Man Hospitalized After Zelda Sword Stabbing

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Man Hospitalized After Zelda Sword Stabbing

Zelda Stabbing

A Texas resident was hospitalized with multiple stab wounds after an altercation involving a replica Master Sword.

Usually when real world violence and video games meet it's a dubious case of some politician spouting off rhetoric about blaming the latter for the former. That said, the residents of Katy, Texas recently found themselves witness to the rare case of violence and video games meeting in an actual, tangible way.

It all began this past Saturday when Eugene Thompson got into an argument with his girlfriend's estranged husband, whom she had invited to her home. The altercation quickly became violent, leading Thompson to retreat to his bedroom where he had several swords, including a replica of the Master Sword from The Legend of Zelda. "I heard him heading to the bedroom where I was, so I jumped in the closet and I grabbed one of my replica swords, and I pulled it out and stood at the doorway, and he was coming down the hallway at me while I was yelling, 'Go away, you don't live here," explained Thompson. "He just walked right into the point of the sword, I don't know if he thought it was a toy."

After the initial stabbing the husband left the house and Thompson locked the door. Unwilling to actually leave however the husband broke through the front door and the fight continued. According to police deputies the two brawled over the sword resulting in several more stab wounds for the assailant. Thompson meanwhile came out with a nasty cut on his head after his girlfriend's husband "dinged" his head with a flower pot. Both men were transported for treatment (at separate hospitals) after police arrived.

Now, obviously we don't want to make light of what was likely a scary situation, especially since Thompson's girlfriend's husband was in critical condition after the fight was broken up. That said, the assailant should probably consider himself lucky it was just the Master Sword. If it had been the Biggoron Sword he'd probably be dead.

Source: Click2Houston

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Now we wait. Wait until some news network uses this as a way to say "video games are bad", since the guy was "wielding" a replica sword from a video game.

Good on him protecting himself. Don't have much else to add. Kudos buddy.

The fact that he got hit with a flower pot is fucking perfect.

You go, guy. Seriously.

Could have been worse, had that been a replica Call of Duty knife he'd be dead the second it touched him.

I would like to praise this guy, except that the article here forgot to mention that the ex-husband (the one who was stabbed) was called over and invited into the house by the girlfriend. And though I don't know this for a fact, the wording of the full article linked here and another which I read this morning imply that this is not actually Thompson's house, but one his girlfriend owns which he stays at.

I'm not sure I can justify Thompson turning a sword on a man for refusing to leave a house that he was invited into, and which Thompson doesn't own either.

I wouldn't be to worried about idiot news channels using this as fodder for their anti-video game BS. Master Sword or not the guy was just trying to defend himself from the ex-husband. This story probably wouldn't even be here if he had grabbed any other sword, unless he has more video game replicas.

CruxisCalling:
I would like to praise this guy, except that the article here forgot to mention that the ex-husband (the one who was stabbed) was called over and invited into the house by the girlfriend. And though I don't know this for a fact, the wording of the full article linked here and another which I read this morning imply that this is not actually Thompson's house, but one his girlfriend owns which he stays at.

I'm not sure I can justify Thompson turning a sword on a man for refusing to leave a house that he was invited into, and which Thompson doesn't own either.

You're right. I should have made a clearer note of that. I made a slight adjustment to make things clearer. Thanks!

6 comments a not a single "its dangerous to go alone, take this" joke?

CruxisCalling:
I would like to praise this guy, except that the article here forgot to mention that the ex-husband (the one who was stabbed) was called over and invited into the house by the girlfriend. And though I don't know this for a fact, the wording of the full article linked here and another which I read this morning imply that this is not actually Thompson's house, but one his girlfriend owns which he stays at.

I'm not sure I can justify Thompson turning a sword on a man for refusing to leave a house that he was invited into, and which Thompson doesn't own either.

and at no point they thought about calling thompson's girlfriend?

i thought the guy was just the standard crazy jealous ex-husband, this misunderstanding couldve been solved in 5 minutes

Out of all this, I must ask: What kind of moron just WALKS into a freaking sword? There's dumb, and then there's REALLY dumb.

I don't care if it looks like a real sword or a fake sword, if someone is holding a piece of sharp-looking metal in my general direction, I'm going to take note of it.

This is why you don't stay in touch with your crazy exes.

Leemaster777:
Out of all this, I must ask: What kind of moron just WALKS into a freaking sword? There's dumb, and then there's REALLY dumb.

I don't care if it looks like a real sword or a fake sword, if someone is holding a piece of sharp-looking metal in my general direction, I'm going to take note of it.

You'd also figure that after the initial stab wound he wouldn't go back in knowing the guy had a full-sized, sharpened, and probably rather sturdy, sword and was willing to use it defensively at the very least. I mean, I can see him writing the guy off as a geek at first but after being wounded by a guy with a fucking sword, especially while he is still holding it, it's just not very smart to go back for seconds without at least something to parry or block with.
This guy really doesn't help the stereotype of texans as ballsy dumbasses. Not that I'm trying to say Texans all are, but manifesting the negative stereotypes applied to your culture/subculture/ethnic group is generally something to avoid.

StewShearer:

Now, obviously we don't want to make light of what was likely a scary situation, especially since Thompson's girlfriend's husband was in critical condition after the fight was broken up. That said, the assailant should probably consider himself lucky it was just the Master Sword. If it had been the Biggoron Sword he'd probably be dead.

Am I the only person who thinks this is like the best joke ever? There's a sneaking suspicion that this entire story was probably orchestrated by a higher power for that fucking joke to be stated.

MrMixelPixel:

StewShearer:

Now, obviously we don't want to make light of what was likely a scary situation, especially since Thompson's girlfriend's husband was in critical condition after the fight was broken up. That said, the assailant should probably consider himself lucky it was just the Master Sword. If it had been the Biggoron Sword he'd probably be dead.

Am I the only person who thinks this is like the best joke ever? There's a sneaking suspicion that this entire story was probably orchestrated by a higher power for that fucking joke to be stated.

Well considering that the swordsman was subdued by a pot to the head, I wouldn't rule it out. It's all just too perfect to have been sheer coincidence. Kind of like that rock in a national park whose name I've forgotten which was perfectly balanced on a point maybe a few inches in diameter until some idiots pushed it over. No way it just got there by accident.

Thank goodness there wasn't a chicken involved, otherwise things would have been A LOT messier.

6 comments a not a single "its dangerous to go alone, take this" joke?

Somewhere, the ex-husband's crazy uncle is saying "I Told him that going alone and unharmed to his ex's house was dangerous! Young people these days, they never listen"

Ftaghn To You Too:
The fact that he got hit with a flower pot is fucking perfect.

You go, guy. Seriously.

That's the part where I started laughing, because it's still a horrific thing that someone got stabbed, even if it's with the master sword. It's like someone being impaled on a twelve foot dildo, sure it sounds funny but you wouldn't be able to close your eyes for a week if you actually saw such a thing. However when something a serendipitous as that happens all horror comes to a screeching halt.

Actually, I'm just wondering where he got that replica from. Sturdy and sharp enough to stab someone with? Several times? A lot of Master Sword replica's are usually made out of cheap plastic.

Yeah just because it is a replica does not inherently mean it is not dangerous. I am someone who owns many weapons that are not really weapons (or tools) and only truly function as decoration.

A small and old example:
http://fc01.deviantart.net/fs71/i/2011/264/1/9/zombeh_preparedness_kit__melee_by_viroodiem-d4ahixe.jpg

But if the thing isn't made out of something soft, pliable or breakable like foam, cardboard, plastic, rubber, etc. and is in fact something very much solid, it potentially is very dangerous and must be treated with the respect that would be due. Does not matter if it is a "sword" and its more dull than one of Ben Stine's butter knives, while it might not be effective for "slashing" the fact that it is still solid and weighted means that it is still effective a "blunt" weapon. If Forensic television has taught us anything, it is that it really does not take a lot of force to become fatal blunt force trauma.

So if you are going to own such "replicas" it is in your best interest to trust those who you live with because if situations turn south like this one did, who knows how they might react and knowledge of something that could be utilized as a weapon is inviting it to BE utilized as a weapon if someone is emotional enough to desire using a weapon. Had it not been there, then something else would have been selected in its place, but the foreknowledge of it in this persons mind effectively saw it as an immediate solution to the question of what to use to channel that anger. Had it not been present the simple act of trying to figure out what to use might have given just enough pause to allow reason to creep in and stopped it before it ever happened.

More like "Cool Guy Channels Legend of Zelda to Defend Himself from Estranged Husband".

Don't have to make everything so gritty all the time.

wait, a replica master sword that doesnt fall apart under the slightest pressure or stress? they're usually pretty flimsy.

Combustion Kevin:
wait, a replica master sword that doesnt fall apart under the slightest pressure or stress? they're usually pretty flimsy.

A hell of a lot better than the Deku Sticks though.

I guess you could call that a Texas Master Sword Massacre.

FOR THE TRIFORCE AND HYRULE!

Seriously though, good show old bean!

Leemaster777:
Out of all this, I must ask: What kind of moron just WALKS into a freaking sword? There's dumb, and then there's REALLY dumb.

I don't care if it looks like a real sword or a fake sword, if someone is holding a piece of sharp-looking metal in my general direction, I'm going to take note of it.

"And then he ran into my knife. He ran into my knife ten times."

These things are never exactly as they are reported.

I just hope there were a lot of rupees in that flower pot.

MrMixelPixel:

StewShearer:

Now, obviously we don't want to make light of what was likely a scary situation, especially since Thompson's girlfriend's husband was in critical condition after the fight was broken up. That said, the assailant should probably consider himself lucky it was just the Master Sword. If it had been the Biggoron Sword he'd probably be dead.

Am I the only person who thinks this is like the best joke ever? There's a sneaking suspicion that this entire story was probably orchestrated by a higher power for that fucking joke to be stated.

Ah, but the Eyeball Frog went off before he could get to Death Mountain, so he was stuck with his regular Master Sword.

He probably should've equipped a Gibdo Mask and started making noises like Tingle. That would've scared the shit out of the other guy.

"He just walked right into the point of the sword, I don't know if he thought it was a toy."

Yea right. And those other stab wounds probably were accidents as well.

Anyway, my little brother has a replica master sword as well. Perhaps I should buy a suit of armor just to be safe.

According to this story, the girlfriend seems to have her estranged husband on speed dial to call in for whatever? Gee, that always ends well. -_-

Anyway, it's kinda funny, if someone got into my house and was a threat to me in someway, the story would go down literally the same way. "Guy uses Master Sword replica on intruder." XD

Considering no one got killed, I think this is a story we can have a good laugh with. Plus, a pot being involved makes it sound like it was more than a coincidence. Good thinking too, pots are usually stronger than the first sword in Zelda games, pretty clever.

StewShearer:
After the initial stabbing the husband left the house and Thompson locked the door. Unwilling to actually leave however the husband broke through the front door and the fight continued. According to police deputies the two brawled over the sword resulting in several more stab wounds for the assailant.

That's what the spin-attack is for, dude.

Evil Smurf:

Combustion Kevin:
wait, a replica master sword that doesnt fall apart under the slightest pressure or stress? they're usually pretty flimsy.

A hell of a lot better than the Deku Sticks though.

Hey, people have been killing each other with replica Deku Sticks for thousands of years.

Ftaghn To You Too:
The fact that he got hit with a flower pot is fucking perfect.

You go, guy. Seriously.

HA, oh man you made me actually, legitimately "Lol". I really shouldnt read these in class.

But this is a great story, that guy defiantly had the triforce of courage to stand up to that guy. But since his girlfriend invited her ex husband over, I cant say that she had the triforce of wisdom.

This girl must've been a real princess...

Yeah... I had another hilarious quip after that one, but I lost it. :( Maybe I'll come up with it again two weeks after the thread has been locked!

*grins* I imagined an annoyed Navi bounding around above their heads as they battled, shouting, "Hey! Listen!!!"

No one died? Cool, no one died. Jokes are now A-okay.

I can't help but wonder if the ex started hurling things at Thompson, prompting him to try to knock them back.

As someone who lives less than 30 miles from where this happened, I have to say, this is a lot more entertaining then the standard "home invader shot by armed homeowner" or "robbery foiled by handgun wielding customer/employee/owner" we hear constantly. You'd think people around here would just learn that it's a bad fucking idea to be a criminal in this state. Now we have people using fantasy swords on intruders whilst dodging flowerpots.

This better be damn well followed up by a story about a Houston area single mother defending her child and puppy from home invaders using a hadouken!

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