Feed Dump: Your Porn Isn't Canadian Enough

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Your Porn Isn't Canadian Enough

Look, Canada is cold, don't judge us on what we have to do to stay warm.

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So, does it have to be Canadian produced or would enough Canadian elements sufficiently meet guidelines?

Or maybe just include one Canadian for each threesome with one of the other characters making a reference to the beaver? Is "Canadian Summer Girlfriends" taken as a title?

I mean, if we're going to do this, let's do this. Lord knows we have a surplus of pervs and people willing to take of their clothes for money...

So, it's already spring in BC? Guess I should really start thinkink about moving there. The view from my window right now is basically what you get when you open a new paint document... damn snow. Also, how do you get dehydrated in a storm drain ? And I bet those Celtic psychics didn't have the proper government training.

The Gentleman:
So, does it have to be Canadian produced or would enough Canadian elements sufficiently meet guidelines?

Or maybe just include one Canadian for each threesome with one of the other characters making a reference to the beaver? Is "Canadian Summer Girlfriends" taken as a title?

I mean, if we're going to do this, let's do this. Lord knows we have a surplus of pervs and people willing to take of their clothes for money...

CanCon laws are weird... like super weird... I believe it has to be produced in Canada but sometimes not even that's enough to actually get a proper CanCon label...

For example... Canadian Indie Band "Arcade Fire" wasn't deemed popular enough to count as Canadian Content on the radio until they'd made it big in the US and Britain...

They probably just need to get some Paul Gross/Celine Dion imitator/Parody porn going... that'd probably do the trick

Another porn channel falls by the wayside because it didn't show enough beavers.

It's not even bad here guys. We should all go on a roadtrip to Saskatoon sometime.

Also nobody brought up Mosquitoes for worst thing about spring. BC PEOPLE CHECK YOUR PRIVILEGE! XD

Unforeseen losses

That was great.

Oh and the CRTC. That's grand. Well, now that we know there is demand...

Yep. It's that lovely time for us Canadians. Where everything becomes a bog during the day and turns into a skating rink over night. It's lovely. Don't imagine British Colombians have to much complain about as I don't think they got as much fricking snow as the Prairies and Ontario this year

The Gentleman:
So, does it have to be Canadian produced or would enough Canadian elements sufficiently meet guidelines?

Or maybe just include one Canadian for each threesome with one of the other characters making a reference to the beaver? Is "Canadian Summer Girlfriends" taken as a title?

I mean, if we're going to do this, let's do this. Lord knows we have a surplus of pervs and people willing to take of their clothes for money...

Honestly, there's an entire quota system with production, casting, and crew all being taken into account to see how "Canadian" something is, and then the channel as a whole has to broadcast at least 35% Canadian Content each day, with, I believe, at least half of that falling in the hours of prime time.

So even if you had a half hour "Canadian Amateur Video" show, where all of the.. uh.. content.. was filmed by Canadians and sent in to the show, if the show was produced and edited in America, with American hosts, that would still only count for around 33% Canadian content for that half hour, or 16%/hr, or about a 0.7% Cancon rating.

As a programmer of graphics device drivers, "CRTC" means something completely different to me.

As for fulfilling the mandatory Canadian content requirements:

[Great White North] was conceived when SCTV moved to the CBC television network. Due to the difference in the amount of time allocated for commercials, each episode to be broadcast on that network was two minutes longer than those syndicated to the United States. The CBC network heads asked the show's producers to add specifically and identifiably Canadian content for those two minutes. Rick Moranis and Dave Thomas thought that this was a ridiculous request, since the show had been taped in Canada, with a mostly Canadian cast and crew, for two years. The request inspired them to create a parody that would incorporate every aspect of the humorous stereotype of Canadians.

The Gentleman:
So, does it have to be Canadian produced or would enough Canadian elements sufficiently meet guidelines?

Or maybe just include one Canadian for each threesome with one of the other characters making a reference to the beaver? Is "Canadian Summer Girlfriends" taken as a title?

I mean, if we're going to do this, let's do this. Lord knows we have a surplus of pervs and people willing to take of their clothes for money...

I believe the Canadianness of content is measured in "Ayes per minute". This has largely replaced the older measure of "Tuques per hour"

PedroSteckecilo:

The Gentleman:
So, does it have to be Canadian produced or would enough Canadian elements sufficiently meet guidelines?

Or maybe just include one Canadian for each threesome with one of the other characters making a reference to the beaver? Is "Canadian Summer Girlfriends" taken as a title?

I mean, if we're going to do this, let's do this. Lord knows we have a surplus of pervs and people willing to take of their clothes for money...

CanCon laws are weird... like super weird... I believe it has to be produced in Canada but sometimes not even that's enough to actually get a proper CanCon label...

I know in the case of music, it's based on at least two of the Music composer, Artist, Performance, and Lyric writer being Canadian. (That's what the little "MAPL" circle thing on Canadian albums is about.)

And, until 1991, a category had to be 100% Canadian, so a Canadian singing songs co-written by that Canadian and an Englishman and recorded in England didn't qualify because only the artist was Canadian. Eventually, the complaints were loud enough to wake up the neighbours, and the rules for Music and Lyrics got changed to "at least 50%".

I am so pleased that I am not the only person who hates Spring. As for the Canadian porn thing I just knew it was going to end up in feed dump when I saw it on Reddit a few days ago.

If any females want to help fill the quota with me, let me know.
It's our civic duty, after all.

Weaver:
If any females want to help fill the quota with me, let me know.
It's our civic duty, after all.

I'll fill YOUR quota.

OT: Why on earth have I never viewed an episode of the feed dump before now? Oh yeah, because none of them had "porn" in the title.

Man, Tally sure makes a strong case for that Canadian content.

I'm from Montreal and I have sadly missed the term "jouale". However, I am anglo, which is just fucking ballin' these days.

Sadly Graham couldn't be there since the theme was "things we hate about spring". He's out there appreciating the /balls/ off of this season!

Having escaped from Oklahoma myself, I can say that $20 is barely enough to cover the taxes and tolls necessary to leave the state. Also, stringent anti-porn laws. I'm never going back.

tdylan:

Weaver:
If any females want to help fill the quota with me, let me know.
It's our civic duty, after all.

I'll fill YOUR quota.

Look, I'll fill as many quotas as I have to if it's for the good of my country!

Sorry Tali, I have to do this
This Spring The Producers of Feed Dump present A ForniCanadian producion;

Tali Me Bannanna.

Cum Mista Tally Man...

(( we only Roast the ones we Love))

PS the BOLVE Media code to create this as I write it is "Worth Overdoing" XD

I feel the need to make a Canadian porn joke that centres around their tendency to say 'sorry' for everything... but I'll let you write it yourselves...

We had a show that had naked women in a hot tub and interviews with porn stars hosted by the puppet in my avatar for 13 seasons. It got the axe by the network when it wanted a more female friendly image.

Problem Solved. Give Ed the Sock his time slot back.

Well I'm completely erect, how about the rest of you?

Newhouse:
Yep. It's that lovely time for us Canadians. Where everything becomes a bog during the day and turns into a skating rink over night. It's lovely. Don't imagine British Colombians have to much complain about as I don't think they got as much fricking snow as the Prairies and Ontario this year

11 degrees and blue skies today in my corner of BC today. We've heard legends of this strange "snow" you speak of but have yet to witness it first-hand. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to walk outside in a t-shirt with no coat on for my daily maple-flavoured hot chocolate.

Canada! (...by which I mean BC!)

Holy shit, a Gully Dwarf reference! Haven't heard that one in a while. I simultaneously feel happy to hear it and sad because it makes me feel old...

So if it's 2 blondes from the states with 1 Canadian guy, would it not pass the rule because it's only 33.3333% Canadian content? And if so, would including a bottle of real maple syrup make up the difference? These are the things I must know!

I love it when Tally is on feed dump, it's always a delight.

???? Am I missing something? You guys know it is still Winter, yes? Are the seasons different in Canada?

I think we all learned some wonderful things from this video // Mostly about Tally but some other things too

I think we need to have her back on again sometime soon // Also, more stories about us Irish!

-M

TheArchbishopJubilee:
???? Am I missing something? You guys know it is still Winter, yes? Are the seasons different in Canada?

Depends on whether you consider winter as lasting over the three coldest months or from winter solstice to the following equinox. Canada usually uses the latter definition, but the former is common in other parts of the hemisphere.

Ok, round of applause because this one was out of the park.
Best stories, best reactions, jesus, I can't stop laughing.
I freaking love you guys.

SilverStuddedSquirre:
Sorry Tali, I have to do this
This Spring The Producers of Feed Dump present A ForniCanadian producion;
Tali Me Bannanna.

*chuckle*

Also - no mention of poutain? As a [n alleged] foodstuff doesn't it have double entendre action? http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=poutain

shadowxvii:
So, it's already spring in BC? Guess I should really start thinkink about moving there. The view from my window right now is basically what you get when you open a new paint document... damn snow. Also, how do you get dehydrated in a storm drain ? And I bet those Celtic psychics didn't have the proper government training.

I'm moving out to Vancouver Island in a few months. Can't wait. Currently on the prairies. While spring is definitely here.. spring here means it's only -10 and not -50...which it was less than 2 weeks ago. Its funny when people in BC complain bout weather. I was there in February and was in my shirtsleeves most of the time.

Edit: To be a bit more on topic... Do they even make Canadian porn? Professional Canadian porn? ... .... I'm at work so please don't answer that with examples.

As an American responding to the very accusatory title of this video:

No, YOUR porn isn't Canadian enough.

Get your facts straight, Feed Dump. (Shouldn't you be apologizing?)

</ridiculous hyperfreedom preachology>

Giving a whole new meaning to the phrase "Oh! Canada!"

...Seriously, how did we make it to 30 replies without that as a joke?

Also, I see no Mountie jokes and am disappoint.

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