Jimquisition: Monster Boobs And Plastic Children

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Being such a crowded sea bound country, you can't blame the Japanese for wanting girls with huge... "tracts of land"
But THIS is a bit much.

I cackled like a mad scientist discovering pop rocks.

I have no problem with buxom women. Most of the human species, regardless of their gender or sexual orientation, most of US EVERYWHERE, love and revere breasts. They are delightful, they are beautiful they are not balloons in a wind tunnel. That's the difference. I'm not sure about this children's body thing was on bout, but the women of dead or alive and their demonically possessed mammary glands are a great example of wanting one thing (titillation, sex appeal) and getting something else (freak show clown-breasts). I've always had an issue with this. I played Dead or Alive Xtreme 2 (I use "played" loosely as this isn't much of a game at all) and was put off by it's lackluster execution. The hands and feet didn't articulate at all, and the faces wee frozen and scarier than anything I'd ever encountered in Silent hill. Does this mean I hate sex in games? Not at all, hell I welcome it as much as I would in movies or television as long as it is somehow meaningfully executed.

The issue with their breasts are the worst offenders of all. Tipping their head to one side or moving a hand would result in a violent breast revolt, as if they were literally attempting to free themselves from these women and escape earth's gravity. The new Dead or Alive game does indeed look better from what little I have seen, their women no longer look like strange anime mannequins, I just hope they realize bigger isn't always better (nothing wrong with big, humble, and all in between), and lifelike, if sex is their goal, would probably mean less silly-putty physics.

I guess I'm a sexual deviant, then. Not that that's any surprise, really. In fact, I've known it for a long time. That may not be the way breasts work in real life, but I'm sure as hell going to enjoy them in all of their fake, fantastic, imagined, unreal glory. I'm not particularly fond of real women, anyway.

Still an entertaining episode, though. Jim, you're a funny guy, even if I don't share your views.


Jimothy Sterling:


A) Fair enough.
B) Actually in this case, yes it is. It's wrong to rag on people for something they can't help. If it's harming nobody, and it's not a choice, then all you're doing is spreading unwarranted hatred.
C) Oh I'm looking at them all right. And don't make me laugh. Those girls aren't kids. You're a kid until you're 13. Then you're a teenager until you're 20. For some reason at some point somebody decided that 18 is the cutoff number for pedophilia. If, God forbid, a 17 or 16 year old girl should blossom early, and you DARE find her attractive, you're somehow a sick person. I don't think I need to explain why this concept is stupid.
D) Still looking. Fetishist pride, baby! We're here, we're weird, get used to it.

B) You're arguing now that it's WRONG. Not that it's hypocritical.
C) They have the faces of porcelain children.

Most Japanese woman look younger than they actually are so eh it's not a big surprise to me. Another thing I thought of why they use over the top physics on breast is well "pardon me for saying this since it might be sexist in nature", the Japanese woman are not well endowed if you catch my drift. So basically they don't have any thing that decent in terms of breast "from the amount of Asian porn I've watched anyways aside from J-cup specials >__>" Ahem basically I'm saying they are not a diverse group of people like us with a wide range of variety of breast sizes. If this post is found in an-way offensive or sexist I'm truly sorry but this just my honest opinion on the issue.

It would't be such a issue if they themselves weren't so pushing it. I knew everything what I needed to know of Team Ninja when they essentially said that there 'big feature' was the jiggle physics of the breasts of female character. The commercial that was showed in video really shows how they see it, or how at least the publisher sees it. "We have huge tits with physics on this 14 year old girl, isn't that hot?" No, it isn't and you certainly can't pull the 'cultural' card here. The game is also (and maybe even mainly) created for a western audience, so you are not supplying your own 'culture'.

No one in DoA is under the age of 18 expect for kasumi who is 17 and japan's law on AOC is 16 so there not breaking any laws.. okay I'm done defending them, it took all I had to just do this post.

Ignore double post... sorry

all i know is as a girl, if my boobs moved the way they do in DOA i'd try to remove them because they would be annoying as hell.

First of all, it's a bit weird amidst all the serious topics Jim takes on to lend his time to something like this. Ok, it was for the lulz, but it's really a non-issue.

Opening up with a hypocritical statement, despite being a jab at humor at people with fetishes, still washes the argument straight down the drain. People are against it, but still enough like it that the game sells, it's what they like, simple as that, screw all the shit about culture or whatever have you. It's borderline paedophelia, fine, but there's much worse going on around the world in terms of legal, even encouraged paedophilia and sex trade that jack shit is being done to stop. I'm more glad if people with closet inhibitions actually have some sort of outlet.

Accept it for what it is, there's a lot of shit that bothers people happening everyday, new music, fashion, mentalities, you can't go and dictate what people should and shouldn't like, otherwise we'd still be dressed like cavemen or listening to Mozart, and one mention against something like skinny jeans would stop that fad dead in its tracks. And don't even talk about "realism" in a "fantasy" game, c'mon people if there were purple-skinned zebra men fighting in this game no one would even bat an eyelid.

Jimothy Sterling:
Monster Boobs And Plastic Children

This week, Jim has something he'd like to get off his chest.

Watch Video

So, Jim, where does Tekken sit on this scale?

I'll agree wholeheartedly that the press statement Team Ninja released should simply have read:

"Dear Everyone,

We like big tits. Fuckin' deal.


Team Ninja"

Crass, certainly, honest, absolutely.



[quote="Cecilthedarkknight_234" post="6.389826.15647444"][quote="Cecilthedarkknight_234" post="6.389826.15647444"][quote="Jimothy Sterling" post="6.389826.15644341"][quote="Belated" post="6.389826.15644200"][quote="Jimothy Sterling" post="6.389826.15644162"][quote="Belated" post="6.389826.15644046"]
No one in DoA is under the age of 18 expect for kasumi who is 17 and japan's law on AOC is 16 so there not breaking any laws.. okay I'm done defending them, it took all I had to just do this post.

Ah, I remember those times. When E3 and the games industry gave exactly 0 fucks about being PC, and E3 was actually something to look forward to and devs did what they wanted.

Ayane is actually 16 - being Kasumi's younger sister. I think Kokoro might be 16 too.

Silly Jim Sterling. Don't you realize?

The Dead or Alive universe has a lower gravitational pull than our earth, allowing for boobs to flop like that!


Was I the only one expecting Jim's closing remark to Willem Dafoe to be something along the lines of "Do... do you have an erection?!"

Followup question: Did you ever manage to take Miniature Fantasy Willem Dafoe (now with Kung Fu Grip, batteries not included) to the zoo?

Being such a crowded sea bound country, you can't blame the Japanese for wanting girls with huge... "tracts of land"
But THIS is a bit much.

Can I never enter a thread without seing this video posted? Oo

Though now that I've seen clips from DOA thanks to Jim (thank God for Him), I can imagine at least one group of people that find bullet-dodging breasts perfectly realistic... I've had mine for years, and they have never EVER moved about on their own... They also tend to fall a lot more heavily than they seem to do in DOA, where they have this unnatural slow-mo quality to them, while the rest of the body moves at normal speed.

It does appear to have been made by people with little understanding of 'breast physics', or physics in general. Episode was funny though!

Being such a crowded sea bound country, you can't blame the Japanese for wanting girls with huge... "tracts of land"
But THIS is a bit much.

Is it bad I find that hilarious?

Then again, I find anything that doesn't follow any sort of coherent thought hilarious.

On topic, I can understand why breast physics don't work. Boob physics is just like body fat physics, its just outside our tech's grasp for the foreseeable future. You might as well accept that's the best we're ever going to get in the body department.

I know only one person who ever made actually realistic physics on a body, and he is unfortunately dead and only made a VERY short video (less than 30 seconds).

So, Jim what's it like to fuck a fleshlight?

I hear it's like fucking a flashlight.



If Team Ninja outright said they have a tit fetish, wouldnt that be bad PR?

I believe Itagaki himself said something akin to that in an interview several years back. Don't quote me on that however; lemme see if I can find the interview featured on DoA2U...

Here we go. I'm pretty sure this is the one.

OT: Yet another reason why many, myself included, laud DoA3 as the best in the series. Speaking purely about the breast physics, sure, while the sizes and shapes themselves were a little exaggerated, the actual movements were subtle and somewhat natural (I guess... it's been a while). Either way, the breasts didn't move like a pair of water balloons on a see-saw like in some of the more recent DoA games.

At least things haven't gotten as ridiculous as some of the lady-type characters in the Soul Calibur series, with Sophitia being the worst offender...

Addendum: Don't get me wrong, I love DoA; it's my favorite 3D fighter series next to Soul Calibur. And don't get me wrong further, I love breasts as much as the next guy (or gal); hell, Queen's Blade is one of my favorite anime (Elina and Tomoe all day). But having breasts that jiggle like a bowl of gelatin during an earthquake is a little unnerving.

Addendum addendum: I mean... just a little.

Ya know I actually sat down and watched the whole thing and I noticed one key part that was translated in the interview.

"If the developers are so skilled at making nude hacks(for DOAX volleyball) they should use their talents in better ways. I understand that they would want to see the characters naked but if they do that they should be embarrassed".

That right there demonstrates that along with the rest of the episode that Itagaki cares more about entertainment that involves sexuality rather than what everyone here shaming the franchise that has been with us for over 15 years. The DOA franchise is about making the best game possible and utilized something that would also be able to hook people from the outset. The women of DOA were certainly that hook but the game wouldn't of been successful if it wasn't a good game with good characters. Tecmo delivered that in spades where you would actually like the characters and understand that characters had conflict.

That was a good video to watch and people should understand that if DOA is really some monster that should be exiled from the video game industry then your priorities have stopped where you have video games as a hobby but instead an overzealous consumer whose complaints equal to that of the religious right trying to control a product that you have no investment or control of. You need to remind yourself that video games don't have to reflect reality and your expectations as a consumer for realism is only you demonstrating your ineptitude as a consumer as you demand for games to be fun and imaginative but the second you see a game that just wants to be entertaining with a little bit of sexuality you demand for that realism to take precedence over anything else. Having games as a hobby means that you should be looking forward to a developers work, not backseat driving demanding changes like you are one of the head programmers.

This insane demand for realism has really got to stop from the consumer side because in the video game industry's pursuit for more realistic graphics it has come to a point where the consumer demand for this realism in video games has started to hurt the video game industry because it should be treated as an ART STYLE and not the goal.

EDIT: also my favorite character to play in the series is Jann-Lee.

I actually prefer it when women where more clothes, leaves a bit more to the imagination if you ask me. ;)


What children?

You can create a digital representation of a child, check age 18 in its biography box or whatever, but it still looks like a child. Feel free to pretend otherwise to alleviate your post-masturbatory guilt, however.

Oh, I disagree with you so I must masturbate to video games. Great to see the high level of debate is being kept alive on the Escapist forums.

I have never played the game but none of the women in the videos that have been played looking anything like a child. I am fully aware that some anime does the whole "draw an obviously young child, claim she is 18" thing but no one in any of the videos shown looked like that.

The message I'm getting here is "make boobs in games more realistic." I support this position. If you're going to have big boobs in a game, they must flop around in a realistic believable fashion.

I guess I'm a sexual deviant, then. Not that that's any surprise, really. In fact, I've known it for a long time. That may not be the way breasts work in real life, but I'm sure as hell going to enjoy them in all of their fake, fantastic, imagined, unreal glory. I'm not particularly fond of real women, anyway.

Still an entertaining episode, though. Jim, you're a funny guy, even if I don't share your views.

Are you a misogynist or gay? Or are you simply a teenage boy that has yet to have encountered a real woman in your life? Or think all women are raging feminazis?

I guess to each their own I suppose, though I should point out that nerd culture is perceived to be the final bastion for misogynists and other men that want nothing to do with women outside of a sexual context. DOA and such games get the attention that they do because they are reminders of that belief.

Though I wanted to bring up the simple point that while real breast don't do that, I suspect that many men wished they did. After all, porn and anything related to it are projections of what the creator (and in turn their fans) wish sex was like, so it isn't hard to believe that there are man that wished boobies were as they are depicted in DOA.

Thank you for confirming that.

So, Jim what's it like to fuck a fleshlight?

I hear it's like fucking a flashlight.

Basically this. A fleshlight is a male sex-toy that is designed to look like a large flashlight for the purpose of digression (like if a wayward kid or spouse stumbled on it). It has a top that twists off revealing a molded impression of usually a pussy or anus of a woman (in fact a marketing point for many of these fleshlights is that these are modeled after famous porn stars).

I gather the one Jim used on the William DeFoe Doll was a smaller version of said device, or merely the fleshlight minus the flashlight-like casing and just the molding.

Ok I've never actually played a Team Ninja game (Metroid Other M doesn't count because I gave up on that before I finished it because it was so bad)

But who cares? There are plenty of other gaming issues that people could spend their time on than this that has been done to death about a decade ago. They want to make boobs that defy gravity; whatever I guess it's no skin off my neck, it's not anything worse than whats in the Witcher 2.

Sounds like Jim is just reaching for a topic this week.

The New Dante can put any part of himself into any part of me as well Jim.

...He's so dreamy...

I partly disagree about your comment about culture being an excuse. I agree that no one should have a right to 'complain' if they localize the game and people of another culture find it creepy, but telling them it's wrong?

To be completely honest, I dislike otaku culture and I also find it disturbing. But with that said, it is Japanese culture and, while I find it disturbing, I find that I have to respect it. I will NEVER tell someone that what their culture is wrong. No matter how alien and strange another culture's customs are to me, I will always do my best to respect them. Well... as long as it's not a crime against humanity.

I agree with you on the general topic of this video, though. The fake body of teenage anime girls with bouncing watermelon breasts is really gross to me. I was raised in the United States to think it's wrong, so I do. But in Japan they aren't raised that way and I think it's IMMENSELY rude to tell them that they're wrong because they were raised with different customs.

Have and played DoA5. Will say that the breast physics are not as bad as what is shown in DoAEBV2. I enjoy the way they move, I meant the way the characters react to pain and don't give a single reaction animation for nearly every type of physical hit. I notice those details and love it.

As for the whole, "Big Breasts on Kids." *sigh* Look, whether we like it or not the age of consent is 13+ in Japan, with varying ages per area of course :P. We don't have to approve of it, but at that age the "kids" can have a full time or part time job, you know become responsible adults? I can't say the same thing for "kids" of the West. -_- That is what I believe they may of been saying when they meant "culture". Though I can just be shining it up a bit. Most importantly, the "west" is more okay with sexual consent at the age of 18 regardless of how young the person looks. I am a older woman lover myself, 28+, and when I see a far older man date a 18 year old I feel more disturbed. Just, I can't unsee the baby fat on those teenagers -_-.

I don't agree with Jim on this at all. It's opinions like this that we don't get a lot of good Japanese games. If you don't like it, don't buy it or review it, don't tell Japanese developers how to make a game mainly for their home market. Would you rather have a flat chested "International" version of DOA5? Everyone will try to import the Japanese version while ignoring the international version if that's the case.

And yet, this will probably be your most watched video.... *sigh*

As a kid of the 90s, I think Jim isn't condemning the effort, more the execution, I'm surprised he didn't suggest they research some of the most classic boob movements of all.


If in DOA6 (or whatever the next one is), if they moved like that, I think we'd all be more satisfied.

Pff, you all have obviously NOT seen enough hentai to know what Japanese mean by HUGE tits. Those gals in DoA5? Nah, 'bout average hentai teens to be gangbanged by tentacled aliens.

THIS is what they mean by BIG:

And this is what they mean by HUGE.

I feel kinda ashamed now and I don't even like huge tits. I prefer petite girls!

It's funny, I see people get defensive about these things and say stuff like "It's bad to generalize that all Japanese media is like that." But it's hard not to when it seems to pop up in almost all anime and such.

Take One Piece for example. It's the most popular anime/manga in Japan right now (for good reasons, it really is quite good) but even One Piece gives its female characters ridiculous breast sizes.

I mean look at the character Nami for example:

...This is all for educational purposes of course...

*wibble wibble wibble wibble wibble*


The boobs in DOA though, yeah no... I didn't enjoy that. I was captivated by their movement sure, but the entire time I was thinking "BOOBS DON'T MOVE LIKE THAT!!!!"

Well it's supposed to simulate invisible hands moving them, that's why they move more than "naturally". And as an owner of similar sized attributes, the movement doesn't seem that weird to me if you take into account the pad simulating hands producing the movement.


Andy of Comix Inc:
These are the kind of issues I'd like to see being dug much deeper into. The Dead or Alive series creeps a lot of people out, but it can't just be the alien breasts. There's something more to it - something sinister - something about the way Team Ninja treats women in their games in general. It's beyond aesthetic, it's beyond fetishization and sexualization, there's something in the way they do it that stinks. In fact, I'd condone someone writing an essay on this subject.

There's something very, very wrong with Team Ninja.

As the Game Overthinker stated in "I heart Bayanetta" (episode 32) the head to body proportions of the "woman" in _Dead and Alive_ are for a lack of a better term "off" so you are already going into the Uncanny Valley. Throw in the breast physics and you are on the bullet train to Uncanny Valley Central.

To be fair to Team Ninja take a good hard look at nearly any adult female character that comes out of Japan and you will see the huge tracks of land on them. Heck even Ranma in his female form is sporting a C to D. The running gag through out the Slayers anime series and prequels is that Lina Inverse has small breasts and blows her top (followed by much of the landscape) when somebody points this out.

Team Ninja is a symptom of a much larger problem and it is not just in Japan either. Pick up about any American comic book and you quickly run into what is jokingly call the helium breast implant. Australia even has a law on the books forbidding woman with breasts "too small" from being shown nude under the guise of it supporting under age porn; I guess Baum was right--the Scarecrow (man without a brain) is truly ruling Oz (nickname for Australia).

The problem is not with Team Ninja but with our own messed up in the head attitudes regarding sexuality.

Oh god, I so agree with this. I was replaying Batman: Arkham City and I was really enjoying the male characters and the depth of their mental unrest and the way they reacted and played off each other. Then female characters walked in with giant boobs and ditzy questions like "WAAT'S GOIN ON BAATMAAAAN??!!" ...I think it could just be Paul Dini being the head writer, but it's like... how could you screw up doing women so much? Especially in a game this good - with characterization this detailed for the male characters - how did they manage to barely match it with ANY of the female villains or allies? It's really... really... weird.

Not. Not weird. Wrong. It's wruung.

...so Team Ninja should devote more resources to make realistic breasts?

Guess they're OK with that.

I never thought it's a big deal. Really. That said, I've always adored Japanese culture.

And yeah, those don't look or move like real tits, but that's the thing that makes it funny.

The Lunatic:

Paragon Fury:
I never understood the "children" part of the insults to DoA.

Apparently people don't realize the youngest female character in the game is 16 (Ayane), which is perfectly acceptable (and legal) in Japan.

Thats not a child.

Applying a number to a character does not automatically make them that age in the eyes of the viewer.

Our perception of age is based upon appearance, and if all the characters appear younger than they actually are, and are being shown off in a sexual way.

It's just a bit odd really.

Not directly saying "They're kids", but, I'm just telling you how people could see it that way.

Maybe its something to do with Japan? I had a former classmate who was Korean, she looked around 13 even though she was 17. Even when I met her earlier last week (after 3 years) she still looked freakishly young. And judging by some short 10sec japaneese advertisements still stuck in some ripped animevideo's on sites I frequent... thats a rather normal thing for Japan.

Which is, I think (if you remain optimistic) what he meant by 'this is what we do in our culture' a lot of their girls look freakishly young. Or rather, maybe not to them but to us. And as such we see the characters younger than they might appear to the Japaneese viewer..

for the record I've never played dead or alive, so all this stuff is lost on me. I thought it was a tennis-game truth be told.

Although all this is lost when you consider that they marketed this game mainly to a western audience.

I have only found jiggle physics interesting once. I first heard of the notion when playing Aggressive Inline (such an odd relic from my past). I picked a female character and played for about 5 minutes, laughing with my friends the entire time... then, the fun was over.

Also, having never played DOA or been exposed to their cut scenes for more than short promos, I'm actually shocked at how comical and unrealistic the breasts are. Creepy stuff.

i downloaded a skyrim mod that added 'body physics' half the time it didn't work but the rest of the time the breasts, asses and hair of all the females jiggled so-much they bent the Armour textures and looked like they'd cause majour whiplash..
the problem is they have to add bones or meshes to the body and animate them because if they wanted actual fluid dynamics it would break your computer
a degree of subtlety and force falloff would probably help, but i'm no code monkey so ill leave that to the experts

it's simply another example of why they need to add jiggle physics, and physics in general
because we aren't going to get good, consistent physics in games until developers learn that physics is as essential as a floor texture or a character model or any gameplay mechanic

it's the same progression as we have from two dots on a screen that bump into each-other to fully 3d characters that can interact with such detail you can climb over someone and use them as a makeshift ladder to get to an area of a game you couldn't otherwise
( real example, witty wizzard's saints row play-through )

we shouldn't even bother mocking jiggle physics, we should embrace them and then demand they be better and consistent ( and in some cases tasteful )
it's the only way to move gaming forward


"They didn't cause the holocaust, they didn't kill anyone and they didn't cause an uproar among thousands of people." Who the hell said they did? Why the hell did you bring this up? What point could you have possibly been making that you would need this type of comparison? The point that they do need to take responsibility for is they need to look at faults in the game, and admit that it was their fault, not the audience's fault that it's there.

Saying that they "need to take responsibility" for something implies that they did something wrong, which they didn't. Their audience seems quite happy with their games and doesn't seem to regard it as a fault. I am not sure what fault you want them to admit to?
There were 11 different "Dead or Alive" titles since 1996 according to Wikipedia (not including additional editions, DLC etc.) and the series seems to still be going strong.

Maybe the "fault" is with the audience of people not buying the game, but demanding it to change so it caters to them or doesn't "offend" them?

I was explaining the persons position, I have no idea what faults there are in the games as I have never played them, but saying "the games weren't made for you" leaves a bad taste in my mouth, it reminds me of those people who defend games like Dark Souls or the developer who defended Amy and claimed we didn't "get" the game, and that they were good games, and we were the ones terrible at them.

Aside from that you didn't answer any of the questions I asked you.

I imagine films made in the US that would be offensive in other countries are simply not shown in other countries, or they are altered.

You would imagine wrong, you are also on the Internet, which people have access to worldwide (well, mostly).

My mistake then, in that case I can't defend them.

Then you are bringing up the story of the other film, WHY are you blaming the person who made the video and not the murderers? WHY are you lumping people in this comments section in with that trailer? It is not hypocrisy to demand a change to something if you are the market and they are trying to get you to buy their product, NOBODY before you brought up that trailer, it would only be hypocrisy if they defend that trailer, and then agree with Jim.

Well, gee, thanks for (somewhat, cursory) getting my point. Why are people blaming Team Ninja exactly and what for? Were there great boob-outrage riots somewhere that I missed? And how does the "culture defense" not apply for them (yes, Japanese culture is different from American/European one), but whenever the US does something which pisses off an entire culture and a lot of people are taking a lot more serious it does? (Example: YOU and the first sentence you said)

People blame Team Ninja for putting giant boobs on characters they think are too young to have them, or they think the boobs themselves are too big, that is blaming a designer for something the designer directly DID, not blaming the designer for something the designer inadvertently CAUSED.
Please don't respond to me as if those are points I am trying to make, I am not, as I already stated, I am not a fan of the series, and don't buy their games, though I don't think the culture defence applies and here's why, they make no effort to explain how or why the culture is different, and I don't expect them to give a full course or anything, but even having footnotes or something in the manual would be better than nothing.
Also, I'm Canadian, you don't need to be an American to get pissed off at your first statement (which I still have no idea why you wrote that).

Jim Sterling:
"If you sell you game internationally then you are not allowed to pander to your own culture"

Are you THIS fucking moronic Jim?

Team Ninja doesn't have a "responsibility" to do JACK FUCKING SHIT, buy it, or don't buy it. You don't have the right to make demands.

I've never bought a Dead or Alive game in my fucking life, but seriously Jim, shut the fuck up.

Oh, and I LOVE the part where you go "You aren't allowed to pander to the fans who want the big tits, I'm not a fan, and that clearly means that you have to pander to ME! And I DON'T want big tits.

Jesus fucking Christ. You've made some pretty damn retarded videos during your time on this website, but I think this tops all of them.

*wibble wibble wibble wibble wibble*

Jelly on a plate!
Ah, I remember that when I wasa kid.

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