Yahtzee Croshaw
Yahztee Croshaw is a British comedic writer, video game journalist, humorist, author, and video game developer.

    Finding a Game in the Misery and Ecstasy of Long Distance Relationships

    Previous article

    Earth’s Mightiest Heroes Conquer Depression in Avengers: Endgame

    Next article

    32 Comments

    1. “A goddess trying to reset time.” Women, always lying about their age, am I right fellas?

      1. AAAEEEEEE

    2. I think the complaints about the skimpy costumes were less because they removed them and more about how they made a big deal about how they were removing them and how they were dumb and impractical. It stinks of that “Boob plate is dumb” argument you hear whenever someone wants to complain about fantasy women wearing form fitting armor. Is it dumb? Yeah (though not for the “Directs blows to the heart” reason people claim because that was entirely made up by one guy who makes armor on etsy and was quoted in a Kotaku article) but so is everything else about fantasy if you look at it with a critical eye. Mortal Kombat has people getting their hearts torn out MID MATCH and what they’re wearing seems to provide about equal defense regardless of if its a string bikini or a suit of power armor. So armor means nothing and they seem to tank damage better than the undead so in this battle of bullshit nitpicking they’ve soundly defeated themselves

      Also they still kept the guys all shirtless and in loincloths so it just felt like them attempting to stir up a controversy or pander to the group of people who hate women in anything more revealing than a burka.

      1. It sounded more like pandering to the fuckos who aren’t even the target audience.

    3. Don’t know why Warner Brothers seem to get away with much worse Microtransaction practices than EA.
      Shao Khan as a pre-order DLC? And people actually defend this?

      1. Namco and Tecmo Koei are in the running too. 1200 dollars of DOA DLC was noted previously. All fighting games seems to be ripping core characters out and selling them back to you.

    4. I’ll be honest, after all the pointless live service crap, I was in the bizarre position of being an MK fan who was looking forward to Yahtzee roasting this game over a spit. Kinda disappointed he was so restrained.

    5. It definitely had lots of issues. I remember watching the beginning of story mode online. A gentle mother-daughter moment between Sonya and Cassie before a sparring match, followed by the actual fight, where I saw Cassie shoot Sonya in the head and shove a power drill right through her skull. I’ll be very impressed if they ever manage to actually make a solid bridge between their dumb fun and their heartfelt storytelling, because they really don’t go well together.

    6. If only he still had Gabe

    7. I bought the game, learned this and that and now getting my ass kicked in online mode. Anyone who plays fighting games knows that learning them is hard and very exhausting. Would be much nicer if I could run into a bikini warrior here and there and appreciate her beauty while she rips out my entrails. Instead I have to watch some odd chick in a burka. If I could I’d refund the game by now. There is plenty of fighting games out there and none of them afraid to show some skin. Only DOA has bad rep for it but all of the Japanese fighting games have bikini warriors. MK has the brutality of fatalities, fatal blows etc. but they become annoying over time and I could watch the dumbness of the story mode on youtube.

    8. Hot damn are the comments toxic and ill informed…

    9. One thing I can’t stand about modern fighting games is the amount of DLC. You pay what, £50 out for the standred game then by the time you pay for all the DLC you will have paid double or more of that. What they are is no longer a test of skill, just a test of how much money you are willing to waste.

    10. And thus Netherealm ensures that people will only go buy games with skimpy costumes and not theirs.

      But there’ll still be SFM porn of their characters readily available for free anyway, so who cares.

    11. Removing the bikini costumes encapsulates everything I despise about moral outrages. Gratuitous visceral violence is cool, but let’s protect the children from aggressive displays of navel! Go fuck yourselves. Yes, I wanna see boobies. I like boobies. Fuck you and anyone who tries to shame me for it. Putting women in burqas doesn’t make you more sophisticated or “grownup”, it only makes you look like a fucking hypocrite and a sexually repressed asshole.

      1. Damn right! Let’s see some tits for freedom!

        Also, maybe a 2D platforming mode with lots of trampolines.

        For the titties.

        Also for fitness.

        Because you need reminding that if you don’t pay attention to the one, you will never ever get to see the other except on yourself.

      2. While this could have been phrased more eloquently, I agree with the underlying message, as much as I can being a straight female. The point about gratuitous visceral violence being more socially acceptable than acknowledging the fact that we have breasts, in particular, is the one I agree with. “Ripping a person to pieces is fine, but demonstrating what a woman looks like when they AREN’T ripped to pieces is just so amoral!” WTF?

        1. Apparently, showing a woman’s spilled intestines is less controversial than showing her midriff or cleavage. Meanwhile, half the male characters fight with exposed chests.

    12. Netherealm: “It would be silly to go into a fight with a bikini. That’s why all women are covered up so far, they could convert to islam”
      Also Netherealm: “Men are all shirtless, cuz…uhm…slayqueeeeen”

      1. All sisters are welcome to have some amount of decency

      2. did you know the character designer is a gay man? it actually explains a lot.

    13. I think this video echoes a lot of what MovieBob said in a recent Game Overthinker episode about how pointless and silly changing the women’s costumes to be more “woke” is, while building on the inherent scumminess of the lootbox system. And since when did fighting games start putting on airs, especially Mortal Kombat? They’re sleazy dumb fun, so they should embrace that!

      1. wow, I never thought I’d see the day where bob said something, that didn’t sound like his head was a mile up his own ass.

    14. Well Ronda Rousey, that notorious Sandy Hook denier, is on the cast as Sonya Blade and I sure as hell do not want to buy a product that ends up giving money to her.

    15. I think they switched from bikinis to real clothes for two reasons
      1) It gives them more places to stick “cosmetics” on
      2) To appeal to a broader market who like the gore but roll their eyes at the cheese cake
      The first one was probably the bigger factor

    16. Mortal Kombat: PLEASE TAKE US SERIOUSLY!

      Not when you cast Ronda Rousey, you chuckleheads

    17. Curse you, Gadget!

      1. Next time, Gadget! NEXT TIME!

    18. I still find it funny that people were complaining about the bikini/tits thing when I was under the impression that Mortal Kombat’s thing was the over the top violence while tits was DoA’s thing. While yeah there were skimpy outfits and larger than average tits in Mortal Kombat, that wasn’t really what it was known for.

    19. Yahtzee’s Dr. Claw voice is the best thing I’ve heard all week.

      1. Oddly, not the first instance of yahtzee doing that on the internet.

      2. Next time Sabbot, Next time!

      3. He’s voice acted before hasn’t he? If not he definitely should.

    Leave a reply

    Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *