Zero Punctuation: Exclusives Showdown

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Exclusives Showdown

This week, Zero Punctuation reviews a few of the next-gen exclusives.

Watch Video

Cool, a special. Not sure about the singing (don't give up your day job Yahtzee!) but I'm glad the PS4 won, so that's good.

First whispering jam last week and now "singing" this week, it's like hes trying to scare us.

I liked those lovely transitions, and some of the jokes (like the Killzone Heilgast one brought up in XP). But this just feels like a lazy E3 video to the point where Ryse is almost summarised exactly as it was in the E3 video and Dead Rising 3 has the exact same summary as the E3 video. It also just felt like smug PC supremacy which you could find in abundance (to put it charitably) in the forums, especially because the 7th Gen was completely forgotten in the description of "good games".

I wonder whether any of these games will be given a full review.

This PC master race stuff has really stopped being funny and has begun looking like crass bitterness. I intend to be a PC4 gamer this generation (PC + PS4), so I can happily have the best of both worlds.

I swear I remember "The Glorious PC Gaming Master Race" was meant to ironic. However, it seem to have instead been one of those strange moments like when The Onion predicts the future.

Only reason I might consider a new console right now is to start collecting those freebies from PS+ before they cycle out but then again I don't have a free HDMI port and those freebies aren't looking too hot right now anyway (I played a lot of Super Stardust and even a bit of regular Stardust back in the day but HD just didn't do it for me).

PC supremacy in this context makes sense, one gen of consoles is winding down, the next is winding up but the PC's supply of games remains uninterrupted and in terms of exclusives there are incredible amounts of games on the PC that never see a console port, mostly from smaller developers as it seems that consoles have now become the exclusive territory of the AAA blockbuster game which are becoming so samey that it gets hard to say "this is a 400$ improvement over what you've gotten tired of playing last gen!" For me it's extra tough since the AAA focus genres are almost all genres I don't like. Much more enjoyable to get, say, Descent with loot from some indie dev on the PC.

Haha I'm really liking the acapella while announcing the category of the game. I'm on a PC so I don't get to add anything else to the discussion, since I don't get to play any of these exclusives.

Driving about, driving about, driving about, driving about.

DeLukas:
I swear I remember "The Glorious PC Gaming Master Race" was meant to ironic. However, it seem to have instead been one of those strange moments like when The Onion predicts the future.

Seeing how he ended up with "another grimy basement next door", I'm pretty sure he was still being sarcastic ^^

You forgot the 4th way, the WiiU!

If you'll excuse me, I'll go back to playing the best exclusive of the year: Super Mario 3D World.

Yeah, if you are going by games currently out, there isn't a reason to get either a PS4 or a Xbox One. That said, I suffered a great deal with the PS3 because I waited to get one. I waited till MGS4 came out, and that was the biggest mistake I could have made, because that turned out to be when everyone else wanted a PS3. They were sold out everywhere, and I had to wait a while to play the game I already bought. That pissed me off because PS3s weren't selling at all before that point, in fact I never not saw one when I went to a store. Should have gotten a PS3 when they were available if I was going to buy one anyway... So yeah, I already have my PS4. Not going through that shit again. Plus I hate the slim models of everything that eventually come out later. I want the originals on my shelf, I will settle for nothing else.

Yahtzee Croshaw:
You wouldn't rent out the Royal Albert Hall for a "who can spunk the furthest contest."

This seems overly presumptuous. If you want to have a classy and highly attended spunking contest, then why wouldn't you rent out the Royal Albert Hall? Seems entirely appropriate to me.

DeLukas:
I swear I remember "The Glorious PC Gaming Master Race" was meant to ironic. However, it seem to have instead been one of those strange moments like when The Onion predicts the future.

Ironic or not, it is coming closer to reality now isn't it.
I never really expect any good exclusives at a console's launch (you occasionally get a fluke like WiiSports) but I'm going to have to see some better exclusives than we saw last gen to compel me to buy a ps4 or xbone.

I feel sorry for everyone who rushed out to buy these damn consoles. Then again I felt the same way with the last three generations as well. I mean neither has any game that is actually worth playing yet so you're paying for a big shiny plastic brick to sit in your house for god knows how many months until a game comes along worth playing on the bloody thing. In the mean time your only option is waste money on crap games or not. Never mind the first wave of these machines always tend to be the ones most prone to breaking. Just no logic to the whole thing at all.

Vegosiux:

DeLukas:
I swear I remember "The Glorious PC Gaming Master Race" was meant to ironic. However, it seem to have instead been one of those strange moments like when The Onion predicts the future.

Seeing how he ended up with "another grimy basement next door", I'm pretty sure he was still being sarcastic ^^

A little bit for sure. Lol, did you see the line in the credits that says, "I talk shit, but I'm wrapping up these credits quickly because my preordered xbone is ready for pickup."

And woohoo for Titan fall on PC. I'm going to be disappointed when it doesn't live up to my overblown expectations though. The hype is already making me mentally add features I'm pretty sure the game doesn't have.

Aardvaarkman:

Yahtzee Croshaw:
You wouldn't rent out the Royal Albert Hall for a "who can spunk the furthest contest."

This seems overly presumptuous. If you want to have a classy and highly attended spunking contest, then why wouldn't you rent out the Royal Albert Hall? Seems entirely appropriate to me.

It's more about the acoustics. While the Royal Albert is great for music, the halls reverberation time of about 1.5 to 2 seconds is a little much. As you can see from this reverberation time function, competitive spunking is best done in halls with a value under one second: TR[1kHz] = [0,4 log (V+62)] - 0,38 TR in seconds and V=volume of the room in m3.

"Driving aboot. Driving aboot. Driving aboot. Driving aboot." sung to the theme of Doctor Who. We have a new contender for miracle of sound.

Or, just get a 3DS.

Wasn't Knack an exclusive as well? Of all the launch-games it seemed most interesting, which isn't saying much.

That Forza bit seems like a real Kick in the Balls.

Nintendo for the win!

(and PC)

Yahtzee's singing is heavily.

"SHOOTERSWITH"

"faaaaaall in the name"

Yahztee one Selena Gomez none

I liked how the numbers kept just overlapping. Seems so bloody lazy, I love it.

Now, I want not only a soundtrack version of this showdown, but also a live choir version of this particular episode!! Now, if only someone would take the "Driving About" track and remix it to the tune of the Doctor Who theme...

So, yeah... PS4 and Xbone in one basement having a HD-glorified knife fight, PC in another basement that's much older than the first basement... and the Wii U is that sun that you sometimes see in the sky, but if we learn anything from our youth is to never look directly at the sun...

Talk about placing a Wii U metaphor in a Yahtzee metaphor... (I'm going to re-watch this episode again so that I know all the lyrics to the songs used during the video...)

GoddyofAus:
This PC master race stuff has really stopped being funny and has begun looking like crass bitterness. I intend to be a PC4 gamer this generation (PC + PS4), so I can happily have the best of both worlds.

^^^
THIS GUY IS INTELLIGENT

Im certainly going to keep my PC around for some exclusives, but primarily the next gen consoles, (X1 first at the moment) are going to get more attention from me.
The PC master race stuff is part of the reason I play games on console so much more though, I honestly don't like playing with the sort of people that call themselves "PC gamers" its a term that carries so much bloody self importance and satisfaction in the fact that their preferred *leisure time activity* is done in a mostly solitary, fashion on a device that is marginally more powerful than the alternatives, because for some reason that matters.

The attitude of self importance can be seen even here, where a comment bemoaning the fact that the X1 sold a million consoles at launch as being the death of gaming was somehow held in such high regard by all around that a fellow who pointed out that this doesn't actually affect anything in the real world and was a bloody stupid thing to get emotional about got banned!

Gaming, at this juncture has gotten too far up its own rear end, and nowhere is that more apparent than in this constant and eternal war between three different and equally obtuse sides, you have your xbox fanboys, your playstation fanboys and your PC fanboys, all of whom seem remarkably incapable of noticing the fact that they are just that, obsessives, people who define themselves more by their fucking choice in entertainment hardware than the actual things that they do in life, whilst at the same time possessing an air of victimisation by a society that bends over backwards to allow their preferred entertainment medium to be taken seriously, even whilst they do absolutely everything they can to treat people who just want to enjoy videogames, but also have a healthy lifestyle and (gasp!) Physical strength and a reasonable diet like they are somehow scum who don't deserve to enjoy gaming's many pleasures

At this stage I very rarely comment, either here, or on youtube, 4chan's /v/ or any other gaming related channel or site, this community has started to act so damned toxic towards people that have "lives" outside of pumping 2500 into a computer every 6 months that I actually wonder if it is a community that I have ever actually been a part of.

Also, I may just be a complete idiot, but did this video actually make any reasonable observations that could inform buying habits or which console to buy, or was it just a rant about consoles?

Thing, take out all the issues around the consoles themselves, and stick to games. For me, XB1 has the better game libaray, well titles that interest me anyway. An alot of the really good titles are multiplatform anyway. Eventhough, both consoles launch titles are fairly meh. But, i really cant wait for E3 next year, im waiting for then before deciding which console to buy.

The thing about lack of tracks and cars compared to Forza 4 doesnt bother me all that much. As long as they have the good cars and none of the crap....its quality and not quantity. As for the less tracks? Have yet to look up the tracks they have, some were boring anyway as we have played them over the last 4 games. Would have prefered if they added 50% new tracks and 50% fan favourite tracks and left the rest for DLC.

I figure I'm going to have to get a next-gen console once Kingdom Hearts III comes out. It'll probably be the PS4 because of brand loyalty.

xPixelatedx:
If you'll excuse me, I'll go back to playing the best exclusive of the year: Super Mario 3D World.

Yeah, if you are going by games currently out, there isn't a reason to get either a PS4 or a Xbox One. That said, I suffered a great deal with the PS3 because I waited to get one. I waited till MGS4 came out, and that was the biggest mistake I could have made, because that turned out to be when everyone else wanted a PS3. They were sold out everywhere, and I had to wait a while to play the game I already bought. That pissed me off because PS3s weren't selling at all before that point, in fact I never not saw one when I went to a store. Should have gotten a PS3 when they were available if I was going to buy one anyway... So yeah, I already have my PS4. Not going through that shit again. Plus I hate the slim models of everything that eventually come out later. I want the originals on my shelf, I will settle for nothing else.

I love that Nintendo fans got a good game they can wave around. It's been awhile since I've heard Wii fans this excited about anything.

LazyAza:
I feel sorry for everyone who rushed out to buy these damn consoles. Then again I felt the same way with the last three generations as well. I mean neither has any game that is actually worth playing yet so you're paying for a big shiny plastic brick to sit in your house for god knows how many months until a game comes along worth playing on the bloody thing. In the mean time your only option is waste money on crap games or not. Never mind the first wave of these machines always tend to be the ones most prone to breaking. Just no logic to the whole thing at all.

I'm having quite a time playing Battlefield 4 thank you very much. In addition to that I have Killzone, an admittedly generic shooter, but one that is beautiful and fun to play. PS4 also gave me Resogun, Super Motherload, Contrast, Warframe, and Blacklight Retribution. There is plenty to play, especially for a system that has been out a week and a half.

If it weren't for people rushing out to grab consoles on day one we would see more situations with the Wii U, where 3rd party developers are nervous to support it. Malfunctioning consoles are covered by warranties, so if my PS4 bricks it will either be repaired or replaced. There is no logic in preaching "wait and see" because if everyone did it, new games wouldn't be released at all and hardware revisions wouldn't happen.

LGC Pominator:

GoddyofAus:
This PC master race stuff has really stopped being funny and has begun looking like crass bitterness. I intend to be a PC4 gamer this generation (PC + PS4), so I can happily have the best of both worlds.

^^^
THIS GUY IS INTELLIGENT

Im certainly going to keep my PC around for some exclusives, but primarily the next gen consoles, (X1 first at the moment) are going to get more attention from me.
The PC master race stuff is part of the reason I play games on console so much more though, I honestly don't like playing with the sort of people that call themselves "PC gamers" its a term that carries so much bloody self importance and satisfaction in the fact that their preferred *leisure time activity* is done in a mostly solitary, fashion on a device that is marginally more powerful than the alternatives, because for some reason that matters.

What was that sorry? Oh, I just alt-tabbed from my 64-players game I've been playing for 6 years on my $400 dollar laptop, that I also use for work and school.

I guess us PC gamers are feeling way more smug precisely because of the underwhelming "next-gen" launch. There are not that much games, and the ones that are out have some problems, like low framerates and microtransactions up the arse.

DeLukas:
I swear I remember "The Glorious PC Gaming Master Race" was meant to ironic. However, it seem to have instead been one of those strange moments like when The Onion predicts the future.

I'd say it's less, "oh look, the Glorious PC Gaming Master Race actually happened" and more, "oh look, the next gen consoles committed suicide."

PC gamers aren't special, they're just not being dragged out back to where the poisoned Kool Aid is being served.

AdagioBoognish:

I love that Nintendo fans got a good game they can wave around. It's been awhile since I've heard Wii fans this excited about anything.

We still have the next Xeno game to look forward to.

And i think a 3rd of us are praying for SoulCalibur II :P

I may have enjoyed Yahtzee's signing more than I should have, now I'm not going to say that I was rhythmically moving my heading (I believe the word is bopping?) but... ok yeah I totally was.

Kataskopo:

LGC Pominator:

GoddyofAus:
This PC master race stuff has really stopped being funny and has begun looking like crass bitterness. I intend to be a PC4 gamer this generation (PC + PS4), so I can happily have the best of both worlds.

^^^
THIS GUY IS INTELLIGENT

Im certainly going to keep my PC around for some exclusives, but primarily the next gen consoles, (X1 first at the moment) are going to get more attention from me.
The PC master race stuff is part of the reason I play games on console so much more though, I honestly don't like playing with the sort of people that call themselves "PC gamers" its a term that carries so much bloody self importance and satisfaction in the fact that their preferred *leisure time activity* is done in a mostly solitary, fashion on a device that is marginally more powerful than the alternatives, because for some reason that matters.

What was that sorry? Oh, I just alt-tabbed from my 64-players game I've been playing for 6 years on my $400 dollar laptop, that I also use for work and school.

I guess us PC gamers are feeling way more smug precisely because of the underwhelming "next-gen" launch. There are not that much games, and the ones that are out have some problems, like low framerates and microtransactions up the arse.

But that doesn't change the fact that the mainstream publishers continue to treat PC gamers like gutter trash, which fuels the bitterness I was referring to. The contemptible attitudes of the big businesses in the industry is not the fault of people who prefer to play games on a T.V on their couch instead of hunched over a computer desk.

LazyAza:
Then again I felt the same way with the last three generations as well.

I do apologise, but by "last three generations" do you mean PS1 and 2 too? Because that is hardly fair. Yes, Ps3 and Xbox(es?)do have problems, but PS3's mommy and grandma are far from being "gameless".

geldonyetich:
I'd say it's less, "oh look, the Glorious PC Gaming Master Race actually happened" and more, "oh look, the next gen consoles committed suicide."

Well, that's certainly a logical conclusion to draw from the new consoles having record launch sales, while PC sales are continuing to decline. Sure.

AdagioBoognish:

I love that Nintendo fans got a good game they can wave around. It's been awhile since I've heard Wii fans this excited about anything.

There's a few, not that many, but still a way better quantity than PS4 and Xbone, yes I know, Wii U launched a year sooner. But the good is yet to come, Bayonetta 2, X, Mario Kart 8, Super Smash Bros. And with some luck we'll have a new Zelda for 2015.

Church185:

If it weren't for people rushing out to grab consoles on day one we would see more situations with the Wii U, where 3rd party developers are nervous to support it. Malfunctioning consoles are covered by warranties, so if my PS4 bricks it will either be repaired or replaced. There is no logic in preaching "wait and see" because if everyone did it, new games wouldn't be released at all and hardware revisions wouldn't happen.

That's bullshit, Wii sold like hell but 3rd parties still ignored it.
EA is ignoring WIi U not because of Hardware inferiority but because they don't want to. (probably buthurt due to the origin thing)

They think they can't compete with Nintendo exclusives, that's one of the reasons Wii U launched without a big game, so they could give a chance to 3rd parties, but they didn't take it, except maybe Ubisoft.

Aardvaarkman:

geldonyetich:
I'd say it's less, "oh look, the Glorious PC Gaming Master Race actually happened" and more, "oh look, the next gen consoles committed suicide."

Well, that's certainly a logical conclusion to draw from the new consoles having record launch sales, while PC sales are declining. Sure.

If you're content with a product so long as someone's making money, I've got a lovely bridge to sell you.

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