Op-Ed

Dear Hillary, You're Not Going to Win Anyway

| 8 Jun 2006 12:47

Hillary Clinton has apparently renewed her commitment to saving the children from themselves. While attempting to generate support and funding for her pet media research project, the Senator for New York (from Arkansas) was quoted as saying,

We don't know the effects [of media on children]... Never have children been raised in such a media-saturated environment. How do we get more research, better facts and evidence?

I would suggest that the senator from New York (Arkansas) look to her own childhood and explain how she turned into such an upstanding, ambitious pillar of society in spite of the deleterious effects of such corrupting influences as rock and roll music and comic books. Or, if she can't remember back that far, perhaps she should read this 1954 report on the contribution of comic books to juvenile delinquency, which states that:

... this country cannot affored (sic) the calculated risk involved in feeding its children, through comic books, a concentrated diet of crime, horror, and violence ... there may be detrimental and delinquency-producing effects ... the welfare of this Nation's young makes it mandatory that all concerned unite in supporting sincere efforts of the industry to raise the standards of its products and in demanding adequate standards of decency and good taste.

then, after developing an informed, historical understanding of the impact of emerging media on the young, have a good laugh at herself and her own ridiculousness (like I'm doing now), smoke one of her husband's unlit joints and relax.

Because really, no matter what she says at this point, there's no way in hell she's ever going to be president, so she may as well lay off.

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