The controls, characters, and final missions in Killzone 2.
Controls were awful IMO, characters were all assholes that I hoped would die (and the only characters I actually DID like died), and the final mission was a giant grindfest with an achievement for beating the boss in under 20 minutes.
I know that this is a hyperbole, and you do make some pretty good points (although obviously the "problems" exist so the game can actually be fun), but you're wrong on a couple places. The arms are held by their sides, the hunter claws at the chest, and trix are for kids.
I swear if you meant this stuff I'd have to hit you. Disliking a game because it contains elements that give it gameplay is just wrong (things like the enemies moving fast). That doesn't stop other people from saying these things but actually meaning them.
Incidentally, their called The Horde, not zombies. Zombies is just more well known, so people say it. In Zombieland, there not zombies, but they still call them that.
I can't think of any hyperboles at the moment. I say them a lot though, when I'm mad at a game.
You good sir are what I like to call a retard (Directed at thread creator.) Your argument is that Zombies, fictional things. In a game, a fictional thing. Don't act like zombies in real life. How the hell would you know how a zombie would work. Also your arguments about the people make you just sound stupid. Why would any game ever put in something about "Aunt Flo" and why would you care. You are dumb and reading your thread made me want to go out of my way to make you feel bad and just stop doing what you do.
Cliff_m85: ...weapons that NEVER JAM and always have a gigantic pile of infinite ammunitation scattered around.
I don't think that Valve were being realistic with this game. Also, it's a game, it doesn't have to make sense.
But, I will join you on the Left 4 Dead hate. My god the AI and the fucking witch. Seriously, I hate playing online because there aren't many 'noob servers', and when I find one I can't fucking connect. So I have to play single-player. ARGH! THE AMOUNT OF FUCKING TIMES I'VE BEEN LEFT TO DIE BY THOSE STUPID FUCKWITS!!! I was downed by the horde at the end of No Mercy right next to the helicopter, and they just fucking stood there!! On Crash Course, I went to kill a witch, got chased, downed, killed, and they didn't fucking move! Whenever progressing, I'm leading the pack whilst everyone else trails 10 yards behind, so I always get the hit first. The AI is seriously the worst friendly AI I have ever seen in a game. And on that note...
The fucking witch. WHINY BITCH FACE! I had no idea how to kill them, so I asked my friend over MSN who'd played it some time before me. He explained that I had to use the auto-shotgun. WELL EXCUUUUUSE ME VALVE, but I think that only having one special weapon is a kick in the balls! I use the assault rifle, as I can hammer on the trigger and take down horde crowds easily, and I enjoy getting long range headshots with it. But the fact that I have to use a weapon that I don't really want to use, I don't think that's fair. He said that I should wait for the survivor that has the auto-shotgun. Well I bring back my previous point, the AI that seems to have taken too many bites to the brain. If I didn't go and find the witch myself, they'd just stand there picking their noses and trying to lick the inside of their gun barrels clean.
Not worth the money I bought it for.
your supposed to SNEAK PASSED the witch. the intro told you don't startle the witch.
I just got this game used, and i'm having a hell of a time. I decided to be a sniper class, thinking it would be fun. Well that was a mistake. Turns out that you better damn well be a soldier if you don't want to die an absurd amount of time. Seriously, i'm killing this weird mind control plant, and none of the enemies ever give you medigel. Basically, you can't get hit at all, or your screwed. Not to mention this random clone appears at each node that can knock you down, paralyze you, and then sap away only your health. Your shield disappear frickin instantly, and then you get mobbed by these vomiting plant zombies that also only do health damage. I have to basically hide behind my allies. Which brings me to my next complaint, allied AI. You have to tell them to do fucking ANYTHING! Either they follow you mindlessly and refuse to run away from zombies that just stand next to them and vomit. They die way too easily, and don't use their abilities on their own. ENEMIES can use their abilities on their own, why the hell can't my goddamn allies!?!?!?!? No, they just stand there and die, leaving me open, oh and by the way, my sniper can only shoot twice before overheating. Not to mention you can't zoom in when you have low health. The wiggle when you zoom in is impossible to deal with, even at point blank. It's as if your character has goddamn Parkinson's or something.
Seriously, why don't they just tell you to be a soldier, why offer other classes at all.
Also, the biotic powers (I think) are super cheap. Seriously, being able to paralyze me and sap my health with an undodgeable attack is cheap, no debate necessary.
Finally, why is the game so goddamn vague. They don't tell you how to do fucking ANYTHING! Why can't they tell you how do do things.
Ok, this is finally the end of my rant. I have a terrible feeling I'm going about this game all wrong, but i'll be damned if the game will show me a better option.
In Test Drive Unlimited (a great game, it's what NFS should have evolved into. It's just about the cars, and racing them. Nothing else) I notice that a lot of work went into creating the island, and it's quite pretty. Problem is you can either go flat out, or not at all so you can't just sit back and cruise and take in the scenery. You're usually going too fast to notice. I want to be able to drive at the speed limit without looking like a learner driver.
On TDU again, there was one bug that teetered on the edge of game breaking. One so infuriating that it cost me several time trials, yet doesn't happen with enough frequency to make me rage quit.
Invisible cop cars.
Cops don't tag you for speeding, but they get you for property damage. You can usually hit a few cars before a call goes out, but so much as touch a coppers bumper and they're after you. So you're doing 200 KPH down the highway, not a car in sight. Then BAM! you smack into a fat wall of nothing that starts wailing sirens at you. It's just so frustrating, especially in a time trial. Not only do you have to watch the clock, now you have dodge cops long enough for the hunt to be called off, and be extra careful no to hit anything because that just escalates the situation. On the bright side, since you technically hit nothing, they can't fine you for it.
More Fun To Compute: Rez HD The first and most obvious problem with the game is that it really short. A reasonable player will be able to clear all of the areas in under 2 hours which is totally unacceptable in today's economic environment. 3/10
What's your highest score on pacifism?
/..../ Mass Effect.... I can beat this game with a rifle and consistent use of my allies as decoys until I get to the end where the boss always targets me. Why? None of the powers are of any use since I can use one gun to kill everything in this game. Other than the bosses and the giant worm thing everything else dies with one head shot. Why the hell does the space-jeep react the same way in space as it does on a planet with gravity? I fully expected to hit the jump jets and float across that caravan, not plummet to the bottom.
Mass Effect's areas were too empty! The worlds, the Citadel, nothing ever felt large or really occupied. Also the lock picking mini-game? I mean, c'mon fellas.
"Sandtraps" is dull and overly long. Ravenholm is frustrating (with Headcrab closets and obnoxious running zombies) and boring visuals. The fun physics objects aren't nearly as practical to use as killing instruments as they should be, leaving me FORCED to choose between a crap pistol that does no damage, an SMG with terrible accuracy, and a crowbar. Yeah, that's right, those are the only 4 weapons in the ENTIRE game. As if you needed more proof that Valve are complete tossers.
Another complaint I have is the graphics. Half-Life 2 looks decent at best. Nothing like Bioshock, which looks much better. In the audio department, the Combine are kind of interesting to listen to, but Headcrabs sound like retarded parakeets and the NPC speak is always some form of "have a med-kit" or "Excuse me, sir."
In fact, I dock HL2 1,000 points for the simple reason that NPC allies can't stop trying to hump me. Seriously, it's like they all had their brains taken out and replaced with Cocker Spaniel ones. No, Mr. Soldier, I did NOT tell you to "heel."
Half-Life 2's terrible graphics (not at all like Assassin's Creed), mediocre sound (my word does Vance's VA suck) and terrible gameplay (You know, at least Super Mario Bros had a useful pistol) combine to create an unplayable mess which I wouldn't recommend to anyone. I award it a 1/10 and urge you all to not buy it. Play Duck Hunt instead.
Samurai Goomba: Half-Life 2 is horrible. You hear me? It sucks!
"Sandtraps" is dull and overly long. Ravenholm is frustrating (with Headcrab closets and obnoxious running zombies) and boring visuals. The fun physics objects aren't nearly as practical to use as killing instruments as they should be, leaving me FORCED to choose between a crap pistol that does no damage, an SMG with terrible accuracy, and a crowbar. Yeah, that's right, those are the only 4 weapons in the ENTIRE game. As if you needed more proof that Valve are complete tossers.
Another complaint I have is the graphics. Half-Life 2 looks decent at best. Nothing like Bioshock, which looks much better. In the audio department, the Combine are kind of interesting to listen to, but Headcrabs sound like retarded parakeets and the NPC speak is always some form of "have a med-kit" or "Excuse me, sir."
In fact, I dock HL2 1,000 points for the simple reason that NPC allies can't stop trying to hump me. Seriously, it's like they all had their brains taken out and replaced with Cocker Spaniel ones. No, Mr. Soldier, I did NOT tell you to "heel."
Half-Life 2's terrible graphics (not at all like Assassin's Creed), mediocre sound (my word does Vance's VA suck) and terrible gameplay (You know, at least Super Mario Bros had a useful pistol) combine to create an unplayable mess which I wouldn't recommend to anyone. I award it a 1/10 and urge you all to not buy it. Play Duck Hunt instead.
While I also have a passionate hate for Hl2, I'm going to have to brand you a retarded for the simple fact that you expect a game made in 2004 to look like a game in 2007.
mounky: You good sir are what I like to call a retard (Directed at thread creator.) Your argument is that Zombies, fictional things. In a game, a fictional thing. Don't act like zombies in real life. How the hell would you know how a zombie would work. Also your arguments about the people make you just sound stupid. Why would any game ever put in something about "Aunt Flo" and why would you care. You are dumb and reading your thread made me want to go out of my way to make you feel bad and just stop doing what you do.
You are also a retard, because you cant read the thread title. Fable, great game and all but what game calls itself an RPG when you restriced to paths (I'm not kidding, you can only go on the beaten path) and small Areas? Its an Action Adventure with RPG elements.
Cliff_m85: So this thread is basically for you people to make your complaints known. Hyperbole is perfectly fine as you'll see with my review, but just let flow your own or perhaps even your first review. Mine is.....
"LEFT 4 DEAD"
Not very often does there come a zombie apocolypse game that truly startles and envigorates a community of gamers, Left 4 Dead is not one of those games. While Valve promised a zombie game, they developed another 'infection' storyline with super-fast running infected. Sorry Valve, but zombies stumble towards you slowly. They don't barrel at you. Not only that but Valve actually have the balls to call you stupid to your face.
You start the game as four individuals that are obviously immune from the 'infected' put in a room where you can choose one of three weapons that NEVER JAM and always have a gigantic pile of infinite ammunitation scattered around. Yeah, that makes sense in the zombie apocolypse (or 'infected apocolypse). Any group would just abandon a ton of ammo during that time. *rolls eyes*
You play as either the old war vet who is just as fast as the youngsters and keeps up with them as well, or the black guy who was included so Valve wouldn't be called racist, or the biker guy who hates almost everything in the game, or the attractive woman who is not much more. This was a brilliant chance for Valve to be daring and incorporating a challenge timed to the calendar setting on our Xbox's and computers. We all know that zombies/infected have a terrific sense of smell, so Valve could've made it that difficulty was based on what time of the month it was. But no, just like every other female character there must me no mention of 'Aunt Flo'.
Now for the special infected that ruin the game. The tank is actually a reasonable monster who is basically a overpowered smashing device. However shots to the face don't really register as well to this beast so that a full shotgun clip can fill it and it'll still be moving. Next would be the monster that has Valve laughing at how stupid you are. Yes, you. Because you thought of this and didn't say anything but I WILL. The Boomer is a retarded mass of crap. They actually warn you not to get hit with his bile because it attracts 'the horde', so you must push him away and shoot him. What happens when you shoot him? He explodes, which logically would send bile around the area no matter what as well as ooze near his dead corpse. But nope, you're perfectly safe after you blow him up. Sorry Valve, I guess you just expect us to understand that gas explosions would still allow for liquid to exist. The smoker is next, with a tongue that for some reason regenerates yet when shot to death cannot regenerate itself. Add that the tongue when wrapped around a survivor doesn't hold their arms forcably to their sides, which allows for the survivor to easily get away from the beast...yet they just squirm and die slowly. Followed lastly by the hunter, who can jump terrific distances even though it'd be impossible for our bodies in any condition to do such. Not to mention that the hunter won't even do the logical thing of ripping the eyes out of the survivor when it leaps upon them. No, it would rather just slightly claw at the shoulders instead.
So "Left 4 Dead", a game that was supposed to allow the many players around the world (except in Australia) to feel the reality of a zombie apocolypse falls flat to the rational people of the world who would actually like to know how we would stand up against the zombies. Valve, I understood you tried so I'm willing to give you a score of
3/10
TROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOLL (trying and failing to channel Yahtzee).
Cliff_m85: So this thread is basically for you people to make your complaints known. Hyperbole is perfectly fine as you'll see with my review, but just let flow your own or perhaps even your first review. Mine is.....
"LEFT 4 DEAD"
Not very often does there come a zombie apocolypse game that truly startles and envigorates a community of gamers, Left 4 Dead is not one of those games. While Valve promised a zombie game, they developed another 'infection' storyline with super-fast running infected. Sorry Valve, but zombies stumble towards you slowly. They don't barrel at you. Not only that but Valve actually have the balls to call you stupid to your face.
You start the game as four individuals that are obviously immune from the 'infected' put in a room where you can choose one of three weapons that NEVER JAM and always have a gigantic pile of infinite ammunitation scattered around. Yeah, that makes sense in the zombie apocolypse (or 'infected apocolypse). Any group would just abandon a ton of ammo during that time. *rolls eyes*
You play as either the old war vet who is just as fast as the youngsters and keeps up with them as well, or the black guy who was included so Valve wouldn't be called racist, or the biker guy who hates almost everything in the game, or the attractive woman who is not much more. This was a brilliant chance for Valve to be daring and incorporating a challenge timed to the calendar setting on our Xbox's and computers. We all know that zombies/infected have a terrific sense of smell, so Valve could've made it that difficulty was based on what time of the month it was. But no, just like every other female character there must me no mention of 'Aunt Flo'.
Now for the special infected that ruin the game. The tank is actually a reasonable monster who is basically a overpowered smashing device. However shots to the face don't really register as well to this beast so that a full shotgun clip can fill it and it'll still be moving. Next would be the monster that has Valve laughing at how stupid you are. Yes, you. Because you thought of this and didn't say anything but I WILL. The Boomer is a retarded mass of crap. They actually warn you not to get hit with his bile because it attracts 'the horde', so you must push him away and shoot him. What happens when you shoot him? He explodes, which logically would send bile around the area no matter what as well as ooze near his dead corpse. But nope, you're perfectly safe after you blow him up. Sorry Valve, I guess you just expect us to understand that gas explosions would still allow for liquid to exist. The smoker is next, with a tongue that for some reason regenerates yet when shot to death cannot regenerate itself. Add that the tongue when wrapped around a survivor doesn't hold their arms forcably to their sides, which allows for the survivor to easily get away from the beast...yet they just squirm and die slowly. Followed lastly by the hunter, who can jump terrific distances even though it'd be impossible for our bodies in any condition to do such. Not to mention that the hunter won't even do the logical thing of ripping the eyes out of the survivor when it leaps upon them. No, it would rather just slightly claw at the shoulders instead.
So "Left 4 Dead", a game that was supposed to allow the many players around the world (except in Australia) to feel the reality of a zombie apocolypse falls flat to the rational people of the world who would actually like to know how we would stand up against the zombies. Valve, I understood you tried so I'm willing to give you a score of
3/10
TROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOLL (trying and failing to channel Yahtzee).
Can THAT many people on this site not know how to fucking read a thread title? You are the Troll here, you fucking twat.
Samurai Goomba: Half-Life 2 is horrible. You hear me? It sucks!
"Sandtraps" is dull and overly long. Ravenholm is frustrating (with Headcrab closets and obnoxious running zombies) and boring visuals. The fun physics objects aren't nearly as practical to use as killing instruments as they should be, leaving me FORCED to choose between a crap pistol that does no damage, an SMG with terrible accuracy, and a crowbar. Yeah, that's right, those are the only 4 weapons in the ENTIRE game. As if you needed more proof that Valve are complete tossers.
Another complaint I have is the graphics. Half-Life 2 looks decent at best. Nothing like Bioshock, which looks much better. In the audio department, the Combine are kind of interesting to listen to, but Headcrabs sound like retarded parakeets and the NPC speak is always some form of "have a med-kit" or "Excuse me, sir."
In fact, I dock HL2 1,000 points for the simple reason that NPC allies can't stop trying to hump me. Seriously, it's like they all had their brains taken out and replaced with Cocker Spaniel ones. No, Mr. Soldier, I did NOT tell you to "heel."
Half-Life 2's terrible graphics (not at all like Assassin's Creed), mediocre sound (my word does Vance's VA suck) and terrible gameplay (You know, at least Super Mario Bros had a useful pistol) combine to create an unplayable mess which I wouldn't recommend to anyone. I award it a 1/10 and urge you all to not buy it. Play Duck Hunt instead.
While I also have a passionate hate for Hl2, I'm going to have to brand you a retarded for the simple fact that you expect a game made in 2004 to look like a game in 2007.
Have a fail cookie. Made of 100%, all-natural fail. Part of this balanced fail diet.
He said hyperbole was fine. And anyways, you should know not to believe everything you read. Or even believe that the people who wrote it believed it. Especially in a topic about over-exaggerating little flaws.
Cliff_m85: So this thread is basically for you people to make your complaints known. Hyperbole is perfectly fine as you'll see with my review, but just let flow your own or perhaps even your first review. Mine is.....
"LEFT 4 DEAD"
Not very often does there come a zombie apocolypse game that truly startles and envigorates a community of gamers, Left 4 Dead is not one of those games. While Valve promised a zombie game, they developed another 'infection' storyline with super-fast running infected. Sorry Valve, but zombies stumble towards you slowly. They don't barrel at you. Not only that but Valve actually have the balls to call you stupid to your face.
You start the game as four individuals that are obviously immune from the 'infected' put in a room where you can choose one of three weapons that NEVER JAM and always have a gigantic pile of infinite ammunitation scattered around. Yeah, that makes sense in the zombie apocolypse (or 'infected apocolypse). Any group would just abandon a ton of ammo during that time. *rolls eyes*
You play as either the old war vet who is just as fast as the youngsters and keeps up with them as well, or the black guy who was included so Valve wouldn't be called racist, or the biker guy who hates almost everything in the game, or the attractive woman who is not much more. This was a brilliant chance for Valve to be daring and incorporating a challenge timed to the calendar setting on our Xbox's and computers. We all know that zombies/infected have a terrific sense of smell, so Valve could've made it that difficulty was based on what time of the month it was. But no, just like every other female character there must me no mention of 'Aunt Flo'.
Now for the special infected that ruin the game. The tank is actually a reasonable monster who is basically a overpowered smashing device. However shots to the face don't really register as well to this beast so that a full shotgun clip can fill it and it'll still be moving. Next would be the monster that has Valve laughing at how stupid you are. Yes, you. Because you thought of this and didn't say anything but I WILL. The Boomer is a retarded mass of crap. They actually warn you not to get hit with his bile because it attracts 'the horde', so you must push him away and shoot him. What happens when you shoot him? He explodes, which logically would send bile around the area no matter what as well as ooze near his dead corpse. But nope, you're perfectly safe after you blow him up. Sorry Valve, I guess you just expect us to understand that gas explosions would still allow for liquid to exist. The smoker is next, with a tongue that for some reason regenerates yet when shot to death cannot regenerate itself. Add that the tongue when wrapped around a survivor doesn't hold their arms forcably to their sides, which allows for the survivor to easily get away from the beast...yet they just squirm and die slowly. Followed lastly by the hunter, who can jump terrific distances even though it'd be impossible for our bodies in any condition to do such. Not to mention that the hunter won't even do the logical thing of ripping the eyes out of the survivor when it leaps upon them. No, it would rather just slightly claw at the shoulders instead.
So "Left 4 Dead", a game that was supposed to allow the many players around the world (except in Australia) to feel the reality of a zombie apocolypse falls flat to the rational people of the world who would actually like to know how we would stand up against the zombies. Valve, I understood you tried so I'm willing to give you a score of
3/10
TROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOLL (trying and failing to channel Yahtzee).
Can THAT many people on this site not know how to fucking read a thread title? You are the Troll here, you fucking twat.
Have a fail cookie. Made of 100%, all-natural fail. Part of this balanced fail diet.
Also, you'll most likely get banned for that flame. Hilarious...
Curtmiester: I think the idea of zombies has been changed so many times that they can almost anything. So saying they HAVE to stumble is reduntant.
May I make one about a zombie who has been undead for 100+ years and rather than eat humans he eats animals. He could also be in love with a teenager and sparkle out in the sunlight. ;)
Yeah sure go for it, I have a hunch that you will make a lot of money and will have a massive fan-base. But there's a couple catches: Everyone not in the fanbase will hate you with a passion that burns like a raging fire. You have to hand in all dignity before you start.
Persona 4 about gave me an anuerysm. For the uninformed, at one point in the game your detective uncle takes you down to the station and won't believe your claims about "some world beyond the tv"......now if only you could demonstrate by say....sticking your hand in the tv in the interragation room........But no we just sit there and argue while the token adorable little girl gets kidnapped. Made more frustrating by the fact that at the very beginning of the game the same thing happens with your friends except you have enough brains to show them.
This can't be a serious review. I'll agree that l4d was overrated but it wasn't that overrated. You're really not supposed to be looking for realism in a B zombie mob game.
To you I would say this is the French's way of getting back at the Americans but we will end up derailing this thread *cough*
In Age Of The Empires, why does it only talk food and wood to make a solider? This makes it gay gay gay gay gay gaaaaaaay
I'd like to see you get a woman pregnant without any wood. Okay, that was bad, I know.
Anyway, you know what game I hate? That's right: GTA IV
Seriously, a hamburger costs 1$, but a hot dog 5$! Ridiculous! And there's practically no motorcycles ANYWHERE. I want more goddamn motorcycles. Somebody should make a GTM: Grand Theft Motorcycle. You're a gangster in a parody of a modern metropolis, and steal shitloads of motorcycles. How awesome would that be!? Balls to the wall, precisely.
Also, you can't carry unlimited amounts of ammo anymore! What is up with that? I've got to go back and buy some more like every 50 missions, just cause there's an ammo limit. Totally unnecessary. And why do we have to play a man. I want to play a leather clad chick with a whip.
So, in summary, what GTA IV, SHOULD have been: A game about HOT LEATHER CLAD CHICK, who goes around with an UNLIMITED NUMBER OF WHIPS and STEALS MOTORCYCLES and the price of hamburgers and hot dogs is sensibly PROPORTIONATE. You let me down Rockstar, you really did.
This is an obvious joke post. A troll if you will without malicious intent. Shame on people taking this seriously. God help us if it was a serious post.
To you I would say this is the French's way of getting back at the Americans but we will end up derailing this thread *cough*
In Age Of The Empires, why does it only talk food and wood to make a solider? This makes it gay gay gay gay gay gaaaaaaay
I'd like to see you get a woman pregnant without any wood. Okay, that was bad, I know.
Anyway, you know what game I hate? That's right: GTA IV
Seriously, a hamburger costs 1$, but a hot dog 5$! Ridiculous! And there's practically no motorcycles ANYWHERE. I want more goddamn motorcycles. Somebody should make a GTM: Grand Theft Motorcycle. You're a gangster in a parody of a modern metropolis, and steal shitloads of motorcycles. How awesome would that be!? Balls to the wall, precisely.
Also, you can't carry unlimited amounts of ammo anymore! What is up with that? I've got to go back and buy some more like every 50 missions, just cause there's an ammo limit. Totally unnecessary. And why do we have to play a man. I want to play a leather clad chick with a whip.
So, in summary, what GTA IV, SHOULD have been: A game about HOT LEATHER CLAD CHICK, who goes around with an UNLIMITED NUMBER OF WHIPS and STEALS MOTORCYCLES and the price of hamburgers and hot dogs is sensibly PROPORTIONATE. You let me down Rockstar, you really did.
So... GTA: Lost and Damned? ;) Although that too sadly lacked whips! And the hamburgers where still overpriced.
Man, I could go on about Dead Rising for a bit, but it may take too long. I really hope the next one is better. I really wanted to like that game.