Zero Punctuation: Prince of Persia Retrospective

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no wait wait wait

i got it

Portal,
Silent Hill 2,
Prince of Persia: Sands of Time,
Spider-Man 2 and Fantasy World Dizzy

as your top 5 8D isnt that right?

I swear to god, if he doesnt reveiw the new prince.. On another note, perfect reveiw as always. Why is it that he likes all my faveorite games?

Yahtzee, you are my hero. Finally someone stands up for the right kinds of games, like Psychonauts and No More Heroes. BTW, i tried putting Branston Pickles on Killer 7 and No More Heroes, and the universe didn't end. Sad day.

quite funnt indeed

"Finally someone stands up for the right kinds of games, like Psychonauts and No More Heroes."

Giving poor easy mode bs reviews about good games doesnt help Psychonauts or any other game in any way.

1:portal
2:silent hill 2
3:pop sands of time
4:spiderman 2
5:fantasy world dizzy

now... about that utter disgust

Okay... here is what I thought and I think it is something that most people in this thread should finally understand:

THE REASON why his top-5 list was disguised is because it is HIS list. Everybody has their own favorites and so does Ben Croshaw, 'internet celebrity'. It's clearly a subjective choice of his and this is why NO ONE HERE should even bother to discuss and complain about it!

THE REASON why the list was not fully hidden but just scrambled (or whatever you call that in English) is to dare the fanboys to be PATHETIC and do that exactly to proove how fanboy-ish they are.

oh come on, it's gotta be...

1)Portal
2)Silent Hill II
3)PoP: Sands of Time
4)Spider-Man II
5)Banjo Kazooie

I can't read this thread anymore... I got to page 4 and just... I understand the earning disgust that would accompany naming the games.

For the record, I have no qualms with large breasted scantily clad women. I don't think that their breast size or outfit choice should be a factor in determining their role or quality as characters in games (both game designers and game fans need to realize this)

i would have to disagree with mark i think that the supercilious large breasted action girl is just the lazy programmer's means of keeping A.D.D. inflicted 40 year olds who live in their mother's basements looking at the screen. It's just so overused and one dimensional... if game designers want praise for making overrated and overused character types then they should at least make them interesting or, God forbid, ORIGINAL.

Another great review, as always.

Here Here. While Yahtzee has at times disagreed with my tastes, he gets it spot on here.

Quick! Everyone run out and buy Spiderman 2 so you can feel cool too! Only the cool kids are doing it... lol

"i would have to disagree with mark i think that the supercilious large breasted action girl is just the lazy programmer's means of keeping A.D.D. inflicted 40 year olds who live in their mother's basements looking at the screen. It's just so overused and one dimensional... if game designers want praise for making overrated and overused character types then they should at least make them interesting or, God forbid, ORIGINAL."

Right, female protaganists should be flat chested lazy fat asses with bad teath. That'll keep the "high brow" gamers coming back. Then we can make all the male protaganists scrawny limp wristed art fags who wear glasses and carry laptops anywhere they go with there hands free head sets. That will make for good char design.

Big boobs somehow equals shallow women?? Get your minds out of the gutter

And Spiderman 2 was a pretty good game. I dont think it would be in my top 5 or anything but I can see how Potzhee would seeing as how he likes to sit and play all by himself in the dark. Decent single player game.

Zeddicus Zhul Zorander:

Isan:

Zeddicus Zhul Zorander:

it's spelled A-S-S

or in english its "arse", like he said.

No, that's just how it's pronounced in Great Britain. Trust me, it's ass.

Also how it's pronounced in Australia...

It seems you need to remember a few things.
1) Yahtzee is British born
2) He currently resides in australia
3) There are other countries other than the USA (Shocking, I know)
4) The British invented the queens English - AKA proper English - we're right

1. Portal
2. Silent Hill 2
3. PoP Sands Of Time
4. Spiderman 1
5. Fantasy World Dizzy

NICE!

I couldn't stand the first game. I had no idea what was going on or what to do most of the time, the combat was tedious, and I couldn't hear any of the voices despite my best efforts to fiddle with the options.

I wonder how many people have tried to guess Yahtzee's top 5? If anyone DIDN'T guess portal then they are beyond stupid.

bodiddly83, I think you should lighten up a bit.

Most people here don't take Yahtzee's opinion of games to heart, we watch him because we think hes funny. He's a comedian.

If you don't find him funny then you shouldn't be here in the comments, making angry-sounding posts to people that couldn't care less what you think. If you don't like him, then just stop watching his videos and shut up about it.

Do I look like someone who "lightens up"?

"If you don't find him funny then you shouldn't be here in the comments, making angry-sounding posts to people that couldn't care less what you think. If you don't like him, then just stop watching his videos and shut up about it."

Oh, Im sorry. I didnt realise that this was just some big circle jerk for our dreamy-eyed Supernerd. My fault, commense with your ball shining.

"Oh Yahtzhee, can I have your babiez?"
"GOOD JOB YAHTZEE!! THANK YOU THANK YOU FOR DOING YOUR JOB!!"(no matter how half assed he odes it)

Not at all...

Its not something you should be proud of.

spungemonkey:
4) The British invented the queens English - AKA proper English - we're right

Sorry to break your bubble, but American English isn't "wrong English" any more than Catalán is "wrong Spanish". They're different dialects, nothing more.

bodiddly83:
"Finally someone stands up for the right kinds of games, like Psychonauts and No More Heroes."

Giving poor easy mode bs reviews about good games doesnt help Psychonauts or any other game in any way.

your forgeting that reviews as a whole are pointless.

bodiddly83:
"i would have to disagree with mark i think that the supercilious large breasted action girl is just the lazy programmer's means of keeping A.D.D. inflicted 40 year olds who live in their mother's basements looking at the screen. It's just so overused and one dimensional... if game designers want praise for making overrated and overused character types then they should at least make them interesting or, God forbid, ORIGINAL."

Right, female protaganists should be flat chested lazy fat asses with bad teath. That'll keep the "high brow" gamers coming back. Then we can make all the male protaganists scrawny limp wristed art fags who wear glasses and carry laptops anywhere they go with there hands free head sets. That will make for good char design.

Big boobs somehow equals shallow women?? Get your minds out of the gutter

I was with you until you started bashing gays. Your point was so well thought yet not well writen, a shame.

ANYwho, I agree. Although over used I enjoy pretty people. I like what is appealing to the eyes. Now it would be nice to tone it down enough so we were at a human point of beauty. I like that. Maybe put some cherryblossems floating around too.
It's like what he said in 'No More Heros' I think where they wanted to have social satire and make a point so much that they were ruining the game for it. [Elegedly]
If I saw a game called 'Beautiful people in light petty scenery with basic story line and huge world to just explore and do side quests with no main story line to kill your soul' I buy that shit, play it until I die and take it with me to my coffin. Requesting that they put the consol in with me.
On second thought that's why I've been playing Okami 18 hours a day non-stop for a week until I finished it. It was pretty with flowers everywhere, had beautiful animals [that you could talk to.] The best main character animal in the history of anything, and a huge wourld of side quests. *Drools*

Only on the Escapist can nerds argue over the English language, a man none of them have met and his top 5 games and the ratio of tits to brains in supercilious bad ass action girls.

DavidTanis:
Only on the Escapist can nerds argue over the English language, a man none of them have met and his top 5 games and the ratio of tits to brains in supercilious bad ass action girls.

Fail an audition?

"I was with you until you started bashing gays. Your point was so well thought yet not well writen, a shame."

I wasnt taking a stab at gays fat people or poor hygiene as much as making a point about what people expect out of character designs and how dumb it is to correlate "the ratio of tits to brains in supercilious bad ass action girls".

And a shame? why, is this some kind of fucking contest? Is this a fucking english composition forum or something? a SHAME? A shame is being a well spoken, educated person and then making pants on head retarded game reviews on easy mode and then talking shit about the fact you dont even play half the games you "review"

"Not at all...

Its not something you should be proud of."

Dont think I forgot you, mfer. I could give two tugs of a dead dogs cock about what you think someone should be proud of. I didnt sign up to sit around and verbally lick someones asshole while ignoring how abunduntly retarded half the things he says are, ez mode mfer.

I enjoyed watching this review a lot, it's been a few years since I played a PoP game and as a big fan of the series this review made me want to go back and play through them all again. So I did.

I have to say I'm actually very surprised Yahtzee holds the first game in such a higher regard than the second. I personally think that the Warrior Within made massive steps forward and blew Sands of Time out of the water, which in itself is very impressive because Sands of Time is an awesome game. Here are my reasons why I think Warrior Within is superior:

1. Massively improved combat. Thought I'd get the obvious one out of the way first, we all know this is the best change.
2a. The game has attitude. The Prince in Sands of Time was somewhat of a whining, sarcastic know-it-all. His light-hearted approach was humorous at times but to me it didn't really fit the bill of a sword-wielding hero slashing sand zombies to death. In Warrior Within, the Prince is darker, moodier and more aggressive. Conversation is short and to the point. I agree there are no relationships of note that have had much thought put in to them - but does there need to be?
2b. Part of the reason the game has attitude - the score is superb. The heavy guitar music suits the game perfectly and fight scenes kick ass because of it. Does anybody else feel genuinely exhilerated when running from the Dahaka? It's one of the most exciting moments in any game I've played running away from the giant beast, knowing you have to time every jump and run to pefection else he'll catch you. I love those chases. Plus the Godsmack music works beautifully in tandem.
3. The Dahaka represents a genuine bad-guy! Let's face it, that Vizier bloke (who was a blatant rip-off of Jafar from Aladdin by the way) was hardly a worth adversary was he? He appears, what, twice in the entire game? And we're supposed to feel like the final fight with him means anything? Going mano-a-mano with the Dahakta on that massive platform suspended in mid-air was great!
4. Much better puzzles. The game is still entirely linear but there are moments when it's not entirely clear where to go. The first time I played the game I got lost in the first clock tower. It's frustrating but it's fun too, Sands of Time felt like my hand was being held the entire time to make sure I didn't take a wrong turn.
5. More boss fights! And sort of mini boss fights too. Because everyone loves a good boss fight.

So in summary, I agree with Yahtzee's points about characterisation to an extent, though I think the new tone actually suits the game slightly better, and I don't think you can let this detract from the absolutely superb gameplay.

You don't have to love him bodiddly, but if you're going to critise then at least do it without making yourself look like a complete tosser in the process. If you can't do it constructively then nobody is interested in what you have to say. You're so ANGRY. Get a hobby or something, its pathetic.

If you don't like him then you are allowed to say so and critisise, as you have been doing. We're NOT Yahtzee butt kissers (at least i'm not), but MOST people manage to critisise without shouting and swearing every sentence. It just makes YOU look bad, and because you don't even try to be civilised, nobody is going to care what you have to say or take your opinion into account.

Just because you think the things he says are retarded doesn't mean everyone does - Its OPINION, so everyone has a different OPINION on Yahtzees videos. Just because we enjoy his videos doesn't mean we want to have his babies. People might think differently from you, thats life. You don't have to be so damn angry.

Exactly.

Also I find it funny how he tells me what I said was wrong and didn't even respond to the fact that I was agreeing with him.

With the videos he's saying his opinion and his review. It's a professional opinion. A trainer at a gym might say I'm out of shape and should listen to his crap about weight lifting. I trust his professional opinion, but I believe I'm not out of shape enough to pay $50 for a weight set.

Your suppose to just take his thoughts into account when looking at the game. If you don't believe it then that's fine. Don't watch it if you feel so strongly against it.

The truth is most people watch it for fun not because they actually care what stance he takes. Like when I watch cheat, not because I have that game and need tips, but because it's entertaining.

it go's

1. portal
2.silent hill 2
3.prince of Persia:sands of Time
4.spider man 2
5.fantasy world dizzy
(like it matters)

Well I'm pissed he hyped it up so much, I bought two swords for the wii and the graphics are so bad its unplayable. It's comparable to turok on the 64.

memejoey:
You don't have to love him bodiddly, but if you're going to critise then at least do it without making yourself look like a complete tosser in the process. If you can't do it constructively then nobody is interested in what you have to say. You're so ANGRY. Get a hobby or something, its pathetic.

If you don't like him then you are allowed to say so and critisise, as you have been doing. We're NOT Yahtzee butt kissers (at least i'm not), but MOST people manage to critisise without shouting and swearing every sentence. It just makes YOU look bad, and because you don't even try to be civilised, nobody is going to care what you have to say or take your opinion into account.

Just because you think the things he says are retarded doesn't mean everyone does - Its OPINION, so everyone has a different OPINION on Yahtzees videos. Just because we enjoy his videos doesn't mean we want to have his babies. People might think differently from you, thats life. You don't have to be so damn angry.

Oh wow. Lets make this about me being a potty mouth and leave the easy mode "exagerating"(see lieing) mother fucker out of it for a sec I dont know what the fuck tosser means but I guess it must be something like super-wicked-bad cause thats all me sweetmouth. I have a hobby, its melting non skilled bitch faces. Im not just angry, Im pissed the fuck off.

Im pissed the fuck off that some easy mode playing cock knocker has the fucking balls to act like he has any fucking idea about what constitutes good fucking game mechanics all the while playing the shit on easy mode or doing the absolute most stupid things he can in the games and then act like, because he is doing the absolute dumbest fucking thing he can, it somehow makes a game mechanic broken. Im pissed off that this asshat has somehow duped an otherwise ok gaming site(edit: I take it back after seeing the bit on Death and failure in games) to give him money to spew his bullshit over the fucking internet. Im pissed off that the lamest of the lame are LITERALLY asking to have his fucking babiez(I was fucking quoting mfer) displaying exactly how stupid these mother fuckers are. Im pissed the fuck off that the mother fucker can say with a straight face how great Fantasy World Dizzy is and mother fuckers dont have the balls to fucking call his bullshit.

Constructive? Im looking to burn to this tower of bullshit to the mother fucking ground.(can you smell that shit?)

As for this "but MOST people manage to critisise without shouting and swearing every sentence. It just makes YOU look bad, and because you don't even try to be civilised, nobody is going to care what you have to say or take your opinion into account." YOU dont speak for EVERYBODY. Lets just check that shit at the fucking door. And talking shit about swearing? What the fuck? Im an A-M-E-R-I-C-A-N. I dont think its funny to make oh by the way youre a shithole jokes like The British(or australianaksndkns)and then act like its some kind of high brow bullshit. I think its funny to stick my balls on people and yell OWNED over and over again. I cuss and swear a LOT. Its part of my fucking language. Civilised? that shit goes out the door when mother fuckers talk some scrub shit while playing on easy mode, not even bothering to play the games reviewed, and in general being King Noob of Sucksville and pretending youre King Cock of Bigcocksville while people sit and suck on your balls because they suck almost as bad if not worse.

UnconditionalZeldaLove:
Exactly.

Also I find it funny how he tells me what I said was wrong and didn't even respond to the fact that I was agreeing with him.

With the videos he's saying his opinion and his review. It's a professional opinion. A trainer at a gym might say I'm out of shape and should listen to his crap about weight lifting. I trust his professional opinion, but I believe I'm not out of shape enough to pay $50 for a weight set.

Your suppose to just take his thoughts into account when looking at the game. If you don't believe it then that's fine. Don't watch it if you feel so strongly against it.

The truth is most people watch it for fun not because they actually care what stance he takes. Like when I watch cheat, not because I have that game and need tips, but because it's entertaining.

And when the fuck did I say you was wrong about anything other than what MY fucking point was.

This "opinion" needs to get checked also. Opinion doesnt count for shit when you play on easy and then act like the game sucks because it is omg omg omg EASY. Opinion means shit when you dont even play the games.

It is a FACT he plays on easy. It is a fact he doesnt even play half the shit he is reviewing. It is a fact he doesnt have a fucking factual leg to fucking stand on for his shitty little "opinion"

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