Sadly, no amount of apologizing will ever make this song stop hurting.
Though non-Norwegians may have missed it, Oslo played host last week to the Norwegian Developers Conference (NDC). Seemingly on a mission to help their product stand out, a team from Microsoft Norway opted to welcome attendees to a presentation on updates to Windows Azure by subjecting them to an evil Europop outing that included the line, "the words MICRO and SOFT don't apply to my PENIS (or vagina)."
Unsurprisingly, more than few people took to Twitter to object to the show's ostensibly raunchy dancing and its bizarre choice of lyrics. Prompted into action by these Tweets and, one presumes, their bosses, a team from Windows Azure posted a YouTube comment apologizing for the whole thing.
"This week's Norwegian Developer's Conference included a skit that involved inappropriate and offensive elements and vulgar language," reads the comment, which has been posted on two uploads of the show. "We apologize to our customers and our partners and are actively looking into the matter."
Dubbed "Developersong" in the attached video, the bulk of the oeuvre concerns how keen NDC's developers are on partying, coding, and then partying some more. Dancers, rendered almost invisible by the show's mid-century disco lighting, bop along to the music. A Babylon 5-style voice provides most of the, well, singing.
All in all, the part about genitalia doesn't really seem to add that much more offensive material to what is already a harrowing example of weapons-grade Europop. The crowd seem to find it vaguely amusing ("CSS is my LSD!"), at least.
C'mon, Windows Azure Norway. If Europop was what you wanted, couldn't you have hired the Buranovskiye Babushki to sing about the wonders of cloud computing? Or how about asking this group of fine young Norwegians to mince their way through a song about the rock'n'roll coders of Scandinavia? Or how about Lordi? Europe loves Lordi! Oh man. "Developersong" could have been so much more.