The Ones Who Knock

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JaceArveduin:

Teoes:

I've known folks who purposely put 'Please give blood' stickers by their front doors to keep Jehovah's Witnesses at bay.

Really? My step-dad says that if you open the door while naked, they turn a most lovely shade of red and tell the other's to avoid that house. Personally, I'd just draw a pentagram on my door to keep them at bay.

Sounds like a reverse Devil Trap to me. Genius.

I actually have a pagan god shrine in my front yard. Keeps the solicitors away out of fear of black magic.

I'm not even mildly interested in Breaking Bad - but I still watched the last episode, to use as ammo against my friends in our daily spoiler-war.

iamjonah:
The end of Breaking Bad was good - but that alien invasion at the end was a bit out of left field.

That just to open it up for a Saints Row crossover later. They're going to bring out new DLC for the game and a new show that will correspond with each other story wise.

Turns out 'angel dust' was just meth all along.

canadamus_prime:
I've got to try that. I wonder if it works on other kinds of solicitors.

'invite them in! it always puts them off balance and frightens the crap out of them.'

Yeah, I'd agree. Breaking Bad spoilers. Screw that noise.

MinionJoe:

Farther than stars:

I'm sure it is. Does your friend really believe in Celtic Neopaganism?

Yup! Started a local group/grove, has a household shrine, and everything.

That's pretty cool actually. My ex-gf was a Hellenistic Neopagan but she never found anyone else close enough in her area to set up a group or meet anyone in person, it was always just talking online.

Huh. I just lock the gate in front of my house. That seems to keep most people out.

Although, I suppose this works too.

DeimosMasque:

iamjonah:
The end of Breaking Bad was good - but that alien invasion at the end was a bit out of left field.

My favorite part was Walt taking Jesse to the petting zoo and telling him, "You are really my son, that's why I'm so hard on you."

It was a nice moment right before the Aliens destroyed the meth lab. But it does make me think that Walt knew the aliens were coming.

I cried in that ending...what those aliens did to that poor dog...

As a non religious door to door saleswoman... that dog brings back horrid memories... man...evil yard dogs... in the south... in the country.... with no leash laws...

*cringes*

I don't get door to door evangelists where I live now, praise Bob, but we had a serious problem at my parent's house. 7th Day Adventists, Jehovah's Witnesses, LDS, you name it, we got them. I was the one who always ended up dealing with them, for some reason.

Claiming to be a Satanist just made them more eager, professing Catholicism scared off a few, but not enough. Eventually I found that placing a statue of Ganesh in a position prominently visible from the door did the trick. One look at it and they all made their excuses, and pretty soon we were free of the wretches, as they must have warned their friends.

Ha, I actually AM one of Jehovah's Witnesses, and I found this hilarious. Spoiling good media is all sorts of twisted and takes a particularly vile sort of mind... might have to burn that house down for the good of humanity. Not very Witness-like behavior, but we all have our shortcomings.

Now, to clear a few misconceptions:

Most of us have been at it long enough to place your dog into one of three categories: 1. Overgrown Puppy, 2. All Bark, or 3. Cujo. Some of us avoid dogs like the plague, most of us are equipped to handle types 1 and 2. No one screws with the type 3. Faith is a wonderful thing, but one ought not put God to the test. Your dog has a great many rights so long as he remains in your yard, if he comes into the street, I have the right to stove his head in. Remember that if you're the sort to loose a dog on a bloke for laughs.

Additionally, I've had some rather lovely conversations with NeoPagans of various traditions and Levayan Satanists. They're typically much more productive than talks with chest thumping Baptists who've never taken a moment to actually peruse the pages of the Bible they'll so ineptly defend, or the lazy atheist who's really an agnostic but can't be arsed to make a distinction between the two. We don't go knocking to judge, who am I to judge you? We go knocking to have a conversation. Anything in excess of this, anything less than this, is done in error. Unfortunately, errors do occur, for this I apologize. Folks are imperfect by nature, and even with a surprising amount of training, not all of us take to it naturally, though all of us are obligated to try. I've got a rather mild disposition, but obviously I'm not always the one who knocks.

If you don't want us stopping by to chat, there are two remarkably simple options open to you:

1.) invest all of a dollar in a "No Trespassing" sign. That sign carries a legal obligation (and if you live state side, it provides a homeowner a host of legal protections that you may be interested in.)

2.) Simply ask not to be called on. We've got a list, and we try to stick to it rather judiciously. Granted we may come around in a year or so to see if you still feel that way, but the last thing we want to do is be a nuisance.

Do Not:

Open the door naked - It'll just lead to many, many, many snide remarks and uncouth jokes at your expense later. Not to mention its a good way to end up on the sex offender registry

Hide - It's your bloody house, just shout something through the door, eh? Contrary to popular belief, you are not a ninja, your house creaks with every step you make, and the dog suddenly going quiet isn't fooling anybody. I have seen grown men cower behind a sofa (because apparently they'd forgotten the ill placement of the mirror on the mantle, and the fact that the front door is wide open.)

Pull a gun - So incredibly unnecessary and apt to cause legal trouble.

~~~

Jokes are jokes, jokes are lovely. But its amazing how much misinformation circulates about a group of people who go out of their way to talk to folks about themselves and their beliefs.

JaceArveduin:

Teoes:

I've known folks who purposely put 'Please give blood' stickers by their front doors to keep Jehovah's Witnesses at bay.

Really? My step-dad says that if you open the door while naked, they turn a most lovely shade of red and tell the other's to avoid that house. Personally, I'd just draw a pentagram on my door to keep them at bay.

Wouldn't a simple "any uninvited guests will be charged with trespassing" or better yet shot if your in an area that allows guns, sign do the job?

RicoADF:

JaceArveduin:

Teoes:

I've known folks who purposely put 'Please give blood' stickers by their front doors to keep Jehovah's Witnesses at bay.

Really? My step-dad says that if you open the door while naked, they turn a most lovely shade of red and tell the other's to avoid that house. Personally, I'd just draw a pentagram on my door to keep them at bay.

Wouldn't a simple "any uninvited guests will be charged with trespassing" or better yet shot if your in an area that allows guns, sign do the job?

Nope, not as funny, and likely not as efficient either. Seriously, which makes a better story? Telling people the reaction of a Johova's Witness to seeing you nude, or just them walking up, then walking away? (which likely won't happen anyway, they're quite persistent. Admittedly, I prefer the pentagram approach, since it doesn't require me to even go to the door.

I must offer, the finale to Breaking Bad was pretty good as far as finales go, but I have to say, the bit with the Zombies at the end through me way off.

JaceArveduin:

Nope, not as funny, and likely not as efficient either. Seriously, which makes a better story? Telling people the reaction of a Johova's Witness to seeing you nude, or just them walking up, then walking away? (which likely won't happen anyway, they're quite persistent.

I've never seen a Johova's witness, I don't know if it's because they don't exist around here or what but never had one drop by. I do know though that if you have said sign and they still walk onto your property and knock you can just call the cops to arrest them for trespassing which is what I'd do, I don't have time to waste with door to door salesman.

EnigmaticSevens:
Ha, I actually AM one of Jehovah's Witnesses, and I found this hilarious. Spoiling good media is all sorts of twisted and takes a particularly vile sort of mind... might have to burn that house down for the good of humanity. Not very Witness-like behavior, but we all have our shortcomings.

Now, to clear a few misconceptions:

Most of us have been at it long enough to place your dog into one of three categories: 1. Overgrown Puppy, 2. All Bark, or 3. Cujo. Some of us avoid dogs like the plague, most of us are equipped to handle types 1 and 2. No one screws with the type 3. Faith is a wonderful thing, but one ought not put God to the test. Your dog has a great many rights so long as he remains in your yard, if he comes into the street, I have the right to stove his head in. Remember that if you're the sort to loose a dog on a bloke for laughs.

Additionally, I've had some rather lovely conversations with NeoPagans of various traditions and Levayan Satanists. They're typically much more productive than talks with chest thumping Baptists who've never taken a moment to actually peruse the pages of the Bible they'll so ineptly defend, or the lazy atheist who's really an agnostic but can't be arsed to make a distinction between the two. We don't go knocking to judge, who am I to judge you? We go knocking to have a conversation. Anything in excess of this, anything less than this, is done in error. Unfortunately, errors do occur, for this I apologize. Folks are imperfect by nature, and even with a surprising amount of training, not all of us take to it naturally, though all of us are obligated to try. I've got a rather mild disposition, but obviously I'm not always the one who knocks.

If you don't want us stopping by to chat, there are two remarkably simple options open to you:

1.) invest all of a dollar in a "No Trespassing" sign. That sign carries a legal obligation (and if you live state side, it provides a homeowner a host of legal protections that you may be interested in.)

2.) Simply ask not to be called on. We've got a list, and we try to stick to it rather judiciously. Granted we may come around in a year or so to see if you still feel that way, but the last thing we want to do is be a nuisance.

Do Not:

Open the door naked - It'll just lead to many, many, many snide remarks and uncouth jokes at your expense later. Not to mention its a good way to end up on the sex offender registry

Hide - It's your bloody house, just shout something through the door, eh? Contrary to popular belief, you are not a ninja, your house creaks with every step you make, and the dog suddenly going quiet isn't fooling anybody. I have seen grown men cower behind a sofa (because apparently they'd forgotten the ill placement of the mirror on the mantle, and the fact that the front door is wide open.)

Pull a gun - So incredibly unnecessary and apt to cause legal trouble.

~~~

Jokes are jokes, jokes are lovely. But its amazing how much misinformation circulates about a group of people who go out of their way to talk to folks about themselves and their beliefs.

Thanks for taking the time to explain what it's like from the other side, over here in Australia we don't normally get such people and thus the jokes about not being able to get rid of them while funny never made much sense. Also thanks for pointing out what I already suggested regarding the do not disturb/trespass sign, it sounds like an obvious solution to me (I posted it myself before reading your post) :-)

RicoADF:

JaceArveduin:

Nope, not as funny, and likely not as efficient either. Seriously, which makes a better story? Telling people the reaction of a Johova's Witness to seeing you nude, or just them walking up, then walking away? (which likely won't happen anyway, they're quite persistent.

I've never seen a Johova's witness, I don't know if it's because they don't exist around here or what but never had one drop by. I do know though that if you have said sign and they still walk onto your property and knock you can just call the cops to arrest them for trespassing which is what I'd do, I don't have time to waste with door to door salesman.

That's why I prefer the pentagram* though I edited that in afterwards

JaceArveduin:

That's why I prefer the pentagram* though I edited that in afterwards

I have a feeling I'm probably going to feel silly asking this once I read the reply, it's probably a difference in names, but what's a pentagram?

RicoADF:

JaceArveduin:

That's why I prefer the pentagram* though I edited that in afterwards

I have a feeling I'm probably going to feel silly asking this once I read the reply, it's probably a difference in names, but what's a pentagram?

These things, tend to be used in literature n such for summoning demons of various kinds.

JaceArveduin:

These things, tend to be used in literature n such for summoning demons of various kinds.

Oh them, yes Doom 3 used them quite well. Didn't know what they were called, thanks for the info.

RicoADF:

JaceArveduin:

These things, tend to be used in literature n such for summoning demons of various kinds.

Oh them, yes Doom 3 used them quite well. Didn't know what they were called, thanks for the info.

Your welcome. A good book that deals with them is the Bartimaeus trilogy. It is completely fictional,* but it's a great read, and it goes into details about what they use for them in that universe to make the summons stronger, though not so detailed as to tell you each and every letter.

DeimosMasque:

iamjonah:
The end of Breaking Bad was good - but that alien invasion at the end was a bit out of left field.

My favorite part was Walt taking Jesse to the petting zoo and telling him, "You are really my son, that's why I'm so hard on you."

It was a nice moment right before the Aliens destroyed the meth lab. But it does make me think that Walt knew the aliens were coming.

God damnit. Do you guys not know how to use spoiler tags or something? I don't even know if it's worth watching the end now thanks to you geniuses.

Akisa:
Is it a bad sign that I've never heard of breaking bad?

I'd say it's a morally ambiguous sign.

iamjonah:
The end of Breaking Bad was good - but that alien invasion at the end was a bit out of left field.

I can't believe that Walt and Jesse were actually robots from the future the entire time.

I must be on some no-o list now as the last time a jehovas witness came to my house we had a nice long conversation that made him doubt his own words and he promised "To look into it". whether he actaully did or not, he never came back, so that works. Thing is, he wasnt a very smart one really, he could have argued his way out of it without much ffort but he didnt knew how and whoever is his superior probably would just do that if he actaully didi nvestigate it further.

MinionJoe:

Farther than stars:

I'm sure it is. Does your friend really believe in Celtic Neopaganism?

Yup! Started a local group/grove, has a household shrine, and everything.

OK. That's... interesting to say the least. I've just always wondered why. It seems to me that when you, as a society, have moved from polytheism to monotheism, there doesn't really seem any need to go back to a more primitive* version of religion. I mean, I really interested, but I do find it mind boggling.

*For what of a better word, but sociologically speaking societies do tend to progress from polytheism to monotheism the older they become.

Farther than stars:

OK. That's... interesting to say the least. I've just always wondered why.

His reasons are his own and he's not really shared them with me in any detail, but I will say he's tried several religions over the years that I've known him. He was practicing Tibetan Buddhism when I first met him.

It seems to me that when you, as a society, have moved from polytheism to monotheism, there doesn't really seem any need to go back to a more primitive* version of religion.

I'd disagree that monotheism is a step towards social or spiritual progress. It was the advent of monotheism that brought about the "my god is the only god and you are a heretic" mentality. Historically, polytheists such as Romans and the Norse were accepting and inclusive of other religions they encountered, often incorporating those foreign beliefs into their own. And all the modern polytheists I've met have been very understanding of others' beliefs.

Heck, I was raised Catholic and in all of the Church-sponsored classes I endured, not once was I informed of other world religions. It wasn't until I was free to move about society on my own (thank you, automobile!) that I was able to investigate other religions and belief systems. Polytheism would have had no reason to try and keep me ignorant.

IMO, people would be a lot more tolerant of others if they believed in more than just a single, overworked, omnipotent, omnipresent being.

MinionJoe:

--snip--

A very fascinating perspective. Personally, I have always seen the shift towards monotheism as being a manifestation of a more philosophical approach to spirituality, where the discourse of ideas, such as those of Kant and Spinoza, have more weight than any practical consequences of religion. Comparatively, polytheistic paganism was born from such ideas as Thor creating thunder with his hammer.
But I will admit that the success of the Abrahamic beliefs has something to do with their sociological propensity. After all, a religion that tells you that threatens you with hell is going to be more awe-inspiring, and thus more likely to keep you in line with that religion, than the more dualistic nature between man and god of pagan religions.

Anyway, you touched upon another interesting subject.

MinionJoe:
(thank you, automobile!)

Lately there has been a debate about the declining of the auto industry in Western countries. Some people put this down to the fact that people can now more easily converse with one-another on the internet, so that it is no longer necessary to travel to discover other world views. Do you have any opinions on this?

Farther than stars:

Lately there has been a debate about the declining of the auto industry in Western countries. Some people put this down to the fact that people can now more easily converse with one-another on the internet, so that it is no longer necessary to travel to discover other world views. Do you have any opinions on this?

The decline of the Western auto industry likely has more to do with the evolution of economies. A country's economy usually goes through several stages: the exploitation of natural resources, establishment of manufacturing, followed by a shift towards more profitable, service industries.

The United States has been solidly in the service phase since about the 80s. As Neil Stephenson writes in Snowcrash, "The United States does three things better than anyone else: Movies, music, microcode (programming), and high-speed pizza delivery." All of which are service industries.

Countries such as Mexico, India, and China have taken up much of the world's manufacturing needs. But even now, those countries are shifting more towards the service industry while other countries (such as Vietnam) are gearing up their manufacturing infrastructure.

But the U.S. still needs its cars. While it's not necessary to travel to learn, transportation is still necessary for commuting, holiday, shopping. The United States is spread out, with families and jobs scattered about, and our public transportation is rubbish (especially if traveling cross-country). We just no longer have an economy where it is profitable to make vehicles that are competitive. Workers are simply unwilling to work for the pittance of wages necessary to compete with other upstart countries.

I think we all been watching a different ending ov Breaking Bad cause I remember something about a cookie factory that was filled with sentient cookies.

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