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BANNED Posts: 126 Joined: 23 Oct 2008    | |
Beat Writer  Posts: 132 Joined: 14 Dec 2007     | Yeah..... "funny" |
Gone Gonzo  Posts: 4061 Joined: 6 Feb 2008    | Okay, I couldn't beat Mario 2... |
On the Record  Posts: 6912 Joined: 29 Jul 2008    | Most of these only apply to old gamers. |
Gone Gonzo  Posts: 1540 Joined: 15 Dec 2008  | Once again, Old Wizard shows how stupid he/she/they/it is. It is quite possible to miss with a red shell. It's highly unlikely, but it is possible. |
On the Record  Posts: 5476 Joined: 2 Feb 2009     | The only funny one was Pac-Man... Those guys are kinda of idiots for bashing Pokemon for having pretty colours...the first 2 were black and white....(i think) But hey if a way to tell you suck at gaming is cause of the colours of the games you play, Halo takes the cup! Really you play a dude in a green suit and he sometimes rides purple vehicles killing multicoloured aliens with guns that shoots pink missiles!!! They should rename Halo to The Yellow Submarine Chronicles! Urg.... |
Gone Gonzo  Posts: 1763 Joined: 5 Jun 2008     | I play pokemon and Im fucking awesome. |
Muckraker  Posts: 226 Joined: 26 Feb 2009    | Not that funny. It's true that Super Mario 2 was very easy, though. It may have been the first game that I ever beat. I'm not sure if I remember exactly how to get to the first warp zone in Super Mario 1. I remember something about breaking a hidden block with a vine in it and using that to get on top of the level. But it's been at least 10 years since I played that game, so I'm a bit fuzzy on the details. |
Gone Gonzo  Posts: 2489 Joined: 29 Nov 2007     | Only the weak use axes on the Bat Boss. In my day we could rip through the thing using the whip AND WE LIKED IT. |
Infamous Scribbler  Posts: 631 Joined: 16 Feb 2009   | Those were not really universal "you suck" rules for gaming, it should be more like, "If you talk trash after a game, YOU LOST AT, of Halo 3 then you SUCK!!! |
PROBATION  Posts: 213 Joined: 14 Feb 2009  |
What's wrong with Pokemon? User was put on probation for: Well hello Escapist readers!. (Permanent) |
Muckraker  Posts: 250 Joined: 9 Oct 2008  | I havent played many of the games mentioned, but I can get a no scop head shoot from across the map in halo and Im on my second prestige in COD 4. |
Copy Clerk  Posts: 110 Joined: 8 Dec 2008   | LoL ive only played like one off theese. Thats pokemon, and that was when was like 8. |
Gone Gonzo  Posts: 2214 Joined: 8 Oct 2008   |
"The Yellow Submarine Chronicles" hahaha that's a good one! |
Gone Gonzo Posts: 2214 Joined: 8 Oct 2008 | I'll try to post an actual list later but for now, you know you SUCK when you get killed by a lone wretch, on casual difficulty in Gears 2 never mind about the list |
On the Record  Posts: 6403 Joined: 14 Sep 2008   | There are few Gameboy Color games better than Pokemon in the terms of RPG. However, there ARE better RPGs at GBA. Golden Sun is at least as awesome as Bioware games. |
Copy Clerk  Posts: 78 Joined: 31 Aug 2008   |
I am forced to respectfully disagree my good man. Tournament level play of Pokemon is some pretty serious stuff, I personally love to grind in RPGs and work out stats, maximize abilitys and eliminate weaknesses etc, but even I can't get my head around the full Pokemon metagame, it's some really hardcore stuff. Anyway, the list in general is pretty pathetic even from an "entertainment" standpoint. |
Gone Gonzo  Posts: 2794 Joined: 12 Jul 2008  | I like pokemon. It's by no means the best game in the world but it's a handy little time waster which is nice to have now and then. |
Beat Writer  Posts: 148 Joined: 3 Feb 2009  | I stopped reading after about the third misspelling/instance of incorrect grammar. If you're going to write something that's poking fun at others, at least take the time to use fucking spell check. |
Press Junketeer  Posts: 406 Joined: 18 Oct 2008  | thats kinda stupid |
Gone Gonzo  Posts: 2899 Joined: 14 Jan 2009    | You can't get out of the Super Metroid Space Station in time Yes you do suck if you can't do that thats like the first part of the game lol |
Gone Gonzo Posts: 4061 Joined: 6 Feb 2008 |
Vine? On the second level there are elevator things going up. You can use those to get 'above' the level and thus to jump over the warp pipe you 'should' use. This takes you to the first warp zone. |
Pulitzer Laureate  Posts: 946 Joined: 2 Jul 2008 |
I second this. |
Muckraker  Posts: 306 Joined: 25 Feb 2009   | Johnny Cage is my shit! |
Paperboy  Posts: 20 Joined: 8 May 2008     | Yeah, the whole Pokémon thing with number one reeks of trolling. Especially when everything leading up to that is a list of things in games that should be simple to complete. I also take issue with this: "In most fighting games, the first person you fight is not even meant to teach you how to play the game. It's just meant to give you confidence in order to fight the next opponent, where you really start developing your skills to beat a game." How true is this, really? I seem to have some memories of playing Mortal Kombat II, fighting Baraka in the first round, and getting my ass handed to me. Of course maybe all of this is just because I really do suck at video games. |
Press Junketeer  Posts: 383 Joined: 16 May 2008   | never bet mario 2 |
Muckraker  Posts: 249 Joined: 10 Jul 2008 | Yep, I still hate oldwizard. |
Muckraker Posts: 226 Joined: 26 Feb 2009 |
Um, I think maybe I was actually thinking of the second warp zone in World 4-2. Let's not pretend like I'm crazy, though. |
Gone Gonzo Posts: 4061 Joined: 6 Feb 2008 |
Maybe... I can just remember the first one because of the feeling that you were 'breaking the game' when you got to it. |
Senior Editor  Posts: 2810 Joined: 9 Jan 2007    | "How to tell if you're an old, arrogant jerk." 1. You wrote that article. Though, to be fair, I'm pretty sure that's the vibe they're going for. |
Press Junketeer  Posts: 449 Joined: 8 Jan 2009 | Mario 2 isn't even Mario--it's an enormous ripoff. Maybe that's why it's so easy. |
Infamous Scribbler  Posts: 514 Joined: 20 Aug 2008 |
Seconded bunch of retards are NOT funny in the slightest. |
BANNED  Posts: 3682 Joined: 23 Oct 2007   | I've beaten Operation Flashpoint and ArmA: Armed Assault. I feel confident in my computer gaming abilities. User was banned for: New Year's Eve...New Year resolutions. (Permanent) |
Pulitzer Laureate  Posts: 730 Joined: 10 Feb 2009   | Total flamebait. Last I checked Pokemon is a quality game series and just because it's aimed at children doesn't mean people can't play it. Hell, there's a tournament scene around it and apparently high level play gets pretty damn complex. Yes, the game is pretty easy by itself but so is pretty much every game out there. Do I suck for playing Dawn of War because the campaign is a total pushover? Do I suck for playing Braid? Do I suck for playing The Maw? Does every game have to be "this is what I remember games being like"-difficult? When we were kids we all sucked at games. That's why now the retro sequels are insanely hard because we compare their difficulty with the challenge the old game posed with our inferior skills. Contra 4 is second only to Hard Corps in difficulty. Megaman 9 has so many spikes they could have called it Vlad Tepes' Return. |
Copy Clerk  Posts: 107 Joined: 18 Feb 2009  | Pokemon is a fun game! =) |
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http://old-wizard.com/top-10-ways-to-tell-if-you-suck-at-video-games
caught this on n4g. another list from old-wizard. this one is actually funny.