The Tale of M and S

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The Tale of M and S

Yahtzee relates a parable of the console market

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I do believe that's the best Conspiracy Theory I've ever read/ heard/ seen/ imagined. Good read.

Conspiracy theory, much?

I would have switched the two letters in the title but otherwise great read.

I realised quite late who Mr S and Mr M are, after the 9th paragraph in the story, then had to go back and read it again xD
Oh Yahtzee, why do you think console manufacturers have dumb marketing strategies, when actually they're just evil fcuks! :D

With any senseless catastrophe, it's human nature to use conspiracies to try to make the world make sense again. I guess PR and marketing disasters spark the same thing in Mr. Croshaw.

-Dragmire-:
I would have switched the two letters in the title but otherwise great read.

That would fit the story very well, but I don't like having that on my mind when reading about a man in a trenchcoat watching children on a playground.

Oh Yahtzee you magnificent fool. There is no conspiracy or higher purpose. This is not about profits or sales. Some men just want to watch the world burn ^_^

Never attribute to malice that which is adequately explained by stupidity. - Hanlon's Razor

Yes, I really do think the MS marketing department is that much out of touch with what their consumers want.

That was plain amazing. It's probably not the exact way it went, but it is a good metaphor for how corporations move these days.

Now that I've seen the way he writes fiction, I'm gonna have to buy Mogworld, goddamnit.

That's definitely the best writ conspiracy I've heard about the subject yet. I'd like to conjecture that something like this might have happened, but Microsoft executives would need intelligence to do so.

Gethsemani:
Never attribute to malice that which is adequately explained by stupidity. - Hanlon's Razor

Yes, I really do think the MS marketing department is that much out of touch with what their consumers want.

Never attribute competence to Microsoft when it can easily be put down to incompetence =D I could never believe that MS had the finesse to pull off any sort of sophisticated long-term planning

Gethsemani:
Never attribute to malice that which is adequately explained by stupidity. - Hanlon's Razor

Yes, I really do think the MS marketing department is that much out of touch with what their consumers want.

Pretty much this. Stupid as these companies are, they're not *that* stupid....

I get it!!

Mr. S is Shigeru Miyamoto and Mr. M is Peter Molyneux!

... wait, suddenly I don't get it.

Thought this was going to be about Mario and Sonic from the title. Then Marks and Spencers. MS and Sony didn't even cross my mind, until I read the article of course.

Enjoyable read.

LordTerminal:
Sorry Yahtzee but wasting your novelist experience dressing up yet another PC elitist load of BS like the last 3 times does not magically excuse for well making another PC elitist load of BS.

It's somewhat insightful to get this glimpse into how insane the contents of one's post can seem when they see everything as a stark realm of black and white: where if you're aren't actively fanwanking over consoles than you're some kind of PC elitist.

Gethsemani:
Never attribute to malice that which is adequately explained by stupidity. - Hanlon's Razor

You forgot the second half: Don't assume malice when stupidity is an adequate explanation. At least, not the first time. Ian Fleming further explained it as "Once is happenstance, twice is coincidence, three times is enemy action."

Shall I count off all the seemingly stupid/malicious things Microsoft has done or said this year?

...And then Mr. N walked by and crop dusted both of them as they sat there wondering why their sandwiches tasted like farts.

Orekoya:

LordTerminal:
Sorry Yahtzee but wasting your novelist experience dressing up yet another PC elitist load of BS like the last 3 times does not magically excuse for well making another PC elitist load of BS.

It's somewhat insightful to get this glimpse into how insane the contents of one's post can seem when they see everything as a stark realm of black and white: where if you're aren't actively fanwanking over consoles than you're some kind of PC elitist.

Except this is the fourth or fifth time he's wasted an article/video on this topic and it's always the same answer. This isn't seeing in black and white, this is just basically pointing out what's really wrong with this "story" and that Yahtzee needs to get off his soapbox.

I want to say this is a case of Hanlon's Razor, but reflecting on it I'm now uncertain.

LordTerminal:

Except this is the fourth or fifth time he's wasted an article/video on this topic and it's always the same answer. This isn't seeing in black and white, this is just basically pointing out what's really wrong with this "story" and that Yahtzee needs to get off his soapbox.

and what exactly is wrong? You forgot to mention it. All I see is Yahtzee's theory and people commenting. Questions of plausibility haven't been brought up because who's to say how plausible it is? I dunno know, your acting as if you know better. Mr Smarty Pants parading his fat ass, thinking he can show a superior opinion but forgetting to point out the holes.

DVS BSTrD:

-Dragmire-:
I would have switched the two letters in the title but otherwise great read.

That would fit the story very well, but I don't like having that on my mind when reading about a man in a trenchcoat watching children on a playground.

Touching his lips as well.

Both Mr M and Mr S should bring packets of sugar for occasions like this.

LordTerminal:

Orekoya:

LordTerminal:
Sorry Yahtzee but wasting your novelist experience dressing up yet another PC elitist load of BS like the last 3 times does not magically excuse for well making another PC elitist load of BS.

It's somewhat insightful to get this glimpse into how insane the contents of one's post can seem when they see everything as a stark realm of black and white: where if you're aren't actively fanwanking over consoles than you're some kind of PC elitist.

Except this is the fourth or fifth time he's wasted an article/video on this topic and it's always the same answer. This isn't seeing in black and white, this is just basically pointing out what's really wrong with this "story" and that Yahtzee needs to get off his soapbox.

Uh.. so, it's wrong for an article writer to point out when they think a gaming console does something wrong on a gaming news site? News to me! Honestly this just reeks of overreaction when Yahtzee releases three articles(video or otherwise) a week and E3 was three weeks ago. Even if what you say is true, that's saying half his posted content was his various reactions to stuff about E3. Hardly being on a soapbox.

You're right Yahtzee. ;D The story is better than what actually happened.

Well done.

Methinks Mr. Yahtzee is thinking too hard about the new consoles. Or should I say thinking too much? Find something new to ponder over, Mr. Yahtzee, or your audience might grow bored with you.
Ah, who am I kidding, you're almost the only interesting guy on the internet.

Never attribute to malice that which can be adequately explained by stupidity.

im gonna assume this is what actually happened with the PR department of M$. i mean they cant be that stupid!

any way a very nice article Mr.croshaw! bravo!

but i wanted MR.N to come in too!

LordTerminal:

Except this is the fourth or fifth time he's wasted an article/video on this topic and it's always the same answer. This isn't seeing in black and white, this is just basically pointing out what's really wrong with this "story" and that Yahtzee needs to get off his soapbox.

sorry but i dont see how he "wasted" an article/video on the subject. right now the biggest thing going on in the video game world is the next-gen consoles coming and his job as a video game critic is to comment on that and say how he thinks. and he thinks PC is better (which i agree with. go PC master race! :D) oh and saying Xbone and PS4 are shity does not actually mean that PC is good. they are two completely different things. shocking right? (but there is that one sentence saying new consoles are essentially PCs in a shiny box. but hey who says thats not true?)

Of course it's a false conspiracy but holy hell if I wouldn't read any book that Yahtzee wrote. I mean, wow, that cat can write.

A whole fuck-bunch of you need to reread the first part of this article.

This story is entirely fictional and was written by a mentally unbalanced man who doesn't believe that anything like this actually happened.

Like, geez.

But yeah, pretty cool little story. Me likey

LordTerminal:
Sorry Yahtzee but wasting your novelist experience dressing up yet another PC elitist load of BS like the last 3 times does not magically excuse for well making another PC elitist load of BS.

Did you miss the last 5 years, where he's been saying that he has been almost exclusively playing console games, and tends to prefer them? It's pretty much only been PC exclusives that he's played on PC.

The whole "PC Master Race" thing was in reference to The Witcher, and how the controls were overly complex, and how the devs used most of the buttons on the keyboard just because they could.

I get the impression that Yahtzee really wants a console that's good for the consumer, but he doesn't see one on the market, so he's begrudgingly accepting that PC is the way to go this time around.

Yahtzee, this is nice an all, but Mr. M hasn't backtracked at all.

Mr. M did revoke some bad points but he's lying about others.

Region Lock is gone. The once every 24 hour internet requirement is gone and so is the console locking.
However Mr. M is not as honest about the offline gaming.

I'll explain. They claimed you can play an offline game on an offline console.
However they did not explain what an offline game actually is.
I asked around, here's what I was told.

An offline game is a game without ANY features that require an internet connection.
Optional multiplayer and co-op? Online game.
Social media interaction? Online game.
Micro-transactions? Online game.
Posting highscores, achievements or other things online? Online game.
General "Cloud Interaction"? Online game.
Ability to put a save file on "the cloud"? Online game.

This means that there will hardly be any games that can be called offline games.
And all those online games? They require a CONSTANT internet connection.

So no. There will be no offline gaming since there will be no offline games.
They left the DRM up to the publishers and we know what publishers will do.
It's that plain and simple. We're still going to have a console with a constant internet requirement because all the games will have a constant internet requirement and Microsoft is all to happy to make that happen.

Orekoya:

Gethsemani:
Never attribute to malice that which is adequately explained by stupidity. - Hanlon's Razor

You forgot the second half: Don't assume malice when stupidity is an adequate explanation. At least, not the first time. Ian Fleming further explained it as "Once is happenstance, twice is coincidence, three times is enemy action."

Shall I count off all the seemingly stupid/malicious things Microsoft has done or said this year?

Ah yes, thanks - that makes me loath it somewhat less when people swinging that Razor around EVERY time a company does something anti-consumer for the billionth time; just another miss-use of a truism. Cheers :)

The saddest part is that even though I know this next generation only looks good because the Xbone looked so bad, I still have the desire to buy one of them. Mr. M and Mr. S are crafty ones indeed.

I thought with the title we would read S&M...

*Flushes out of the forums*

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