Zero Punctuation: Daikatana - John Romero's B****

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Daikatana - John Romero's B****

This week, Zero Punctuation reviews the epic failure that was Daikatana.

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I really love this new jingle. Is that wierd?

So they added an option to get rid of the save gem system but didn't make the sidekicks unnecessary to complete the level?

All of John Romero's promises for the greatest first-person shooter ever was a LIE...katana.

You know P.T. is a free demo that is actually a playable game and not a pre rendered trailer right? But you probably knew that would be in the comments.

Wait, wait, wait, wait, hold up. You got a snowshovel to maneuver those brain-dead twats laughably known as sidekicks? Lucky sod.

Yahtzee Croshaw:
Daikatana - John Romero's B****

This week, Zero Punctuation reviews the epic failure that was Daikatana.

Watch Video

As someone with a few mental disabilities I found the whole "Retarded moments in retarded retards" joke absolutely.... hilarious.

Now let's all wait for someone with no disabilities to call you a horrible person on my behalf.

thanatos388:
You know P.T. is a free demo that is actually a playable game and not a pre rendered trailer right? But you probably knew that would be in the comments.

At least it's free, KOJIMA.

The Auteur Problem: Having one man's vision realised can be either unique and beautiful or utter shit, and it's really hard to tell which way a given project is going until it's too late. Having a corporate vision realised is impossible, as they have yet to design a game console that ties you down and steals your wallet.

Good stuff, you can get started on reviewing Season 2 of The Walking Dead, now.

Danm, I was really hoping this week was Five Night At Freddy's. I know it was out weeks ago but still given that it's the dry period of game release now.

In addition to Deus Ex there's also Anachronox which sits somewhere in between, great idea and writing but incredibly buggy. With all the fan patches and whatnot it's mostly playable today.

Never really heard of that game before. Forced me to do some digging and see which other great 'critical and/or commercial failures' might be unearthed before too long. Some I knew to be bad, lazy, or merely overambitious (ET, Duke Nukem Forever, Shenmue etc). What surprised me was to see Physconauts, Okami, and Beyond Good and Evil in that list as well. The former was actually no great shock. Part of its fame was that it sold very poorly initially.
However, the other two. I think a future episode could be done using either of those titles as an example of why 'high quality and great originality is no guarantee of success'.

Thunderous Cacophony:
The Auteur Problem: Having one man's vision realised can be either unique and beautiful or utter shit, and it's really hard to tell which way a given project is going until it's too late. Having a corporate vision realised is impossible, as they have yet to design a game console that ties you down and steals your wallet.

Well the thing about Daikatana is that we have a very good contrast. Namely Deus Ex. Daikatana. is what you get when the guy at the lead is too into being the guy at the lead.

Impressions unclear: Daikatana in Steam Library.

I think the biggest lesson should actually be "if you're going to act like a rock star, you'd better be able to back it up.

Loki_The_Good:

As someone with a few mental disabilities I found the whole "Retarded moments in retarded retards" joke absolutely.... hilarious.

Now let's all wait for someone with no disabilities to call you a horrible person on my behalf.

And while we're at it, let's ignore anyone with intellectual disabilities who might dislike the word "retarded" being thrown around.

Scarim Coral:
Danm, I was really hoping this week was Five Night At Freddy's. I know it was out weeks ago but still given that it's the dry period of game release now.

What? A review? Wouldn't it be better if he played through it? I'm sure the scariness would lead to some really scared reactions from Yahtzee.

Duke Nukem: Time to Kill did everything better, and it didn't feature sidekicks as dumb as a bag of bricks. In fact, I'm playing TtK right now.

Barciad:
Never really heard of that game before. Forced me to do some digging and see which other great 'critical and/or commercial failures' might be unearthed before too long. Some I knew to be bad, lazy, or merely overambitious (ET, Duke Nukem Forever, Shenmue etc). What surprised me was to see Physconauts, Okami, and Beyond Good and Evil in that list as well. The former was actually no great shock. Part of its fame was that it sold very poorly initially.
However, the other two. I think a future episode could be done using either of those titles as an example of why 'high quality and great originality is no guarantee of success'.

Psychonauts and Beyond Good and Evil were commercial failures The difference being that when they were initially released they didn't have the massive advert budget so they kinda slipped under the radar ... but both of those games have enjoyed somewhat of a revival thanks to steam and GoG.

Daikatana too. I actually made a point of trying it out...dear god it is a perfect case study for every video game designer... seriously. The mistakes start with the game and never stop. Playing through should be a course work exercise.

With the influx of bad games in the general market, I would not be surprised if this was re-made or had a sequel.

I recall liking this game when I was young and innocent and unaware of the dangers of the world. I even defended it because of that.

Then I replayed it and found that it was shit and that the hate was justified. So there you go..

I guess I was made his bitch.

Well, I'll credit Romero one thing: He did give us "I can't leave without my buddy, Superfly.
A phrase so ridiculous and strangely, so conducive towards co-op gaming. (even if it's in a semi-sarcastic sort of way)

I'm surprised he didn't end this w/ comparing John Romero to David Cage.

BigTuk:

Barciad:
Never really heard of that game before. Forced me to do some digging and see which other great 'critical and/or commercial failures' might be unearthed before too long. Some I knew to be bad, lazy, or merely overambitious (ET, Duke Nukem Forever, Shenmue etc). What surprised me was to see Physconauts, Okami, and Beyond Good and Evil in that list as well. The former was actually no great shock. Part of its fame was that it sold very poorly initially.
However, the other two. I think a future episode could be done using either of those titles as an example of why 'high quality and great originality is no guarantee of success'.

Psychonauts and Beyond Good and Evil were commercial failures The difference being that when they were initially released they didn't have the massive advert budget so they kinda slipped under the radar ... but both of those games have enjoyed somewhat of a revival thanks to steam and GoG.

Daikatana too. I actually made a point of trying it out...dear god it is a perfect case study for every video game designer... seriously. The mistakes start with the game and never stop. Playing through should be a course work exercise.

I vividly remember photos of "Not Released Yet" signs on the betseller racks where Daikatana would soon sit. It may have been the power of preorders but seriously looked like counting the chickens before they hatch.

I am so glad I never had expectations for Daikatana.

Atmos Duality:
Well, I'll credit Romero one thing: He did give us "I can't leave without my buddy, Superfly.
A phrase so ridiculous and strangely, so conducive towards co-op gaming. (even if it's in a semi-sarcastic sort of way)

Hell, the name 'Superfly' alone is already strange if you ask me.

Zachary Amaranth:

Loki_The_Good:

As someone with a few mental disabilities I found the whole "Retarded moments in retarded retards" joke absolutely.... hilarious.

Now let's all wait for someone with no disabilities to call you a horrible person on my behalf.

And while we're at it, let's ignore anyone with intellectual disabilities who might dislike the word "retarded" being thrown around.

That didn't take long now did it? sure there are people that get upset over it but there are other people who find laughing about it to be cathartic. What right do you have to take that from us.

The word "butthole" never stops being laugh-out-loud funny to me. It's possible I'm immature.

Scarim Coral:
Danm, I was really hoping this week was Five Night At Freddy's. I know it was out weeks ago but still given that it's the dry period of game release now.

Ditto. Given his predilection for horror games, it seems right up his alley. And if he was being serious about having a phobia of theme park mascots, I can only imagine what he must think of deliberately-creepy animatronics.

I think the trick might be somehow convincing him that it's not just 2014's answer to Slender. Maybe if I pointed out that the mechanics are reminiscent of Papers, Please?

Loki_The_Good:

That didn't take long now did it?

If you're assuming I meet your criteria, you're wrong. But that's kind of unsurprising.

Of course, the fact remains you wouldn't have even got that comment if you hadn't struck pre-emptively.

JimB:
The word "butthole" never stops being laugh-out-loud funny to me. It's possible I'm immature.

Trust me, I've tried maturity. It's overrated. Buttholes for all.

Loki_The_Good:

Zachary Amaranth:

Loki_The_Good:

As someone with a few mental disabilities I found the whole "Retarded moments in retarded retards" joke absolutely.... hilarious.

Now let's all wait for someone with no disabilities to call you a horrible person on my behalf.

And while we're at it, let's ignore anyone with intellectual disabilities who might dislike the word "retarded" being thrown around.

That didn't take long now did it?

Uh, no one called anyone a horrible person, and no one has said anything on your behalf. Zachary Amaranth was explicitly talking about people who are not you. I get that you're spoiling for a fight, Loki_The_Good, but you might wait to for someone to actually say what you're accusing them of before yelling at them for saying it, because it doesn't do your position any good when you yell at people for things they didn't say.

So this retrospective lesson mini-series will be a monthly occurrence on the first week? Fine with me.

Now to cautiously wait as the game released begin piling up after these months of drought.

Zachary Amaranth:

Loki_The_Good:

That didn't take long now did it?

If you're assuming I meet your criteria, you're wrong. But that's kind of unsurprising.

Of course, the fact remains you wouldn't have even got that comment if you hadn't struck pre-emptively.

Technically the joke struck preemptively (note the special written over the words think about what that means and who it was there for) I was agreeing with the sentiment. though since the criteria was people ignoring the happiness of an actual real disabled person to defend some hypothetical other who are quite capable of speaking for themselves... well, why did you respond then?

Really enjoy the new format and looking forward to other fresh directions for the show.

Loki_The_Good:
well, why did you respond then?

Because I wasn't just speaking for other people.

You do understand you can address multiple people including yourself, right?

You assumed I was doing what you wanted me to be doing because it was convenient. Nothing more.

Are releases that slow Yahtzee?

Why not take a crack at a Civilization game? Or are you waiting for After-Earth? (if so you can always look back at Alpha Centauri.)

Alternatively, there's the Dynasty Warrior series now that 8:XL is out on Steam, although I suspect your saving up your ammo for when the Zelda tie-in gets localized.

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