Yahtzee: +1 for sadness in truth, +1 for poking at WW2 games, rhyming would be a 3 or 4.
Jim: -1 for not being about gaming, -1 for being only slightly funny, rhyming probably a 2 or 3.
I live for your scoring system.
I don't like scoring system, so I will just speak out loud the pros and cons of each piece.
Pro: This is one of Yahtzee's better poems. No cheap laughs, no explaining the joke, no references. It feels original and solid. It has pitch black humour with a sense of class that totally deconstructs the entire shooter genre. The scenario depicted would not feel out of place even in a very great novel. It feels even better after each listen.
Con： I can't think of any legit flaws. I may able to come up with some if I think harder, but that's defeating the purpose of criticism. So I would instead give Yahtzee a bit of comment on his general work. Yahtzee only has 8 to 16 hours to play a game, it's usually enough to get you through one of the modern cookie cutting "cinematic experience" horse shit, but it is far insufficient to let any emotion grow. I would recommand you to split a big name story focused AAA title into a few sessions so that your judgement will be thorough. I dislike most modern games are trying to tell an emotional story while attampt to have their gapless murdering slip by, it makes all the characters harder to be sympathized. (Why would I care about Some bitch's life when I have killed at least 50 female bandits and necromancers in the last few hours) However, as a game journalist, you should understand that AAA titles are forced to be made this way. If you can ignore all the nameless people you have been murdered in a AAA title and only count dudes on your side, or people with names and faces, then you would have a better time taking the stories in.
BTW, you novels are not great. they have no dramas, no philosophy, no seriousness, no character building moment that changes my impression of some dudes/ladies. the frame is there, but the soul is not. Don't take this as ｍｙ ｇｒｕｄｇｅ ａｇａｉｎｓｔ ｙｏｕ， Ｉ ｌｏｖｅ ｙｏｕｒ ｈｕｍｏｕｒ， ｂｕｔ Ｉ ｄｏｎ＇ｔ ｌｉｋｅ ｔｈｅ ｌａｚｉｎｅｓｓ ｔｈａｔ ｆｌｏａｔｓ ｉｎ ｙｏｕｒ ｔｅｘｔｓ．
Pro: Using Froggie reference is quite funny, we only realise how awful those games are when we have been playing bigger and better games even since nintendo. Bits of it are quite frightening.
Con: I don't like any of the superman actors, superman doesn't have a soul; he has a dictionary for American in his chest instead of a heart. Jim did not expore the horridness to its full potential, and the wording is dry. (where are the bit of showing of your closet of skeletons and the plastificated hookers in your basement? how about killing his high school sweet-heart in front of him and skin his cat alive? Or even better, put him inside a James bond villainy torturing device that hacks off an inch of his foot every time he let a frog die.)
The biggest complain I have is: this poem gives no point. So, do you hate that guy secretly because most superheros suck, or do you like that punk so much that it defines and shapes you as a person? I don't get anything after finishing it, and I feel the build-up is in vain.
Also, using Fuck is only funny when it's deconstructed. I know it is frustrating to write a poem with Yahtzee every week, but you don't need to be better than anyone, just think up weird and interesting stuffs and then expand them and polish them. You will get something good out eventually.