Smartphones Linked to Promiscuous Teenagers

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Smartphones Linked to Promiscuous Teenagers

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It turns out your kids really do need that iPhone after all.

When I was a young lad, I was convinced my sub-awesome sex life wasn't down to my haughty attitude, poor hygiene or Space Hopper-esque physique. No, I was certain that the reason the ladies weren't flocking to my nether regions like hungry seagulls attacking an abandoned bag of chips was that I didn't have a fancy phone. Now science has proven me right. So thanks for that, mum.

According to research from the University of Southern California, teens with internet-enabled phones are twice as likely to hook up with random strangers for sexual fun times and are more likely to engage in said fun times without proper protection. The study, which claims smartphones open up "a risky avenue," - though I guess that depends on what kind of sites you're visiting - indicates that kids with fancy new phones are 1.5 times more likely to be sexually active than their clunky, Nokia-wielding competitors.

The study was carried out on 1,940 high-school students in Los Angeles last year and was presented at the 140th Annual meeting of the American Public Health Association yesterday. It's worth noting, however, that only a third of the respondents copped to using their cell phone to access the internet. It's also worth noting that teenagers' claims about their sex lives generally only have a passing relationship with the truth. For example: when I was a teen, my proclaimed list of sexual conquests included Courteney Cox, Sarah Michelle Gellar, Catherine the Great and Cheetara from Thundercats.

Five percent of the kids admitted that they'd used the internet to seek sexual partners and 17 percent said they'd been approached by sex-seeking strangers. Also, non-heterosexual kids are apparently five times more likely to seek sex partners online.

"We-parents, health educators, physicians-must recognize that cell phones are yet another new way for adolescents to meet sex partners," said Hailey Winetrobe, MPH, CHES, researcher at USC and an APHA Annual Meeting presenter. "Parents and school health professionals should talk to their teens about being safe in meeting people online and in using condoms to prevent sexually transmitted infections and unplanned pregnancies."

Source: Apha.org

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In todays news:

Supid people do stupid things, thanks to some generic and easily targetable product that we didnt have 20 years ago.

Technology does not produce unprotected sex, being born without a working brain causes unprotected sex.

This opens an interesting marketing strategy: Buy our phones get more sex.

I would like to see this study expanded outside of Los Angeles, start a east coast vs. west coast promiscuity study, could be fun.

What the hell am I reading?

I'm curious... I have never been approached on the internet for annonymous sex. How is that even a thing? Also, the "Los Angeles Unified School District" doesn't seem like the most diverse of statistic sources to talk about the whole teenagerdom (yes, this is now a word).

If this survey relied on teenagers telling the truth about the sex they have and how they use their phones, and they know they're telling adults this: Don't read into it too intently.

Granted, there will always be teenagers doing things that they aren't supposed to, phone or no phone. Being 12-16 and having the internet in your pocket at all times will certainly make those hookups easier to set up, I don't think we need statistics and science to prove this. There's something important to note though...

If your children are hooking up with strangers and having unprotected sex with them, you are failing as a parent and should know what they're doing. Do not blame it on the phone, or the TV, or anything else you've made a babysitter out of.

Quaxar:
What the hell am I reading?

I'm curious... I have never been approached on the internet for annonymous sex. How is that even a thing? Also, the "Los Angeles Unified School District" doesn't seem like the most diverse of statistic sources to talk about the whole teenagerdom (yes, this is now a word).

But what bout all those facebook messages that pop up on sites that aren't facebook? Those are real people right? They're in my area and looking for sex! Regardless of whether my area is 500 miles away from where I am, they're there and they're horny damn it!

It all comes down to the parents. Shitty parents can look to blame all the evil technology they want, but it comes down to the fact that they weren't being careful about their kid's internet habits or texting (the bill of which they're likely paying).

This is SO dumb I'm disappointed it was even posted as a news article on my favorite website. As a student of statics I would like to shout the following "CORRELATION DOES NOT EQUAL CAUSALITY!"

That is to say, it could be that those with more money get laid more... Just maybe.

I'm absolutely certain that LA teenagers are perfectly representative of all American teenagers, and that there's absolutely no reason to question this or any other flaw in this study and the reporting of it. Because there are no flaws, of course.

*cough*

LordFish:
"CORRELATION DOES NOT EQUAL CAUSALITY!"

Also:

"Parents and school health professionals should talk to their teens about being safe in meeting people online and in using condoms to prevent sexually transmitted infections and unplanned pregnancies."

Perhaps that's not what they should be talking to their teens about. Perhaps they should be talking to their teens about how it's absolutely insane to meet some stranger online and have sex with them at all and, depending on the ages of those involved, could be illegal. Less, "Be safe and take condoms," more, "If you're gonna have sex, just screw your classmates like teenagers have always done. And take condoms."

Captcha: It's Super Delicious

Captcha, what did I just say about my position on meeting strangers online?

I like my old Nokia and I wouldn't sell it for any other phone 'till it dies or i find a 3310. But really, how shallow do are those people?

LordFish:
This is SO dumb I'm disappointed it was even posted as a news article on my favorite website. As a student of statics I would like to shout the following "CORRELATION DOES NOT EQUAL CAUSALITY!"

That is to say, it could be that those with more money get laid more... Just maybe.

It IS causality. Teenagers with smartphones have more access to, say, Facebook for example. In order to text someone, you have to either get the number from them or somebody else. For Facebook, you could add a hundred local girls, send each of them a message, initiate a sexual conversation, and it's pretty probable that out of the hundred you messaged, one would be down for it. Just do that a couple of times and that's like, three in a week. And that's if only one replied each time.

LordFish:
This is SO dumb I'm disappointed it was even posted as a news article on my favorite website. As a student of statics I would like to shout the following "CORRELATION DOES NOT EQUAL CAUSALITY!"

That is to say, it could be that those with more money get laid more... Just maybe.

This was actually my first thought. "Yeh, so people who can afford a fancy phone get laid. WHOOP DEE FUCKING DOO."

Also: What the hell is wrong with these people deliberately looking for ways to blame "teh Internetz" for idiots being idiots? Geez.

(Face palm) Looks like some things never change...

Tough luck for the Nokia owners, they don't get laid so much on average, but at least they can use their phones to cripple any attacking sexual predators.

I'm gonna stick with my HTC 710, a phone from 2007 and is the size of a brick, until the world will end.

The battery lasts all week.....

And unprotected sex sounds like it could end badly. It may be fun, but it could definitely end badly.

And itchily...

LordFish:
This is SO dumb I'm disappointed it was even posted as a news article on my favorite website. As a student of statics I would like to shout the following "CORRELATION DOES NOT EQUAL CAUSALITY!"

That is to say, it could be that those with more money get laid more... Just maybe.

Well, I was going to say something along those lines, but you beat me too it.

So I'm just going to say the words "Spurious Relationship" and walk out.

Thyunda:
Didn't study statistics snip (Or at least not very well)

So you're argument would also hold for the study "People with expensive cars get laid more"

Obviously because they can drive round to 100 houses a day, posting pictures of their dick through the letter box.

Krantos:
[quote="LordFish" post="7.392781.15850347"]

So I'm just going to say the words "Spurious Relationship" and walk out.

The REALLY annoying thing is.. Clearly Mr Carter knew that the article is trash... So why bother clogging up my internet tubes. If I wanted this kind of tripe I'd watch Fox News.

This just in: Improved spontaneous communication methods leads to improved communication of a spontaneous desire to fuck.

LordFish:

Thyunda:
Didn't study statistics snip (Or at least not very well)

So you're argument would also hold for the study "People with expensive cars get laid more"

Obviously because they can drive round to 100 houses a day, posting pictures of their dick through the letter box.

People with cars get laid more.

Or to be more specific. Single people with a vehicle get laid more often than single people of equal confidence and attractiveness who do not own a vehicle.

Probable hypothesis? Maybe. Actual evidence supporting it? Check back later.

I have no phone, this explains everything. Thanks Southern California! Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to buy myself a smart-phone.

Am I the only one who sees the real point of this?

Grey Carter:

For example: when I was a teen, my proclaimed list of sexual conquests included Courteney Cox, Sarah Michelle Gellar, Catherine the Great and Cheetara from Thundercats.

oh grey you sly dog how did you ever land that chance and (most likely) glorious meeting?

The more people that have internet access the more stupid people there are online... I'm surprised that anyone is surprised.

Thyunda:

LordFish:
This is SO dumb I'm disappointed it was even posted as a news article on my favorite website. As a student of statics I would like to shout the following "CORRELATION DOES NOT EQUAL CAUSALITY!"

That is to say, it could be that those with more money get laid more... Just maybe.

It IS causality. Teenagers with smartphones have more access to, say, Facebook for example. In order to text someone, you have to either get the number from them or somebody else. For Facebook, you could add a hundred local girls, send each of them a message, initiate a sexual conversation, and it's pretty probable that out of the hundred you messaged, one would be down for it. Just do that a couple of times and that's like, three in a week. And that's if only one replied each time.

I'm pretty sure if I tried that I would be registered as a sexual predator.

LobsterFeng:

Thyunda:

LordFish:
This is SO dumb I'm disappointed it was even posted as a news article on my favorite website. As a student of statics I would like to shout the following "CORRELATION DOES NOT EQUAL CAUSALITY!"

That is to say, it could be that those with more money get laid more... Just maybe.

It IS causality. Teenagers with smartphones have more access to, say, Facebook for example. In order to text someone, you have to either get the number from them or somebody else. For Facebook, you could add a hundred local girls, send each of them a message, initiate a sexual conversation, and it's pretty probable that out of the hundred you messaged, one would be down for it. Just do that a couple of times and that's like, three in a week. And that's if only one replied each time.

I'm pretty sure if I tried that I would be registered as a sexual predator.

No you wouldn't. Because you wouldn't text "Down to fuck?"
You'd message something like "Hey I saw you on my friend's wall and thought you looked nice" and then if they reply positively you take it from there. You flirt, they flirt back. That's how things work.

If they don't reciprocate, then you simply close the conversation and pursue other, more profitable avenues.

And how is any of it illegal? They are of the age of consent (I assume, each to their own naturally), and once they say no you don't pursue it any longer. What will you say in court? Get all teary eyed and say HE SAID HE WOULD LIKE TO HAVE SEX WITH ME OVER THE INTERNET!!!!

We should give smartphones to Pandas.

I can see some truth to this, but rather from a different angle.

Teenagers who fall easily to peer pressure are more likely to have smartphones, as that's what said peer pressure demands.

Teenagers who fall easily to peer pressure are more likely to give in to or initiate sex, as that's what said peer pressure demands (with current culture likely the former for girls and the latter for boys).

Not certain though, as others have said correlation does not equate causation.

Thyunda:
Missing the point snip

Good point, you don't need an expensive car to post those dick pictures about.

LordFish:

Thyunda:
Missing the point snip

Good point, you don't need an expensive car to post those dick pictures about.

How is a sexual conversation anything along the lines of dick pictures? Have you...did you study statistics instead of talking to girls?

Thyunda:

How is a sexual conversation anything along the lines of dick pictures? Have you...did you study statistics instead of talking to girls?

HAHA, Ok, I conceed :)

image

LordFish:

Thyunda:

How is a sexual conversation anything along the lines of dick pictures? Have you...did you study statistics instead of talking to girls?

HAHA, Ok, I conceed :)

image

Your image doesn't load and this disappoints me. I feel like I'm missing an important part of this post. However, if I'm not, then I accept your concession and thank you for ending the argument in a dignified manner.

Also I speak from experience - I don't message random girls for sex. I lack the confidence. A friend of mine does, however, and I have to say, it's like watching a magician work. No clever words, no promises, no boasting...he just comes out with it. And most of the time people actually say yes.

EDIT: Oh NOW it works

B-but...

I want my sexy time too ;_;

No thank you.

I've had enough of people thinking that they're superior because they have a smarter phone. You'll get women if you are nice and take your time. Personally, anyway. But I don't think sex is linked to phone usage...

Thyunda:

EDIT: Oh NOW it works

Yeh soz, I changed the link due to hotlink block. Also if your friend didn't have a mobile, he'd still prolly get laid a lot.

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