"Hold on, you and Sister went here for a date? Wow, I learn new things every day."
I crash a plane into the Ice Cream store, imolating everyone in a 300-metre radius.
"That was news to you, Tox? Wow."
Then Sigma happens.
I respawn next to the wreckage.
"This is one example of what I was talking about, Salt. In case you hadn't guessed."
I respawn next to Trilby. "How would I have known? I haven't been here for like months, dude!"
"I dunno, I just assumed it had come up at some point when you were around because it's like the only thing Salt goes on about."
"I guess I can look on the bright side. At least I'm not Trilby."
I walk up to the ice cream shoppe.
"Aw man, I really wanted that sherbet!"
The ice cream shoppe respawns.
Paddy the Second:
I lie on the floor. My tulpa stands outside the church tapping his feet.
"I placed the order for sherbet first, dude."
I flood it again, but this time with liquid nitrogen.
"... Damn you."
The ice cream is already frozen, numbnuts.
"Besides, handicapped. So I get precedent."
But the patrons were not.
>people in the mall other than us
I am purely bamboozled.
"Oh god, that innocent couple who also just happened to be here was frozen solid."
The ice cream shoppe respawns, minus the nonexistent patrons.
I sneak in front of Salt and score all the sherbet.
"So, where the fuck's that sherbet?"
I lean over to RaN and steal some of the sherbet, eating it before he can put the blame on me.
"Why are you making eating noises if I got first dibs?"
"...Sis, is he eating all the fucking sherbet?"
"Nah, RaN -*nom nom nom*- would never do that."
*mmf nom nom* "No."
A tiny robot butler pulls on your pantleg and hands you your one scoop of sherbet.
I calmly seat myself across RaN, staring intently at him.
"So-*nom nom*-how's your sex laife, RaN?"
I take the scoop and begin eating.
"This is a fairly pleasant change of pace."
"Oh." *mmf* "About as nonexistent as this ice cream."
I hold up my empty pint.
"That was more predictable than uh...fuck, what's a good insult..."
"A blind guy in a SoHo club?"
"...Way to be insensitive to your fellow colleagues."
"I don't know what RaN said, but I agree with him on principle."
"Send the warlocks. I'll stand up when they get here."
I pour water all over everyone and their sherbert.
I pour gasoline all over everyone and their sherbet.