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Yay for wasting grant money! Now if we could go back to practical application of this guys talents the world can be a better place. | |
See this is what science should be about, researching the important things like how to avoid the impending zombie apocalypse. Or "Random Walkerpocalypse" | |
Well, if the zombie outbreak does happen I know where I'm going... I'm gonna go to The Mall of America! ^_^ | |
No. A mall would be crowded as Max Brooks would tell you. Social conflict may take it's toll and also food may be a problem. My home has a lockable steel door. The building's door is also lockable. The very narrow stairs can be very easily blocked by a few heavy props and zombies can't use the elevator. So we are again invincible but aren't in threat of a social conflict. | |
Just be sure to get everyone strip-searched to make sure no one was bitten | |
I disagree. I think the safest place to go would be Alaska. Everyone knows zombies are not equipped to deal with a snow-and-ice environment. | |
Well, apparently Mister Cassi hasn't read the Zombie Survival Guide | |
Can I join? I'll bring the C4 and assault rifles. :D | |
Could have easily quoted Dawn of the Dead, but whatever. | |
Jesus, there was a scientific study on this? Crazy. | |
Well it's not like Frank West went to the mall in order to escape or hold off the zombies, he just went there on a tip and made the best of the situation. If Zombie Apocalypse happened one day, I think I'd check out the shopping centre near my house. It's the only place that has any kind of firearms besides the police station - but we all know that you can't trust the authorities when Zombie Apocalypse happens. | |
lol, I could have told you this, without a fancy schnamcy degree and a neat little title before my name. It's good we have our priorities straight as far a research goes. Besides, no one place is safe.... only safer. | |
Hmm, but what if they come to the mall for some other reason? Stephen: "Some kind of instinct. Memory, of what they used to do. This was an important place in their lives." Classic Dawn of the Dead FTW! | |
RE: Code Veronica. Almost half of it takes place in Antarctica.
Of course you can! The more the merrier! Besides, if you come then there is less chance of me getting eaten alive. :D | |
I still think my solution of hijacking a Super-C class ferry and weighing anchor in between Vancouver and Vancouver Island is a better strategy. | |
A mall? How quaint. Myself, well I'm more of a sit-in-penthouse-and-sniper-from-luxury kinda guy. I think I've got it sussed pretty good. | |
Kazaa for Unspecified Use Grants. Now, if only there was a way to get in on that team... | |
Apparently Mr. Cassi is too busy conducting actual science (albeit ridiculous) to read a satirical work of fiction, by a former SNL writer. | |
Can I tag along too? I'll be the comic relife that gets eatin first. | |
Once again, I always knew I wanted to be a physicist. | |
Of course by publishing this study they immediately invalidated it, because now everyone is going to head for the mall. A zombie outbreak is no different from any other, the larger the group of people in a smaller space, presumably without basic amenities such as running water and power (have to assume worst case scenario), wouldn't do very well for very long. | |
Also a great strategy for avoiding those notorious S/NES-era NPC's | |
Yet another example of how much science is the best thing that ever was. | |
Excuse me, I've got to open a gun shop/safehouse at my local mall. | |
Part of me likes to think that when the zombies start coming, it'll be the middle of winter. Winter in Ottawa? Zombies all frozen. Could just stay home. Play Left 4 Dead. | |
I'm not sure if zombies can freeze... On the other hand, I know they can't swim. | |
I don't trust this man. I would rather go to Antarctica, where Zombies would freeze before they even get to land. | |
You have fun going to the mall and dieing. I'll just stay over here where its safer. | |
Why wouldn't you just go for, say, a well stocked tree house. zombies can't climb, no matter what lies left for dead says. | |
No, but they can pile on top of one another until there is a pile large enough to reach your tree house. | |
No, no, they can freeze. They can't swim, but they can keep walking underwater (provided the pressure doesn't destroy them), perhaps one day reaching land. | |
You're not alone. No real need for weapons then, unless zombies grow wings. ... TO SCRIBBLENAUTS | |
Next study: Chainsaw or Riotgun in Dead Rising | |
Well, now all they have to do is a study on Vampires. Seriously, what a waste of fucking money!!! They should use that money on curing cancer or finding Osama Bin Laden. Dumb fuckers. | |
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Science Proves Frank West's Zombie Survival Strategy Correct
A newly published physics paper says that in the event of a zombie outbreak, your best bet for survival is to hide out in a sprawling mall.
Physicist Davide Cassi at the Università di Parma in Italy asked himself the question: If I were being chased by predatory "random walkers," what would be the best hiding place to maximize my chances of survival? For the purpose of the paper, "random walkers" refers to entities that wander without direction or purpose, and who kill any human beings they come across. In other words, zombies.
Cassi used a physics model - called, of course, a "random walking" model - to predict the movement behavior of these not!zombies, and found that the chances of survival were significantly higher for someone hiding (presumably remaining motionless) in a complex structure such as a school or a shopping mall. Basically, the more hallways, stairways, and rooms a given building has, the less likely you are to be surprised by some hungry flesh-eaters.
Of course, this study doesn't take into account the zombies' ability (if any) to track down their prey via, say, sense of smell. On the other hand, nor does it account for the humans' ability to make like Frank West (or Dead Rising 2's Chuck Greene) and grab the nearest lawnmower, either.
So there we have it, folks. In the event of the zombie apocalypse (or, "zombocalypse") head for the nearest major shopping center.
Davide Cassi's paper will be published in Physical Review E.
(LiveScience, via io9, via Capcom-Unity)
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