Archaeologists from the Democratic People's Republic of Korea have discovered the lair of a unicorn ridden by the founder of the ancient Koguryo Kingdom.
Koguryo (also Goguryeo or Kokuryo) was an ancient Korean kingdom that spanned the northern and central Korean Peninsula, as well as parts of China and Russia, until its fall in 668 CE. It was founded, according to the Korean Central News Agency of DPRK, in 277 BC by King Tongmyong. And it turns out that King Tongmyong was a serious, certifiable badass - because King Tongmyong rode a unicorn.
Archaeologists from the History Institute of the DPRK Academy of Social Sciences have "reconfirmed" the discovery of a lair of the unicorn ridden by the ancient king, which is located 200 meters from the Yongmyong Temple in Moran Hill, Pyongyang City. They know it's a unicorn lair because a rectangular rock with the words "Unicorn Lair" carved into it stands out front. The scientists believe the words date back to the Koryo Kingdom, which existed from 918 to 1392 CE.
"Korea's history books deal with the unicorn, considered to be ridden by King Tongmyong, and its lair," History Institute Director Jo Hui Sung said in a statement. "The Sogyong (Pyongyang) chapter of the old book Koryo History, said, 'Ulmil Pavilion is on the top of Mt. Kumsu, with Yongmyong Temple, one of Pyongyang's eight scenic spots, beneath it. The temple served as a relief palace for King Tongmyong, in which there is the lair of his unicorn.' The old book Sinjungdonggukyojisungnam (Revised Handbook of Korean Geography) complied in the 16th century wrote that there is a lair west of Pubyok Pavilion in Mt. Kumsu."
The discovery of the lair, he added, "proves that [North Korean capital] Pyongyang was a capital city of Ancient Korea as well as Koguryo Kingdom." That, of course, is the point: demonstrating some ancient, handed-down-from-the-gods claim of legitimacy on the Korean "kingdom." And you know what? That's good enough for me. I love science!
That is all well and good, but what about Rainicorns?!
It's a unicorn combined with a rainbow, how awesome is that!PHA+PGltZyBzcmM9Imh0dHA6Ly9pbWFnZXMxLndpa2lhLm5vY29va2llLm5ldC9fX2NiMjAxMTEyMTMwNzU1NDUvYWR2ZW50dXJldGltZXdpdGhmaW5uYW5kamFrZS9pbWFnZXMvYS9hZC8xQVRMYWR5UmFpbmljb3JuTG9vay5wbmciIGFsdD0iaW1hZ2UiLz48L3A+
TizzytheTormentor: That is all well and good, but what about Rainicorns?!
It's a unicorn combined with a rainbow, how awesome is that!PHA+PGltZyBzcmM9Imh0dHA6Ly9pbWFnZXMxLndpa2lhLm5vY29va2llLm5ldC9fX2NiMjAxMTEyMTMwNzU1NDUvYWR2ZW50dXJldGltZXdpdGhmaW5uYW5kamFrZS9pbWFnZXMvYS9hZC8xQVRMYWR5UmFpbmljb3JuTG9vay5wbmciIGFsdD0iaW1hZ2UiLz48L3A+
Plain unicorns are so last year...like totally!
I think the ancient mongol empire rode them into battle.
I'm surprised the head of this so called group of scientists isn't actually Eric Idle. I'm expecting them to play the liberty bell march at the formal announcement.
TizzytheTormentor: That is all well and good, but what about Rainicorns?!
It's a unicorn combined with a rainbow, how awesome is that!PHA+PGltZyBzcmM9Imh0dHA6Ly9pbWFnZXMxLndpa2lhLm5vY29va2llLm5ldC9fX2NiMjAxMTEyMTMwNzU1NDUvYWR2ZW50dXJldGltZXdpdGhmaW5uYW5kamFrZS9pbWFnZXMvYS9hZC8xQVRMYWR5UmFpbmljb3JuTG9vay5wbmciIGFsdD0iaW1hZ2UiLz48L3A+
Plain unicorns are so last year...like totally!
Well Lady Rainicorn does speak Korean I think, so this is totally plausible. I mean it was labeled "Unicorn Lair" after all.
(This is getting kind of pathetic though, mostly because I think they actually expect people to believe their bullshit.)
So, wait, let me get this straight, Communists, who strongly believe that Religion is the Opiate of the masses and strongly believe that monarchy is a terrible idea, are trying to claim they're right about... something... by claiming they're... somehow connected... to a Monarchy which claimed it had the consent of God? Through Unicorns?
Well, I guess it isn't out of character, anyhow. Good to see Lil' Kim's living up to Daddy's legacy.
TizzytheTormentor: That is all well and good, but what about Rainicorns?!
It's a unicorn combined with a rainbow, how awesome is that!PHA+PGltZyBzcmM9Imh0dHA6Ly9pbWFnZXMxLndpa2lhLm5vY29va2llLm5ldC9fX2NiMjAxMTEyMTMwNzU1NDUvYWR2ZW50dXJldGltZXdpdGhmaW5uYW5kamFrZS9pbWFnZXMvYS9hZC8xQVRMYWR5UmFpbmljb3JuTG9vay5wbmciIGFsdD0iaW1hZ2UiLz48L3A+
Plain unicorns are so last year...like totally!
I think the ancient mongol empire rode them into battle.
Well of course, that is what the mongol ghost king told me.
This is absolutely wonderful. Now I need to start making conspiracy theories about how Lil' Kim isn't truly in charge and that North Korea is run by a secret council of unicorns.
lax4life: This is absolutely wonderful. Now I need to start making conspiracy theories about how Lil' Kim isn't truly in charge and that North Korea is run by a secret council of unicorns.
Ickabod: So this is how they respond that Onion article, oh North Korea, it's so cute when you try.
North Korea is basically on entire nation united under parody. Like the time they tried to dig tunnels under the delimitarized zone and when discovered said it must have been natural caves. With... somehow naturally occuring North Korean banners with slogans and all. Then they changed their position to a misdirected coal tunnel and to support the claim quickly painted some walls black. They are also really big in the coal mining business.
They have to be all in on this. It's a whole country of jokers spending all their free time laughing about how the whole west believed they were totally insane.
They have to be all in on this. It's a whole country of jokers spending all their free time laughing about how the whole west believed they were totally insane.
The sad part is: it's actually half a dozen of psychopaths insane enough to make you believe it's the entire country. Hell, the head of their national news agency is related to the Kim clan...
Spoiler: Click to ViewPHA+PGltZyBzcmM9Imh0dHA6Ly80LmJwLmJsb2dzcG90LmNvbS8taTl4NVVwTE5mRVEvVDJRVEM3dGducUkvQUFBQUFBQUFDMEEvSE55QnFDaW5VeG8vczE2MDAvMTI3NzgzKy0rYWJzdXJkX3JlcythcnRpc3Qrc29tZXBvbnkrbGlicmFyeSt0d2lsaWdodF9zcGFya2xlJTI3c19ob3VzZSt2ZWN0b3Ird2FsbHBhcGVyLnBuZyIgYWx0PSJpbWFnZSIvPjwvcD4=
North Korean Scientists Confirm That Unicorns Are Real
Archaeologists from the Democratic People's Republic of Korea have discovered the lair of a unicorn ridden by the founder of the ancient Koguryo Kingdom.
Koguryo (also Goguryeo or Kokuryo) was an ancient Korean kingdom that spanned the northern and central Korean Peninsula, as well as parts of China and Russia, until its fall in 668 CE. It was founded, according to the Korean Central News Agency of DPRK, in 277 BC by King Tongmyong. And it turns out that King Tongmyong was a serious, certifiable badass - because King Tongmyong rode a unicorn.
Archaeologists from the History Institute of the DPRK Academy of Social Sciences have "reconfirmed" the discovery of a lair of the unicorn ridden by the ancient king, which is located 200 meters from the Yongmyong Temple in Moran Hill, Pyongyang City. They know it's a unicorn lair because a rectangular rock with the words "Unicorn Lair" carved into it stands out front. The scientists believe the words date back to the Koryo Kingdom, which existed from 918 to 1392 CE.
"Korea's history books deal with the unicorn, considered to be ridden by King Tongmyong, and its lair," History Institute Director Jo Hui Sung said in a statement. "The Sogyong (Pyongyang) chapter of the old book Koryo History, said, 'Ulmil Pavilion is on the top of Mt. Kumsu, with Yongmyong Temple, one of Pyongyang's eight scenic spots, beneath it. The temple served as a relief palace for King Tongmyong, in which there is the lair of his unicorn.' The old book Sinjungdonggukyojisungnam (Revised Handbook of Korean Geography) complied in the 16th century wrote that there is a lair west of Pubyok Pavilion in Mt. Kumsu."
The discovery of the lair, he added, "proves that [North Korean capital] Pyongyang was a capital city of Ancient Korea as well as Koguryo Kingdom." That, of course, is the point: demonstrating some ancient, handed-down-from-the-gods claim of legitimacy on the Korean "kingdom." And you know what? That's good enough for me. I love science!
Source: Korean News
(horn)
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