Zero Punctuation: The E3 Trailer Park

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I thought you were kind of wrong with this one. There were actually a lot of interesting titles this year. Perhaps you missed them because EA was involved with the majority of them, and the recognition of creativity in EA may cause the apocalypse.

yeah, E3 seemed full of suck. i actually bothered to watch part of the sony presentation and after about 10 minutes i had had enough. what's the point of all that presentation value if you're not actually going to show anything? or the few things you do actually show are brief, meaningless, boring, janky, or some combination thereof...? i'd have gotten more out of a slide presentation with one-sheets projected onto a moldy wall in my garage.

RE5 looks pretty sweet though. i'm a sucker for some good co-op, and i played re4 until my thumbs fell off.

I remain a skeptic not a pessimist. I do not go into a movie book, game etc. expecting it to be terrible. I expect it to be average and to just barely deliver on the promises on the back of the box. That is unless it sounds like a marketing thing you know things like 'incredible physics'. To my skeptic self 'incredible' 'breath-taking' and 'amazing' always translate to 'slightly above average' or 'good enough to be noticeable, not spectacular'

what about fable 2, and Spore Spore is new and innovative, sure its the sims meets a cvililization Diablo hybrid. but if you want to look at it that way any and all warcraft games are crappy and un original because they rip off LOTR to the enth degree

Yahztee you should be ashamed! I've stuck by your every word and action up unto this point. I am SO ANGRY AT YOU! That was not a Magpie! How can you even broadcast that you live in aus if you don't even know what our native animals look like you twat! that was more of a Willy Wagtail than a Magpie. Perhaps you should leave the shit hole city called Sydney and spend a day in the country. Which is what every other british person does here.

ANTI-SANTA:
Yahztee you should be ashamed! I've stuck by your every word and action up unto this point. I am SO ANGRY AT YOU! That was not a Magpie! How can you even broadcast that you live in aus if you don't even know what our native animals look like you twat! that was more of a Willy Wagtail than a Magpie. Perhaps you should leave the shit hole city called Sydney and spend a day in the country. Which is what every other british person does here.

No we dont. We just sit inside and watch porn and cartoons all day.

Oh and my heart has been broken by the forth Prince of Persia game. I've known about it for some months now but it just feels like a betrayal to the plot and my PS2.

Very amusing. I'm starting to miss the individual song intros, the new music sounds a bit....fratboyish.

Wow, pretty contradictory, Yahtzee. "Oh no, there are no new games, they're all sequels, unoriginal crap!" "Waah, the new Prince of Persia is different from the last one, oh noes!"

Cycloneman:
Wow, pretty contradictory, Yahtzee. "Oh no, there are no new games, they're all sequels, unoriginal crap!" "Waah, the new Prince of Persia is different from the last one, oh noes!"

Clap clap, OI. "The new Prince of Persia rips off Final Fantasy 10-12."

I really really want Mirror's Edge to be good too.

I cannot wait for Prince of Persia: Ghost of the Past (if thats still what it will be called) to come out because I want Yahtzee to tear it a new one after it totally betrayed the well rounded plot and the TRILOGY!

A wonderful look into E3 that made me very happy I missed it.

Thank You Mr. Croshaw.

Mag

How can you be a cynic about games that are sequels to games you love?. Isn't a sequel just more of the same but slightly improved?. I mean gears of war 2 and resident evil 5 is basicly just that.

Iori Branford:
Clap clap, OI. "The new Prince of Persia rips off Final Fantasy 10-12."

I figured it went without saying that it looks nothing like a Final Fantasy game, since you would have to have never seen a Final Fantasy game before for the idea to even cross your mind. "There is a fantastic setting and the main character covers his face? FF Clone!" Come on. Ignoring that it's not a role playing game, that it has a fuckton of platforming elements, there are a lot of elements that define Final Fantasy thematically beyond "fantasy setting," like pretty-boy heroes, and he even specifically shows that he knows what the FF games are like.

Is Lord of the Rings "anime" too? Ridiculous setting, evil empire, monsters that crawl and leap, et cetera.

Grifmik:
How can you be a cynic about games that are sequels to games you love?. Isn't a sequel just more of the same but slightly improved?. I mean gears of war 2 and resident evil 5 is basicly just that.

Oh Grifmik, you have much to learn. Look up Fallout: Brotherhood of steel, and then tell me sequels are just the original game made better

Grifmik:
Isn't a sequel just more of the same but slightly improved?

I thought sequel meant more of the same, only worse. Oh...wait...we're talking about games. Sorry, got confused for a moment. I was thinking movies.

Wait, I thought that E3 died last year, before being revived by FULL CASH INJECTION

PLEASE FIX THE MUSIC GODDAMNIT!

I very much enjoy ZP, have done for months, but one of the things that I really liked about it was the opening and closing music. It was witty, refreshing and very British.

Cheese metal and swizzy animations on the front and back of the show, on the other hand, are so offensively bad that they're putting me off watching ZP at all. Bad bad bad bad editorial decision Americanising something which is very un-American and generally making it look like every other crap review site out there.

please
please
please
PLEASE

Do something about this.

tadhgk:
PLEASE FIX THE MUSIC GODDAMNIT!

I very much enjoy ZP, have done for months, but one of the things that I really liked about it was the opening and closing music. It was witty, refreshing and very British.

Cheese metal and swizzy animations on the front and back of the show, on the other hand, are so offensively bad that they're putting me off watching ZP at all. Bad bad bad bad editorial decision Americanising something which is very un-American and generally making it look like every other crap review site out there.

please
please
please
PLEASE

Do something about this.

I'm sorry, do you watch these videos because of the reviews or because of the music? Stop whinning about this little change that doesn't even affect the overall quality of these reviews so... suck it up. If you want you can always skip the intro, but Yahtzee wanted it to be like this and like this it shall... be.
Moving along, great video this week, but then again do I really have to say this anymore?

Cycloneman:

Iori Branford:
Clap clap, OI. "The new Prince of Persia rips off Final Fantasy 10-12."

I figured it went without saying that it looks nothing like a Final Fantasy game, since you would have to have never seen a Final Fantasy game before for the idea to even cross your mind. "There is a fantastic setting and the main character covers his face? FF Clone!" Come on. Ignoring that it's not a role playing game, that it has a fuckton of platforming elements, there are a lot of elements that define Final Fantasy thematically beyond "fantasy setting," like pretty-boy heroes, and he even specifically shows that he knows what the FF games are like.

Is Lord of the Rings "anime" too? Ridiculous setting, evil empire, monsters that crawl and leap, et cetera.

But the Lord of the Rings doesn't have an ambigously gay, androgynous pretty boy male that is full of angst against the world or against a particular person, although he does try to act all cool like every time. Oh, and impossible hair styles, gigantic swords and ridiculous outfit. Forgot about those.

Now LotR does have an ambigously gay duo, but it isn't enough to reach to FF point. In the run to enter the "JRPG style", PoP comes closer to the finishing line. Because in all fact, when he means Final Fantasy he pretty much means almost every JRPG out there, since they tend to have characters like that.

And do mind that I am quite curious about the new Prince of Persia and disagree with Yahtzee when it comes to pissing on the previous saga when the Sands of Times saga is just a part of the PoP universe. But that doesn't mean I didn't laugh with him when he said that.

Caboose669:

crisissuit3:
i agreed with everything you said. not because im some insane yahtzee fanboy.

I've heard denial is the first sign. If you need help about your yahtzee addiction, please call 08000 LV2HLP, calls charged at 20 per minute

... obviously you think the human race is full of fanboy idiots with no brains. like i said, i agree because what he said is true and i happen to like the same things that he likes.

Cycloneman:
Wow, pretty contradictory, Yahtzee. "Oh no, there are no new games, they're all sequels, unoriginal crap!" "Waah, the new Prince of Persia is different from the last one, oh noes!"

Maybe it's because he enjoyed the previous Prince of Persia games but didn't enjoy the other stuff which is having sequels. Apparently every comment has to be a blanket term with no exceptions, or else it's hypocritical. Presumably he wouldn't have minded the sequels so much if there had been anything else.

Now call me a Yahtzee fanboy.

Am I the only one who thinks mirrors edge looks bad? Honestly, am I?

Geo Da Sponge:

Cycloneman:
Wow, pretty contradictory, Yahtzee. "Oh no, there are no new games, they're all sequels, unoriginal crap!" "Waah, the new Prince of Persia is different from the last one, oh noes!"

Maybe it's because he enjoyed the previous Prince of Persia games but didn't enjoy the other stuff which is having sequels. Apparently every comment has to be a blanket term with no exceptions, or else it's hypocritical. Presumably he wouldn't have minded the sequels so much if there had been anything else.

Mirror's Edge, Dead Space, Alpha Protocol, Dark Void, Infamous, Left 4 Dead, Spore, et cetera.

Halfang:
Wait, I thought that E3 died last year, before being revived by FULL CASH INJECTION

Wait, when did E3 get AIDS?

And Yahtzee, your E3 vid disappoints me. Fine by me if you like to be pessimistic towards everything, but don't encourage people to be pessimists.

Well, about the pessimism I agree... If you don't have much faith in a game you wont be disappointed. I really liked the Prince of Persia Trilogy, with Warrior Within being my favorite (I started liking Godsmack when I played it :P), but I wouldn't call it the best series of the last gen. As for that "groping for the rewind button every time my toast lands butter side down" thingy, It happened to me A LOT when I used to play POP! Nice review, miss the intro/outro music though :/

Finally someoneagrees with me about the Watchmen trailer!

It's a bit hard to review on what little happened at E3 since some of the developers did't want to show up and show off some video on their latest creation.

At least there was a video on E3 and not some shit game who Yahtzee would have gave us another reason to hate it (no examples to backup). Then again he could have caved into demands and finally sunk himself into Mario Kart Wii (i'm sure most people have given up by now) or some game that was released so long ago that most have moved on from.

This week's video was predictable in my and a few friends I know that watch ZP, coming off E3 and all.

Geo Da Sponge:
[quote=Cycloneman]Wow, pretty contradictory, Yahtzee. "Oh no, there are no new games, they're all sequels, unoriginal crap!" "Waah, the new Prince of Persia is different from the last one, oh noes!"

On contradiction, yes, he does seem to have a habit of slamming games on desgin issues, then slamming other games on design issues that are polar opposites to the original issue.
(I.E. "Bioshock pauses the game when you go into the inventory screen, how un-realistic" and then, "Alone in The Dark *doesn't* pause when you go into the inventory screen, how annoying!")

It'd be fine if he had consistency in what he wanted, beyond that of "every game isn't up to scratch", because that just gets boring.. While i'm on the topic, Yahtzee complained that MGS4 had no stealth.. So, having only flirted with the first game, i decided to ask a good friend of mine called Chris who's been a fan of MGS for sometime, what he thought.
His answer was clear.. he told me that he'd recently completed the entire first third of the game (excluding scripted moments and boss fights) without being spotted once. It just takes some planning. My opinion is that he just found it hard.

Zulu-Echo14:

I'm sorry, do you watch these videos because of the reviews or because of the music? Stop whinning about this little change that doesn't even affect the overall quality of these reviews so... suck it up. If you want you can always skip the intro, but Yahtzee wanted it to be like this and like this it shall... be.

It DOES affect the overall quality of the reviews.

And I have no idea if that's what Yahtzee wanted it like or not, or whether he was handed a copyright slap from a lawyer for using other peoples' music, or whether he just found the hassle of finding those bits of music a bit too much every week. And neither do you.

But given that the man has demonstrated an acute intelligence on many more than one occasion as a reviewer, one assumes that he wouldn't have made a brain-dead decision to cloak each review in the same sort of bullshit music that you see in Game Trailers, Gamesport reviews and the like. No, this smacks of an editorial decision to make things seem more marketable and it's rubbish.

And you all know it.

Souplex:
Am I the only one who thinks mirrors edge looks bad? Honestly, am I?

Very yes. The rest of the billions of people world wide are already making a que. I know I'm looking forward to it. Shows FPS's don't have to bloody or fully violent, and rather just stylized and fun.

tadhgk:
And I have no idea if that's what Yahtzee wanted it like or not, or whether he was handed a copyright slap from a lawyer for using other peoples' music, or whether he just found the hassle of finding those bits of music a bit too much every week. And neither do you.

He wanted it that way. And you know how much he loves his fans right? I don't think it will ever change. Plus I already like this one.

PurpleRain:

Souplex:
Am I the only one who thinks mirrors edge looks bad? Honestly, am I?

Very yes. The rest of the billions of people world wide are already making a que. I know I'm looking forward to it. Shows FPS's don't have to bloody or fully violent, and rather just stylized and fun.

I'm not so crazy about it, something in the previews just yells "meh" at me, they should have made it about a dinosaur.

Seriously, it would fit the mechanics better.

You sure are right about the pessimistic thing " if it's good, that's great and if it's not then u won't have your heart broken" finally sum1 who thinks like me

I watched the new PoP trailer again and could only think about Yahtzee's description of the music XD It's just Ubisoft being artsy, leave them alone! :p Assassin's Creed's trailer was worse, where the artsyness fell on its face.

Well the clapping certainly woke me up! (I was watching this at 2am XD)

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