Dungeon Keeper Mobile Review - Wallet Reaper

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The in-game rating only let 5 star ratings go through but opened an EA support ticket if you chose 1-4. That's why if people want to rate it they go to the appropriate store to do the rating.

People are too stupid or lazy to log out and go to Google Play/Apple store to rate it lower.

I would just like to offer a little constructive criticism, if I may:

Jimothy Sterling:
The first block I clicked on was going to take four hours to excavate with one of two imps I had. Not a problem, I had a bunch of gems already. I used them and sped up the process. As I did for the next block. Then the next block. Then I had no more gems. I started trying to dig out a 4x4 room two nights ago.

Two nights ago ... and I am not finished digging out a 4x4 room.

You ARE aware that roughly 80% of the playing field is blocks that only take 4 seconds to dig-out, right? It's only at the very edge of the map that you have to worry about any 24-hour blocks, and even the 4-hour blocks are close enough to the edge that they shouldn't be too much of a hassle until your dungeon starts getting bigger. And the longer times are there because you get more reward for the time spent. The 4-hour blocks give you some gems (granted not a lot), and the 24-hour blocks are there to act as a barrier between the extra Gold/Stone Quarries.

The constant acquisition of gold and stone from mines (you can't dig gold out of the map yourself anymore, that would be too much like gameplay) means nothing when the real currency of the game is gems, and the acquiring of gems isn't satisfying because you just buy them with real cash.

Granted that you can buy gems to acquire everything; but the trick is that you aren't forced to. Heck, the game doesn't even badger you that much about it. Horny tells you about it during the tutorial and that's about that. From there you're free to buy or not buy gems at your leisure. Not once, outside of mentioning them in the tutorials, has the game bothered me about making gem purchases; in fact, I'd go so far as to say that this game is LESS intrusive about it compared to other games of it's ilk.

The map is small, progress is linear and predetermined for you (nothing to discover here, no secrets to find or a huge bestiary to attract), and doing battle against others is facilitated by a separate, stripped-down Tower Defense style game that lasts a few seconds and holds little strategic challenge.

The map is on the small side, I'll grant that, but it still has plenty of room for setting-up traps and mazes for attackers to have to navigate. And... predetermined progress? Granted that you unlock rooms (and thus the creatures associated with them) in a linear fashion, but that's really no different than the original; where every new level threw a new room at you which would attract the creature who prefers that room. Other than that, the only "progress" can think of is designing your dungeon, which is completely open. Both in building my own, and in attacking other players' dungeons, I've seen several different configurations. Some harder to attack than others. Heck, some people managed to put together dungeons that I would deem damn-near impossible to attack, but that other people were probably able to waltz through with relative ease because they were able to find some work-around to the trick that destroyed my army. There's actually a surprising amount of depth and strategy to be found in the game's attack and defense strategies.

You slap imps - on a separate imp-slapping screen - which makes them allegedly work more efficiently for a modest amount of time, though the time it takes them to do anything is so vast, there's no observable difference.

There's nothing "alleged" about it. It even flat-out tells you on the screen; it's a 2x efficiency boost, and it's very noticeable when you set an Imp to do a 5-minute job (yes, they do have jobs that take less than 24 hours). Heck, it's actually kinda nice when it lines-up with tasking them to do 1-hour jobs. Set the imps to work, slap 'em, and they'll be done when the 2x buff wears off. And on the longer jobs? Sure it requires a bit of checking-in to keep the 2x boost going, but you'd be amazed how quickly a 24-hour job (like the heavy gem veins you were crying about at the start of the review) flies by when it only takes less than 15 hours.

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Those are the only bits I care to poke at for the moment, but my point is this: If you hate the game, then fine, but at least be honest in your review. If you want your review to simply be "I can't believe they made Dungeon Keeper into a time-based game rather than giving it a true sequel", then hey great; at least it's an honest reason for why you gave it only a half star. When you have to sit here and make-up reasons for why the game is bad, it really does nothing but hurt your stance. Heck, the only reason I downloaded the game (aside from the fact that it's free) was because of your review (or more specifically, your video about it). And after playing it my thoughts were pretty much "It's really not as bad as Jim made it out to seem". As an example, the first thing I picked at in your review, was when I went into the game fully ready to be outraged at the game expecting me to spend entire days on just on block; then I get into the game to find that actually only certain blocks require that amount of time, and that most blocks actually only take a few seconds. Once I got to that point, my only thought was "Well what else did Jim lie about in his review?" Turns out, quite a bit.

If I can be honest, this whole Dungeon Keeper backlash sounds more like gamer entitlement (how DARE they make a Dungeon Keeper that isn't catered specifically to my tastes) than an honest review of the games actual merits and failings. And don't get me wrong, the game does have some; just that you didn't mention any of them. Probably because they aren't as big of failings as you would have liked them to be; hence why you just made-up (and/or rather exaggerated on) facts to try and make your whining sound more justified; when really all you had to do was be honest and say "I just don't like the format they used for this game". It wouldn't have been a good review, or even a helpful one, but at least it would have been honest.

WhiteTigerShiro:
If I can be honest, this whole Dungeon Keeper backlash sounds more like gamer entitlement (how DARE they make a Dungeon Keeper that isn't catered specifically to my tastes) than an honest review of the games actual merits and failings.

Sorry for resurrecting this post, but I just couldn't hold this question: did you played the original Dungeon Keeper in the 90s?

CaitSeith:

WhiteTigerShiro:
If I can be honest, this whole Dungeon Keeper backlash sounds more like gamer entitlement (how DARE they make a Dungeon Keeper that isn't catered specifically to my tastes) than an honest review of the games actual merits and failings.

Sorry for resurrecting this post, but I just couldn't hold this question: did you played the original Dungeon Keeper in the 90s?

And loved them. That doesn't excuse this review being blatantly inaccurate just for the sake of slamming it.

WhiteTigerShiro:
...you just made-up (and/or rather exaggerated on) facts to try and make your whining sound more justified; when really all you had to do was be honest and say "I just don't like the format they used for this game". It wouldn't have been a good review, or even a helpful one, but at least it would have been honest.

WhiteTigerShiro:
That doesn't excuse this review being blatantly inaccurate just for the sake of slamming it.

I don't know if you would be surprised that is not a uncommon practice with the game reviewers to understate, overstate, ignore features, and even not playing enough.

Is it surprising that Jim does? Yes. Jim, talks a lot about how the companies should be honest with the products (by the way, the UK authorities demanded EA to stop advertising their Dungeon Keeper game as "free"), and this makes him look like an hypocrite.

Is it understandable? Yes. Jim has zero tolerance for games that, unless you keep expending money over and over, limit or degrade the game experience. And then the way they ask you to rate the game is pretty much "give it 5 stars or don't vote", and that is the kind of tactics he loathes.

Is it justified? I say "yes", you say "no" (and I don't think there is any way we can change that).

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