Jim & Yahtzee's Rhymedown Spectacular: Dylan the Christmas F!*kdog

Dylan the Christmas F!*kdog

Put on your poetry hats and join two of the greatest wordsmiths of our generation as they fill your ears with verse.

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Why do I feel like Jimmy is trying to antagonise me? Like me specifically. Or is this about EA?Because Jimmy, there is other topics than EA and fucking you know.

I am a professional.

Jimothy Sterling:
I am a professional.

You are professional at being professional Sir Jim.
Fabulously professional.

I feel like that song will be in my head for a while.
While Yahtzee's would be perfect for a weird European film or a Z-list movie like Sharknado.

I was speechless for most of the video..

Yahtzee's took a turn to the worse, but Jim's was just weird, i mean, did i miss anything? did EA do something?

Yahtzee's is awesome. Jim's is... Dysmal Jesters-style (old Destructoid podcast) which I don't like but other people probably enjoy that kind of stuff.

Ok, did not see that coming in Yahtzee's poem.

I mean, Jesus. It was just depressing, then...

Jimothy Sterling:
I am a professional.

Obligatory thank God for you.

Wait, I thought Jim's dog was named Bartleby? Where'd this Dylan fellow come from? Did y'all pick up a rescue animal from the shelter? He sounds right precocious.

Jimothy Sterling:
I am a professional.

And, yet, that still does not make me feel at ease.

Just kidding, Jim. We love you and Ben "Yahtzee". But there are moments where we worry about you two. You would let us know if something is wrong, right? ^^;

Unfortunately for poor little orphan Jimmy, all he received was a Christmas Fuckdog.

Yahtzee's poem took me by surprise, I was not expecting that. Jim's poem on the other hand was more or less expected.

Yahtzee, was there something you never got for Christmas? Like a giant spider-mech?

canadamus_prime:
Yahtzee's poem took me by surprise, I was not expecting that. Jim's poem on the other hand was more or less expected.

Me too, I was going all like "well soon someone will come and adpt him and take him..."
...
...
"WTF just happened O.o"

Then Jim also came along... didn't help...

So Yahtzee had my favorite internet video of 2013 with his Friends at the End poem

Now (And I know 2014 is going to be a long year but) Yahtzee has my favorite poem of 2014.
That was incredible.

Let it be noted that I paused the video to comment before Jim even started speaking. Let's see what he has to say.

... oh... well okay that was...
It hasn't been 2014 for 10 hours and I already need brain soap. Thank god for Jim

Guffe:

canadamus_prime:
Yahtzee's poem took me by surprise, I was not expecting that. Jim's poem on the other hand was more or less expected.

Me too, I was going all like "well soon someone will come and adpt him and take him..."
...
...
"WTF just happened O.o"

"He's gonna ask for money for the orphanage... Maybe not."

Seems a bit ambitious to take on the entirety of australia though Jimmy. Won't you get hungry at some point?

Is Yahtzee channelling Jon Peters?

Yahtzee, that made me laugh out loud when the turn in tone occurred.

Jim... err... E for effort I guess? ;)

I want a giant robot spider too, because I already have a Wii.

In the words of Sigmund Freud: Sometimes a Christmas Fuck Dog is just a dog that fucks all of the stuff you brought into the house for Christmas.

...I might be paraphrasing a little...

On a related note: Jim: Do you want to keep doing this or not? I get the feeling that you really don't.

Guffe:

canadamus_prime:
Yahtzee's poem took me by surprise, I was not expecting that. Jim's poem on the other hand was more or less expected.

Me too, I was going all like "well soon someone will come and adpt him and take him..."
...
...
"WTF just happened O.o"

Then Jim also came along... didn't help...

I'll tell you what happened, Yahtzee's poem got METAL! \m/ Giant robot spiders to enact vengeance on your enemies? Fuck and yes!

Jimothy Sterling:
I am a professional.

Yeah, Jim, that's not enough to get Dylan his own animated Christmas special on major network.

Christ Jim, I wasn't prepared for that!
What the blue balling cum nuggets were you on that day?
I laughed my head off, that's for sure.
Not quite sure what I laughed at though....

Well, both poems have left me needing to scrub myself clean thoroughly, and we're only 1 day into 2014.

ZZoMBiE13:
Yahtzee, that made me laugh out loud when the turn in tone occurred.

Jim... err... E for effort I guess? ;)

E actually stands for Exceeds expectations in the Ordinary Wizarding Level in the magical world. It's one step below Outstanding and one above Acceptable. E is actually pretty good.

Evil Smurf:

ZZoMBiE13:
Yahtzee, that made me laugh out loud when the turn in tone occurred.

Jim... err... E for effort I guess? ;)

E actually stands for Exceeds expectations in the Ordinary Wizarding Level in the magical world. It's one step below Outstanding and one above Acceptable. E is actually pretty good.

You have a fantastic user name and avatar.

That's really all I had to say. I felt someone needed to point it out. I don't know how to grade it though, you've thrown me off my game in that regard. :P

Yahtzee, pure. Awesome. ;-) \m/
Jim I had to stop after the turkey mention, you reminded something my dog did a long time ago, I wanted to forget...

ZZoMBiE13:

Evil Smurf:

ZZoMBiE13:
Yahtzee, that made me laugh out loud when the turn in tone occurred.

Jim... err... E for effort I guess? ;)

E actually stands for Exceeds expectations in the Ordinary Wizarding Level in the magical world. It's one step below Outstanding and one above Acceptable. E is actually pretty good.

You have a fantastic user name and avatar.

That's really all I had to say. I felt someone needed to point it out. I don't know how to grade it though, you've thrown me off my game in that regard. :P

Thanks, my name is special to me and the avatar is the cutest cat gif I've seen.

Made a new years resolution to be less vulgar and then I listen to poetry where the word "Fuck" appears several times in every sentence. Something tells me this won't last long.

All right, I just had to pause the video at mecharachnid, that was such a horrible twist, I couldn't stop laughing. Stupid jokes in depressing situations are the best.

Not sure why, but for some reason Jim's song reminds me of this:

"Dylan the Christmas Fuckdog" is still a better and more listenable Christmas carol than what actually sees airplay on the radio for the holiday season.

So good job, Jim. Excellent poem.

Yahtzee's poem makes sense. If the kid can't destroy his foes with his shiny new mechaspider, he can at least take a couple of them out with the Wiimote.

Yahtzee takes the crown this week.

 

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