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"I didn't hear the people sing. You know why? becaUSE EVERYONE FUCKING DIED"

"That kid was so fucking stupid."
I start sculpting Salt in ice.

"Yes please."

Better start looking.

There are four crypts in four chambers. Each chamber is protected behind a locked gate. Two gates each have a symbol, etched in iron.



The others iron pots, each bearing a colored flame. One blue, and one green.

Where to start?

"..." I throw a hint coin at the Celtic cross.

The cross gives a loud chime that reverberates throughout the village. Your ears ring. The warlocks cover their ears.

Something to do with sound, maybe?

I clear my throat slightly and sing at the top of my lungs, using the gasmask to amplify the vibrations.

"I don't even know what you guys are talking about, I'm just tagging along for the ride."

I cover Tox in tags.

You successfully crack your voice.

Your ears finally stop ringing. Your hearing is... Surprisingly clear. You can hear the sound of water dripping down the narrow path.

"Yay?" I follow the sound.


How long does this fucker go? You must be underneath the river by now.

You feel a wet drop fall on your head and look up. There is a small crack in the ceiling, with small droplets falling every few seconds.

... from all your filthiness, and from all your idols, will I cleanse you.

Dammit Ezekial, now isn't the time.

"He has a point. I don't think I've showered since I entered the mall." I begin to run back to the crypt.

I gain the perk Vandal Spirit from all of the tags, which raises my Street Smarts stat by 10.

You run back to the crypt. It is getting very, very warm down here. That fire isn't letting up.

You stand in front of the gate with the cross. The gate itself is pristine, though now you notice the cross is corroded.

On the left, beside the gate is a small scale, and on the floor below it a chipped stone cup.

And he shewed me a pure river of water of life, clear as crystal...

I use Peake to freeze the door leading back to the church. I pour the contents of the cup into the scale. "Man I wish I wasn't terrible at puzzles forever."

I funk over to Tox.

Paddy the Second:
I use Peake to freeze the door leading back to the church. I pour the contents of the cup into the scale. "Man I wish I wasn't terrible at puzzles forever."

Paddy, the cup is empty.

I fill the cup with my tears.

That's going to take a while.

I take the cup to the source of the noise of water.

You hold up the cup.


This is still taking too long.

The stone above you is soft. You may be able to break it away.

I punch the ceiling. Hard.

Too hard. You are pummeled by a wall of water and stone, rendering you unconscious.

You awaken with a deep gash on the side of your skull, and a few broken ribs to go along with it. Whatever. You got what you need.

I run back and pour the water into the scales, taking some heroin to numb the pain.

You hear something unlock inside the crypt, but the gate itself is still locked.

I look into Isaac's glasses. "Dude, where didya get dose sick shades, dog? And is dat thing VV Cephei?"

"I found them in the University a few systems across. There's a bunch of fighters in there as well."

"Shiet, son, you should have told dat earliah! What kind o' university?"

"Uuuh." I run to the gate with the other symbol on it and inspect it closer.

A intricate series of cogs and gizmos ordain the gate. Inlaid is some kind of rail system that connects the gate's handle, on the left side, to its slot on the right. It seems if you want to get in, you must maneuver the knob through a series of obstacles.

The wall of ice cracks from the heat. You do not have much time before it shatters.

Do you wish to continue, or return to the last gate?

I extinguish the flames on the other two gates with water from the corridor and tear the knob from the wall, reinserting it on the other side.

"Its an infinity expanding university, filled with tons of random crap. And the fighters are called Tlas, Yddap, Xot, Yblirt, Efink and Amgis."

The flames flicker, but aren't extinguished. Seems they are lit by something other than oil or coals.

The handle slips right off. You try to slide it into its slot, but the rail blocks it. Whoever made this thing wants you to play the game.

"Xot? I heard dat name somewhere before."

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