I do enjoy a bit of mindless fun, which Gears provides. The same reason I can watch an Arnold film and genuinely enjoy it.

Get over yourselves.

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