Scientists Uncover Vampire Graveyard In Poland

Scientists Uncover Vampire Graveyard In Poland

Edward Cullen (Twilight)

A newly unearthed grave in Gliwice, Poland contains four skeletons that appear to have once belonged to suspected creatures of the night.

While attempting to construct a road in the southern Polish city of Gliwice, workers stumbled upon an ancient grave site. In Europe this isn't particularly shocking as humans have been living and dying in that part of the world for millennia, but these particular corpses were something special. Each skeleton had been decapitated and its head had been placed between its legs. Further, the deceased were buried with none of their earthly possessions - an oddity, given that such has been the tradition in human burial for most of civilized history.

Of course, if your fellow villagers suspect that you might be a vampire, all standard burial procedures fly out the window (like so many screeching bats). According to ancient tradition, by removing the potential vampire's head and placing it between their legs, the mythological scourge should have a much more difficult time rising from the grave to feast on the blood of the living. This tradition also explains the spartan condition of the graves, as any items left inside the tomb could hypothetically be used by the vampire to dig his or her way out. If nothing else, our ancestors were very thorough.

There is one worrying issue with this discovery however: Scientists are currently unable to determine when these bodies were placed in the ground. Records indicate that anti-vampire burials took place in Poland as recently as 1914, and until the results of tests to determine the exact age of the skeletons arrive, researchers are operating under the assumption that they were buried in the "early modern period."

While the prevailing (and most interesting) theory surrounding these corpses holds that they were suspected bloodsuckers, there's also a competing theory which views the bodies as victims of cholera. Why did that necessitate the removal of their heads, either pre- or posthumously? That's unclear, but mankind has been lopping off heads with very little provocation for centuries. Is it that difficult to imagine someone seeing decapitation as a solid cure for cholera?

Source: Polskie Radio

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Decapitation: The second best cure for hunger

Awwww, I honestly was hoping there'd be a bit about wooden stakes lodged in their chests. But I guess the head-between-the-legs thing is good enough.

On a side-note, this is a perfect excuse for me to post one of my favorite Futurama gags!


:3

Something about using Edward Cullen as a representative for vampires is really sad.

I was expecting they found skulls with fangs. Which would have been an explainable mutation of longer canines.

But nope, just weird burial rituals.

And this story has a tag for Scotland because...?

Realmikebob:
And this story has a tag for Scotland because...?

That's where all vampires live these days, no sunlight.

RJ 17:
Awwww, I honestly was hoping there'd be a bit about wooden stakes lodged in their chests. But I guess the head-between-the-legs thing is good enough.

Yeah, sometimes they get really zany, brick between the teeth, buried face down stuff.

Realmikebob:
And this story has a tag for Scotland because...?

For the same reason the source is attributed to the BBC, despite linking to Thenews.pl and not being reported by the BBC at all.

Scotland, Poland, British Broadcasting Corporation, whatever... it's all in Europe, so they're practically next door to each other, right?

frobalt:
Something about using Edward Cullen as a representative for vampires is really sad.

Indeed a shame towards tradition. Brad Pitt has done a better job than that sob cheated man.

Cholera?
Yeah right. We know Mermaids are real now so why not Vampires? ;)

Really? You have hundreds of vampires to pick from and you decide to go with THAT?

frobalt:
Something about using Edward Cullen as a representative for vampires is really sad.

Seriously, the worst part about this article is that the writer used a forest fairy instead of Bella Lugosi...

Angelous Wang:

Realmikebob:
And this story has a tag for Scotland because...?

That's where all vampires live these days, no sunlight.

Nah, we only get witches, plesiosaurs, kelpies and weegies.

Head between their legs? Vampires must have been college Co-Eds.

frobalt:
Something about using Edward Cullen as a representative for vampires is really sad.

Realmikebob:
And this story has a tag for Scotland because...?

Jamash:
For the same reason the source is attributed to the BBC, despite linking to Thenews.pl and not being reported by the BBC at all.

Scotland, Poland, British Broadcasting Corporation, whatever... it's all in Europe, so they're practically next door to each other, right?

Because it's a Cavalli article.

You chose the wrong picture of a vampire for this article
this one would be much better
image
how could one go wrong with Alucard

To be fair, people who've been decapitated don't complain about cholera.

The picture chosen is a really bad choice. If someone didn't know the character, they might not be able to tell he's a vampire. At least get a picture with his fangs!

Earnest Cavalli:
Records indicate that anti-vampire burials took place in Poland as recently as 1914.

And then they stopped, and the Nazis' rose to power. Coincedence?

Its worrying that when vampires are mentioned the first thought was twilight..

stabnex:
For the same reason the source is attributed to the BBC, despite linking to Thenews.pl and not being reported by the BBC at all.

Scotland, Poland, British Broadcasting Corporation, whatever... it's all in Europe, so they're practically next door to each other, right?

Typo. Since fixed. Etcetera.

Earnest Cavalli:
In Europe this isn't particularly shocking as humans have been living and dying in that part of the world for millennia

Because humans haven't been living and dying in every part of the world for millennia? Need I remind you that America, from the Iroquois around Lake Huron in the north, down through central America and the Andes in the south, was home to some of the largest, pre-industrial cities ever constructed? Cities that only a handful of Roman cities managed to come near to equaling? Or that China's cities have held millions of souls for the last 2000 years?

It's just an ignorant statement, as though us Americans aren't really used to such craziness, or that only Europe has had such a sophisticated society in all the world as to have had such ancient burial grounds.

American Indians didn't lack grave yards, rather American cities aren't built on top of ancient Native settlements.

I'm just saying.

EDIT: and WHY would you use a twilight photo?!

Earnest Cavalli:
Why did that necessitate the removal of their heads, either pre- or posthumously? That's unclear, but mankind has been lopping off heads with very little provocation for centuries.

What, no mention of Vlad the Impaler? C'mon, I'm pretty sure the universe brought about this discovery specifically so that the journalists reporting on it would make the connection. Poor form, Mr. Cavalli.

How did she die doctor? Was she in pain?

 Yes, she was in great pain! Then we cut off her head, and drove a stake through her heart, and burned it, and then she found peace. 

More vampire burials found ech. And it was suspected that it went as far as poland too but now we got hard proof of that. i guess i can call Polish people vampires now, thank you.

P.S. how does a guy that looks like hes about to rape you link up with vampires? i dont understand the image? why use a gigolo?

Some kind of old-schooled witch hunt? Maybe they assumed these individuals were vampires and killed them.

Reincarnatedwolfgod:
You chose the wrong picture of a vampire for this article
this one would be much better
image
how could one go wrong with Alucard

I'm not a big fan of vampires, but Alucard is on a whole other level of awesomeness.

OT: This is cool and all, but I find that hardly compelling. If the skulls had fangs, or the skeletons were unique with some off-the-wall DNA then I would of been hyped. This story however, just shows you how much we haven't uncovered in the world. Someday, we may come across something truly epic.

Earnest Cavalli:
Is it that difficult to imagine someone seeing decapitation as a solid cure for cholera?

If I don't have cough medicine on me I would then resort to decapitation to cure colds.
Also works for headaches! ;P

"The Early Modern Period"
- you do know that's historian/archaeologist speak for 16th-19th Century right?

kailus13:

Earnest Cavalli:
Records indicate that anti-vampire burials took place in Poland as recently as 1914.

And then they stopped, and the Nazis' rose to power. Coincedence?

I know you're just being silly, but the Nazis weren't really a powerful political party in Germany until the 1930s.

1914 was the beginning of the WWI era.

CriticKitten:

kailus13:

Earnest Cavalli:
Records indicate that anti-vampire burials took place in Poland as recently as 1914.

And then they stopped, and the Nazis' rose to power. Coincedence?

I know you're just being silly, but the Nazis weren't really a powerful political party in Germany until the 1930s.

1914 was the beginning of the WWI era.

But vampires were a powerful political party in Germany as late as 1922.

If I know my stuff, once their heads are recombined with their bodies those vampires will once again become a menace.

 

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