Here's the question: Does he want to kill it, or does he want to have sex with it? Do birds even have sex? Nevermind, I don't want to know.
All recent Final Fantasy games have had their own soft-drink tie-ins in Japan, and Final Fantasy XIII has an Elixir of its very own. Every can comes with a picture of one of the game's characters, including the little baby Chocobo that lives in the Funny Afro of supporting character Sazh.
Upon seeing the baby chocobo adorning the can, this little - okay, uh ... I don't know what it is, but he's adorable and looks like a real-life baby chocobo - fellow freaks out at the sight of his look-alike.
It's weird. It's funny. It's strangely adorable. Just watch the video, people.