All-New TMNT Gets All-New Ninja Rap

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All-New TMNT Gets All-New Ninja Rap

Is it a no ninja no ninja no?

For good or ill, one of the most memorable contributions to popular culture spinning out of the live-action Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movies was "Ninja Rap," a track by (then) momentarily-hot hip-hop artist Vanilla Ice that appeared on the soundtrack to TMNT II: The Secret of The Ooze.

As it turns out, this tradition will continue into the 21st Century. The soundtrack (from Atlantic Records) to the new Michael Bay-produced TMNT reboot from director Jonathan Liebesman prominently features "Shell Shocked," an all-new TMNT-themed track by Juicy J, Wiz Khalifa & Ty Dolla $ign (featuring Kill Tha Noise & Madsonik.)

Sample lyrics:
"All my brothers try'na get some cheddah
We all want our cut like the Shredder
Me and my bros
Come together for the dough
Bought the orange Lamborghini
Call it Michelangelo"

The original "Ninja Rap" (recently revived, along with Ice himself, for a Kraft Macaroni & Cheese commercial,) was notable among movie tie-in hip-hop tracks of the 1990s (see also MC Hammer's "Addams [Family] Groove") for the song and it's performer actually being part of the story and continuity of the film itself: During the climactic battle between the Turtles and Foot Clan, the fighting spills over into a dockside nightclub where Vanilla Ice is performing. Rather than flee the scene, Ice, (real name: Robert Matthew Van Winkle,) somehow intuiting that the creatures before him are in fact both ninjas and the good guys, courageously(?) remains onstage and seemingly improvises a song in their honor on the spot; allowing the Turtles the extra time needed to neutralize evil mutants Tokka and Rahzar with retromutagen, doubtlessly saving the lives of dozens of innocent club attendees - if not the entirety of New York City.

Source: Atlantic Records

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Oh for the love of cock-goblins, come the fuck on! The original was cheesy but fun... now its just one more reason why I probably won't enjoy this movie.

CAPTCHA: worth overdoing

No, no Captcha it definitely is not.

I... think I'll stick with "Go ninja go ninja go!"

YEESH...

Never thought there'd come a day when I pick the Vanilla Ice version of ANYTHING over 'legitimate' rappers.

unbeliever64:
I... think I'll stick with "Go ninja go ninja go!"

YEESH...

Likewise, I'm sticking with "Go ninja go ninja go!" as well. By the Emperor that's just awful....

Those lyrics make me think of this:

Also, the names of those artists are just a WTF moment within themselves.

Burnouts3s3:
Never thought there'd come a day when I pick the Vanilla Ice version of ANYTHING over 'legitimate' rappers.

'Legitimate' is kind of subject to change. The rappers they got to do each TMNT Rap were definitely products of their time. It's just that early 90s hip hop was more conducive to cheesy, upbeat stuff (this was also the era where MC Hammer and Biz Markie had big hits) that fit in well with the Ninja Turtles. Current mainstream hip hop, by contrast, is generally characterized by it's dark beats, lyrics bragging about having sex, money, and drugs, and trying your absolute hardest to be Lil Wayne (or any other big name from Young Money).

Vanilla Ice sucked, but Wiz Khalifa sucks just as much. Juicy J sucks a bit less, at least on this song. I've never even heard of the third guy, but he sounds unbelievably generic. In fact, this song in general sounds really generic. It's listenable if nothing else. I've certainly heard much worse, less catchy rap songs in the past year that had some truly awful, abysmal lyrics. As a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles theme, though? It's a little too loud and the beat sounds a bit too dark for the source material, but I guess I can see it kind of fitting. It could be much, much, MUCH worse. Like the last time a Micheal Bay produced movie based on a popular cartoon and toyline had a tie-in rap song.

I was honestly expecting it to be dubstep 'music'.

Mark this day, for today we witnessed the birth of the Giga Palm. It is for when your failure is so epic, the entire world smacks their foreheads in unison.

VoidWanderer:
I was honestly expecting it to be dubstep 'music'.

How hilariously witty. You put the word music in little quote marks, signifying that it isn't really music. How wonderfully original an observation. When are you performing a comedy arena tour, I'd really like a ticket.

Oh god, this is just another case of marketing going get some guys to do that rap-hop thing all the kids are into!

With these assholes is easy to see why no one on the outside respects the genre. For once I wish there were good rappers handling these projects, Lupe Fiasco, Ab-Soul, hell, Hopsin if he could tone it down for something marketable.

There isn't a facepalm imagemacro powerful enough to represent my reaction to this

Here's an idea. When writing a song themed around the Ninja Turtles, make it about how badass the Turtles are not about yourself being gangsta. You putz. Dear god, you just got schooled by Vanilla Ice! Oh my god, it's worse, you're actually trying to build off Vanilla Ice's fame to boost your own. You sad sad fool.

ITT: We reminisce the good old days back when rap music was good. But yeah, this song is nothing special.

razer17:

VoidWanderer:
I was honestly expecting it to be dubstep 'music'.

How hilariously witty. You put the word music in little quote marks, signifying that it isn't really music. How wonderfully original an observation. When are you performing a comedy arena tour, I'd really like a ticket.

It's not worth the salt brah.

Bailos:
Oh god, this is just another case of marketing going get some guys to do that rap-hop thing all the kids are into!

With these assholes is easy to see why no one on the outside respects the genre. For once I wish there were good rappers handling these projects, Lupe Fiasco, Ab-Soul, hell, Hopsin if he could tone it down for something marketable.

I used to be neutral about rap. Then all my rock stations got replaced by them with the announcement as to why being "everyone hates rock music". All that's left is indie hipster crap that tries to replicate Radiohead. That's why I'm npot keen on it.

Shamanic Rhythm:
Those lyrics make me think of this:
(HURDY HUURRR RAP! video)
.

...seriously though that jokes getting old...

Bailos:

With these assholes is easy to see why no one on the outside respects the genre. For once I wish there were good rappers handling these projects, Lupe Fiasco, Ab-Soul, hell, Hopsin if he could tone it down for something marketable.

you know I used to be like "the only GOOD rap is "socially consious rap"

then I realised I was looking at the genre far to narrowly, my point is why try and appeal to people whos opinion shouldnt matter in the first place? and now I cringe whenever I listen to Sage Francis

this track is ok....

Nouw:
ITT: We reminisce the good old days back when rap music was good. .

Vanilla Ice...."good"........Vanilla Ice..."good" XD

Vault101:
Vanilla Ice...."good"........Vanilla Ice..."good" XD

I don't really get Vanilla Ice. Beastie Boys got me into hiphop and Macklemore can be pretty good but Vanilla Ice just feels soulless, especially his hit 'Ice Ice Baby.'

Nouw:
I don't really get Vanilla Ice.

NOBODY gets Vanilla Ice...he was an anomaly

Beastie Boys got me into hiphop and Macklemore can be pretty good but Vanilla Ice just feels soulless, especially his hit 'Ice Ice Baby.'

I hsd only ever vaugly heard of the beastie boys...I assumed for some reason being white and having a "boy band" sounding name they were just that and not actually respected in the rap genre...which they are aparently

Macklemore is ok...he comes across as cheesy somtimes though

It's an impressive feat to get all of the people to like a Vanilla Ice song over yours, but these guys managed to pull it off.

Wiz Khalifa? Really?

Do the turtles smoke weed in the movie? Because that's the only reason I can see for having that ridiculously talentless "rapper" on the OST.

So basically, the newest reiteration of the turtles is going to suck at every level. Gotcha.

Vault101:

Nouw:
Beastie Boys got me into hiphop and Macklemore can be pretty good but Vanilla Ice just feels soulless, especially his hit 'Ice Ice Baby.'

I hsd only ever vaugly heard of the beastie boys...I assumed for some reason being white and having a "boy band" sounding name they were just that and not actually respected in the rap genre...which they are aparently

Macklemore is ok...he comes across as cheesy somtimes though

Funny you say that because the Beastie Boys were perceived like that until Licensed to Ill dropped and they made hip hop history. They were the group which changed the perception people had of white people in hiphop so yeah, kind of a big deal (;

I'm still a bit annoyed he robbed Kendrick at the Grammys but meh, Same Love woooo!! amirite.

The rap is a bit mediocre, but I guess that's expected from commissioned lyrics. That being said, I love the beat. It's got Kill The Noise written all over it! Can we get an instrumental :)?

Oh my glob, this is FUCKING hilarious!

This makes the rap in the 2012 TMNT series look like a glob damn masterpiece of unimagined proportions...

Also, I kinda want the instrumental version just so that I could try to make a "better" version myself...

Was listening to R.E.M when I had the misfortune of stumbling upon this post. Now there is some hip-hop/rap I can appreciate, like this for example:

But this...it really makes me feel sick listening to it. Like a lot of pop coming out these days.

Any hype that I had building for TMNT has just gone. How hard is it to get anyone with passion for the franchise to make music for it? This was just monotonous droning.

Do you mind? I'm busy preparing popcorn for the spectacular Bay-splosion-filled train wreck that's going to come from this flick.

Wiz-bloody-Khalifa.

I'd rather listen to Vanilla Ice's rap, at least i'll be entertained.

You know, I actually like the rap intro of the new show. Partly because it pays homage to the original cartoon intro.

But this? Nope. It's so generic and boring. The Vanilla Ice song was at least cheesy fun. Even the movie knew that much.

Seems to fit the style of what the movie is probably going to go for. So it did that job well. Still personally prefer this Shell Shock(ed) rap more though:

Lot more energetic to go with how the movie is.

I think making a Turtle Tribute is great. Yes it was cheesy the first time (it was 90s rap for goodness sake) but that's what the turtles have always been about. For once Michael Bay is actually trying to acknowledge old fans of a property, which is great.

However... just comparing these new lyrics with the original Partners in Kryme lyrics, eegggghhh. Rappers today don't make any sense.

It isn't bad, i kind of like it.

Lyrics remind me of the most recent Epic Rap Battle tho.

Burnouts3s3:
Never thought there'd come a day when I pick the Vanilla Ice version of ANYTHING over 'legitimate' rappers.

Hehe. Hehehehehehe. Yeah. That IS pretty surreal ^^

MovieBob:

Sample lyrics:
"All my brothers try'na get some cheddah
We all want our cut like the Shredder
Me and my bros
Come together for the dough
Bought the orange Lamborghini
Call it Michelangelo"

I haven't listened to the song but these sample lyrics.... The turtles are in it for the money & deserve just as much as shredder who they now work for. Then they bask is said wealth while driving expensive cars.

wait....

This person isn't honestly singing about a bunch of brothers who live in the sewers. Who have to keep themselves hidden from people that might fear them or use them for money.

No....

This person is clearly singing about Justin Bieber & trying to apply that to these turtles.

My expectations for this film were already low.. and I mean low but now It's like someone just wheeled in a backhoe

The biggest problem with the whole thing is that it sounds serious, like this would somehow garner respect. I can't say for sure that the other 90's film soundtracks didn't also see their dopey songs as "legit," but they at least were of an era that was full of enough ridiculous stuff that they can be enjoyed as cheesy and fun. For now, this is just embarrassing - the only way it would "work" is if it were originally meant to go to Weird Al Yankovic.

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