Jimquisition: The Shi!*iest Games of 2013

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The Shi!*iest Games of 2013

The year officially ends right here, right now, with our annual dose of bitterness and rage, courtesy of James Sterling and Skeletor.

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Well, almost got the top 3. Forgot about the AvP game. Also, my order was so off there.

Dynasty Warriors music hell yeah!

Ah well kudos and thank god for you Jim, may we have another great year to look forward to!

Kinda surprised that Batman: Arkham Origins wasn't among them. Other than that pretty agreeable.

Somehow I expected Beyond: Two Souls to be on this list.

But I guess it makes sense, seeing as how forgettable it was.

PsychedelicDiamond:
Kinda surprised that Batman: Arkham Origins wasn't among them. Other than that pretty agreeable.

Basically Origins, LocoCycle, and Knack were vying for that 10 spot. Knack "won" the tussle after deliberation.

Walking Dead: Survival Instinct was probably my top worst game of 2013. Mostly because I bought it to review it. I never finished the review because I refused to finish the game.

Yeah, I saw most of that list coming, besides the second Alien game, since I hadn't heard of it. The only other game I was expecting to possibly see was Fuse.

I'm also glad to say I haven't had the misfortune to play any of these, either.

Casual Shinji:
Somehow I expected Beyond: Two Souls to be on this list.

But I guess it makes sense, seeing as how forgettable it was.

Yeah, there were a lot of mediocre games, but being mediocre isn't bad enough to get on the list.

There were so many just plain dull games, I was half tempted to do a Top Ten Most Boring, but I am so done with lists now.

Really glad he called out Knack on the insipid bullshit spouted by Cerny and Sony to cover their asses. That they dared to speak of it in the same terms as the old Spyro games, and had the nerve to use the "kid's game" excuse in the wake of the industry's long history of excellent family-friendly titles, was deeply insulting to me. Super Mario 3D World being something kids could play hasn't stopped it from being a GOTY-contender (and winner, for Eurogamer).

Great video.

I was surprised when I found out that Knack was a full priced retail game, in the trailers and such leading up to the PS4 release it looked like a cheaper downloadable title.

I'm disappointed GTA Online wasn't named worst game of the year.... Or even made the list.

1 - This game's character creation is worse than Saints Row 2 or PS Home.
2 - There are no houses to buy outside of Los Santos
3 - The leveling system prevents you from stealing certain vehicles even though you can drive them.
4 - It also blocks you from keeping guns you've picked up.
5 - Its so troll infested the only way to enjoy the game is to stick with invite only & even then that means ignoring your phone for anyone inviting you to a mission. Of course you could also enter in that passive mode but it cost in game money & all that does is prevent you from actually playing & you can still get run over by a troll.
6 - And to top this all off it micro transactions the ability to buy fake money.

Heh, you got me, I was expecting Aliens:Colonial Marines (or whatever it was called) to rate higher.

Though, noticed a few franchise games there, wonder how less bad they'd seem (or less people would care) if nobody was invested in their franchise.

Star Trek: Trexels

Having recently watched Angry Joe's review on Star Trek: Trexels I half expected this one to make the list. Admittedly, it came out very late in the year and it's quite possible Jim never had the 'privilege' to play it.

Then again, it's entirely possible the game isn't as bad as Angry Joe makes it sound.

What does this Rooker guy at 03.58 say? I only understand: "Gibberish", in a game, what can be better then that?.

Jimothy Sterling:

Casual Shinji:
Somehow I expected Beyond: Two Souls to be on this list.

But I guess it makes sense, seeing as how forgettable it was.

Yeah, there were a lot of mediocre games, but being mediocre isn't bad enough to get on the list.

There were so many just plain dull games, I was half tempted to do a Top Ten Most Boring, but I am so done with lists now.

Do you consider this a pretty mediocre gaming year? I myself can't really judge since most of the games I buy are atleast a year old.

themilo504:

Jimothy Sterling:

Casual Shinji:
Somehow I expected Beyond: Two Souls to be on this list.

But I guess it makes sense, seeing as how forgettable it was.

Yeah, there were a lot of mediocre games, but being mediocre isn't bad enough to get on the list.

There were so many just plain dull games, I was half tempted to do a Top Ten Most Boring, but I am so done with lists now.

Do you consider this a pretty mediocre gaming year? I myself can't really judge since most of the games I buy are atleast a year old.

For me, it was a year of extremes. I think we've seen some of the best games of our time appear this year. I also think we've seen some of the worst.

And a whole lot of extremely boring shit in between!

Jimothy Sterling:
Yeah, there were a lot of mediocre games, but being mediocre isn't bad enough to get on the list.

There were so many just plain dull games, I was half tempted to do a Top Ten Most Boring, but I am so done with lists now.

It would be interesting to watch you try and rate boredom on a scale of 1 to 10 though.

Glad to say I haven't played any of those games, good to know what to avoid in sales anyhow. I also second geier's post I have no idea what that Rooker guy said either.

gigantor21:
Really glad he called out Knack on the insipid bullshit spouted by Cerny and Sony to cover their asses. That they dared to speak of it in the same terms as the old Spyro games, and had the nerve to use the "kid's game" excuse in the wake of the industry's long history of excellent family-friendly titles, was deeply insulting to me. Super Mario 3D World being something kids could play hasn't stopped it from being a GOTY-contender (and winner, for Eurogamer).

Great video.

Agreed 100%. That game really is an insult in almost every way imaginable. It's single-handedly put off my interest in the PS4 for the time being, it's down to Infamous Second Son now.

SO GLAD ALL THE BRAVEST GOT TOP HONORS. That game was essentially Square Enix trying to rip people off using nostalgia as bait.

I'm a little surprised that Sim City didn't rate a mention - not only was there a lot that EA got wrong with that game, EA's response to the fallout could charitably be described as a public relations disaster.

What about Sim City, Jim? How come that didn't make your list?

e;fb

Casual Shinji:
It would be interesting to watch you try and rate boredom on a scale of 1 to 10 though.

It's actually pretty simple. A bad game is one you quit in disgust after a level or two because you can't take it anymore. A boring game is one where you stop playing after a level or two because you just don't care. So you just rate it based on how far you got before you stopped playing. 1 being a game you finish and 10 being a game where you get bored before the end of the first level/episode/chapter/whatever.

Glad to see Army of 2 up there. Glad to see that it wasn't just "lolthisseriessucks."

I enjoyed TFD. It was far from an excellent game, but it was an enjoyable fun one. TDC was...I don't even know what to call it.

I don't even know most of the games on this list, though.

babinro:

Then again, it's entirely possible the game isn't as bad as Angry Joe makes it sound.

Yes,a unfunny parody of Hollywood bipolar disorder might end up exaggerating his claims once in a while. Or always.

His review makes it sound like a good number of non-free "freemium" games, which in turn makes it sound like he's only butthurt because it's Star Trek. Which sounds like our Joe.

So 1 first party, 3 from big western publishers, 3 from big Japanese publishers and 3 from minnows.

I guess your not a fan of Knack selling way better than Super Mario 3D World in the UK then Jim?

Mahoshonen:
What about Sim City, Jim? How come that didn't make your list?

e;fb

Yeah, I'm surprised that didn't make the list as well. The whole thing was a mess--and it still all hasn't been fixed yet AFAIK.

Anyone else felt like they were suffocating watching Jim's intro? Ugh, I had to take a deep breath after it, lol. I hate masks

It's a shame, the FF game looks kinda fun in a way. But I've heard wayyyy to much bad stuff about it.

I was looking forward to this, and it did not disappoint. I knew what most of the "winners" were going to be, especially the number one spot, but I wanted to hear Jim rant more about Final Fantasy: All the Bravest.

The only surprise I had was honestly seeing Knack. Not that it didn't deserve it, it is just comparatively mediocre to me compared to games like Loco Cycle which I found to be just awful.

I can't believe I didn't even know about All the Bravest, I mean wow..
That game is officially the harbinger of the kind of end that the Video Games industry is stumbling toward, a massive crash brought on by their own incalculable arrogance and stupidity.

I'm on the Sim City band Wagon. In a age where the internetz is dominate for a game to show just how poorly always on DRM is Sim City is a martyr. The game reeks of EA want and desire to capitalize their franchises in an effort purely to sell micro transactions.

Any chance Jim can do a shittiest AAA's of 2013?

Well that was like listening to a Jim Sterling show presented by Bane from Dark Knight Rises. Couldn't understand the start or end and the skelitor voices were terrible what was the game after kens rage I'm still not sure ?

I honestly thought Jim was going to hyperventilate and pass out at some point (that would be a fun one for the blooper reel).

I will also express some surprise at how the appallingly bad Sim City wasn't on here, but I can't think of anything to remove from the list, either. Also, I totally agree with that final fantasy game being #1.

Kudos for being comprehensible behind that gas mask, but boy, did it sound like it was uncomfortable to breathe in that thing.

I had only heard of about two-thirds of the list, so I suspect I'm probably safe from its clutches. I have this weird, masochistic urge to pick up Road to Hell if it Steam-sale-crashes hard enough, but after Duke Nukem Forever, perhaps I can restrain that urge.

Damn! I'm impressed Jim was able to find the only 10 games from this year that were worse than Gone Home.

Ken's Rage 2 sucking is disappointing. I bought it and the first one last week because of how much Jim goes on about Dynasty Warriors. I figured that since I love Fist of the North Star and enjoyed Sengoku Basarai (SP?) that it would be a good purchase.

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