The broken rules of video gaming...

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I was bored so I decided to go for the Meat Boy and Focus impossible badges on kongregate. After finishing Meat Boy and giving up on Focus, here are the things I feel these games have messed up so badly...

Rule 1: Thou shall not have piss music and sound effects blasting your ears and giving thou ideas to murder thy speakers or headphones with no mute button.
Violator: Meat Boy
This was baad. Let me interrupt myself here and mention that Woodkid's Iron calms me greatly. So when I cannot listen to it and instead have to hear that same repetitive music over and over again, combined with some levels where there are many rocket launchers making fart noises I couldn't stand myself.

Rule 2: You shall not have inconsistent controls.
Violator: Meat Boy
Let me admit here, that the controls are tight. But they are so inconsistent to the point of frustration. A tap of the left key would simply edge me to a platform, while in some other times will send me flying across the room. I've tried it on same levels with relatively the same moves throughout levels and I can safely confirm that the controls change according to what they please.

Rule 3+4: Thou shall not have little children arguing, nor shall you have blocks that are hard to distinguish from the back ground.
Violators: Kongregate and Meat Boy respectively
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And while on the subject of screenshots, you shouldn't frustrate me to the point of naming my screenshots Arse, Arse2 and WastedTime.avi.

Rule 5: Thou shall not include blue moons in your gameplay nor should you have collectibles from the planet jerk.
image
See these? I hate these one block gaps where you have to tiptoe your massive bum around till the stars align and twilight stops sucking then you will pass. Another thing, notice the bandaid in the middle? I hate those two. You have to squint, glue your face to the monitor and magnify the picture a billion times to notice it. But finding and getting to it isn't the hard part, collecting it is. You see, the last level was called sky pup. Here's the screenshot.
image

That bandaid was an arse to reach, and it took 60 gazillion times for the bandaid to notice I was hugging it to be collected. Then comes the scrolling screen trick where if you are a sniff away from the bottom of the screen, you are dead. Start over. Speaking of that...

Rule 6: You do NOT have crap hitboxes.
Self explanatory I suppose.

But I moved on and finally, finally I managed to end skypup.
image

Yay....

HOWEVER.

Focus was horror. I'll give it two awards since I don't want to think of it any more.

Rule 7: A-hole missiles of the finest quality.
Missile launchers that fire missiles at the rate of about 2 missiles a second, that are so small and so fast your slow motion can't always save you.

Rule 8: You do not cause laptops to strategically exit buildings through windows.

Post the things that made you infuriated, that broke holy rules of games that shouldn't be broken. Can be any type of game.

Capacha: Fair and square. Yeah right...

After playing and finishing a game called Skullface, it feels as if the difficulty from meat boy comes from placing an annoying platform in the middle of an annoying level and sending you back to the beginning. I wouldn't call skullface hard by any means, but I would love to see a hard version of it. Good controls, good music(That can be muted) and best of all... a jetpack.

Come on gentlemenly gentlemen. Share your stories about games that have broken the holy rules of gaming, that you feel every game should follow or at least grasp the basics of.

Hm, it might not be a holy rule of gaming, but it seems pretty important to me, and that is when enemies can hit you through a wall not because their weapon allows for it. My example of this would be dark souls, I doesn't happen often but the few times I've died from being hit by a silver knight through a wall I can remember compared to countless other deaths I have had.

How about: Thou Shalt Not Have Inconsistent or Haphazard Checkpoints?
My example of this is the original Mass Effect. Since I found combat to be clunky at the best of times and an absolute clusterfuck at the worst, I do not like going through three rooms and six loading screens without manually saving just to be one-shot by a rocket drone off-screen, sending me all the way back to square one. What makes this worse is that the game does autosave, only it does so so rarely that it might as well not.
At least they fixed that in the sequels, but it still led to a lot of frustration.

If you don't like the Kongregate chat just turn it off (either by leaving the chat room or by switching from the "chat" tab to another one, like "game" or "achievement").
Now, having no mute button can't really be excused, but you could still mute your browser's sound via Volume Mixer (or your OS's equivalent), or even mute the individual tab, if your browser supports that. Though I agree, a mute button should really be included in every game
As for the "insanely difficult" points, you were playing Meat Boy, a game that's all about insanely difficult challenges. Don't know about the inconsistent controls and hitboxes though, it's been a long while since I last played it.

Personal "favourite" broken rules of video gaming?
1) Unskippable cutscenes, doubly so if between a checkpoint and a ridiculous bossfight, bonus points if said bossfight has one of those 700-stage 5-minute attack animation bosses.
2) Tacked-on multiplayer, especially if it serves no real purpose other than excusing always-requiring-an-infallible-internet-connection-DRM.
3) Not being able to mute certain people in multiplayer games.
4) Minigames that detract from the overall gameplay, but have to be completed in order to continue.

Thou shalt not send me into the same monster infested cave/temple/fortress over and over again.

World of Warcraft used to do this a lot. The quest giver would tell you to go into a nearby castle and kill a certain named enemy. After fighting your way in through the mobs you'd find the target and kill him. Then you'd go back to the quest giver and he'd say "Well done. Now can you go and kill his boss - he's in the room next to the one where you killed the first guy."

In particularly annoying cases the target of the second quest would be so placed that you'd almost certainly had to kill him on the way to completing the original quest - so now you have to kill him again. Repeating this three or four times over wasn't unknown.

The Cataclysm revamp cleaned most of these up, but left a few intact. There's a multi level aztec style city full of trolls in the Hinterlands and you get sent in there about five times - hacking your way through the same hordes of enemies every single time...

King of Asgaard:
How about: Thou Shalt Not Have Inconsistent or Haphazard Checkpoints?
My example of this is the original Mass Effect. Since I found combat to be clunky at the best of times and an absolute clusterfuck at the worst, I do not like going through three rooms and six loading screens without manually saving just to be one-shot by a rocket drone off-screen, sending me all the way back to square one. What makes this worse is that the game does autosave, only it does so so rarely that it might as well not.
At least they fixed that in the sequels, but it still led to a lot of frustration.

Oh god, this a thousand times this, the amount of times I threw my controller down and refused to continue for a few days. The one that always got me was the level where you go to get Liara and right before you enter the mine you have to fight a fuck ton of geth and one of the geth tanks on foot. If you die there you go back to the beginning of the level about twenty minutes of bouncy tank gameplay to re-do.

Dead rising also had this problem big time. I couldn't even finish that game. It was fun but between the time constraints and the broken save system I gave up about half way through.

Insta-death dice roll areas around enemies in action games.

Yeah, fuck you Resident Evil 5.

Subscriptism:

King of Asgaard:
How about: Thou Shalt Not Have Inconsistent or Haphazard Checkpoints?
My example of this is the original Mass Effect. Since I found combat to be clunky at the best of times and an absolute clusterfuck at the worst, I do not like going through three rooms and six loading screens without manually saving just to be one-shot by a rocket drone off-screen, sending me all the way back to square one. What makes this worse is that the game does autosave, only it does so so rarely that it might as well not.
At least they fixed that in the sequels, but it still led to a lot of frustration.

Oh god, this a thousand times this, the amount of times I threw my controller down and refused to continue for a few days. The one that always got me was the level where you go to get Liara and right before you enter the mine you have to fight a fuck ton of geth and one of the geth tanks on foot. If you die there you go back to the beginning of the level about twenty minutes of bouncy tank gameplay to re-do.

Yeah, that was where I got stuck too.
The other egregious offender was Luna base. Those bastarded rocket drones...
While not story important, it gives a good reward, and there isn't a reason NOT to do it, but those fucking drones ruin it.

You know what I should play a terrible game based on norse mythology. Then I could make a joke like: This game is the King of Assgard... Too human here I come. Oh, you left? Coward...

I think if I had a massive issue with checkpoints it was Demon Souls. Oh lord was that bad.

Uh... always put checkpoints/save points between time consuming things, such as bosses or long cutscenes. Examples of this would be Persona 3- there is a very long cutscene after the Hanged Man boss, and all I could think of was 'I hope my parents don't force me to stop playing'. Not a big issue for everyone, but it was for me.
And since I've been playing X3 a lot recently, how about: 'Include actual tutorials and explanations.' Because if you don't know what you're doing, it takes forever to start off in those games.

Thou shalt not make attack and block the same button.

Thou shalt not make upping the difficulty grant the Computer cheats and omniscience. I am now pretty much permanently against upping the difficulty on any RTS because I have never seen one that didn't just make the computer cheat more than I did on Age of Empires 2.

Lazy:
Thou shalt not make attack and block the same button.

What game did that?

How about we just do away with checkpoints as a main method of saving your game? They're fine as an "oops I forgot to save" thing, but I detest games that force me to rely on them. There's just no reason to do this except to make your game more frustratingly difficult (see Dark Souls, which did this on purpose), or because you're lazy and want to artificially increase the length and difficulty of it (see just about any console shooter).

thou shalt not do things that i dislike, my word is law! quality is objective!

King of Asgaard:

Subscriptism:

King of Asgaard:
How about: Thou Shalt Not Have Inconsistent or Haphazard Checkpoints?
My example of this is the original Mass Effect. Since I found combat to be clunky at the best of times and an absolute clusterfuck at the worst, I do not like going through three rooms and six loading screens without manually saving just to be one-shot by a rocket drone off-screen, sending me all the way back to square one. What makes this worse is that the game does autosave, only it does so so rarely that it might as well not.
At least they fixed that in the sequels, but it still led to a lot of frustration.

Oh god, this a thousand times this, the amount of times I threw my controller down and refused to continue for a few days. The one that always got me was the level where you go to get Liara and right before you enter the mine you have to fight a fuck ton of geth and one of the geth tanks on foot. If you die there you go back to the beginning of the level about twenty minutes of bouncy tank gameplay to re-do.

Yeah, that was where I got stuck too.
The other egregious offender was Luna base. Those bastarded rocket drones...
While not story important, it gives a good reward, and there isn't a reason NOT to do it, but those fucking drones ruin it.

Noveria peak (whatever number) did that really badly too, I remember leaving the hot labs after activating the purge thingy and getting killed, I went back to when you first arrive on the tramway. Nothing puts me off a game more than shit autosaves.

Subscriptism:

King of Asgaard:

Subscriptism:

Oh god, this a thousand times this, the amount of times I threw my controller down and refused to continue for a few days. The one that always got me was the level where you go to get Liara and right before you enter the mine you have to fight a fuck ton of geth and one of the geth tanks on foot. If you die there you go back to the beginning of the level about twenty minutes of bouncy tank gameplay to re-do.

Yeah, that was where I got stuck too.
The other egregious offender was Luna base. Those bastarded rocket drones...
While not story important, it gives a good reward, and there isn't a reason NOT to do it, but those fucking drones ruin it.

Noveria peak (whatever number) did that really badly too, I remember leaving the hot labs after activating the purge thingy and getting killed, I went back to when you first arrive on the tramway. Nothing puts me off a game more than shit autosaves.

I know exactly what you mean.
After spending a good couple of hours fighting your way through a dungeon, only having the whole run, perfect or otherwise, erased in an instant because of an oversight is what used to put me off a lot of games when I was younger, specifically RPGs. Nowadays, I just grit my teeth and endeavour to get through the section as quickly as possible, and as identically as the first time. But it's never as good as the first time, is it?

You forgot the rule where if you take the time to make up eight rules for what video games can't do anymore, you should probably stop playing games for a bit.

-Thou shall not stun-lock
-Thou shall not have unskippable cutscene that appear even when they are view for a second time.
-Thou shall not cheat (Having the computer AI cheat to ahead)
-Thou shall not introduce terrible game mechanics for no good reason (Random tripping in SSBB)
-Thou shall not steal my bacon

Kinda want to also mention the existence of the blue shell here since really, that item is completely useless. Someone in last place shouldn't care about who is in first since they need to get in front of x number of people. The only thing the blue shell does is waste an item slot for the player behind, and a headache for the person in first.

Sixcess:
Thou shalt not send me into the same monster infested cave/temple/fortress over and over again.

Ahhhh yes, this is a good one that I remember from my days in WoW. Noteable offenders also include Rage and Borderlands.

I really can't stand games that have you clear out a dungeon then when you turn in that quest they're like "Hey! Thanks for killing all the jagoffwobblers in that cave! Now you get to go back to that same fucking cave, but this time you're looking for the magical jagoff crystals!"

Why the fuck couldn't they have mentioned that before? Could I not have been collecting jagoff crystals WHILE killing jagoffwobblers? Just pointless BS game-padding.

As for my own rule, "Thou Shalt Not Make A Game With Ridiculously Shitty Controls Designed Specifically To Give Players A Hard Time So The Game Can Claim To Be The Most Difficult Game Ever Made." Yeah, that's right, I said it! I'd imagine this might piss some people off as it's rather obvious what game I'm talking about. :3

But seriously, it's pretty easy to claim your game is brutally difficult when a majority of that difficulty stems from the fucking controls themselves.

On a more light hearted note: "With The Exception Of FPS's, Thou Shalt Always Include A Toggle Function Between Running And Walking If The Game Has Such A Function." This comes from Batman wandering his ass around Arkham City because you have to hold down the run button.

So I play a lot of Mass Effect 3 multiplayer on PC and here we go:

1. Thou shall let us see a list of available servers [and their ping] and choose one as an alternative to having one chosen for us
2. Thou shall let us see our own, and other players' ping.

Of course the reason EA violates these 2 rules is because they are trying (and failing) to hide the fact they have violated the next one.

3. Thou shall have enough servers close enough to your customers so that they can actually play your game without unacceptable levels of lag and without losing the connection to the servers.

4. Thou shall have customer service which acknowledges what customers are telling it. "the problem must be with your internet connection, make sure you're probably connected to the internet otherwise you will not be able to access the online portions of this game" is NOT an acceptable response when your customer has explained that; they are properly connected to the internet, they can access the online portions of the game. That when they do lose connection to their server they are still connected to the internet, and that their game is only product with which they have this problem.

From this I have created some rules for gamers:

1. Thou shall like many of EA's games, but still hate EA.

2. Thou shall not use EA Origin whenever an alternative is available.

3. Thou shall EA's customer service

4. Thou shall hate EA.

If thou MUST have an escort quest in your game, make sure that the damn escortee has more health than a wet tissue. Also, make sure they have decent pathfinding, and A.I. that can tie it's shoes.

1. Thou shalt allow multiple save slots
While save-scumming is possible with multiple slots, I really detest auto-save one save mechanisms for two reasons.

a. When it auto-saves while you have virtually no health and have thus broken the game to the point of having to restart from the beginning.

b. When this single save gets corrupted losing 35 hours of work, it irritates me.

2. Thou shalt not have online achievements (that are not just participation based
Now while some may think this is being petty, I have found that achievements that require some great feats online lead to boosting and people playing the game for reasons other than to play. It was/is very irritating when you go online to enjoy your dose of murder and mayhem to find a bunch of people who don't like you and kick you since you don't want to sit around and help with their achievements. Believe it or not, this helps Modern Warfare since people online are there to just play.

3. Thou shalt not have context sensitive buttons in scenarios where you have more than one context to use
I find this to be greatly irritating in many cover shooters such as Gears of War and most recently Spec Ops. If I need to do things quickly then I can't waste time to figure out what the button does. This was really bad in Spec Ops where the A (X if you play PS3) button was sprint, hug wall, slip out of cover and heal your teammate. This worked well in the tutorial since they only ever wanted one thing from you, but when you are trying to run to cover and you stop, stand up, and heal your downed moronic monkey teammates who hop around in the middle of battlefield like dancing retards, and you subsequently die for this action it is unacceptable.

4. Thou shalt not have an online pass for a server that is to be shut down
This may be a little high level but I don't care if there is an online pass, however, if that is the case the server to play better damn well be up till the end of the generation. I can buy older games new and get screwed out of the experience since the server doesn't actually exist anymore. There is a disclaimer that they can shut it down with thirty days notice, but that isn't really fair since you may have purchased the game afterwards.

5. Thou shalt not force players online for a single player experience
Interesting fact: NFS: Carbon for xbox360 can't even be started to play the single player campaign without a connection to the server.

6. Thou shalt not have infinite enemies spawn while having limited resources
It especially sucks when the enemies are forever but the ammo or whatever I use to dispatch them is limited. I love Payday but I get annoyed when I run out of ammo after killing 200 cops in under ten minutes. Where the fuck do these supercops come from anyways? I don't think anything short of a state of emergency would warrant a response like that that quickly.

7. Thou shalt not have damage/health based difficulty
If you want your game to be more challenging on harder difficulties then make it so. Don't just nerf my ability to kill and my health down to two hits. That is not a challenge. That is just an exercise in frustration management.

8. Thou shalt not place an unskippable cutscene after a checkpoint
I get the idea of putting the cutscene after it. I may have put the game down for a day or two and want a refresher on what is going on, but if I die repeatedly I shouldn't have to watch the same sequence of 2 minutes every time I die.

9. Thou shalt allow customisation of controls
For fuck sakes, its 2013. Let me set up the controls the way I like it. EA in particular, I don't want to use the second analog stick to shoot in hockey. It worked better with the buttons. Let me use them already. This is why I only ever buy your hockey games for $5 used anymore.

I could go on but I'm tired of typing...

EDIT

10. Thou shalt have all difficulties available at the start of the game
Why the fuck do I need to beat a game on one difficulty to unlock another difficulty? Let me try the hard ones first if I want. If I suck, the game will beat me down and I will switch the difficulty to a lower level. I don't need you to hold my hand for me.

parts of RPGs that seperate you entirely from your party. Seriously annoys me.

Useless characters in RPGs (Looking at you kimahri!)

King of Asgaard:

Subscriptism:

King of Asgaard:

Yeah, that was where I got stuck too.
The other egregious offender was Luna base. Those bastarded rocket drones...
While not story important, it gives a good reward, and there isn't a reason NOT to do it, but those fucking drones ruin it.

Noveria peak (whatever number) did that really badly too, I remember leaving the hot labs after activating the purge thingy and getting killed, I went back to when you first arrive on the tramway. Nothing puts me off a game more than shit autosaves.

I know exactly what you mean.
After spending a good couple of hours fighting your way through a dungeon, only having the whole run, perfect or otherwise, erased in an instant because of an oversight is what used to put me off a lot of games when I was younger, specifically RPGs. Nowadays, I just grit my teeth and endeavour to get through the section as quickly as possible, and as identically as the first time. But it's never as good as the first time, is it?

Never is as good. Thankfully most game producers don't make these mistakes any more.

Lazy:
Thou shalt not make attack and block the same button.

Are you referencing the new Metal Gear demo by any chance? God that is so bad... Forward X to parry, X to attack. Professional game design.

OT: Don't make unique final bosses in fighting games... Especially ones based around keepaway. The final boss of DoA4 still haunts me to this day. I DID beat her with every single character in the end though. Moral victory. Her regular grab took off three quarters of your health bar.

Bloody Marie in Skullgirls is bearable because she's damn cool and the music and stage is awesome. UMVC3 somehow makes Galactus the easiest boss ever... X-Factor really shows its place as a completely broken mechanic there.

I might say something about not including a comeback mechanic but really, UMVC3 shows the power of a hilarious power up button. Literally a God Mode button avalible to both players, so it's completely balanced yet absolutely broken at the same time.

SkarKrow:
Insta-death dice roll areas around enemies in action games.

Yeah, fuck you Resident Evil 5.

God those cockroaches were just Bad Enemy Design 101. Do not make enemies that can only be hit in a weakpoint but then give the player no way to reveal the weakpoint. You just have to sit there and wait until he decides to reveal it. Speaking of the insta-kill, its basically how not to do one-hit-kills. It comes out instantly, has deceptive range, and has no way to save yourself/be saved once he starts it.

Basically, don't make shitty enemies like that

LtFerret:

SkarKrow:
Insta-death dice roll areas around enemies in action games.

Yeah, fuck you Resident Evil 5.

God those cockroaches were just Bad Enemy Design 101. Do not make enemies that can only be hit in a weakpoint but then give the player no way to reveal the weakpoint. You just have to sit there and wait until he decides to reveal it. Speaking of the insta-kill, its basically how not to do one-hit-kills. It comes out instantly, has deceptive range, and has now way to save/be saved once he starts it.

Basically, don't make shitty enemies like that

That enemy is one of the worst in any game ever, my friend and I powered through the entire game until those things came. One is fine, since they basically demand power weaponry or insane patience and accuracy, but when they have random spawns the mission after they come in it's ridiculous.
I looked into a it a bit more and from what I gather it's based on a dice roll when you're within a certain range.

The range is about 10 feet though, which is pretty big, and the dice roll is something like 1/10 and re-rolled every 5 seconds or so. Which is why those things are fucking bullshit and on a second run were nothing but rocket launcher fodder for me.

6 was better than 5. No RE game to date has topped the masterpiece that is 4.

Rule 4 is a big one.

And one that Bit.Trip Beat fails at completely.

What's the point of the game? Hitting neon squares with your neon rectangle. The neon squares get increasingly difficult patterns, making reflexes the most important thing the player has.

Simple enough.

And then it decides that it also feels like throwing around hundreds of non-essential neon squares, on a background full of neon squares, because particles were fun in Geometry Wars, right guys?

Nope, now I just can't fucking see.

And don't even get me started on the trial and error bullshit in Runner.

Quick question, this thread isn't going to get into any trouble because of some people's tendency to swear here, right?

MiskWisk:
Thou shalt not make upping the difficulty grant the Computer cheats and omniscience. I am now pretty much permanently against upping the difficulty on any RTS because I have never seen one that didn't just make the computer cheat more than I did on Age of Empires 2.

Well if you can think of a way to make RTS AI genuinely outsmart human beings feel free to share it. Maybe you'll get a job at Blizzard or something. Possibly you might get a Nobel Prize.

Current AI is only better than humans in specific cases where it has natural advantages. Eg:

- Limited possibilities. The number of chess positions a computer must examine to see 6 moves or more ahead is small enough for the computer.

- Fast reaction times.

- Complicated maths required. That's why computers can play poker well.

- Multitasking. Women claim they can multitask. Computers really can multitask. They are reasonably good at Starcraft because they keep doing basic stuff like building workers, expanding, building supply depots on time, upgrading, and making sure they spend their income. Humans, women included, generally drop the ball and get behind unless they are really good.

Now that last one does mean that an AI can be difficult without actually cheating. Unfortunately this is only true when efficient production requires constant attention. Other, arguably better games, make production largely maintainence free, and suddenly the AI has no edge. In Age of Empires you can queue up lots of units because you only have to pay for them when they actually start production. In Starcraft you must pay when you queue them, tying up cash, so good players must use queues minimally and be constantly ordering more. I'd prefer unit queues that are actually useful.

TL/DR no such thing as AI that genuinely outsmarts experienced humans. Maybe in future, but today you are asking too much.

There are not and should not be any inherent "rules" not to be broken in video games.

The main problem with them is that everyone's idea of a rule never to be broken is subjective. There's no point in setting close-minded rules when anyone can pull an example where said rule was broken yet done well. Seriously. Almost any "bad game design" rule someone can bring up, someone else can provide an example of where that mechanic was used well. That's just how diverse games are.

I would instead focus on mechanics of individual games instead of trying to generalize "every time this mechanic is used in any game it must be bad because I say so".

Also, I've never played Meat Boy, but Super Meat Boy was superb and I wholly recommend it.

Thou shalt not trip gameplay with quick-time events.
Thou shalt not spread checkpoints thin.
Thou shalt not sneak in stealth missions in non-stealth games.
Thou shalt not make sidequest windows and cut-offs invisible.
Thou shalt not rip off GTA for sandboxes.
Thou shalt not rip off RE4 for third person shooters.
Thou shalt not rip off God of War for hack n' slashes.

Thou shalt not play shitty games and then complain about them.

I lost count of how many rules we are in, but I'd very much love it if games stopped spawning additional enemies during boss-fights right next to me. T'is not so much a problem when I am playing a melee or otherwise armored character, but when Beneziah started spawning Asari Commandos next to my sniping Shepphard with armor made of pudding... that wasn't very fair.

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