Chapter 34: From the journal of Stinthad Kekimtobul
25th Granite, 1053, Early Spring
Okay, so apparently we've got some new migrants.
A lot of them.
Like, 16. Well, I guess you can never have to many masons.
1st Slate, 1053, Mid-Spring
Every day this place just gets increasingly odd. I was trying to figure out a way to get Lorbam to stop partying (yes, he really did organize a party, I didn't imagine that), when one of the woodcarpetners approached me from behind.
Zontherleth: "Um, excuse me. You're Stinthad Kekimtobul, right? The expedition leader?"
Stinthad: "Huh? Oh yeah, that's me. Normally I'd be eager to chat, but I'm actually kind of busy right now trying to deal with Lorbam."
Stinthad: "The earth golem shuffling back and forth near the entrance. I think he's trying to dance."
Zontherleth: "Oh yeah! Some of the other dwarves are just watching that thing now, but not us woodcarpenters! We're always working, no matter what and-"
Stinthad: "Look, do you need something?"
Zontherleth: "Well, yes. You see, we woodcarpenters are a hard working bunch. Our job is generally a thankless task, due to most dwarves preference of stone over wood, but we don't let that discourage us. But we feel that our dedication to Reveredtour is not properly appreciated at the moment. To be honest, our working conditions are less than satisfactory."
Stinthad: "Poor working conditions? What are you talking abou- OH GOD WHAT'S THAT THING ON YOUR LEG?!?!"
Zontherleth: "Yeah, that's one of the problems."
Stinthad: "It's trying to tear off your leg!"
Zontherleth: "Yeah, well it's not very good at it. These things keep jumping on us when we go to get logs from the caverns. They're really annoying."
Stinthad: "It's going to kill you!"
Zontherleth: "It's barely larger than a cat."
At this point the tiny abomination, frustrated with it's repeated failure to harm Zontherleth, began clawing at her back instead. This was met with even less success, as she merely kicked it across the room into a wall. Somehow this didn't even phase the little devil, as it went right back to trying to eat her.
Stinthad: "So, it really doesn't bother you?"
Zontherleth: "No, it does. It's hard to work with anything stomping on your feet, no matter how small. We tried killing them ourselves, but we can't seem to hurt them. Can you send someone with real weapons to deal with them?"
Stinthad: "Er, sure. I'll just call the Immortal Rags and those things will be out of your hair soon enough."
Satisfied with my answer, Zontherleth turned to leave. The little zombie followed her, attempting to cling to her body. She kicked it again, which still didn't seem to do any harm. I guess civilians lack the proper skills to punch zombies out of existence like Alath, no matter how small they may be.
Where the heck are the Immortal Rags anyways?
Oh god I forgot that they were still locked in there.
4th Slate, 1053, Mid-Spring
So I let the Immortal Rags out of the swimming room, and told them they needed to go kill some monsters down in the caverns. Despite being locked in there for a bit longer than I originally planned, they didn't seem to upset.
This didn't end well for the little zombies, who were hopelessly weak compared to even civilians. Let alone a group of bloodthirsty soldiers. Also according to the bestiary, these things are called crundles. They actually look kind of cute! I'd keep one as a pet if they weren't zombies. Though on second thought, Ingiz would probably just eat it.
9th Slate, 1053, Mid-Spring
I was inspecting various stockpiles today, when I made an interesting discovery; at some point, we managed to catch four cave krakens.
Given the number of dwarves that have been killed by these beasts, most dwarves here aren't fond of them. But now that I think about it, these cave krakens could actually be useful. The bestiary says that cave krakens are actually relatively easy to tame compared to other cavern dwellers. And since the hippo traps haven't shown any progress, perhaps they could serve as a substitute. A moat filled with vicious squids? It's perfect! I should have thought of this before.
11th Slate, 1053, Mid-Spring
Goden began shouting in joy, proclaiming her greatness and superior skill. Goden bragging isn't in any way abnormal, though she's normally not so enthusiastic about it. So I decided to see why she was so excited.
Stinthad: "Goden, what are you so happy about?"
Goden: "Ah, it's you. You see, I've truly begun to master the art of engraving. I have created an image that even the uncultured residents of this fort can appreciate."
Stinthad: "Really? Wow, let me see!"
She then stepped aside, giving me full view of the engraving she had just made. I was shocked by what I saw.
Stinthad: "You...you actually made an engraving of me? And it's not supposed to be insulting? None of the dwarves are trying to stab me? Wow, this is incredible! I never expected this!"
Goden: "Huh? Oh, that one. Well, I figured that was the least I could do, considering you've kept that traitorous snake trapped in the hospital for weeks."
Stinthad: "Traitorous snake?"
Goden: "Nevermind. However, I was actually talking about the engraving next to that one."
12th Slate, 1053, Mid-Spring
Wow, there's a lot of yelling coming up from below. Not the typical screams of distress caused by rampaging beasts, I mean shouts of anger. It seems like two dwarves are arguing over something. From the sound of things, one of them was that mason making an artifact.
Elikstukos: "You! You're a cook, right?"
Raluknish: "What, me?"
Elikstukos: "THERE'S NO ONE ELSE HERE YOU FUCK HEAD! WHO THE FUCK DO YOU THINK I'M TALKING TO?"
Raluknish: "Oh god, um yes I'm a cook. Why?"
Elikstukos: "And as a cook, one of your secondary duties is plant processing, correct?"
Raluknish: "Uh, yes it is."
Elikstukos: "So tell me, what does this picture look like?"
Raluknish: "Er, I think it's a picture of some...waves?"
Elikstukos: "WAVES? FUCKING WAVES? ARE YOU DENSE? IT'S CLOTH! C-L-O-T-H! NOW EXPLAIN TO ME HOW YOU FUCKING IDIOTS DON'T HAVE A SINGLE PIECE OF THIS IN YOUR SHITTY LITTLE FORT!"
Raluknish: "Well, that's simple. We, um, I..."
Elikstukos: "DO YOU EVEN FUCKING KNOW HOW TO MAKE IT?"
Raluknish: "Of course I do! You, um, use...plump helmets?"
Elikstukos: "FUCKING PLUMP HELMETS!?!?!"
This...this does not sound good.
12th Slate, 1053, Mid-Spring
Oh god no this is bad. Uh, I better got get Momuz. Let's see, he's...
Sleeping in the hospital?!? Why?!? He's not hurt!
Wait, that's odd. The shouting stopped. What happened?
13th Slate, 1053, Mid-Spring
It appears that Elikstukos, in her blind rage, actually managed to trigger a cage trap and trapped herself inside it. Now she's basically harmless, as the worst she can do now is shout at you when you walk by. Though even that came to an end when Momuz tied her hands and shoved a sock in her mouth. Goden wants to execute her, claiming that she is now a permanent invalid due to our failure to appease the "gods". I don't believe her! I'm sure in a few weeks Elikstukos will calm down, and then we can put this ugly incident behind us.
17th Slate, 1053, Mid-Spring
While I was tending to patients today I noticed that Atir was no longer in the hospital. Apparently he broke the bonds holding him to the bed and went back to work. Honestly I think he should still be resting, as he has more wounds I haven't treated yet. I still haven't decided if I should amputate his arm or not to prevent infection, but now it's not even an option. Oh well, I guess if he's fit to work he can't be in to bad shape.
Also one of the dwarves said that if I come near Atir with a scalpel again he's going to shove his pickaxe into my skull. I'll just keep away from him for now.
24th Slate, 1053, Mid-Spring
It seems like the second floor of the food stockpile is starting to fill up. We'll have to put in an additional floor pretty soon, otherwise we won't be able to hold more delicious food.
I mean it would be a shame to let such excellent meals go to waste!