Discover the Dangerous World of the Nintendo 3DS

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So in the last picture...Play too long and nintendo steals your soul?

canadamus_prime:
I don't get the second image. Am I not supposed to look at the back of the 3DS?

your not suppose to scare it!
it is not a fan of being surprised! :O

bloody brilliant!

Love the guy using it as a butt plug.

Sn1P3r M98:
What is the last one? I don't even...

Just look at it! What's it supposed to mean?!

image

dont look at porn with the 3DS because nintendo can watch you trough your 3DS cameras

i think #7 is warning us not to bling out our power cords.

dex-dex:

canadamus_prime:
I don't get the second image. Am I not supposed to look at the back of the 3DS?

your not suppose to scare it!
it is not a fan of being surprised! :O

I think that specific area on the back is where there's an infrared sensor that shewts lazor beems to connect to other 3DSes in the area.

I have a detailed list of what they all mean.










Dawkter:

dex-dex:

canadamus_prime:
I don't get the second image. Am I not supposed to look at the back of the 3DS?

your not suppose to scare it!
it is not a fan of being surprised! :O

I think that specific area on the back is where there's an infrared sensor that shewts lazor beems to connect to other 3DSes in the area.

Indeed it is.
it is like the laser eye sort of thing with 2001:a space odyssey.
I'm sorry Dave.

Nintendo should just save time and slap a "Common Sense needed to enjoy this console...safely" sticker on it

Sn1P3r M98:
What is the last one? I don't even...

Just look at it! What's it supposed to mean?!

image

That if you play your 3DS for too long, you will become a victim of demonic possession.

Zuul is coming for you! And he bears the Official Nintendo Seal!

I saw a youtube video with all the pictures, and one warned about interference when playing the 3DS on a plane. How about all the stuff that the 3DS is supposed to do when it is turned off? Can that also be dangerous, because if I can't bring my 3DS on a plane, that sucks.

Psychicflash666:
Nintendo should just save time and slap a "Common Sense needed to enjoy this console...safely" sticker on it

But that will eliminate 20 percent of their focus groups!

Sn1P3r M98:
What is the last one? I don't even...

Just look at it! What's it supposed to mean?!

image

Don't play it in the dark maybe?

HankMan:

teh_Canape:
this one is bullshit

image

everybody knows that there IS no way to destroy forged Nintendium

Now I know I'm not the only thinks that looks like he isn't just sitting on it.

The hell did you just try to say?

OT: These pictures are pretty epic.

Sn1P3r M98:
What is the last one? I don't even...

Just look at it! What's it supposed to mean?!

image

Don't be Surprised if your DS starts showing you porn

it happens sometimes....its just a glitch. . . .

i'm at a loss with the 2nd image.

image

Not G. Ivingname:

HankMan:

teh_Canape:
this one is bullshit

image

everybody knows that there IS no way to destroy forged Nintendium

Yeah, I know I'm not the only thinks that looks like he isn't just on it.

What are you...

O_O

Ok, people, DON'T EVER DO THAT.

"DO NOT, Under ANY circumstances, insert the DS into your butt. If you do, you will truly be fucked."

Who the hell would use a key as a stylus? Not only that, most of these images look ridiculous.

Sn1P3r M98:
What is the last one? I don't even...

Just look at it! What's it supposed to mean?!

image

Don't play in the dark, the 3D will overwhelm you!
That or ''bad for your eyes''

dex-dex:

Dawkter:

dex-dex:

your not suppose to scare it!
it is not a fan of being surprised! :O

I think that specific area on the back is where there's an infrared sensor that shewts lazor beems to connect to other 3DSes in the area.

Indeed it is.
it is like the laser eye sort of thing with 2001:a space odyssey.
I'm sorry Dave.

That further explains it.
'You are in danger from the lazor beems if you hear the Space Odyssey theme that goes
taan taan tan tan dum dum dum dum
If you hear anything like that beware the anger of the 3DS finding nothing but your EYES in the area and the beems may turn a harmful rainbow.'

1) Your 3DS is not a valid replacement for a babysitter.

2) Do not use your heat vision on any part of the 3DS.

3) Your 3DS should not be used to kill flies, mosquitoes, or other troublesome insects.

4)Do not attempt to shove your 3DS up your ass. This will hurt.

5)Your 3DS has a habit of breaking out in cold sweats.

6) If you take too long to make a choice in a game, your 3DS will fucking kill you.

7) Bondage will not makes your A/C adapter work better.

8) Your 3DS is not a car. Do not attempt to start it like one.

9) Don't whack your 3DS with a magnet while it is asleep. Seriously; that's just being a dick.

10) The 3DS knows about the porn you've been downloading. Give it $50 or it tells your parents.

image

Do not use Nintendo as recto-thermometer.

It's just not built to cope.

I just love these images.

And they can't even say 'Wii warned you' when someone does knock flowers over with the 3DS.

badmunky64:
http://youtouchmywiiwii.ytmnd.com/

That made me laugh so hard, my stomach began hurting several times.

All right, so lemme see if I got this straight...
1. Beware of rubber ducks throwing your 3DS at your baby... or vice versa...
2. Do not use your laser vision on the infrared sensor.
3. Do not use it to whack flower vases.
4. ... I'm not even going to touch that one...
5. ... Do not give it air conditioning on a hot summer day?
6. Do not play while drunk or high or dead.
7. Do not bind your AC adapter in demon chains and then plug it in.
8. When you see a keyhole on your touch screen, it is a freaking metaphor.
9. Do not use magnets on your 3DS while it is sleeping. It'll be sucked into an alternate dimension.
10. You are now under our control. You will do as we say.

so...wait a minute wait a minute.

Bulletstorm makes you a rapist, supposedly.
International EA Bashing Week ('11)
China is making a Starcraft/Warcraft/WTFever Land.
and
3DS kills people...

If Skynet comes into reality, just let it be known. CALLED IT!

HankMan:

teh_Canape:
this one is bullshit

image

everybody knows that there IS no way to destroy forged Nintendium

Now I know I'm not the only thinks that looks like he isn't just sitting on it.

I'll be onest with you there and say that I agree fully.

I can barely understand what they're warning about, but I guess it's for the Japanese... Hopefully they now know that they shouldn't wrap chains around the charger or use a key to lock up the screen.

Not G. Ivingname:
1. Don't leave your 3DS near the edge of a table. Your baby will learn of it's secret telepathic abilities and turn you inside out next time you don't give her a piece of candy from the store.

I said the same thing about that first one.

Mr. Fister:
I like Wired.com's interpretations of these warnings:

Thank you sir. Those images made my day.

badmunky64:
http://youtouchmywiiwii.ytmnd.com/

'What the hell are you doing? Stop it' Nearly choked there.

Hooray, apparently it's completelly safe to put it in my mouth and swallow it. Thanks for the heads-up Nintendo!

Has somebody actually looped a metal chain around the prongs of their DS AC adapter and then plugged it in before? good lord

HankMan:
Oh so you're NOT supposed to wrap a chain around the plug.
That's what I've doing wrong all these years!

Yep no bling on your charger, rappers everywhere are turning to the psp now.

you'd need to be a complete retard to hurt yourself in some of they ways they have suggested. chain around the plug? REALLY?

I really hope someone makes that video for the 3DS.

OK...

I mean, I know japanese instructions often include the blatantly obvious. (So do English ones to be honest, but we tend to go for written warnings rather than pictures.)

But... What exactly do some of these mean? I mean, some I have a good idea of, but at least 2, I haven't got the faintest clue...

What good is a warning that nobody understands? XD

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