Christmas Wishes

Christmas Wishes

Andy Chalk has drawn up his gaming wish list for Santa and it includes decent DRM, European craziness, and horseflesh.

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My list:
(in no particular order)

1: A working 486, with the entire dosgame library.

2: Unlimited Free Petrol Card.

3: A trip to space, preferably with a gravity-generator, and panorama view over earth from a giant window in my bedroom.

4: F.E.A.R. 2 to come out already.

5: A years suply of Mountain Dew with Portal Flavour.

6: Me being able to find my old Sega Genesis again in my attic.

7: A time warp that will allow me to play all the game that game out this fall, without thinking about Uni.

8: Creative Assembly to announce Warhammer: Total War.

Canada's bloodless political turmoil has me hoping for stability at some point.

A job doing PR for any of several video game developers I highly respect, or video game publication.

Brilliant list Malygris. I agree with it totally. Except for the pony part, mine has to have wings.

An R18+ videogame rating for Australia. Okay, so I don't live in Australia and if I was being completely honest I'd admit that I don't particularly care what happens there. But the so-called rating system they're forced to put up with is an utter abortion that not only fails to serve the vast majority of Australian gamers but seems to employ a certain degree of randomness as well. F.E.A.R. 2 is banned but Grand Theft Auto IV is okay, but only on the PC? How the hell does that make any sense? I think it'd be great if you could work some of your St. Nick magic and give our brothers Down Under a bit of a break.

Aww, that's sweet. I suppose Santa could have a little talk with the 'Hon.' Michael Atkinson...

As for my Christmas list, it's all about a new computer. Maybe Far Cry 2 to christen the thing.

stompy:

An R18+ videogame rating for Australia. Okay, so I don't live in Australia and if I was being completely honest I'd admit that I don't particularly care what happens there. But the so-called rating system they're forced to put up with is an utter abortion that not only fails to serve the vast majority of Australian gamers but seems to employ a certain degree of randomness as well. F.E.A.R. 2 is banned but Grand Theft Auto IV is okay, but only on the PC? How the hell does that make any sense? I think it'd be great if you could work some of your St. Nick magic and give our brothers Down Under a bit of a break.

Aww, that's sweet. I suppose Santa could have a little talk with the 'Hon.' Michael Atkinson...

As for my Christmas list, it's all about a new computer. Maybe Far Cry 2 to christen the thing.

I'd suggest you shoot to an actual good game like Crysis Warhead, but then he's just Santa, not Jesus Christ Almighty himself.

Indigo_Dingo:
I'd suggest you shoot to an actual good game like Crysis Warhead, but then he's just Santa, not Jesus Christ Almighty himself.

I've played the Crysis demo, and it's not really my thing. I have time, so I'll think about it. Actually, what's the problem with Far Cry 2? (not an attack, just curious)

An approval from Ubisoft to take me on on an internship.

stompy:

Indigo_Dingo:
I'd suggest you shoot to an actual good game like Crysis Warhead, but then he's just Santa, not Jesus Christ Almighty himself.

I've played the Crysis demo, and it's not really my thing. I have time, so I'll think about it. Actually, what's the problem with Far Cry 2? (not an attack, just curious)

Plot issues, no lasting effect on the environment, endless driving through areas that aren't that good to look at, cold and lifeless characters, tons of grinding, broken stealth.....

Don't get me wrong, its not actively a bad game, its just that right now, there are a ton of games on all consoles (and PC if you really want to be technical) that are so much better. If you really, like really must have a game thats a perfect depiction of the African Savannah, wait a year and get Afrika and Resident Evil 5.

as for my personal list....
1. The follow through and creativity to finish a level that I start making in LittleBigPlanet
2. Some solid info on Trico - come on, we all want this at this point.
3. Tickets to Iron Maidens 2009 World Tour.
4. Fat Princess to not be strung up and crisped by all news outlets worldwide, or maybe even for some to actually praise the game for defying the tiny anime girl stereotype.
5. A Girlfriend...hey, I'm lonely, as you can tell by 1-4.
6. Micheal Atkinsons head on a platter - whats the problem? You got a shortage of platters?
7. A decent game movie - please Santa, take God Of War away from Brett Ratner, and give it to someone who isn't gonna fuck it up.

Indigo_Dingo:
Post

Hmm... thanks for the information. I suppose I'll have to do with The Orange Box, I can't think of another decent shooter that fits my tastes.

It's a terrible consolized dumbed down game with 0 replay value, pointless, inane story and boring, mind numbing, repetitive game play is that enough? Not an attack, just stating the facts. It's nick name is Busted Up Jeep Simulator 2, Fix My Ride 2, possibly also goes by Attack of the Kamikaze Jeeps or Everyone in Africa Hates Me and I Don't Know Why. This is their idea of multiple endings, I'll post it with a spoiler warning in case anyone mistakenly picks it up and the ending is "spoiled". The ending for me was spoiled just by taking the time to complete this asinine brain fart.

****SPOILER ALERT*****
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1phAz4rYTNI

lol to start my Christmas list:

I wish I had never bought Far Cry 2

I will end my rant there and wait for my blood pressure to return to normal. It also helps to remember that the fire in Far Cry 2 is pretty amazing, it's only redeeming quality I might add, but not worth $50 for a fire simulator.

Indigo_Dingo:

7. A decent game movie - please Santa, take God Of War away from Brett Ratner, and give it to someone who isn't gonna fuck it up.

Granted!

Bioshock is being directed by Gore Verbinski (The Ring, Pirates Trilogy) say what you will about the scripts he works with, he is a solid as hell director with a great eye for action and mystery, perfect for Bioshock. The script is usually his problem, however the Bioshock script is being written by...

John Logan who has written the screenplays for such gems as The Last Samurai, Gladiator, The Aviator and Sweeny Todd.

This is as good a chance as videogame movies have to succeed as of this moment.

my wish list isnt that big.

1. flat screen computer monitor
2. Folklore
3. a chance to meet whoever made animal crossing and beat them sensless

PedroSteckecilo:

Indigo_Dingo:

7. A decent game movie - please Santa, take God Of War away from Brett Ratner, and give it to someone who isn't gonna fuck it up.

Granted!

Bioshock is being directed by Gore Verbinski (The Ring, Pirates Trilogy) say what you will about the scripts he works with, he is a solid as hell director with a great eye for action and mystery, perfect for Bioshock. The script is usually his problem, however the Bioshock script is being written by...

John Logan who has written the screenplays for such gems as The Last Samurai, Gladiator, The Aviator and Sweeny Todd.

This is as good a chance as videogame movies have to succeed as of this moment.

Almost makes it a shame the IP is nearly impossible to turn into a good movie as is. It would be like turning a Metroid game into a movie, with one main character that's far too distanced from any supporting characters to make for any good dialogue.

Fox1789:
my wish list isnt that big.

1. flat screen computer monitor
2. Folklore
3. a chance to meet whoever made animal crossing and beat them sensless

*stares long and hard at your avatar*

... I have no words...and I can't believe I never noticed that before.

Also what's wrong with Animal Crossing? Sure it's um... bland? repetative? I dunno but it's got charm in spades.

my list is pretty short:

1) A way to play football manager at work; without being caught.

Not having to see my family this holiday. I'm serious, Thanksgiving can be summed up in 4 words. Bored, bored, awkward, redneck. My aunt was yelling at my uncle about the turkey, my cousin was doing her bi-polar thing, her son just dropped out of highschool after he got his girlfriend pregnant...and then he brought her to dinner, and my other cousin has like an attraction to fire and sharp things. I nearly got hit with a FRICKIN' SHURIKEN, I shit you not. Can't say its worse than last year though, last year he was throwing fireworks at gasoline cans in the back yard. This season is half past magical and Santa should be shot.

Lvl 64 Klutz:

PedroSteckecilo:

Indigo_Dingo:

7. A decent game movie - please Santa, take God Of War away from Brett Ratner, and give it to someone who isn't gonna fuck it up.

Granted!

Bioshock is being directed by Gore Verbinski (The Ring, Pirates Trilogy) say what you will about the scripts he works with, he is a solid as hell director with a great eye for action and mystery, perfect for Bioshock. The script is usually his problem, however the Bioshock script is being written by...

John Logan who has written the screenplays for such gems as The Last Samurai, Gladiator, The Aviator and Sweeny Todd.

This is as good a chance as videogame movies have to succeed as of this moment.

Almost makes it a shame the IP is nearly impossible to turn into a good movie as is. It would be like turning a Metroid game into a movie, with one main character that's far too distanced from any supporting characters to make for any good dialogue.

Yes, the actual subject matter would require it - Jack is emotionally null, and the movie is, if you cut out the details of how it arrived there (which in a movie are not going to be the main focus), Mad Max under the sea. The problem is that there is no justification on the characters part for continuing, and not just finding a room and living in Rapture for the rest of his life rather than sticking his neck out for someone he's never met, aside from the fact that that would be incredibly boring for the player. God Of War is a relatively unique idea that could actually survive independent of the fact that its a game, but its in the hands of a man who will fuck it up.

My list to the all powerful and benevolent Santa are as follows:

1) I want the paperwork for my Saab S900 back so I can drive it again.

2) A real life and fully functional lightsaber, just for the hell of it.

3) Blizzard to release a public apology to Games Workshop for shamelessly basing both Starcraft and Warcraft off of their intellectual properties. They also make the distinction that the Zerg came after the Tyranids not the other way around.

4) Jack Thompson gets hit by a bus.

5) Olivia Wilde shows up at my house playfully wrapped in ribbon and a big red bow.

6) If that fire breathing unnatural "dethpony" that Malygris asked for has any siblings, I want one too. I want to name mine "Thunderhorse".

7) The Watchmen movie lives up to all that we're expecting and isn't a bastardized retelling of the source material. Also, Alan Moore doesn't have to change his stance on movies based on his work, but he has to say something approving of it. I'd even take a simple "That'll do, pig" as long as he says it to Zach Snyder's face.

8) Jack Thompson gets hit by a second bus.

9) 3D Realms releases a demo for Duke Nukem Forever sometime within the next year and apologizes for taking so damned long. Failing that, the entire development staff commits suppuku as punishment for dishonoring themselves and their families.

10) Get my money back from EA from when I bought Spore. I can't believe that I actually bought that damn game...

Skarvey:
Not having to see my family this holiday. I'm serious, Thanksgiving can be summed up in 4 words. Bored, bored, awkward, redneck. My aunt was yelling at my uncle about the turkey, my cousin was doing her bi-polar thing, her son just dropped out of highschool after he got his girlfriend pregnant...and then he brought her to dinner, and my other cousin has like an attraction to fire and sharp things. I nearly got hit with a FRICKIN' SHURIKEN, I shit you not. Can't say its worse than last year though, last year he was throwing fireworks at gasoline cans in the back yard. This season is half past magical and Santa should be shot.

Surely I can't be the only one who thinks this sounds like Most Interesting Family/Holiday Experience EVAR.

Indigo_Dingo:

Lvl 64 Klutz:
stuff about BioShock movie

Yes, the actual subject matter would require it - Jack is emotionally null, and the movie is, if you cut out the details of how it arrived there (which in a movie are not going to be the main focus), Mad Max under the sea. The problem is that there is no justification on the characters part for continuing, and not just finding a room and living in Rapture for the rest of his life rather than sticking his neck out for someone he's never met, aside from the fact that that would be incredibly boring for the player.

Would you kindly pay closer attention to the in-game dialog? (Or perhaps you need to finish the game first... I'm not certain if you've played all the way through yet.) You might see how 2K addressed that point if you do.

-- Steve

 

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