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Fox's "24" Goes Pinball, Jack Yells Incoherently

| 6 Feb 2009 11:00
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Damn it! There's no there's no time! I must play "24" pinball, now!

Damn it! Fox's terrorist busting drama, "24", is back on the air. No, I'm not angry because the past few seasons have been rather disappointing, I'm angry because there has yet to be a decent video game based on the heroic, testosterone-packed antics of former-CTU agent, Jack "I'd Shoot Nina Twice" Bauer. Damn it! Well, fortunately for fans of the show, that may very well change with the release of the "24" pinball machine by the wizards at Stern Pinball.

Damn it! That means you'll have to wait possibly March to start seeing these pop up in mini-golf courses and bowling alleys around the country, so for now you'll have to make due with these details. The board is designed by the famed pinball expert, Steve Ritchie, who worked on such classics as Terminator 2: Judgement Day and Star Trek: The Next Generation, with art by Pinball Hall of Fame inductee Kevin O'Connor and sound work by Ken Hale, who recently worked on Stern's own The Dark Knight. True to the "24" name, the game features original voice work by Mary Lynn Rajskub, better known as Chloe "I Work With Computers" O'Brian. Damn it! No Keifer? Couldn't they at least get Dennis Haysbert, so we could rest easy knowing that we were in good hands?

From suitcases that hold multiballs, sniper houses that reveal terrorist hideouts and more, "24" pinball sounds like the infamous Jack Bauer Power Hour crammed into a tiny glass case. Damn it! The only way it could be more like "24" would be if halfway through your game, it was revealed that the left flipper was a terrorist mole, working in conjunction with the top bumpers to assassinate the president by means of a faulty kick-back unit. Damn it! I should design a pinball.

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